Embarrassment of re-growth?

[Rudiger]

I know this is a laughable topic for most on here desperately trying to gain regrowth (me as well- no current regrowth going on right now), but for those who have had success, has anyone had a problem admitting to their vanity?

Because a lot of us try to act like hair loss doesn't bother us (when most people probably see right through the facade anyway but oh well) and suddenly then to start shedding, and eventually start to show regrowth, everyone around you knows the effort you're going to get that, and although I'd definitely take it tomorrow, people will find it a bit, funny.

I get the feeling this thought will get possibly some hostility but mainly a complete lack of understanding, I'm expecting a "are you kidding enjoy the growth and who cares what people think brah" take on this, but I mean we all clearly care a lot what people think. We can pretend we're doing it solely for ourselves but we don't see our own baldness for 99% of the day, other people do, and that's what we worry about.

If I ever got noticeable regrowth my first thought would be delight, and my second would be slight worry, over every person I know wondering what's happening with my hair lately, asking questions, and whether I'd lie and deny the effort I've gone to.

Anyone?

 

[xetudor]

You don't own other people ****. Hatters gonna hate. You should enjoy your success and that's it.

 

[Rudiger]

I appreciate the sentiment and hey, you're completely right, in the long term I shouldn't give a ****. But if it did come to it, I'd be self-conscious.

Can't help it, and it won't stop me going for it, I'm just wondering if anyone else feels the same.

 

[g.i joey]

I know whay you mean, if I do end up getting some regrowth soon (2 months finasteride) I'm just gonna tell them it was the rogaine. All my friends are so uneducated about hair loss so they would.be easy to fool, even the ones with hairloss don't know of any treatments and one even think it's due to "stress". Anyways the regrowth would be so minimal it would probably take someone who hasn't seen you in a while to notice.

 

[pepgea]

People that really care and see all your struggle are going to be supportive. Don't listen to others that want to let you down.
You must be able to do whatever you want with the hair you have or hair you don't have, everything else doesn't matter.

 

[Notcoolanymore]

My hair was buzzed for years, so when people ask I just say that I am just growing it out.

 

[JDW]

Why should you feel embarrassed? Would you feel ashamed of going to the gym and getting in shape?

 

[g.i joey]

Why should you feel embarrassed? Would you feel ashamed of going to the gym and getting in shape?

a more reasonable comparison is, would u feel ashamed going to the gym and getting huge cause of steroids. Would you tell people it was the roids or natural bulk?

 

[CaptainForehead]

a more reasonable comparison is, would u feel ashamed going to the gym and getting huge cause of steroids. Would you tell people it was the roids or natural bulk?

Lets ask the hollywood actors who in 6 months manage to gain 30 pounds of muscles, and simultaneously lose 20 pounds of fat.

 

[Rudiger]

People that really care and see all your struggle are going to be supportive. Don't listen to others that want to let you down.
You must be able to do whatever you want with the hair you have or hair you don't have, everything else doesn't matter.

It's not that I'm afraid of people openly criticizing or embarrassing me, not many adults would be that cruel and un-civil. But people talk about people, they talk about you, you talk about them, we all do it a bit.

I think it's just that I've never come across a person who fixed their hairline, through transplant or otherwise, I've never been around anyone like that, I don't know how people react to it, I don't know if you become "the guy that was almost bald once" and not even in a horribly negative way, just in a, "that's kinda weird" way. I suppose actually a lot of people would think it's pretty impressive.

Boiling it down makes me realise I'm over-thinking it. But again this isn't a horrible fear of mine and doesn't put me off treating it at all, I guess nobody likes being defined by their hair after worrying about it for years. Ho-hum.

 

[xetudor]

This is a opportunity to weed out the idiots from the people that care about you. If they will make feel ashamed of something that makes you happy then they are truly awful human beings.

 

[blackg]

People are just too ****ing nosey to begin with.
When I'm out having a drink at my local, I'm always astounded at the amount of gossip that goes on there.

Fuqking annoys me....and this is MEN I'm talking about.
God damn, men. Gossiping like a bunch of b****s!!!

I try to sit on my own most of the time.
That way I can avoid the prying questions about my life.

 

[DannyBoyy]

If they diss you etc they are not worth your time, would people say **** if it was a woman? so why to a man? cause we ment to be macho? you want hair, dont feel bad, i had a similar worry, i didnt care for balding i just didnt want people to diss etc, now that i stopped caring i walk around with my bald head held high, do they diss me? maybe, but im sure im not important enough to be on strangers minds they are to busy doing whatever, i know its a different worry but point is dont care about them, just do what you want to do and be happy.

 

[JDW]

a more reasonable comparison is, would u feel ashamed going to the gym and getting huge cause of steroids. Would you tell people it was the roids or natural bulk?

Yeah that's true, fairer comparison.
**** other people though, do what makes you happy and when you're happier in yourself you give less of a care what others say

 

[I.D WALKER]

Yes, in general people will be critical no matter where you are in life. Particularly when it comes to a dialogue about one's appearance. Constructive criticism is

one thing that we seldom receive outside the social border(s) of our personal comfort zone. Like the validation we may see from a trusted friend or close family member.

The point is that in your pursuit of happiness, or in your case acquiring a better head of hair, one ought not concern themselves with the scrutiny (real/imagined) of a stranger or

business associates. This thinking pattern when reinforced will start to trickle into other freely moving parts that make up your notion of self identity. Over time it will injure your

self esteem and only cause you anger. By trusting yourself on your journey to self improvement you will become your own spirited master.

 

[GoldenMane]

Nobody every noticed me going bald afaik, and while I have been getting more compliments on my hair since beginning treatment, it was never super obvious because i had long hair and bangs. So nobody noticed.... But I tell people anyway! I'm pretty open with some of my friends about it. I've even seen a few old clasmates from school down the pub last Christmas who mentioned their hair loss and told them upfront that I was on finasteride and rogaine. Not ashamed. I'd tell pretty much anyone.

 

[rocklegends]

Yes, in general people will be critical no matter where you are in life. Particularly when it comes to a dialogue about one's appearance. Constructive criticism is

one thing that we seldom receive outside the social border(s) of our personal comfort zone. Like the validation we may see from a trusted friend or close family member.

The point is that in your pursuit of happiness, or in your case acquiring a better head of hair, one ought not concern themselves with the scrutiny (real/imagined) of a stranger or

business associates. This thinking pattern when reinforced will start to trickle into other freely moving parts that make up your notion of self identity. Over time it will injure your

self esteem and only cause you anger. By trusting yourself on your journey to self improvement you will become your own spirited master.

Absolutely this. One thing you will notice is that folks will downplay you losing hair at the outset, only to turn around and be the first person to laugh at you when you go bald. Honestly, if anyone is insensitive and crass enough to get on you for that, they are not worth your time and you should sever the relationship then and there. true friends are with you from tribulation to joy.

I will never forget what one of my first bosses told me when I started working: you can spend your entire life pleasing others. Odds are someone will not like you eventually, but you will be the one who lost himself, and you will be miserable in the process. If you do it for yourself, and yourself only, it will weed out the fake people in your life. The result? you'll find yourself, will be a happier and stronger version of yourself, and you will discover the people in your life that matter"

do what makes you feel happy. F*ck the rest.

 

[Rudiger]

^Nice post.

Yes, in general people will be critical no matter where you are in life. Particularly when it comes to a dialogue about one's appearance. Constructive criticism is

one thing that we seldom receive outside the social border(s) of our personal comfort zone. Like the validation we may see from a trusted friend or close family member.

The point is that in your pursuit of happiness, or in your case acquiring a better head of hair, one ought not concern themselves with the scrutiny (real/imagined) of a stranger or

business associates. This thinking pattern when reinforced will start to trickle into other freely moving parts that make up your notion of self identity. Over time it will injure your

self esteem and only cause you anger. By trusting yourself on your journey to self improvement you will become your own spirited master.

Very well said and pretty much the perfect response which is right on the wavelength of this topic.

 

[Rudiger]

I will acknowledge I'm bumping another old thread of mine, as well as one I was searching for in the General forum.

So I've had re-growth, over the past year, I know people have noticed, I've only had a few comments about it but nobody directly asking me what the f*** is going on. I can understand why I made this topic but the reality hasn't been anywhere near as bad as I thought it was.

The most memorable comment was in front of a group of people, with a good friend of mind who is outspoken but has a heart, I don't see him too often:

"I think h.l. has probably even improved his hairline"

And I responded by like clenching and pretending you can grow hair on the spot.

That's pretty much the best I could hope for, if that was the worst scenario and I'm not even offended by it.

I still of course am not happy with having a thin NW2.5, and am imagining how I'll cope with a hair transplant and what people's reaction to my "vanity" will be. I may make another topic about this.

And if anyone wants to tell me I'm being a whiny b**ch because they were NW8 when they were 14, just f*** off. Go to another thread, ignore my whiny bitchiness, and have a sh*t life.

 

[Rudiger]

Oh I have to mention that I have a cousin who was actually my godfather, and he's in his 40's now but has been bald since I've ever known of him (early 30's or even earlier) and he used to be very receptive to seeing me, really happy. Since my re-growth he barely says hello, I don't see him often but I get this impression he doesn't like what I've done, is somewhat full of contempt. Is that paranoid? I can't think of anything else that would set him off with me. I have to make quite an effort to get any chat out of him, and that wasn't the case at all when I was naturally balding, which I'm sure he noticed.

His 3 brothers are all NW1, and actually they're all fat and unattractive, but they've still got married and had kids. He on the other hand is still living with his parents and at this stage is seemingly accepting his fate as never having that in his life.

Maybe it is paranoia, or maybe he's one of us without knowing about it.