Yes, but your self esteem is the real reason you are still stuck in this vortex. The attention and validation is nice but then eventually it becomes an addiction. The only way through redemption is to actually help others avoid the same mistakes you either still keep making or already have made. And I guess, you claimed you were going to leave this forum if that girl gave you more attention. I guess we already know now how it worked out for you. I just hope you finally leave this place and focus on your education and future. Otherwise, you might get to that point of no return.