Okay to poke fun at baldness, but not fatness, zits, etc...

[mrsmith]

TWICE today, someone mentioned something about my hair loss. One was a friend who said "get your balding *** over" (party) and another was a younger cousin who said something about his dad being bald and that I was "going bald".


So... Why is it so pervasively accepted to RIB someone for losing their hair?

No one in real life (comedy sitcoms maybe) would Rib someone for:
(Especially to WOMEN!)

Being fat (unless it's recent beer belly). It's just not cool to call someone "fatty" or blobby.

Having bad complexion. When was the last time you told someone their face was turning into a pizza or pits and volcanos?

Face problems? Ever tell someone they must have lost their chin or grew a beak? Ever told a woman where she's going with those bags under her eyes?


Why is it okay to point out a man's baldness, but we spare people who have other types of inferior physical features?


I've already stopped whining, so spare me will ya.

 

[mrsmith]

Maybe we should just fire back with insults. Verbally attack your attackers worst features or vulnerable area.

 

[hairwegoagain]

Re: Okay to poke fun at baldness, but not fatness, zits, etc

TWICE today, someone mentioned something about my hair loss. One was a friend who said "get your balding *** over" (party) and another was a younger cousin who said something about his dad being bald and that I was "going bald".


So... Why is it so pervasively accepted to RIB someone for losing their hair?

No one in real life (comedy sitcoms maybe) would Rib someone for:
(Especially to WOMEN!)

Being fat (unless it's recent beer belly). It's just not cool to call someone "fatty" or blobby.

Having bad complexion. When was the last time you told someone their face was turning into a pizza or pits and volcanos?

Face problems? Ever tell someone they must have lost their chin or grew a beak? Ever told a woman where she's going with those bags under her eyes?


Why is it okay to point out a man's baldness, but we spare people who have other types of inferior physical features?


I've already stopped whining, so spare me will ya.

I know this is bothering you a lot - but the fact is that guys rib each other. Your pals probably know you're sensitive about your hair so it's an easy target for a little shop talk. Notice that they were inviting you somewhere - if male pattern baldness made you into a pariah it's doubtful you would be included.

You need to lighten up on this or you'll continue driving yourself crazy. From your last post, I know you're in turmoil and I'm sorry about that. However, you are the only one who can turn the boat around. Muster your strength, make your plans, and don't allow some petty remark from a buddy defeat you.

 

[Hans Gruber]

your so called friend clearly has his own issues,anyone who was truly happy with the way they looked wouldnt say something like that.

as for ya cousin ,you should have pointed out if it runs in the family then he'll be next,and because he drew attention to your baldness,you wont be going out of your way to let him know about effective treatments.........

or you could be the bigger man and not give a sh*t,and help them out when they both go bald and then theyll feel really guilty.

:hairy:

 

[hairhaircomeagain]

I guess its a part and parcel of life...
and franly I cant comment on anyone makin fun of baldies....About 7-8 yrs ago I used to be the leader of my pack when it came to making fun of baldies...I still smile when I think about that...Now I know what they mean when they say "getting a taste of your own medicine" or well "Tit for Tat".

Oh that reminds me...a week ago I was driving to work and this bald guy was crossing the road on the green signal...and I was like..."fuckin baldy" and then ofcourse it stuck me...HAHA..funny right....painfully funny

 

[mrsmith]

Thanks for the replies but still stop and think about and respond to, why it's okay to make baldness jokes while jokes about people's noses, complexion or fatness is NOT okay. Why is it more acceptable to jank on guys than it is on women?

Make a "fat" comment to a woman in your family or at work and you'll be outcast faster than sh*t is brown.

 

[Aplunk1]

I never poke fun of balding men anymore... Never.

I do, however, love to call women (to their face)... sl*ts, w****s, fat, b****s, ugly... etc. They love it.

 

[the_swami]

I go out of my way to not insult people with any kind of cosmetic (or other) injury or appearance issue. To my mind it really doesn't matter what your social norm is about this: I'd never think about insulting someone who had lost an arm or something, but pyschologically someone who has lost their hair could be in just as much trauma (seems odd but it can be true). For example, I once saw a video clip (PBS maybe) of some Japanese women who were losing their hair after Hiroshima (probably from the fallout killing their thyroid). They were pulling their hair out in handful and screaming, etc. Obviously it was just as traumatic to them as if they had lost an arm or something.


When some people open their mouths it really shows how little they actually give a fook about their fellow man. You have to feel a little sorry for people that go around making fun of others, the only reason they would do it is some type of insecurity on their own part. Really, that is the only reason. People who are really comfortable just being who they are just don't do crap like that, naturally, without an special effort; they just have less internal phobias, etc, and hence can relate to people better.

My two cents...

 

[baldguy28]

re:

I think that people like to mock baldness more than anything else because they know how important hair is in most cases to anyone's overall image and it is probably the most visible flaw that you can't really cover up other than acne. Most guys or women with all of their hair know that they have that "one up" on you so unfortunately when they are feeling insecure they will try to make themselves feel better by putting others down. I agree the the op that it's bullshit, it sucks and unfortunately to top things off, many bald/balding people are perceived as weak, insecure and less confident because hairloss doesn't look right and they will have many things manipulated around against them. I know because I've experienced this for the last several years (I'm 29 now).

To illustrate this I had an incident happen at work awhile back where a female co-worker who is overweight and constantly knocks short men (calls them little, short men even if they are average height) and bald/balding men made a comment one morning when I was having a bad day and I finally had enough. Though her comments weren't directed at me I felt that she was indirectly disrespecting me because she knew that I was sitting there and I'm shorter and going bald. So I responded to her "You're pretty overweight so you shouldn't be making fun of other people's flaws" It kind of froze her in her tracks and the next thing you know she ran into our boss' office (of course the boss is a woman who is overweight) and she sided with the woman saying that I should have just gone to my supervisor though I told her that I had to hear her jabs at men every day. She told me that my comments could be grounds for a workplace harrassment lawsuit and I told her not if I took offense to a comment that she said first. I'm tired of being told to "lighten up" or "be a man", I've put up with enough sh*t and the reason why most men hate hairloss is because women dislike it and we all want to have families some day and a wife who loves us for who we are and how we look. It's just human nature.

 

[mrsmith]

Re: re:

To illustrate this I had an incident happen at work awhile back where a female co-worker who is overweight and constantly knocks short men (calls them little, short men even if they are average height) and bald/balding men made a comment one morning when I was having a bad day and I finally had enough. Though her comments weren't directed at me I felt that she was indirectly disrespecting me because she knew that I was sitting there and I'm shorter and going bald. So I responded to her "You're pretty overweight so you shouldn't be making fun of other people's flaws" It kind of froze her in her tracks and the next thing you know she ran into our boss' office (of course the boss is a woman who is overweight) and she sided with the woman saying that I should have just gone to my supervisor though I told her that I had to hear her jabs at men every day. She told me that my comments could be grounds for a workplace harrassment lawsuit and I told her not if I took offense to a comment that she said first. I'm tired of being told to "lighten up" or "be a man", I've put up with enough $#iT and the reason why most men hate hairloss is because women dislike it and we all want to have families some day and a wife who loves us for who we are and how we look. It's just human nature.

That is just plain bullshit double standard feminist shite. Damn I'm sorry and hearing this account made me so frustrated. All you did was make a comment about "cleaning your own yard". It's now "okay" for a woman to be fat, but that fat b**ch isn't going to get much action.

We don't have to all be Vin Deisels. Jet Li is a good example of someone with a muscular, yet slender body. Let's take care of our bodies too. An army doesn't have to have everything in it's arsenal to win a few battles or even win a war.

 

[baldguy28]

The sad part is that there are many more men out there who will "settle for" or "accept" overweight women than there are women who will settle for short and/or bald/balding men. If you are a white guy and you are bald/balding and not at least 6' tall you may as well forget dating for the most part even if you get a tan. For some reason many women still seem to find bald Hispanic or black guys sexy or attractive but bald white guys are basically at the bottom of the pecking order.

 

[mrsmith]

I think we have a disadvantage, but we have NO choice but to work with what we have. I don't think white men are left out; we're just left out of trendy white styles (shaggy, emo, prep yuppy look, etc...) which I guess is suffered more by guys under 25.

Maintain an attractive well toned body. You don't have to be bulky; trim and muscular in a Brad Pitt, Jett Li form has more options for attraction than being "big" and meaty.

Dress well for your looks. Fashion helps show a sense of style, pride and dignity.

Be articulate, witty and personable. May not win the short race at the party or club, but you'll meet some very worthwhile intelligent and attractive women in academics or other places.

Sign up for Yoga classes once you are in decent shape, if you're not already in shape.

Play this like Chess or War.

Okay, we don't have air strike capabilities (hair) but we have other forces to use.

A headful of hair on a mediocre face, flabby body and lackluster style will always lose to smooth, well toned and articulate, but balding man.

 

[hairwegoagain]

If you are a white guy and you are bald/balding and not at least 6' tall you may as well forget dating for the most part even if you get a tan.

This is a huge crock of sh*t. Go ahead, let your mind keep you in jail...but don't be making a comment like that because it's simply not the case. If you're all introverted and reserved because you're obsessed with your hairloss, then yes - you probably won't do well, and rightly so. Pull up, my friend...and stop giving up so easily.

 

[souldoctor]

Yeah, I dunno why people take the piss out of bald guys so much...? I never did in the past, even when I didnt have male pattern baldness, I never even noticed it really or would have cared even if i did!!? I certainly didn't go round insulting people cos they were bald. It really pisses me off when my flatmate does it, he keeps constantly taking the piss out of bald people everywhere, pointing out bald sports stars on tv and calling them "bald motherfuckers" etc...

I guess it shows that my propecia is working cos he says all this around me, and seems to think that I don't have hairloss obviously....

 

[recboi]

Re: re:

The funny thing is that they can control their weight, if they really want to. There's nothing you can do about hairloss. You can't just say "I'm going to stop going to the gym and will eat only ice cream and cake and my hair is going to fall out"... SO they're holding against you something you have no control over. It's like making fun of someone for having any other genetic condition.

To illustrate this I had an incident happen at work awhile back where a female co-worker who is overweight and constantly knocks short men (calls them little, short men even if they are average height) and bald/balding men made a comment one morning when I was having a bad day and I finally had enough. Though her comments weren't directed at me I felt that she was indirectly disrespecting me because she knew that I was sitting there and I'm shorter and going bald. So I responded to her "You're pretty overweight so you shouldn't be making fun of other people's flaws" It kind of froze her in her tracks and the next thing you know she ran into our boss' office (of course the boss is a woman who is overweight) and she sided with the woman saying that I should have just gone to my supervisor though I told her that I had to hear her jabs at men every day. She told me that my comments could be grounds for a workplace harrassment lawsuit and I told her not if I took offense to a comment that she said first. I'm tired of being told to "lighten up" or "be a man", I've put up with enough $#iT and the reason why most men hate hairloss is because women dislike it and we all want to have families some day and a wife who loves us for who we are and how we look. It's just human nature.

That is just plain bullshit double standard feminist shite. Damn I'm sorry and hearing this account made me so frustrated. All you did was make a comment about "cleaning your own yard". It's now "okay" for a woman to be fat, but that fat b**** isn't going to get much action.

We don't have to all be Vin Deisels. Jet Li is a good example of someone with a muscular, yet slender body. Let's take care of our bodies too. An army doesn't have to have everything in it's arsenal to win a few battles or even win a war.

 

[recboi]

I know what you're saying is semi true, at least in Washington, DC. Check out this personal ad. It's very, very representative of what we have to deal with here, and I don't think they'll take too kindly to hairloss either, unless you have a lot of $$$ to compensate.

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/mld/ ... 39956.html

The sad part is that there are many more men out there who will "settle for" or "accept" overweight women than there are women who will settle for short and/or bald/balding men. If you are a white guy and you are bald/balding and not at least 6' tall you may as well forget dating for the most part even if you get a tan. For some reason many women still seem to find bald Hispanic or black guys sexy or attractive but bald white guys are basically at the bottom of the pecking order.

 

[CCS]

yeah, we point out that fat people can control their weight if they want to and bald people have genetics, but then they will turn that around on you and say, "that is why i'm more attractive than you. i can fix myself later if i want. you can't. no one wants to risk you passing your genes on to a kid, so that is another reason not to have sex with you. if someone has sex with me, they know the fatness will not be passed on."

it is just like a educated ugly woman putting down the intelligence of a good looking, constantly partying sorority girl, and she replies with 'i can get smarter later. you can't get prittier.'

it is not fair, but it is a good insult because it just points out who has it worse, not who has more character.

just because fat people choose to be fat does not mean they like being put down or won't put you down. and fat people outnumber bald people, especially at our age. also, many women gain 10 or 20 pounds in the winter and loose it in the spring, giving them some sags and stretch marks you can't see with their clothes on. and they hate getting turned down for dates when they are 20 pounds heavier and used to dating certain guys. rather than acknowledge their faults, they villify any guys who say anything about fat women. This is probably 50% of women fluctuating, not counting the other 20% who are chronically over weight. So if 20% of young balding men say anything about fat women, those 70% will angrilly argue back. the good news is the inshape ones you really want are not in this category. if they look inshape now and give you trouble for putting down the fat ones, that means they are really one of the fluctuators and will permanently balloon on you if you marry them and have kids. so just avoid those ones, keep going to the gym, and go for the less hateful ones.

 

[CCS]

if a guy on this site is bald and fat, he should not be blaming his dating short comings on his baldness. i think being bald drops your 1-10 appearance about 1.5 points if your head has an average shape, and about 0.5 points if you are one of 20% of guys with a good shape. So if the average 20 year old is a 7 and capable of being an 8.5 with every exercise, then he is back at 7 again after every other improvement he can make, and can still get a woman who is a 7. Men lucky enough to be born 9's will only drop to at worst 7.5 with baldness. getting a woman who is 1.5 points lower than what you should get is pretty annoying when you exercise and she does not, and you know if she did exercise she could get someone much better looking. but it is not the end of the world. a 7 is still not bad.

i'm not brad pitt cut, but i'm in just as good of shape as many of the guys i see daing hot women. I have 4pack abs and an above average chest and shoulders I've been building up. But I'm also only 5'8". I've seen plenty of guys my height or even shorter dating hot women. but all these guys had nice hair and my physique or better. I've also seen tall guys dating women I was not attracted to, and think it was because those tall guys were out of shape. to get a hot woman, you need two of three things; hair, physique, and height. well, to appeal to her sexually that is. i'm sure money will keep her by your side too, but that won't stop her from cheating.

a good way to predict if someone will cheat on you later if she seems to be settling for you sexually now. if someone just sees you as a raft until their next partner, they will cheat. if they see you as good now, then they can get attached, and are much less likely to leave you if someone a little better looking comes along. you just have to keep maintaining yourself. it is amazing how many people let themselves go and then get surprised when their lover does not love them any more. They live in a romantic fantasy world.

 

[porajj]

Actually, most fat chicks cannot control their weight. There becomes a point where they get so much body fat that it is impossible to work it off without surgery.

Granted, a 20 year old fat chick does have a chance of drastically reducing her amount of fat, but the ability to physically do so as to where its really drastic is more rare as they get older and is rare to begin with as well. Carrying a child produces extra poundage too, but those woman typically work it off back to where they were before they had a child.

Genetics is a massive part of weight. There are people who are built and meant to be 250+ consisting of a ton of fat. Attempting to retain 180 or something similar is nearly impossible. Chicks who are fat at 20+ will probably be fat/fatter at 25+ and its not because they "haven't made the choice yet".


IMO, Fatness > Hairloss. I would rather have a tall, thin, bald chick than some short, fat piggy with oodles of highlighted hair.


Get in real good shape and dont worry so much about the hair. If hair was this ultimate requirment for hawt chicks then no one in the Air Force, Army, or Navy would be getting some. There are tons of young pilots who are buzzed/bald/receeding that have no problem in the chick department.



If it still worries you to the point of insanity, just wear a beanie They look cool and no one is shocked if they take it off and find you bald.

 

[SuperBaldy]

You are wrong. When I was a teenager, I had major acne. I did all I could to stop it, tried every possible face wash available and even got medication for it, but nothing helped. Girls made comments about how my face was always full of zits etc.
I couldn't do anything about it, I had tried everything. I just had to accept it and learn not no care. I'm also a bit overweight, but people haven't commented much on it.

So, I guess people poke fun at almost everything, not only baldness. I kinda start to understand people who are depressed because of hair loss and are trying all the possible treatments. Thats basically the same thing I had with acne when I was younger, but baldness doesn't go away as you get older...

I've personally never really cared if someone's fat or who has a face full of pimples, but I've always poked fun at people with mental development problems, like Downs Syndrome and so. I know, I'm a big a**h**.