No more than 2300, magic number. It doesn't matter if a few 100 extra here and there occasionally as you need a surplus of 3500 calories to put on a lb of fat/muscle - so it's more about a life change. You can calculate this figure as I'm sure you know based on height, age, exercise per week e.t.c.
We've talked a bit on PM before with your old account too, what you say is totally right but I was mainly talking about health benefits which are significant and life long. This section is for venting so if you feel like ever writing your story, it's not a problem. Anyway, you're spot on it's all face (with good hair) for spontaneous genuine attraction with everything else being a bonus. With a good face, everything else can be just "normal" and it's fine.
The thing is though it also depends on the type of girl and age group. Plus 23 educated/creative girls will be happy with an attractive face (nice hair) and rest of you looking "normal" even though they will also appreciate a good body. But the "superficial" appearing type of girls who are into cosmetics (obsessive about tan, make up, hair colour, tattoos, lip fillers, posing) will also look at the rest of you even if they are attracted to your face and you already. You can spot them a mile away. They will put emphasis on how solid your body appears, tan, how you cut and style your hair e.t.c.
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Going back to your point, yep, it's not even a contest between a shredded average looking/ugly guy and a normal bodied good looking one. There are countless jacked guys like this and they get next to zero spontaneous attention despite the halo of their body and clothes because facially they are just not good enough - even for normal girls let alone hot ones. You are what your face is. They'll get attention from other guys though for their body and style and maybe a cursory glance from a girl due to the overall "effort package" but without wanting anything more. But it doesn't change the fact that they are in a much better position than other guys who aren't attractive (which accounts for a lot) and with a good personality, it offers a foot in the door even without the crush factor developing initially. It will help when girls are looking to settle down in particular. Not to mention they have presence and masculinity somewhat, there are also a very minority of girls obsessed with muscles. Same goes for a tall unattractive guy, there is some masculinity there, it may help in the same way with perseverance, better to have something than totally nothing. If you're bald, you have to tick other areas like a strong face first and foremost, good body, tan and fairly tall.
With a good face and hair, as others will also tell you on here from their experience, attraction is a done deal. You can be anywhere, even with your girl at times and they will still signal, girls can notice even better their subtle game. All they want is you to approach and show you're a normal guy, that you find something special and fun in them too. Once attraction is a done deal, girls put up with minor personality hiccups or life experiences, not going to take it as extreme as the Ted Bundy example, though that also tells you something too. If there are problems, they want to heal the guy they are invested in and have fallen for just like a guy would for a girl he likes.
In your case (I'll reply again on PM when I can) it isn't pointless because even if you can't take finasteride you can get a buzz cut type of transplant (anyone can), so keeping that body solid will still help you. Be aware though, if you want actual full hair, don't go beyond Norwood 3V, difficult to come back to nice hair beyond this, which Drs will tell you too. So it may be worth gambling on finasteride.
edit - andddd I forgot to mention designer beard, which is in demand these days.