Dont feel confident amongst people anymore

[mpbsux20]

I am 20 and I am clearly a norwood 2.5....Although I workout and have a decent physique I feel I am too old to be even talking to people of my age...Ever since I noticed my hairline receding,I have grown my hair long and covered my hairline but sooner or later it will become obvious that I am losing it.I have already noticed a lot of people laughing at my ridiculous hair.I cant even comb my hair in public and whenver I pull my hair back people have that "This guy is balding" look on their faces.Folks younger than me by a couple of years or even of the same age think I am much older than them.When my hair is all washed and when I am at home with my temples neatly covered,it looks quite fine but as soon as I step outside my hair gets messy and looks like a bad hairpiece in no time.Also I sweat a lot and my receded right temple gets exposed whenever I exercise so to combat this I always wear a beanie whenever I workout.I have become physically fit and I am in the best shape of my life but people still dont find me attractive just because I have a pathetic head of hair.

Everyday when I wake up I pray that I dont have a bad hair day but slowly everyday is becoming one.I performed miserably in school because of this son of a b***h and my life at the uni has also been terrible.So far my performance has been average-below average and when I get out in a year I will probably end up with an average job.I used to be quite interested in education when I was in junior high but slowly lost interest.I dont know what I am going to do with my life.I have nobody to share this with...I just cant make friends and I have tried every trick in the book....This has even affected my relationship with my elder brother because I have been totally lazy and depressed for the last 4 years.Only my mum seems to understand the pain that I am in...I hate myself and my genetics cause I have plenty of body and facial hair which makes me look even older than what I am...People around me who are of my age seem to be really enjoying themselves,partying and getting plenty of pussy whereas here I am sittin at home watching movies all the time to divert my attention from my condition.I do feel happy at times being alone cause I dont have to put up with comments from some moron about my appearance.I have a pretty good face and skin but my hairline totally takes away all the positives I've got.

I know its not correct to be alone but I am getting used to it and already my own relatives including my dad think that I am grouchy.The best years of my life are getting wasted and I am not able to do a damn thing about it.Once it becomes clear that I am bald,I would never have the confidence to even talk to people.I am trying to save as much money as I can so that by the time I am bald,I can just stay alone all by myself.Deep down I am a nice person.Unfortunate for me I am not able to express myself due to various shortcomings I have had in life and male pattern baldness being the top on my list.

I feel sorry for people going through the same torture as me but I have never managed to meet somebody like me.The people with male pattern baldness that I meet are either much too older than me or are totally bald or rich folks who dont give a damn about this.My heart goes out for all of those suffering from this wretched curse especially the ones in their teens and twenties.

I cant pull off the shaved look as I dont have the rightly shaped head for it and I certainly dont want to at the moment. Inside I am still a 20 year old who just wants to live like any other twenty year old.I would have been able to handle this in my thirties or forties.People look at me as a mature individual and expect me to act like a 30 year old.I feel uncomfortable wearing t-shirts too,not that I am a gorilla or something but for a person of my age I have quite a lot of body hair.I really dont mind having body hair as long as I have a thick head of hair but nothing can be done about it.I just have to accept I am old although I am not and would have looked attractive had it not been for this curse.

 

[Smooth]

Ok, a blitz-commet because i have to split!!

First, i can relate to everything you just wrote,and i know how suck it is at uni, i went throw the same sh*t...
- youll get throw and once you get to mid twenties thing start to change (pussy-wise).
Second, you look good! (no-gay) get on meds and try to stop the process, you still have a good amount of hair (althoug YOU ARE losing it!!! ) dont let it slide in your watch! get on meds asap - save whatever you can.... as for body-hair... well you can get it removed (CCS is an expert on the matter)
GL and hand on there buddy, you have this forum to share thoughts, rant and get info - use it ;P

Smooth - out ;D

 

[mpbsux20]

Thanks for your comments mate.....I do try and stay positive but I lose interest just because I am not good at anything so far in life...I lack motivation ever since this whole thing began...

PS:Can anyone tell me how long will it take for me to progress to the next norwood level without meds ?

 

[s.a.f]

Even though you've blatantly combed it to show your (recession) I have to say that to me it does'nt look anything out of the ordinary, it certainly did'nt stand out as obvious to me. You look like a typical young man and are you even aware that this could just be a mature hairline and might stay like that and not get any worse, especially if you try finasteride.
Try a shorter haircut it may look better.
I think its some other issue that is making you think the way you do and is keeping you down, either BDD or some confidence issue.
BTW I was there at your age and my advice is to try and break this cycle dont get to 30+ and regret it because by then it may be too late.

 

[mpbsux20]

Initially I thought it was a mature hairline too but I reached a point where I could no longer go to the barber shop as I started getting comments like "Your hair is getting thinner","You have a rather large forehead","If I cut your hair short it wont look good",etc: Of course I was affected by all these comments but I decided not to give a rat's a$$ about all this.Every morning when I looked at my hairline in the mirror,I felt sick.For the last couple of years or so,the hairline has stayed the same but the overall thickness has come down steadily.It has become stable since last year after I started taking Vitamin supplements.

I consulted two dermatologists and they confirmed my worst nightmare that it was indeed male pattern baldness and I was prescribed Minoxidil.At that moment I really felt like snuffing it right there....I experienced some sides using minoxidil and I couldn't even style my hair!! I went nuts and threw it down the garbage chute as applying it kept reminding me that I was balding.I dont mind trying finasteride in the near future....You are right may be I wouldn't feel so bad if I taste some sort of success in life.People respect you only if you have money and power and I dont have both...

 

[Thickandthin]

Your hair looks fine. The longer hair makes recession look worse, BTW.

A good haircut for NW2-3 is a #7/8 guard in the back and sides, and the top about 1.5-2 inches long. If the back and sides grow out, they get too heavy and their thickness will contrast with the lower density of the top and front - so leave the top longer, and the very front a little longer still. Enough to have a short fringe to cover the temples and style but not long enough to get blown away in a strong wind.

With good styling you can have great hair, because the rest of your hair is still very very thick. You just have to pick cuts that are flattering to your hairline.

 

[Nuli]

Hey man everything you said relates exactly to me. Im 19 and it sucks having to deal with this sh*t when these years are supposed to be our best. I also spend most of my time alone, as I can't stand being around other people my age when their only problem in life are their relationships. They take so much for granted it blows my mind, if they only knew what it feels like to wake up everyday and feel uglier and uglier has more of your hair falls out. and theres NOTHING you can do about it.


Honestly though, your hair isn't that bad. Its still very thick and you only have a receded hairline, which some women like as it makes you look more mature and alpha.

 

[mpbsux20]

Thanks to both of you for your comments
@thickandthin:Thats exactly what I do whenever I do get my hair cut.Even when my hair was thicker,it was sensitive to wind but atleast my left temple was completely filled and I didn't have to take a parting in the middle.Also the hair seems to grow a lot slower.I have been growing my hair nearly for a year and had the split ends trimmed only thrice during that period.

@Nuli:What irritates me the most is that people judge you merely by the way your hair looks...I have tried my best to wear good clothes and stand out from the rest but I still feel I dont stand a chance competing with guys with a full head of hair.May be older women wont be as shallow and one sided as girls of my age group.But I haven't considered taking that extreme step yet.The other day,I saw an old fella at the health club who would have easily been 60 years old..He had thicker,stronger and longer hair than me.He kept on pulling his hair back just to tease me.He showed absolutely no signs of even a receding hairline and would be a Norwood 0 in my books.It was so thick I felt like pouring gasoline on it and totally burning it.I just ignored the guy by telling myself that he was probably jealous of my youth.So far balding and bald relatives have been nice and kind to me but I have lost touch with all of them recently and feel awkward to talk to them about this matter.Apart from my brother,mum and dad,nobody else know I have male pattern baldness as I have long hair but many already feel that my hair doesn't look as good as it used to.

 

[uncomfortable man]

Str8 trippin. :whistle:

 

[toocoolforhair]

People with dark skin usually suit buzzed/shaved heads the most so there is always that option.

 

[Odie]

Dude I know it's a sensitive subject but ina ll honesty you are looking good. Your hairline has matured but it still looks good.

If I were you I'd get a shorter cut and style it with wax - get the messy-choppy look going on. I have receded temples and some thinning and my hair looks way better short and styled than long.

Girls appreciate the styled look more too

 

[s.a.f]

I dont mind trying finasteride in the near future....You are right may be I wouldn't feel so bad if I taste some sort of success in life.People respect you only if you have money and power and I dont have both...

finasteride is the best bet to stop it from getting worse. But it seems to me that you are only making your problems worse, you need to try and get out there and mix with people.
Listen people with money and power dont have everything sure thats great to have but trust me there are plenty of rich powerful people who have unsatisfactory lives, no real freinds ect. Look around you how many rich and powerful people do you see? - Not many if you get out there and mix with people you'll see that everyone has their problems and issues.
You have to get out there and fill your life with other stuff thanworrying about hairloss, dont end up like me I see plenty of guys with hairloss who get on with life get married and enjoy themselves.

 

[mpbsux20]

Some of those pics have been taken under poor lighting.Also those pics were taken using my phone which doesn't have a great camera[just 2.0 MPXLS].In reality.If I cut it short,it looks like Timothy Olyphant's hairline:
http://images.starpulse.com/pictures/20 ... 029937.jpg

The last time I had it cut real short was when I was about 18 and my hair looked like Justin Theroux's.
http://www.tinsleytransfers.com/celebs/ ... heroux.jpg

Many of you might think its not too bad but that guy is almost 40yrs old and must have had easily a few hair transplants.In another 10 years may be I would end up looking like old jacko:

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_EXopv5BJbnY/S ... olson2.jpg

It might even look as bad as Jude Law's if I cut it short now:
http://deceiver.com/wp-content/uploads/ ... de-law.jpg
http://media.photobucket.com/image/Jude ... 257644.jpg

For a person of my age that is quite difficult to accept.I have not quit yet and will wait for another year or two to see if things get better with meds.

 

[mpbsux20]

I dont mind trying finasteride in the near future....You are right may be I wouldn't feel so bad if I taste some sort of success in life.People respect you only if you have money and power and I dont have both...

finasteride is the best bet to stop it from getting worse. But it seems to me that you are only making your problems worse, you need to try and get out there and mix with people.
Listen people with money and power dont have everything sure thats great to have but trust me there are plenty of rich powerful people who have unsatisfactory lives, no real freinds ect. Look around you how many rich and powerful people do you see? - Not many if you get out there and mix with people you'll see that everyone has their problems and issues.
You have to get out there and fill your life with other stuff thanworrying about hairloss, dont end up like me I see plenty of guys with hairloss who get on with life get married and enjoy themselves.

I totally agree with you but it is hard to come to terms with something like this when you are about 16 years old.I find it extremely difficult to stay and act confident consistently.

 

[Hope4hairRedux]

To the OP;

First of, when I was reading your post, I assumed that your hair loss was going to be really bad. When I saw your pics, I was suprised. Your Hair looks cool as it is, yes slight recession on the sides, but it still looks pretty damn thick. Your darker skin also means that hair loss wont look as bad on you as it will on a whitey like me.

I didnt see your whole face, but you appear to be fairly good looking. Girls really wont look at that and be like 'no Im not going with him because he has lost some hair' - Yeah, they may notice, but I really dont think they will care. It blends in all quite well, and the contrast between your hair and skin isnt big.

Girls dont have set criteria for what a man should like. Well obvoiusly they probably have ideals, but girls, and both sexes generally find all types of people attractive, you get attractive bald people, you get ugly NW1.s. The bottom line is that you have to work on other areas.

Also, would a girl rather go out with a miserable depressed NW1, or a happy and confident bald guy, if say hypothetically that they were both average looking? Its pretty obvoius that people would mostly want to be with someone with a great outlook on life rather then someone with a perfect head of hair.

It just goes to show that your outlook and attitude to your situation is the most important.

Many people on this site would probably disagree with me, but I am against taking any forms of the current 'treatments' for hair loss. They simply dont work. They may slow it for a few years, but you get sh*t side effects, spend a lot of money, and it only increases your misery and obsession. The only way through is to accept the inevitable. Just let nature take its course, adapt to it.

In the long run, the only way you can become happier and confident is to change your attitude, surrender and go with it, this is the only way though.

Victor Frankl - “When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves.â€￾

 

[Hope4hairRedux]

To the OP;

First of, when I was reading your post, I assumed that your hair loss was going to be really bad. When I saw your pics, I was suprised. Your Hair looks cool as it is, yes slight recession on the sides, but it still looks pretty damn thick. Your darker skin also means that hair loss wont look as bad on you as it will on a whitey like me.

I didnt see your whole face, but you appear to be fairly good looking. Girls really wont look at that and be like 'no Im not going with him because he has lost some hair' - Yeah, they may notice, but I really dont think they will care. It blends in all quite well, and the contrast between your hair and skin isnt big.

Girls dont have set criteria for what a man should like. Well obvoiusly they probably have ideals, but girls, and both sexes generally find all types of people attractive, you get attractive bald people, you get ugly NW1.s. The bottom line is that you have to work on other areas.

Also, would a girl rather go out with a miserable depressed NW1, or a happy and confident bald guy, if say hypothetically that they were both average looking? Its pretty obvoius that people would mostly want to be with someone with a great outlook on life rather then someone with a perfect head of hair.

It just goes to show that your outlook and attitude to your situation is the most important. Everyone wants to be around positive, funny and confident people, so if you can try and let your own personality come through, then people will like you for who you are, no matter what.

Many people on this site would probably disagree with me, but I am against taking any forms of the current 'treatments' for hair loss. They simply dont work. They may slow it for a few years, but you get sh*t side effects, spend a lot of money, and it only increases your misery and obsession. The only way through is to accept the inevitable. Just let nature take its course, adapt to it.

In the long run, the only way you can become happier and confident is to change your attitude, surrender and go with it, this is the only way though.

Victor Frankl - “When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves.â€￾

(I will concede that it does seem that guys in America have it hard. Over here girls dont seem as bitchy. Baldness is an issue in that it obvously can detract from ones looks - but its not really seen as pathetic or terrible here, its quite accepted and normal) Im not sure if American guys make out like they get victmised a lot of whether its true..)

 

[treeshrew]

hey man, you are very typical of someone who comes to this forum for the first time. completely freaking out that "life is over" but only showing minimal hair loss. yes, you are receding, but like you said, it's hardly noticeable in the right conditions.

you need to calm down and read some stories about people who really are balding, and realize that to most people, you still do have a "full head of hair". not to mention a combination of finasteride+minoxidil can completely stop further loss. when i first came here freaking out like you i had pretty minimal hair loss too, i started on finasteride+minoxidil, it's been almost 2 years, and it has completely stopped my hair loss. we are so lucky to have treatments like this today (i am 27 by the way).

also - who says 20s are the best time of your life? getting hammered at parties? i'm looking forward to my 30s. a lot of 20s-aged girls are really attracted to older men. most of the 20 somethings i talk to say their cutoff is late 30s, so dude, you got plenty of good years ahead of you.

you've got way too much hair to be moping around!

 

[mpbsux20]

Actually I feel a whole lot better now than I did for the last few days.Lucky for me I can grow a thick full beard in just 10 days and its growing even quicker due to all the vitamins I've been taking.With the beard the receded hairline doesn't look all that bad and it sorta looks gnarly too....Kinda gives me the cave man look that Jack Black had in Year One. unk:

Also I worked out really hard at the health club today and this made feel a lot more positive.The thing is I am not able to maintain this frame of mind and I have the tendency to soon get back to square one when I have bad hair days.

 

[captain_que]

Oh man it´s easy to relate to what you´re saying. But honestly, your hair doesn´t look that bad at all! Trust me.. You still have thick hair! I had hair like yours for years before I started thinning, and I would kill to get back to that point.
I´m with whoever said that you should get a shorter haircut and perhaps style it.. The longer hair makes it more obvious for sure..

It doesn´t look bad at all. I´m sure you can still get away with a lot of different hairstyles. We all get this once in a while that nothing but hair matters and all, but what it comes down to is how big a deal you make it. If you let it affect you too much, it affects how you act and you send out vibes that don´t attract the ladies..

 

[cuebald]

You are not bald or even balding to the majority of the population.

Only fellow baldies would recognise the fact that you're a Norwood 2.5 at the most.

I do though understand how it is to feel inferior, especially when everyone else around you is a NW1 with thick hair.

People I know at 24 years old still have thick black straight hair or curly blonde hair, smooth skin and barely look 18. Others aren't so lucky, with baldness and a haggard old look.

There has to be a reason why this is so. Maybe it is just all down to genes? :dunno: