The most devastating thing about hair loss...

[wessneijder]

is knowing you will never have a chance with her:

Or any girls like her for that matter. 21 years old and my world is over

:sobbing: :sobbing: :sobbing:

 

[Ori83]

lol....right :gay:

 

[Aedan]

Not much must go on in "your world" then. I am sympathetic man cuz sometimes i do feel the same, i'm 21 too and rapidly balding.... im a slave to topik at the moment.

I must say tho, i've been working outside with the public over the easter holidays for long hours.... bit of an eye opener, you would not beleive the amount of bald guys i've seen hand in hand or linking onto incredible hot chicks.... no lie... the real world is very different from how some of you see it.

 

[Rawtashk]

False. Bald guy gets this girl

 

[s.a.f]

is knowing you will never have a chance with her:

Or any girls like her for that matter.

And neither will 90+% of NW1's.

 

[Vox]

And neither will 90+% of NW1's.

And there is more to it. I recognize that we are mammals and reproduce like mammals but, for the best or the worse, we are much more than this. In my mind, and I will shock many of you with what I will write, it is unconceivable to go to bed with such a (or whichever) girl without having first established a mental and emotional connection. I have like you the instinct but nothing is going to work without the appropriate background. Who tells me that she is not dumb, totally superficial, tactless, arrogant and so many more? Why freely offer the ultimate in this life, second only to our own health, without making sure it is worth offering?

This madness has to stop. The girls are like that for two main reasons: (1) they naturally bear the duty of making children, but this can be more easily taken care off under the current social and technological conditions in developed countries, and (2) it is a social phenomenon feeded by men's attitude. It is on part (2) that we should focus. We have to make them learn that nothing is free and that they also must try. This will make for a more balanced scheme in this life. The money analogy is not very good but it describes the idea: we should rather not blame someone who is over-payed, for what he does, but the one who pays him.

And one last thing. As a rule, people here forget that there are many (yep, many) men with heads full of hair but who look like... hmm. I would never trade my own for this. For the record, I remind you that I am 42, in the NW6+ range (not just balding like most here) and you can see my face in the end of this video.

 

[follicle84]

In my teens and early 20's i had a high standard of women. The fact is though i probably wouldnt have had a chance with any of those girls including the girl shown in the picture before i had hairloss. So if its any consolation dont beat yourself up over it. Few guys meet the expectations of those women bald or not bald.

 

[Pyro]

dude, what's her name. i am in love xD but in regard to your point, as someone else said, alot of guys with hair wouldn't even pull that banging hottie =D

 

[LooseItAll]

Oh come on stop belittling yourself and glorifying beutiful women. It's ridiculous.

 

[s.a.f]

And neither will 90+% of NW1's.

And there is more to it. I recognize that we are mammals and reproduce like mammals but, for the best or the worse, we are much more than this. In my mind, and I will shock many of you with what I will write, it is unconceivable to go to bed with such a (or whichever) girl without having first established a mental and emotional connection. I have like you the instinct but nothing is going to work without the appropriate background. Who tells me that she is not dumb, totally superficial, tactless, arrogant and so many more? Why freely offer the ultimate in this life, second only to our own health, without making sure it is worth offering?

This madness has to stop. The girls are like that for two main reasons: (1) they naturally bear the duty of making children, but this can be more easily taken care off under the current social and technological conditions in developed countries, and (2) it is a social phenomenon feeded by men's attitude. It is on part (2) that we should focus. We have to make them learn that nothing is free and that they also must try. This will make for a more balanced scheme in this life. The money analogy is not very good but it describes the idea: we should rather not blame someone who is over-payed, for what he does, but the one who pays him.

Not quite sure what you're trying to say here but its worth remembering that women will look first for attractive men and then try to find one who is compatible rather than looking for compatability first. I do agree with you though no matter how hot a woman is I could'nt have a relationship with someone who has nothing else to offer.

Prime example Kim Kardashian - looks like a goddess but is one of the worst examples of a woman.

[attachment=0:3pxy95ap]pretty-in-purple-dress.jpg[/attachment:3pxy95ap]

Evolution has for millions of years favoured those with purely the best physical attributes, I doubt we'll (the human race) be here long enough for that to change. And lets face it society is now more shallow and looks obsessed than ever before.

 

[Ori83]

And lets face it society is now more shallow and looks obsessed than ever before.

Sadly thats too true, for some reason my old folks doesnt agree. we live in completely different world than our parents, 100% different... and for the worse imo... but still some people posses old fashion behavior. usually the ones who get screwed mostly these days

 

[giggle]

dude, what's her name. i am in love xD

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louise_Cliffe

 

[kejan]

Losing hair is hard, I agree. In fact, it's shite. I'm 28 but started to notice my hairline and thinning at about 21.
I managed to conceal it fairly well for a few years through concealers and such but it got me down.

I don't agree with the sly motto of shave, tan and bulk up. Not everyone looks good with a shaved head, not everyone can build up muscle well, and tanning no good Doctor would advise patients to get out there and tan.

I'm blethering on, but you can still get attractive girls if you are bald or balding. Have a look outside and you'll see tons. Some will argue that they met those people before their balding took a serious grip. Yes, that could well be the case but there are a lot of balding/bald guys out there who ask out girls and still get dates, and with hot dates as well.

Then it'll be, I don't look good amazingly great bald but I'm doing well with women right now, much more than when I had hair and was better looking. I've always been pretty average looking and could do ok dating wise, but right now, I'm getting a lot of feedback from women and people saying I look nice. I know myself, I look older and less cute without the hair, so I have been trying to figure out why I've been getting more attention.
I have been shaving it recently, I had both compliments like being told I look like Kelly Slater or Zane (I take these as compliments anyways and also the not-so goodones like Billy Corgan or HIV patient.
9/10 the compliments are from women and the negatives are from men.

I'm more confident. When I was constantly hiding behind caps and throwing on toppik/dermatch, I was probably giving of all the wrong body signals. When I decided to not worry about it, I decided also that I was going to better myself. Become the best person that I can be. Be friendly, outgoing, chatty, and of course try to be funny and nice as well.

We can't control our hairloss or we can to an extent depending on your luck with topicals and such, but we can control who we want to be.

Not every woman will love a bald head and I'm not telling you to 'rock the sly look'.
I'm saying, try not to worry about hairloss as much, and keep living life and try to better yourself everyday. Read, exercise, get out there and meet people, do what you enjoy doing.
As cliched as it is, we only get one chance at this life. I wasted 3 years of my life deciding not to go to parties or bars on certain nights because it was too windy, rainy or I hadn't be given enough notice to get my hair ready.

Go out and live life.

 

[bigentries]

Nobody's glorifying beautiful women here. It's called a "reality check" for bald guys! :woot:

And "reality check" for the majority of people
America is what? 60% obese? how many of the rest would be considered "beautiful"?
The chances for the average male to end up with any girl that is considered model material are minimal.
After 30 (and for some people even before) hair or no hair the situation gets way worse

 

[LooseItAll]

Nobody's glorifying beautiful women here. It's called a "reality check" for bald guys! :woot:

And "reality check" for the majority of people
America is what? 60% obese? how many of the rest would be considered "beautiful"?
The chances for the average male to end up with any girl that is considered model material are minimal.
After 30 (and for some people even before) hair or no hair the situation gets way worse

Agreed. Adding baldness to the mix certainly doesn't help things for the most part.

Again, 99% of obese people CAN do something about their weight and become normal size if they put out enough effort. Bald men past NW3/4 have very limited options, if any - depending on the severity of their hairloss. Huge difference.

Actually the same thing applies to obesity. You can do something about it to a degree but once you are past a certain level things become difficult.

Remember that you need to do something about the extra skin tissue. Doing something actually means a surgery and a surgery leaves scars. Now it's not cool to have a scarred body.


I think the worst thing when it come to balding is that we are not educated about prevention techniques. So when the time comes many of us hairloss sufferers are already quite bald prior to starting any treatments.

 

[johnbbbb]

That's not totally true. Yes going bald sucks and I don't want to be bald. But I know a few bald/balding guys off the top of my head who have very attractive wives/girlfriends. The one thing they have in common is they're in shape, dress nice, are confident, and smile a lot. And I also know guys with a full head of hair who are 31 year old virigins because they're such depressing, dour people.

 

[Aedan]

excellent post blonde john....

nail hit on the head.

 

[kejan]

Great post, John.

I agree.

Of course there will be women who don't fancy bald men or balding men. Then there are women who don't fancy blonde men, or red haired men, or dark haired men. Everyone is different.

I have 2 friends. Both are 29 years old. One is NW4, thinning too, has a long-face, was even called Skelator for a while from He-man. The other friend is told often with his NW1 he looks like 'That guy from the Hangover' aka Bradley Cooper.

NW1 is pretty much a virgin and NW4 is no joke, literally sending the girls home. He is not a PUA, believe me, he is not a Jason Statham lookalike, what he has going is he's got personality. He's light-hearted, funny, easy to talk to, friendly, caring and can take the piss out of himself. He's a bit wild at times but in a fun way, spontineous, and isn't scared to say what he wants or feels. Of course not every single girl will fall for him, but he attracts his fair share of attractive women.

NW1 is often told that he's very handsome and loads of women enquire about him. But he's shy, he can't talk well with women, low confidence, if he walks into a room or a bar and the door opens and for example, a bar where people might look at the door to see who's coming through it, he'll put his head-down.
He struggles in the dating field and constantly beats himself up ''Who'll want me'' etc which drives us mad as he doesn't even know how handsome he is to women.

I'm not saying by any means, go slick, sly and get tanned.
Find a style that suits your hairloss, try concealers if you wish. Some NW3-4s with the right haircut can look good, short on the sides and some to play with up top.

Also, I'm not saying PUA or anything like that either. I still find that stuff hard to believe. Be yourself, but if you are struggling with confidence, talk about it, read books, listen to tapes, challenge yourself every day.

I was much better looking with more hair previously, I know that I was better looking with more hair, most of us are, a lucky few do look good shaved, and even smaller amount can look better with no hair at all!
I didn't have much luck on dates when I was younger, I could get dates but I just didn't know what to say to Women! I had no confidence in myself either.

Now, with my diffuse NW3.5 I´ve never done as good in my life.
It's all due to confidence.
I decided after going through the cap stage, the constant worrying of hairloss, that it was no way to live. I was a good enough person, I have qualities, and I need to get my confidence back.
I challenged myself to do things to boost it. Try talking to the attractive shop assistant, ok, it's hardly anything big, but just do it , think of something to say to her, she might respond, she might not, but it's a very safe social environment, if you are scared of shooting you down, you are not asking her out, but you are getting out there and minglin' with people.

Get out there and have some fun.
Don't what you feel looks best for you and your hair loss. Do that, but don't dwell on it. Take pictures if you wish, and look at re-search, but if for example, you use Rogaine, Concealer - once you´ve put them on, get out the door and go life live.
Don't worry about your hairloss.

Don't ever waste another minute of your life because of hairloss. I lost 2 years of hiding behind caps, staying in when it was raining, windy because I was scared my concealed hair and temples would be flapping about in the wind and I´d look awful. I missed spontanious fun, e.g last minute calls from friends - I wouldn´t go because I didn't have enough time to do my hair.

Sorry I'm going on, but some people on here are way too negative regarding hairloss. I am not saying it is not horrible, it's a complete pain in the arse and I'd love a NW1 but hairloss in a way has made me a better person, and encouraed me to be the best person and do as much as I can in life.

We only get one crack at the whip in life. So brace up and give it a good crack, within reason of course.

You will regret hiding behind hairloss for years to come, if you stay away from the spotlight.

 

[gascoigne]

is knowing you will never have a chance with her:

Or any girls like her for that matter.

And neither will 90+% of NW1's.

What a true! Bravo saf!

 

[gascoigne]

yea but seriously, she is unrealistically attractive. I honestly like the 7 to 9s more because they have personalities wayyyyyyy better and it's not like a mannequin or something.

That is big true friend. I like that category also, for same reasons.