An open letter to Uncomfortable man

[HatPrisoner91]

Unless your modeling baldness is irrelevant. (although i bet i could find some bald models if i try)

You can't just say that. Are you telling me that "good looking people" don't have an advantage in the workplace? You should see the people I see every day. They almost look like a clone of each other.

That's like me saying "unless you are playing basketball" your race has no bearing ever either. It's completely just stereotyping.

 

[GeminiX]

I only follow what you are doing. If my "bullshit responses" (as you put it) bother you, simply don't respond to them. We know you haven't made a valid point yet.

I'm not flattering myself at all. Look at how many of your posts are directed to me versus how many of mine are directed at you (subtracting responses of course). Point is that I don't agree or care about your point of view so I don't post to you unless it's in response to you talking TO ME. Get it? Got it? Good.

So wait, my claims are false? So are you telling me YOU know more about being a NW6 than I do? Are you telling me you know more about sales/advertising as well? Interesting, you must have ESP or something.

Here's an idea, don't respond to me. Simple. Goodbye.

I think I've made many valid points, whenever I reply to your ludicrous global statements I do my best to make sure I have my facts straight and as in the last post provide easy to verify evidence. I find that producing evidence makes my points far more valid than your approach of plucking stats out of the air such as your claim that "90 percent of the people in (sales and marketing) are young, good looking and all the guys have hair.".

Also, I think I've responded to two of your posts and you've responded to one of mine (initially that is), not sure how that validates your claim though feel free to run along and count them if it's that important to you. Maybe there are more, I'm not sure, had I known how important to you it was I might have paid more attention.

As for being more experienced than you at being bald and working in sales and marketing, well I have no idea what you do. My experience is based on a career arguably going back 27 years and being NW6 bald for many of those years. Over that time I regularly worked in and around sales and marketing teams and even working directly in sales myself for many years during a period when I was bald.

I'm living proof that not all sales people have hair, though I'm sure you'll stick to your guns; you don't have what it takes to ever admit when you're wrong.

As for ignoring your posts, well that goes both ways so feel free to ignore mine.

 

[Ori83]

GeminiX, your wasting your time its like arguing with a teenager.

 

[GeminiX]

GeminiX, your wasting your time its like arguing with a teenager.

I know, I even made a new years resolution to not waste time on people like this.

I'm just concerned that guys who are already feeling down about hair-loss will take his posts seriously and end up thinking there is no hope and he pushes them even further into depression. I don't think I've ever seen a post from him where he is not being totally negative or just trying to be offensive; kinda makes me wonder what his real motivation is.

 

[HatPrisoner91]

Waste time? Laughable.

You have yet to make a valid point. You obviously handled being a NW6 so well right? You are living your life as a bald MAN in a nice career with a nice life and not even worrying about hairloss or spending time in a hairloss forum, right?

Exactly. Thanks for playing.

 

[GeminiX]

Waste time? Laughable.

You have yet to make a valid point. You obviously handled being a NW6 so well right? You are living your life as a bald MAN in a nice career with a nice life and not even worrying about hairloss or spending time in a hairloss forum, right?

Exactly. Thanks for playing.

/shrug

I have no idea what point you think you're making, I've not been bald for quite a few years and my career is easy to verify with a search engine, I'm quite well known in my field.

You know the picture <------ over there is me right?

The reason I'm here (as I've told you on a number of occasions) is in the hope my experiences can benefit others, though I realise benevolence is an alien concept for you.

As an aside, when you try to be offensive by using MALE terms to address me you do realise that I'm not offended and it makes you look like an idiot right? Surely that fact that I'm so open about my life should indicate even to someone like you that I'm *not* ashamed of my past.

Also, while your attempts to be offensive because of my condition just brush off me, try to remember that I'm not the only transsexual on the forum.

 

[Cassin]

Alright...this open letter is closed. Cool down ok folks?

 

[Cassin]

Any chance we can open this up and now that everyone has cooled down?

 

[GeminiX]

I'm always calm

 

[Cassin]

:whistle:

 

[uncomfortable man]

GeminiX has lived life as not only a bald but also overweight man.... but his experience differs from ours HP because he had a strong support foundation from close friends combined with the fact that he is the way he is. This is not even factoring in his sexual identity issues which I believe are genetically based..... but she does have a right to post here since her past warrants it.

 

[s.a.f]

I guess when you find yourself in her situation losing your hair is a pretty minor hassle. The problem with many people is that hairloss is their only problem so they focus on it to an obsessive degree.
Not to say that its not a big issue because it can pretty much impact on every section of your life.

 

[uncomfortable man]

I guess when you find yourself in her situation losing your hair is a pretty minor hassle. The problem with many people is that hairloss is their only problem so they focus on it to an obsessive degree.
Not to say that its not a big issue because it can pretty much impact on every section of your life.

It's like that bald british journalist who summed it all up at the end when he said that baldness does adversely affect the way you look and consequently, the way others respond and treat you. So it is a problem in that sense.... is it the worst problem possible? No, but it is one that plucks directly at our sense of self worth and pride which can be a very tender nerve to pluck indeed.

 

[HatPrisoner91]

GeminiX has lived life as not only a bald but also overweight man.... but his experience differs from ours HP because he had a strong support foundation from close friends combined with the fact that he is the way he is. This is not even factoring in his sexual identity issues which I believe are genetically based..... but she does have a right to post here since her past warrants it.

I hear you man but my point was still valid. People who are not going through a specific situation preaching to those that are will always rub people the wrong way. I mean I don't have HIV. I don't go preach that people who have it should "get over it". The amount of people who are not bald who tell bald people to get over is beyond absurd.

My point to Gemini was that I was talking to someone else about how they chose to "call you out". And he decides to chime in on me (as usual).

And yeah Cassin, I've been calm the whole time. I post here a few times a month when I find the time.

 

[CaptainForehead]

The problem with many people is that hairloss is their only problem so they focus on it to an obsessive degree.

:agree:

I have many other insecurities way bigger than having gone NW6 at 22.
insufficient Intelligence, messed up teeth, being physically ungifted, being weak, socially awkward etc etc. Being bald .... not so important.

 

[gascoigne]

Deep down, we all have the same needs. Beyond food and water, there is the deep seeded need for love and acceptance (not just talking about sex) to feel whole as a human being. We are social creatures and as such have to compete for these resources just like any animal in the wild. Who gets all the resources (or at the very least, a disproportionate amount)? The dominant males. They get the food, they get the sex and more importantly...they get respect. Maybe we have evolved an inch or two since then but the primitive behavior is still the same. In this time and place that I exist in, my bald head puts me at a disadvantage to those dominant males for getting these said resources. Granted, it is not impossible but with the media brainwashing everyone that perfect=normal and that bald is bad and something to look down on, then that puts me at odds with achieving that very human need of just plain old acceptance by my fellow human beings. I just want to be normal, I just want to be accepted whatever that means. I shouldn't be afraid of failure, because by societies definition, I am a failure already.

There you go to my point!
DOMINANT MALE!!!
There are many men with hair, but most of them are not dominant!
Without your hair, you look just ok, AVERAGE!! And you surely attract ladies, just not the top class!
But speaking realistcly, you coulnt attract TOP class even with hair, couse they are amazingly picky.

 

[gascoigne]

Im not saying everything is set in stone. some ugly guys get with pretty girls and vice versa yes.

But bottom line, is ugly guys get with ugly girls and good looking guys get with good looking girls.

Why the f*ck do you think that just because you are 'confident' a girl will want you? she has to be attracted to the way you look.

If quasimido or the elephant man went out sarging on some bullshit pua mission they would probably be arrested for harresing people.

If your good at football - play footbal. If your good looking, go for girls, have everyone treat you nice and do better than ugly people also for free.

did you know that research shows that ugly people dont do as well as good looking people? did you know that parents treat better looking children better?

Life is suffering.

You got it man!
Thats the point about hair loss.
But zhe bottom line is, there are many guys with full hair, BUT ONLY FEW OF THEM ARE GREAT LOOKING!
You get me?

 

[gascoigne]

And yes sure, its harder for an uglier guy to get with a good looking girl and to be honest it is not about "confidence" alone, it is about playing the numbers game. If you are ugly as sin, I bet if you approached say 200 hot girls on a night out, and had confidence, at least one would want to sleep with you! I am no brad pitt but I have had attractive girls show me attention, and its purely down to the odds. Everyone has different preferences.

I hate to be such a pessimist, but "200 hot girls" is way too optimistic, IMHO.

I'd say more like 20,000. In other words, yeah it will probably eventually happen but there comes a time when a guy needs to learn his limitations, accept them, and move on.

I'll be blunt about this. A guy who is very ugly (I'm in this category, BTW) is NEVER going to score with a hot chick for all practical purposes (unless she is a prostitute).

I'm sorry, I've been down this road, and it just ain't gonna happen. BTW, I have gone out and approached literally thousands of hot women, and got rejected by 100% of them.

The guy would be MUCH better off lowering his standards to improve his odds. This gets back to what another previous poster has already said, "Good looking guys date good looking girls, ugly guys date ugly girls." That, of course, is a generalization and there are exceptions. But for the most part that general rule of thumb holds true.

When it comes down to it, a hot girl can have almost ANY guy they want, and they are approached many times per day. If they aren't "physically" attracted to a man (because the dude is just plain ugly) she will eventually lose interest and go with a more suitable (more handsome) guy.

Charm and wit, and character, confidence, etc...only goes so far, and hot women will eventually get bored with that, and seek other men that they are more sexually turned on by (physically) because they can get them.

Less attractive women will have to continue to settle for a guy not as handsome, because they cannot get another man very easily.

YOU ARE A F***** GENIUS!!!
So why didnt you agreed with my posts in recent topics?????

If guy is not so good looking, hair loss wont detorate his chances on market too much! HE can still get girls from his category!!!

 

[uncomfortable man]

But for many women hair is a prerequisite. You can't get a foot in the door without it. It's worse than a woman with a not so hot face but a sexy body that guys would still do. Women that casually overlook male pattern baldness are in a minority, but they exist. But for the most part baldness is a serious handicap when it comes to dating. And while it is true that the ultimate outcome is partially in our hands with how we play the cards dealt, we are at a distinct disadvantage none the less.

 

[GeminiX]

But for many women hair is a prerequisite. You can't get a foot in the door without it. It's worse than a woman with a not so hot face but a sexy body that guys would still do. Women that casually overlook male pattern baldness are in a minority, but they exist. But for the most part baldness is a serious handicap when it comes to dating. And while it is true that the ultimate outcome is partially in our hands with how we play the cards dealt, we are at a distinct disadvantage none the less.

Do you not think though that there are countless disadvantages and hang-ups we have and hair-loss is just one of them?

Pretty much every single person I know has something they are not happy with regarding themselves and wish they "had it like that other guy", the grass it seems is always greener next door.