How my family found out I was bald

[Anthony83]

I am bored at work, so I thought I would share this brutally embarrassing story.

So going bald since college, I wore a hat all through university and then wore concealer once I graduated. Nobody, except my college roommate knew I was bald. My family all thought I had hair. About 8 months ago, I moved abroad and decided I didn't want to deal with Toppik anymore while I was traveling, so I buzzed it all off and am trying to accept it. Well about a month ago I went home to visit my family and I was determined the show them I am bald and get it over with!

Low and behold, I chickened out, and I wore a hat for the first 4 days...you think that would be obvious right?? I guess not. I was at a dinner on the 5th day with my entire family, aunts, uncles, parents, brothers, sisters, etc. I made the stupid, STUPID, mistake of joking with my sister about how she had a gray hair...

...The next part is in slow motion to me. I see her reaching for my hat to see if I have any gray hairs too, joking around and fun right? Not to a balding guy. I try to grab her hand to stop her, but I am not quick enough. She rips it off and then screams 'Whoa you're going bald!' At this point, my whole family looks over at me...my aunt gasps, loudly. My little brother screams 'Oh my God!' Everyone is looking.

I just sat there, bright red in the face I am sure, looking like a deer caught in headlights. After a few seconds, I grab my hat, put it back on, defeated, and try to change the subject. It was brutal and awkward. Oh, I forgot to mention, I made the mistake of sitting right underneath a very bright light in the restaurant, so I felt like the whole place could see every ounce of my baldness, in all of it's glory.

So now there is no more secret. My family knows, and now every person that I see who I haven't seen in a long time will know. I guess it had to happen sometime...I just wish it didn't happen so suddenly and awkwardly.

DON'T TOUCH A BALD MAN'S HAT!

 

[ali777]

I have one question. Why do you hide it from your family in the first place? I mean those are the people that are dearest and closest to you and they will support you no matter what.

I've told a few of my cousins about my concerns and stuff... To my surprise, one of my cousins that I didn't mention my concerns to jokingly said she would get me some "hair regrowth lotion" as a present. I expect to receive some minoxdil as an Xmas present :woot:

Another cousin was telling me that I can't be going bald because my dad has normal hair, etc... On a side not, my dad does have very nice hair.

Thanks for sharing, it makes an interesting reading... Hope you are over it and not taking it too seriously.

Have fun at work!!!

 

[Anthony83]

I have one question. Why do you hide it from your family in the first place? I mean those are the people that are dearest and closest to you and they will support you no matter what.

I've told a few of my cousins about my concerns and stuff... To my surprise, one of my cousins that I didn't mention my concerns to jokingly said she would get me some "hair regrowth lotion" as a present. I expect to receive some minoxdil as an Xmas present :woot:

Another cousin was telling me that I can't be going bald because my dad has normal hair, etc... On a side not, my dad does have very nice hair.

Thanks for sharing, it makes an interesting reading... Hope you are over it and not taking it too seriously.

Have fun at work!!!

Nah, I don't take it too seriously. My life is good, I just felt like sharing this story as I thought it was pretty brutal and entertaining.

I guess I hid it from my family because for some reason, I felt like I would be letting them down. My dad is a very good looking guy, used to be a body builder, has an amazing head of hair still. I have caught him making comments about bald people before. My younger brothers are both very good looking too, as I think I used to be before this started. For some reason I felt I was letting them down. I know they are all proud of me because I graduated and have a good job, but it is just something that I can't shake and I am embarrassed about.

One good thing that came of it...I have been noticing my little brother starting to thin the same way I did and I have ordered him some Propecia. I was able to talk to him about it since now we all know I'm going bald and he will probably in the future. So he will be more proactive than me and hopefully be able to delay it and keep his good head of hair.

 

[Hammer87]

What did you expect?

Of course they're going to be shocked. You hide something, then it pops up suddenly it will suprise people. You really should have just been open from the start, they're your family.

 

[Anthony83]

What did you expect?

Of course they're going to be shocked. You hide something, then it pops up suddenly it will suprise people. You really should have just been open from the start, they're your family.

Yeah, I was just delaying the inevitable. I was able to hide being bald for so long, it was hard to just show up bald one day. I hid it for 6 years! That's a tough thing to break.

 

[Hammer87]

I know, I don't blame you. I'm just saying you can see why they were shocked. It's not a case of 'OMG the shock is that you look so hideous!!'.

 

[Anthony83]

That's true...I hope! I didn't look at it that way.

 

[optimus prime]

lol...OMG! Nightmare situation.

 

[Fanjeera]

Never talk about hair, if you don't admit going bald. I always avoid the topic. How come a balder makes such a critical mistake :O? Always be on guard and think that you are losing hair! Never forget the state of your hair!

 

[Hammer87]

Never talk about hair, if you don't admit going bald. I always avoid the topic. How come a balder makes such a critical mistake :O? Always be on guard and think that you are losing hair! Never forget the state of your hair!

Agreed. If you're open about hair loss and can joke about it (The much healthier option in my opinion) you're free to comment on others hair, and even take the piss out of their hairstyles/balding/graying etc.

If you're not open about it and still do this, it's like you have absolutely no self awareness.

 

[Anthony83]

Never talk about hair, if you don't admit going bald. I always avoid the topic. How come a balder makes such a critical mistake :O? Always be on guard and think that you are losing hair! Never forget the state of your hair!

i know man, i slipped up. caught a hanger

 

[treeshrew]

what I am most impressed about is that you could keep your baldness a secret to your family, and to everyone (but your roommate) at college. did you wear a hat going to and from the shower? no one ever came in your room while you were sleeping in? you left it on during sports game national anthems? so many scenarios I'd think it would be hard to keep a secret as well as you say!

 

[BlahBlah12]

Yikes!
I was in a restaurant once with my friends and a bunch of girls..it was one of their birthdays. One of the girls asked how old the birthday boy was and my friend says something like "hes 22, i mean isnt it obvious by his hair?"
meaning his hair contradicted his age.

i felt really bad for the guy but he laughed it off. At least you were "outed" in front of a loving family!

 

[toocoolforhair]

In hair discussions I never admit I am going bald unless someone tells me I am. A few days ago a girl started telling me about how it was weird some men lost their hair early (she was referring to her brother). For some reason she didn't seem to realise that I am losing it too (it must be because of my short buzzcut). However, some people have pointed it out e.g. a friend said I should go to a fancy dress party as the Penguin (Batman Returns) because of my hairline.

 

[Anthony83]

what I am most impressed about is that you could keep your baldness a secret to your family, and to everyone (but your roommate) at college. did you wear a hat going to and from the shower? no one ever came in your room while you were sleeping in? you left it on during sports game national anthems? so many scenarios I'd think it would be hard to keep a secret as well as you say!

yeah, i am pretty shocked i made it last that long, too. in college, i used Toppik and wore hats a lot. i had a decent amount of hair then, so i could leave toppik in for more than a day and it would still look OK...even when i slept. i just avoided pools some girls would be like 'what the hell' when they would put their hands on my hair, but i just said i used some gel...

after college, i just put toppik in every morning and then it would last all day, i would do this every day. it got so damn annoying. i never went swimming and i always had an umbrella in case it rained. it worked amazing until the front starting receding badly and i couldnt pull it off anymore...that is why i buzzed it off. i am pretty happy i found toppik though, it kept me young for an extra 5 years or so. however, it may have contributed to me delaying the Big 3 that long also, but oh well!

 

[Anthony83]

In response to the OP, you are becoming aware of what being bald is all about. I think everybody has those "first moments" when others around them learn of their baldness. The family probably already knew, and were most likely just pretending they din't know you were balding. The girl who ripped the hat off knew also - it was her way of exposing your bald head.

It's good that now you are atleast adressing the issue rather than trying to hide it, cover it up, and pretend you are not balding - when you actually are. Hey, you should be thankful this happened in front of your family and not in front of your friends. They might not have been as comforting - they might have even made fun of you and "scarred you for life."

ha, i wish you were right, the sheer look of horror on my sister's face when she pulled my hat off, she was not expecting it...she is not that great of an actress. the looks on people faces, if they did know, they didn't know how bad it was. but you are right, it needed to be addressed, it was just a pain in the *** to conceal it anymore. i might just have a little scar, no biggie

 

[Anthony83]

In response to the OP, you are becoming aware of what being bald is all about. I think everybody has those "first moments" when others around them learn of their baldness. The family probably already knew, and were most likely just pretending they din't know you were balding. The girl who ripped the hat off knew also - it was her way of exposing your bald head.

It's good that now you are atleast adressing the issue rather than trying to hide it, cover it up, and pretend you are not balding - when you actually are. Hey, you should be thankful this happened in front of your family and not in front of your friends. They might not have been as comforting - they might have even made fun of you and "scarred you for life."

yeah, a similar thing happened to me, i was with 3 girls and they were talking about guys going bald, so obviously, i tensed up. then one of them was like 'youre lucky you have hair on your head, some guys arent so lucky.' i still dont know if she was just trying to make me feel better or she didnt notice...who knows, ill go with the latter

 

[ali777]

she is not that great of an actress.

In my experience, women are pretty bad at acting. Women tend to show their emotions very quickly...

The only two times they somehow get away with it is when they tell their boyfriends how many men they've slept with, and when they fake it...

yeah, a similar thing happened to me, i was with 3 girls and they were talking about guys going bald, so obviously, i tensed up. then one of them was like 'youre lucky you have hair on your head, some guys arent so lucky.' i still dont know if she was just trying to make me feel better or she didnt notice...who knows, ill go with the latter

One of my female friends was telling me how her boyfriend was feeling stressed about his hairloss, etc. So, I started explaining how male pattern baldness comes in stages. She looked and me and goes like: "Oh, I can see it now, you mean like your hair :sobbing: "

The thing is, for untrained eyes even NW3 is just mature hairline, but we all know it's just one stage before NW4 :freaked2:

 

[cleverusername]

I started losing hair in high school so my parents have been the only ones I've been able to confide in it. The rest of my family has never said anything about with which I'm grateful about. I'm sure they have said things to my parents but luckily I haven't heard any of it.

At least the worst is over for you now. It will feel good to not have to hide it the next time you see them. I have a friend who ALWAYS wears a hat. I've never seen him without it. He once made a comment to me "we white guys lose our hair early" because I had shaven my head that day just to see how it would look and we lived in Queens where we were the only 2 white guys in our circle of friends and really...the entire neighborhood. I have no idea how bad his hair loss is.

This was 4 years ago and we've lost touch because I moved overseas and upstate for awhile but I saw him last month, with a new hat on his way to his gf's job. SHE must know he's losing his hair. I can't imagine he wears it in bed so I don't understand why he just doesn't take the damn thing off but I'd never embarrass him about it because I know how it feels.

 

[elvis123]

I started losing hair in high school so my parents have been the only ones I've been able to confide in it. The rest of my family has never said anything about with which I'm grateful about. I'm sure they have said things to my parents but luckily I haven't heard any of it.

At least the worst is over for you now. It will feel good to not have to hide it the next time you see them. I have a friend who ALWAYS wears a hat. I've never seen him without it. He once made a comment to me "we white guys lose our hair early" because I had shaven my head that day just to see how it would look and we lived in Queens where we were the only 2 white guys in our circle of friends and really...the entire neighborhood. I have no idea how bad his hair loss is.

This was 4 years ago and we've lost touch because I moved overseas and upstate for awhile but I saw him last month, with a new hat on his way to his gf's job. SHE must know he's losing his hair. I can't imagine he wears it in bed so I don't understand why he just doesn't take the damn thing off but I'd never embarrass him about it because I know how it feels.

Hat prisoner somehow manages to keep something on his head even when he is f*****g his girl, ask him how he does it, haha