Depressed Date, Should I Continue Dating Her?

[Lamps]

Hello,

A couple of weeks ago I went on a date with a woman. She is in her twenties and I am somewhere between 30-35 years old. Before we met she texted me the following:
Are you sure you want to meet me?

I have lots of scars and I am fat.
I have warned you.

I went on a date with her and I really liked her and I want to continue dating her.
After a couple of days she told me that she was struggelig with depression.

She said she said that she was "far down and the she thought that it would not be good to wake up tomorrow."
Me: If you have suicide thoughts you should contact the emergency room.
Her: I am okay.
Me. It is great to hear that you do not have suicide thoughts.
She: I dont know.
The day after she applogised for last night.

After a cuple of days I asked her how serious her depression is and she replied that it was not serious. However, I think that she just downplays her depression so that she seems more attractive to me. As I think that she sensed that it made me less interested in her after she told me that "she did not want to wake up" some days earlier.
Both her and I are interested in having two kids in the future.

How depressed do you think that this woman is?
If I get her pregnant with two children can her depression be worse and can her depression affect the future childeren?

Thank you very much for answering.
Have a great day.

 

[xaragedom]

Yes, If you want to plus you liked her, you will regret if you stop dating her. Probably she was abused because she id fat if she said that she is fat to you before meeting. Accepting her and DON'T finding solution to her problems (like saying that we will get on a diet or sth) is a sometimes a key to helping people.

 

[TomRiddle]

How depressed do you think that this woman is?
If I get her pregnant with two children can her depression be worse and can her depression affect the future childeren?

With all do respect because i don't know you guys personally but sometimes i wonder if this forum only attracts mentally unstable people. How the f*** could some internet strangers answer those questions? Your the one dating her, your the one who knows her in reality, how the f*** can you ask us "how depressed do you think that this woman is"?

And if i answer real depressed dump her what are you gonna do, actually dump her? Wtf mate, grow up, and what the f*** does that mean that you are somewhere between 30 and 35? Today you are 30 and tomorrow 35?

I suggest you take her by the hand and go both and seek some therapy, i think it could benefit you also not just her....

 

[INT]

You went on a date with a woman and are already thinking about kids?

 

[DoctorHouse]

Hello,

A couple of weeks ago I went on a date with a woman. She is in her twenties and I am somewhere between 30-35 years old. Before we met she texted me the following:
Are you sure you want to meet me?

I have lots of scars and I am fat.
I have warned you.

I went on a date with her and I really liked her and I want to continue dating her.
After a couple of days she told me that she was struggelig with depression.

She said she said that she was "far down and the she thought that it would not be good to wake up tomorrow."
Me: If you have suicide thoughts you should contact the emergency room.
Her: I am okay.
Me. It is great to hear that you do not have suicide thoughts.
She: I dont know.
The day after she applogised for last night.

After a cuple of days I asked her how serious her depression is and she replied that it was not serious. However, I think that she just downplays her depression so that she seems more attractive to me. As I think that she sensed that it made me less interested in her after she told me that "she did not want to wake up" some days earlier.
Both her and I are interested in having two kids in the future.

How depressed do you think that this woman is?
If I get her pregnant with two children can her depression be worse and can her depression affect the future childeren?

Thank you very much for answering.
Have a great day.

If you like her and don't mind being her therapist from time to time, then keep getting to know her. I don't understand why you are even planning on having children with her when you just met. Are you looking for an instant serious relationship or are you still wanting to play the field?

 

[swingline747]

Id bail TBH

 

[Hangin'on Hair]

Run away! Mentally unstable women are a bad idea.
Fat, lots of scars? .... From what.... self harming?

If so, run to the hills.

 

[michaelle]

I think it's your call, if you think you want to, you should continue. But if you are not happy, just stop... There is so much fish out there You can try some dating services like the one from here, for example. Maybe you will find something good for you on one of those, good luck with it

 

[DogoDiLaurentiis]

She sounds like a headcase but there might be something good there, I have dealt with women like that and I'm telling you that you have to be 100% solid as a rock psychologically because otherwise you're going to be driven nuts by her going back and forth into depressive events.

My wife is the solid as a rock one in our relationship, I'm not prone to being in and out of depression, but when I was working long hours doing oilfield construction I did not have a lot of patience and she was pretty amazing about it.

Just be careful, women like that can have BPD and if that's the case she will, and I mean, 1000% cheat on you, women with BPD cheat, it's an inevitability and for that reason I would never date one.

JFC do not have kids with some woman you're just dating off the bat and find her to be unstable. Post partum depression can f*** up women really bad and if she's depressed and suicidal she damn near might.

 

[jjuliajul11]

It is very difficult to overcome depression yourself. My best friend was depressed because his girlfriend left him. He didn't want anything, just to be alone. I wanted to help him but didn't know how. I found some good ways on Canada Drugs. I spent a lot of time with him, went to the gym regularly, did his favorite hobby - recording music. I also read there about antidepressants. I asked him some time to take them and he agreed. In a few weeks he really got better. I think you should try not to leave her alone and help her in everything and I think you will be fine.

 

[DogoDiLaurentiis]

Serotonergic drugs are terrible for your body chemistry, beware.

 

[fauxhawk]

Drop her like a bad habit

 

[justinbieberscombover]

Serotonergic drugs are terrible for your body chemistry, beware.

Fearmongering. Like finasteride for some it's bad and for some it isn't.

I took them for years with very little to zero problems.

It also depends on the dosage I believe. I took the lowest possible so not many side effects.

 

[DogoDiLaurentiis]

Fearmongering. Like finasteride for some it's bad and for some it isn't.

I took them for years with very little to zero problems.

It also depends on the dosage I believe. I took the lowest possible so not many side effects.

I took cymbalta and I had an especially horrible case of serotonin syndrome, not everyone is the same. People with naturally high dopamine levels might be ok, but people with naturally high dopamine levels are also inclined to commit more crimes. I can't tolerate smoking marijuana for the same reason, it jacks your serotonin levels and lowers your dopamine and makes you feel like sh*t and gives you terrible headaches if it gets that bad.

As I said, beware.

 

[INT]

I think it should be only your decision. Yes, it might be hard to date a person who suffers from depression, but sometimes love works great. I met a good guy on the silver dating site. We became friends pretty fast (that was not usual for me). Later I found out he had depression. I asked him whether I could help him. He only asked me not to pay attention to it. It turned out that he did his best to fight depression (did sports, led a healthy lifestyle, worked with therapists, etc.). Maybe it is too early to talk about depression with a girl after one date, she might be not ready to tell you about her problems.

Another failed attempt at linkbuilding.

 

[jensyy]

I am curious if you too are still dating) would you like to share with us what happened with you?

 

[SamSteward]

I think it's worth a try, you don't lose anything.