Another Lonely Christmas & New Year Holiday Season For The Baldies.
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shookwun
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What bugs me is that I have zero friends, women and family in my life where I am. All though I choose to be single due to the fact that my self esteem is at an all time zero at the moment, I find it hard to even muster enough energy to want to go out. it's gotten to the point where I rather be at home alone, despite a women inviting me over tomorrow for x mas dinner, and drinks
Being isolated in your own mind, and having no fun nights out is what gets to me.
When I used to live back home, and had lot's of people in my life it never bugged me if I didn't have a girlfriend because I was so busy with people in my life all the time. It's when you have nobody in your life do you realise how much being alone sucks.
I thought about this today. How much of my life has been a fog ever since I came out west compared to back home in the big city.
Lonliness is much more in depth then not having a partner. What realy gets to me is having absolutely NOBODY in my life that makes it hard to deal with sometimes. Stack that with hair loss, low self-esteem and you have a huge depression cocktail. Again, when I was back home i was never depressed because I always had friends in my life, and was always doing some form of activity.
What bugs me is that I have zero friends, women and family in my life where I am. All though I choose to be single due to the fact that my self esteem is at an all time zero at the moment, I find it hard to even muster enough energy to want to go out. it's gotten to the point where I rather be at home alone, despite a women inviting me over tomorrow for x mas dinner, and drinks
Being isolated in your own mind, and having no fun nights out is what gets to me.
When I used to live back home, and had lot's of people in my life it never bugged me if I didn't have a girlfriend because I was so busy with people in my life all the time. It's when you have nobody in your life do you realise how much being alone sucks.
I thought about this today. How much of my life has been a fog ever since I came out west compared to back home in the big city.
Lonliness is much more in depth then not having a partner. What realy gets to me is having absolutely NOBODY in my life that makes it hard to deal with sometimes. Stack that with hair loss, low self-esteem and you have a huge depression cocktail. Again, when I was back home i was never depressed because I always had friends in my life, and was always doing some form of activity.
Then go home, save enough money to buy property where you want live with mortgage repayments you can afford on a lower paid job.
hanginginthewire
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I was surrounded by people this evening, but still feel like hell. Even if there were a cure tomorrow I think I'd still have sadness. Experiencing the isolation, depression, and frustration of hair loss changes you. It's becoming more and more acknowledged that PTSD can occur due to all kinds of stressors (not just something as egregious as war, which yes, I of course acknowledge is way worse).
Anyway yeah, happy f*****g holidays.
Anyway yeah, happy f*****g holidays.
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It will work for you. You've already got success in the business world. It's gonna happen, I know it!
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Luckily I have my dog and that's more than enough. I could go completely bald tomorrow and he wouldn't even notice.
My dog passed away, in his sleep, on our bed. 12/12/2016. 12 years old to.
He was "my dog". Followed me everywhere.
Knew he was dead. He was looking at me in the eyes (in the morning). Had to lift
him on the bed. (Usually he jumps. He's short (1 foot tall). Heard loud snoring at night.
Other dog is almost 16. And we have a puppy as well!
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I'm sorry for your loss.
Dogs are awesome. They never judge you even when your hair is in tatters and your self esteem is in the gutter.
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My hair's in the drain!!!
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f***. sorry man. I've been through that a couple times. it's very heartbreaking. hope you have a good holiday.
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wait... someone GAVE you these things?? if so, I would choke them with one hand and repeatedly punch them in the face with the other, despite baby Jesus's birthday. Amen.
shookwun
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I guarantee most of the people dont even know, and understand what true loneliness is.
As I said earlier, when you have family, and friends into your lives it's very easy to live a happy life, even without a partner. Granted having a women in your life is great, it won't bug you as much as being alone without NOBODY.
I doubt anyone in here even knows what it's like to be truly alone.
Live my life, and that is being truly alone. Very few would be able to handle on top of being depressed about there aesthetics. I was surprisingly happy when I had lot's of people involved in my life, even when I had hair problems prior to my transplants. Being around others constantly, talking and going out helps enormously. The moment you start living in your own mind, and having little exposure to others that care about you, is when you will start to understand what it's like to be alone.
Ever notice how just talking to someone at the gym, work or grocery store tends to make you feel happy, and wanted?
CaptainForehead
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I spent this weekend alone. No work colleagues, nobody. Last time I spoke to someone was on Friday at work.
Fortunately loneliness doesn't really bother me most days. I guess you get used to it. I only feel it when I'm sick, or need help with something (like moving).
Fortunately loneliness doesn't really bother me most days. I guess you get used to it. I only feel it when I'm sick, or need help with something (like moving).
I'm ugly, so no.
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Of course, and nearly every person would crack up if they did.
I've distanced myself from others just recently, it's very temporary but I felt necessary. I realise just how imbalanced I am when I can't spend even a single evening completely by myself, engaging in anything, a film, reading, nope, I need a social distraction, I'm still on my phone, I met friends yesterday and will do again tomorrow - as well as spending most of my day with family.
So that's not even true loneliness, even being on the phone isn't true loneliness, and I'm still cracking up. Luckily right now I am no longer on the verge of panic attack, but a few hours ago I was upside down, and it's really made me think about loneliness and myself, and how I may need to completely re-structure everything about me, my values and narcissism, that for 99% of us social interactions are only fulfilling in a selfish way, to feel funny, interesting, loved, and showing our interest in others is mainly to get that attention back.
The only thing I can really cling to is that I have some form of self-awareness, that most people will never stop to understand how inherently flawed and fucked up we all are. Not to say that there isn't some sliver of genuine need to care for others and for their well-being, but the fact is that a large chunk of this need is to get something back from that exchange, as animals, albeit social animals, we're hard wired for that greed.
I'm only relieved somewhat because I'm excited at the idea that I can really, truly change myself, and fix the imbalances that I previously thought would plague me until death, that getting out of your own brain is impossible.
f***, I haven't even been drinking... yet.
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I don't want to patronise you by saying that's sad, but at least the fact you cope with it better than most, is a silver lining.
Loneliness is only beginning to become realised as a major cause of issues and depression in society, but it's still not being dealt with. What are the solutions? Join a club, go to your local community centre, I mean f***. That doesn't "fix" things it just masks a problem that people can't deal with themselves so they need the constant diversion of others.
Well OK, for plenty of people getting out in the world will help, but this doesn't sound like a solution for you at this point. So it really is great you can deal with it, and on days when you aren't quite feeling as adjusted, I'd say to look at where the problems lay within yourself and as I was writing in my post before, if there is the possibility to re-structure your strength as a human, and what makes you feel bothered by simply being alone.
It just shouldn't be f*****g normal for 99% of humans to not be able to sit in the company of their own damn brains.
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Your probably just someone who is very extraverted. Your brain is wired like this. Hard to change this brah, if not impossible.
Contrary to you I can easily sit in the company of my own brain. I highly doubt if I'm 1% of the population though.
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Sorry, I actually meant 99% of people would crack up if experiencing true loneliness, as in an extended period of time of people rarely being there for them in any form, and most importantly knowing that this is their fate. It's been linked to lots of health problems, obviously mental health but even physical as well.
I realise a lot of people can easily cope with an evening alone, or even every evening as long as they see people during the day, but being completely closed off and knowing that it will stay that way, if you can cope with that fine then I'd say you're a rare person. 1% maybe a bit dramatic but I'd say it's close to 1% than like, 50% or something.
With regards to simply being extroverted, I just don't think it's as straight forward as that and it contradicts elements of my personality.
I think you should be more open minded/optimistic about the possibility for people to change largely how they are, if people can change without even being aware of it or attempting to, of course they can also change while being conscious of the fact (although it obviously takes a lot of time and effort).
EDIT: Oh wait I was actually talking about how 99% of people's social interactions are based on getting back what they put in, and yeah, a bit dramatic but I feel a lot of people, myself included, behave on this basis.
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This just explained to me a lot more why I struggle to not be regularly active socially, it's like I have ADHD, and now seeing these simple words are putting that into perspective how it's actually gotten worse as I've got older. I used to read and listen to a LOT of music, now it is never, I can't even listen to music really. Going for a walk is unimaginable, regularly at least, I'd lose it after 3mins and start my interval running.
I need to get back to dedicating myself to yoga, which I actually enjoyed and really did help my focus for the brief period I did it regularly. Meditation may be bridge too far right now but in my opinion isn't too far off.
If anyone can pay attention to reading or listening to music for more than 10mins, cherish your gift (which you may not be aware of).