I feel like an old man

[epictetus]

I'm 32, but when I look in the mirror I see someone who looks like they're in their late forties. I have diffuse thinning with the horseshoe outline foreshadowing my fate. I'll be "bald" by the time I'm 40.

Not only do I look like an old man, but I feel like one too. I just don't have any drive. I figure, what's the point? Money, possessions, all seem like a desperate attempt to compensate for my inferior looks. I feel out of place trying to date women my age. I have to work ten times harder, just like an older man trying to pick up younger women, and without the luxury of having money.

I really do feel like I'm done with life. I ought to have been born in Roman times when I'd be at the end of my lifespan at this point.

 

[Britannia]

To be fair with a ridiculous regieme like that, you are correct ts pretty much game over for you.

 

[s.a.f]

Ugh please Dudemon dont promote that site! :thumbdown2:

 

[HatPrisoner91]

That site isn't all it's cracked to be. It's similar to a cult and when you dare disagree with a cult, they turn on you.

Many people do shave their head and move on but it's not a cookie cutter approach. I don't have much to shave but I do shave off the sides and back and I try to move on. Problem is, my mind still thinks about it every day that will not change until I am in my 50's and 60's when I look like most of my peers.

There is nothing quite like the feeling of being on a train and being the ONLY guy under 40 who is bald.

 

[superfrankie]

There is nothing quite like the feeling of being on a train and being the ONLY guy under 40 who is bald.

Even though youre not (I am NW5 ,21 years old and started losing rapidly from when I was 17) it does not change the feeling you have since its very very uncommon to find bald guys in our age group. But even though it was common it wouldnt change the bitterness you feel about losing your hair.

Its the same with HIV and other diseases. Even though millions have it, it does not take away the burden you feel as an individual in any way.

 

[superfrankie]

Many people do shave their head and move on but it's not a cookie cutter approach.

Its hard to just "shave it and move on" when you have to spend endless energy on shaving it on a daily basis to keep it down to 0mm. It almost takes a full time employment in itself.

Ive done this for over a year now and Im sick of it. So Im shaving every other day which saves me tremendous amounts of energy that I can spend on other things. And the more hair that falls, the less I have to shave which in turn makes it quicker to shave. The big downside is that in order to look the best 0mm is the way to go since I have dark hair shadow. But as Ive said. Shaving every damn f*****g day is impossible. It drains you on too much energy. Likewise it requires a constant planing on when to shave which can make you mentally sick. At least it did with me.

 

[nerdwood]

Its hard to just "shave it and move on" when you have to spend endless energy on shaving it on a daily basis to keep it down to 0mm. It almost takes a full time employment in itself.

Shaving every damn f****ing day is impossible. It drains you on too much energy. Likewise it requires a constant planing on when to shave which can make you mentally sick. At least it did with me.

You gotta be kidding... a 10 minute shave drains all your energy? :gay:

Get some vitamin pills if things are that bad.

 

[Nene]

Its hard to just "shave it and move on" when you have to spend endless energy on shaving it on a daily basis to keep it down to 0mm. It almost takes a full time employment in itself.

Shaving every damn f****ing day is impossible. It drains you on too much energy. Likewise it requires a constant planing on when to shave which can make you mentally sick. At least it did with me.

You gotta be kidding... a 10 minute shave drains all your energy? :gay:

Get some vitamin pills if things are that bad.

I think he meant it's more mentally draining than physically. He feels like a slave to it.

 

[Ian Curtis]

Going bald over 30, well boo hoo.

 

[superfrankie]

Its hard to just "shave it and move on" when you have to spend endless energy on shaving it on a daily basis to keep it down to 0mm. It almost takes a full time employment in itself.

Shaving every damn f****ing day is impossible. It drains you on too much energy. Likewise it requires a constant planing on when to shave which can make you mentally sick. At least it did with me.

You gotta be kidding... a 10 minute shave drains all your energy? :gay:

Get some vitamin pills if things are that bad.

I think he meant it's more mentally draining than physically. He feels like a slave to it.

Thank you for clarifying. Slave to it is a perfect description.

Perhaps you are the one who should get vitamin pills after all Nerdwood for lack of understanding :gay:

 

[Eureka]

bah, why is everyone so obsessed with "looking good" It's there and it's gone, you could waste a lifetime on that noise.

But what does rolling over and taking defeat get you? Work with what you do have, rather than what you don't and or losing.

 

[epictetus]

I didn't start going bald at 30. I started at going bald at 17.

It's been a decade of hiding it, and it is exhausting. "Shave it off, bro!" Yeah, it doesn't work for everyone. I was average-to-ugly looking with hair, so guess what I am without hair? Ugly, 24/7. Guess what happens when you're ugly? You get to the point where socialization--which determines 99% of what people value--becomes all pain and no pleasure.

Who cares what people think? Nobody really believes that or they would become hermits.

 

[Shma]

Going bald over 30, well boo hoo.

Just because you're probably in your 20ies does not mean you care much less about losing your hair in your 30ies. I started balding at 16 and still wouldn't mock people over 30.

 

[Ian Curtis]

Though I dont see much use in whining, when someone says "I'll be bald by the time im 40" it annoys me.

 

[epictetus]

When I say "bald" by 40, I mean slick on top with the goofy-looking horseshoe. I had a bald spot starting at 17. I never even got to enjoy being a teenager. By the time the klutz-inducing awkwardness of growth stopped, I had a bald spot. I became very reclusive due to CONSTANTLY being mocked by friends in public. I lost my date the the prom from the clucking of her friends "Yeah, but he's balding!" A balding guy at 17-25 isn't even a beta male, he's the omega male.

At some point, I just stopped caring about other things. No matter what I accomplished, people would constantly shove in my face the fact that I was bald, and therefore, a loser. I don't know how many times I've heard some variant of "You might have or be X, but you're still bald".

 

[uncomfortable man]

Going bald over 30, well boo hoo.

Wrong. Bald by early to mid twenties, just more bald by thirty. Point is I lost it during a time when I needed it and indeed I do feel like I had part of my youth/normalcy stolen from me. I turned 35 on my last birthday and although I realize many people might consider that to be getting old, it was just depressing because for me the point was mute since I've been living life as a fifty year old from my twenties. I might as well have been turning 79. The worst part of being bald for me isn't my own reflection in the mirror rather the reflection on people's faces as they react negatively to my baldness. Every encounter, every instance look or comment reaffirms the fact that there is something wrong with my appearance. That combined with the powerlessness I have against what other people think and the unfair judgments they make can be enough to drive me insane.

 

[follicle84]

Uman just curious where do you live? Because were i live you woudnt get that much grief for being bald at 35. You actually suit it based on what i can see on your avatar.

 

[Shma]

[quote="Ian Curtis":21a8lxta]Going bald over 30, well boo hoo.

Wrong. Bald by early to mid twenties, just more bald by thirty. Point is I lost it during a time when I needed it and indeed I do feel like I had part of my youth/normalcy stolen from me. I turned 35 on my last birthday and although I realize many people might consider that to be getting old, it was just depressing because for me the point was mute since I've been living life as a fifty year old from my twenties. I might as well have been turning 79. The worst part of being bald for me isn't my own reflection in the mirror rather the reflection on people's faces as they react negatively to my baldness. Every encounter, every instance look or comment reaffirms the fact that there is something wrong with my appearance. That combined with the powerlessness I have against what other people think and the unfair judgments they make can be enough to drive me insane.[/quote:21a8lxta]

Just wondering: Is that you in your avatar, uncomfortable man?

 

[uncomfortable man]

Why do people think it is a geography issue? Look, it doesn't matter where I live because people are the same wherever you go. There is no special providence where bald people are the norm and are treated as such. And if I look so damn good then why do people still stare at me like a freak?

 

[follicle84]

Just tryin to help man. I cant understand it myself if people are acting that way towards you. The only feasible explanation i can come up with is that people in your area are shallow and not bald. Where i live its not too uncommon to see a guy as a norwood 5/6 at 35.