Looks And Looksmaxing Is Overated No One Cares

[doubleindemnity]

You don’t buy it? So this is an elaborate ruse to shake up your world view? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds.

I am 5”9 and skinny.

No denying that baldness robbs you of options and lowers your quality of life but to claim that no bald man ever under any circumstances got to plow a girl is just ludicrous.

You're right. It does sound ridiculous. Well the fact is that I've never seen a guy in your or my situation doing well. I haven't done well myself, of course. How do you do it? Daygame, night game, or what?

 

[Feelsbadman]

Good point OP (Serious)

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

You're right. It does sound ridiculous. Well the fact is that I've never seen a guy in your or my situation doing well. I haven't done well myself, of course. How do you do it? Daygame, night game, or what?

No secret, just social circles. Maybe I will be an incel after this relationship, who knows.

 

[Wolf Pack]

@Baldingat188

You're obviously right about the halo effect of a full head only being applicable to conventionally handsome guys but that doesn't mean everyone else should give up! Hair is not just about looking attractive for the opposite sex but also an issue of identity and most people need it to look normal, particularly in their youth. If I remember right, you have close to a full head but a boyish look, unless I'm confusing you with someone else? It's far easier to maintain this with a pill and supplementary transplants if needed than to let the hair go. If you look your best (regardless of your other aesthetics) you'll feel your best and that benefit will translate into all other areas you put your mind to whether socially, career or relationships. But you're correct in that there is no rule. Some people shave their head and look good enough due to their other features. In your case I feel you're actually giving up and that could be due to the social/general anxiety and depression you have which you should treat too. You don't want to dig yourself into a deeper hole, time and hair never comes back, don't want to scare you but actually saying enjoy your youth and life.

Priorities change over time or at least become dominant so you don't want to keep thinking of hair too and fluctuating between your decisions - that's a waste of time literally and mental energy. Be decisive and assess your own situation accurately. What every guy on here needs is a good group of friends (male/female) that they can share their hobbies with and also their more serious thoughts. I've been lucky here to have quite a few life long friends and extended families, they've made a huge difference to me in many ways. Acquaintances you may be able to drink or travel with but it's not the same thing if they're not in your inner circle.

Your lack of sex drive is most likely due to depression. Work on being the best version of yourself and overcoming your social anxiety - opportunities will come your way in many forms and forming new social circles. There's no shame in trying, it takes courage, giving up is too easy. During this festive period and also it being winter, more people will report feeling down if they are unhappy with some area of their life: looks, loneliness, career e.t.c. This is normal but don't let it spiral out of control mate and count your blessings.

 

[Baldingat188]

@Baldingat188

You're obviously right about the halo effect of a full head only being applicable to conventionally handsome guys but that doesn't mean everyone else should give up! Hair is not just about looking attractive for the opposite sex but also an issue of identity and most people need it to look normal, particularly in their youth. If I remember right, you have close to a full head but a boyish look, unless I'm confusing you with someone else? It's far easier to maintain this with a pill and supplementary transplants if needed than to let the hair go. If you look your best (regardless of your other aesthetics) you'll feel your best and that benefit will translate into all other areas you put your mind to whether socially, career or relationships. But you're correct in that there is no rule. Some people shave their head and look good enough due to their other features. In your case I feel you're actually giving up and that could be due to the social/general anxiety and depression you have which you should treat too. You don't want to dig yourself into a deeper hole, time and hair never comes back, don't want to scare you but actually saying enjoy your youth and life.

Priorities change over time or at least become dominant so you don't want to keep thinking of hair too and fluctuating between your decisions - that's a waste of time literally and mental energy. Be decisive and assess your own situation accurately. What every guy on here needs is a good group of friends (male/female) that they can share their hobbies with and also their more serious thoughts. I've been lucky here to have quite a few life long friends and extended families, they've made a huge difference to me in many ways. Acquaintances you may be able to drink or travel with but it's not the same thing if they're not in your inner circle.

Your lack of sex drive is most likely due to depression. Work on being the best version of yourself and overcoming your social anxiety - opportunities will come your way in many forms and forming new social circles. There's no shame in trying, it takes courage, giving up is too easy. During this festive period and also it being winter, more people will report feeling down if they are unhappy with some area of their life: looks, loneliness, career e.t.c. This is normal but don't let it spiral out of control mate and count your blessings.

Damn what you said about time and hair never coming back ... that kills me. I feel like I’m aging so fast and wasting my youth. I live in isolation pretty much and spend my weekend nights going to bed early. 2 years ago I thought I was going to be bald by now , so my entire focus was on that but now that I’ve managed to avoid that ( for the time being) I’ve watched as I’ve just shifted into other worries and my life never gets better.

I’ve tried to treat depression / anxiety with therapy but it’s never worked for me . My mind just feels like it works against me 24/7. I’m to afraid to get on anxiety meds cause I’ve heard they cause ED and hair loss . Latley I’ve been to nervous to even want to try dating a girl because I’ve been obsessing about having ED which is definitely related to anxiety . I guess I need to take some v**** and learn to socialize ? Life doesn’t get better unless you put in the work but damn that’s hard.

 

[Wolf Pack]

Damn what you said about time and hair never coming back ... that kills me. I feel like I’m aging so fast and wasting my youth. I live in isolation pretty much and spend my weekend nights going to bed early. 2 years ago I thought I was going to be bald by now , so my entire focus was on that but now that I’ve managed to avoid that ( for the time being) I’ve watched as I’ve just shifted into other worries and my life never gets better.

I’ve tried to treat depression / anxiety with therapy but it’s never worked for me . My mind just feels like it works against me 24/7. I’m to afraid to get on anxiety meds cause I’ve heard they cause ED and hair loss . Latley I’ve been to nervous to even want to try dating a girl because I’ve been obsessing about having ED which is definitely related to anxiety . I guess I need to take some v**** and learn to socialize ? Life doesn’t get better unless you put in the work but damn that’s hard.

It's difficult to advise someone over the net without knowing their background mental health and exactly how much they are suffering. One thing is for sure, I doubt you'll go visibly bald knowing how full your hair was and the precautions you're taking and the option of surgery. You need to let go of this irrational fear and try some therapy if you can't. You're right about anxiolytics and antidepressants generally negating sexual function but it's not always the case. Sounds to be like you need to take a multi prong approach to all this:

1) Therapy is always a good starting point
2) Low dose anxiolytic for a few months to help you concentrate on improving in the areas that bother you.
3) v**** is good for performance anxiety and after the first attempts you won't need it again as you gain confidence. I'm sure you don't have actual ED but this is often used as insurance in those with anxiety.

Retraining your mind is the most important part so focus on the reward may be? If you don't learn to enjoy the company of the friend you get along with, the girl you're meeting, the academic/career goals, the hobbies - you won't get much out of it and may even quit. Dress in a style you like and that suits you, stay groomed, take care of your health - diet/gym e.t.c. You'll hopefully find that opportunities come your way, I know about the halo effect but you can still make good progress and contentment regardless.

Just don't end up with regrets over inaction, better to make active choices regardless of how they end up, you still tried. Don't end up balding through inaction, poor dress sense, not taking care of yourself, depressed...it will just make it hard to socialise well as you look odd. If I see a shaved guy looking good enough it's because the rest is on point and the shaved head looks shows uniformity and confidence over growing out poor hair which looks weak, insecure and inferior. You know yourself best I hope, ask a neutral "friend" or randoms on here.

 

[Meeee199]

2 years ago I thought I was going to be bald by now.

When I was 15 I started losing hair. In the shower I used to get 50+ hairs. I freaked out and was depressed. I spent 2 years hiding and avoiding people because I was afraid that someone would make a comment about my thinning hair. I was sure that by 20 I ll be bald completely . At 17 I decided to shave it really short to stop worrying and checking my hairline on the mirror every minute. I am now 27 .. I still have hair all over my head .. the first time I heard the comment I was afraid of when I was 15 that my hair is being thinner was 2 months ago, and it came from my barber. I know for sure I ll be bald within 2-3 years .. but imagine if at 17 I kept hiding and withdrawing from social events how much years I would have lost. The mentality of expecting that you will go bald after a number of years and living according to your estimation is wrong and dangerous. Hair loss is unpredictable. Just live in the moment and stop expecting the worse case scenarios.

 

[GreekGod_of_Aesthetics]

Even when my hair was in his prime (NW1, thick, dark-colored), I still didn't have success with women. Because I was a loner with social anxiety, couldn't flirt, couldn't hold a conversation.
OP is kinda right.
If you're in the average-looking spectrum, looks-maxing will not make women approach you, except in some rare situations. It's still for nothing if you don't put yourself out there. When you do that, you will see payoff.

I am now facing the possibility of losing my hair. Let's say I do manage to improve my social skills, to become a better flirter.
Would the NW1 version of me, with the improved skills have better success than the soon-to-be NW3 me, with the same skills?
Of course, that's undeniable. But it's something I may have to make peace with.

 

[infinitepain]

No secret, just social circles. Maybe I will be an incel after this relationship, who knows.

You will. Everyone that isn't good looking and is getting laid was due propinquitiy (social circles etc)

 

[infinitepain]

It's difficult to advise someone over the net without knowing their background mental health and exactly how much they are suffering. One thing is for sure, I doubt you'll go visibly bald knowing how full your hair was and the precautions you're taking and the option of surgery. You need to let go of this irrational fear and try some therapy if you can't. You're right about anxiolytics and antidepressants generally negating sexual function but it's not always the case. Sounds to be like you need to take a multi prong approach to all this:

1) Therapy is always a good starting point
2) Low dose anxiolytic for a few months to help you concentrate on improving in the areas that bother you.
3) v**** is good for performance anxiety and after the first attempts you won't need it again as you gain confidence. I'm sure you don't have actual ED but this is often used as insurance in those with anxiety.

Retraining your mind is the most important part so focus on the reward may be? If you don't learn to enjoy the company of the friend you get along with, the girl you're meeting, the academic/career goals, the hobbies - you won't get much out of it and may even quit. Dress in a style you like and that suits you, stay groomed, take care of your health - diet/gym e.t.c. You'll hopefully find that opportunities come your way, I know about the halo effect but you can still make good progress and contentment regardless.

Just don't end up with regrets over inaction, better to make active choices regardless of how they end up, you still tried. Don't end up balding through inaction, poor dress sense, not taking care of yourself, depressed...it will just make it hard to socialise well as you look odd. If I see a shaved guy looking good enough it's because the rest is on point and the shaved head looks shows uniformity and confidence over growing out poor hair which looks weak, insecure and inferior. You know yourself best I hope, ask a neutral "friend" or randoms on here.

Premature ejacualtion ruined my life as well as other physical traits like being a manlet and skinny on HS and having an uneven chest for som ereaosn.

The only thing that somehow has allowed me to mastubate for a longer period of time without feeling involuntary kegels is one of those numbing sprays however im yet to try it with an escort to see if it works in a real life scenario.

 

[justinbieberscombover]

Bollocks.

Looksmaxing helped me a lot, and I'm not model tier lol.

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

You will. Everyone that isn't good looking and is getting laid was due propinquitiy (social circles etc)

Facelift and Tsuji it is then.

 

[Me Vs DiffuseThinning]

I just wanna look normal lol. I have a cranial deformity.

 

[infinitepain]

Facelift and Tsuji it is then.

How old are you and how did you get your current gf? how much money you make? do you live alone?

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

How old are you and how did you get your current gf? how much money you make? do you live alone?

29 met her through social circles, we quit now. Currently not making any bucks, living alone.

 

[GreekGod_of_Aesthetics]

The only looksmaxing that you need is:

• getting a lean body with some muscle on it.
• dressing well, having a sense of style, and getting the grooming basics
• learning social skills, learn to talk with women, have a social circle
• Keeping your hair and not going bald
• professional pictures for Tinder

These will get you 80% of the results. The others will rarely work and will only cause more frustration.
Nobody will turn from average-looking to male-model tier. It's not gonna happen.

 

[justinbieberscombover]

The only looksmaxing that you need is:

• getting a lean body with some muscle on it.
• dressing well, having a sense of style, and getting the grooming basics
• learning social skills, learn to talk with women, have a social circle
• Keeping your hair and not going bald
• professional pictures for Tinder

These will get you 80% of the results. The others will rarely work and will only cause more frustration.
Nobody will turn from average-looking to male-model tier. It's not gonna happen.

+ growing a beard.

Professional pictures can look forced tho, I don't really mess with them.
Getting really good at taking selfies is an option.

 

[infinitepain]

29 met her through social circles, we quit now. Currently not making any bucks, living alone.

What, so you are incel again? taht sucks

How hold was she? I just turn 30 and im depressed, I feel like im an old f*** now and I have no social circles.

How are you living alone without making any money? are you unemployed using savings?

Man a need a gf. Im just doomed due prem. ejaculation mostly. I can't have proper sex. Let's hope I can cope with the numbing cream which I still have to try on a escort first... but fapping test did at least help going longer.

 

[LosingHairLosingPatience]

Pretty much. Last week I had a business conference and these two women were googly eyeing me. I shave my head all the way now a days. But then at that bar the other day, the chick sitting next to me wasn't that interested and open, but she's by herself at a bar- not necessarily a good sign. The lesson learned here is there are chicks out there for sure, but you have to have something going for you- because who wants to spend time with someone boring.

 

[Exodus2011]

I believe I’m one of the worst people for pulling of being bald. Ever since I found out I was balding I’ve felt my life was ending. But luckily hairloss drugs have been working for me and now I’m just asking myself now what? I still don’t have a social life , I still don’t date . I have a feeling my life would be pretty similar if I were bald anyways even though I would look significantly worse. Because even though some girls do find me attractive now , since I am not chad status it’s not like they just approach out of the blue.

nah, being totally bald and 3 years into being NEET, and with social anxiety and literally all my friends have moved away so ive been alone for the past year or so, its EXTREMELY depressing . i had periods of life like this when i had hair i at least had a SPARK, a FIRE inside, i was still able to do my responsibilities, i felt alive, now i dont feel any of that at all. life is just numbing myself to the pain and oblivion of being an ugly version of myself. i leave dirty clothes around, dishes in the sink, even short walks and standing are hard, i have absolutely NO energy or soul or passion anymore.

trust me i do get where you are coming from, its the mindset i have when i'm in ok/ coping mode but thats all you will ever be if you are a self aware baldie - in coping mode. you will never be your best self, instead you will be a far inferior version of yourself. and that will never change, its the ultimate soul eating aspect of baldness

you're just a typical forever alone social anxiety type, like me, we are affected MUCH more by baldness. except look at our differences. i'm what? 26 and never had a job, kissless handholdless virgin, dont even have a degree, live at home with my mom? and you? you lost your virginity , nowhere near as much posts, pretty sure u had a job, lol. the evidence is in the behavior.

yes its true most guys are average looking, but at least you have a chance when you are 5-6, thats what most people are, now think, theyre already precariously only in decent looking category, what will happen when they go bald? they will become legit unattractive. theres a BIG difference between unattractiveness and being mediocre/average. the human mind is qualitative, not quantitative. they dont see a 5 and think "i'm only 25% more attracted to them than a 4", no you are in a totally different category of being, not just datability but your overall worth as a human.

and being ignored in 90% of situations is 10x better than 99%. again the qualitative thing not the quantitative thing. humans are by f*****g definition social, you need them like f*****g air, i can practically guarantee you will be a LOT happier being ignored 90% of the time vs 99%