Women Critiquing The "nice Guy" Of Online Dating

[Janko]

Thanks for your reply. I hope the Panthers make the playoffs. I also have a soft spot for the Vikings so it would be good if they made the play-offs too.

I haven't really paid much attention to the 49ers to be honest.
They do deserve some relief.

Ahh,vikings. I like them too. However I truly don´t like Aints.
Honestly the last match wasn´t won by panthers. Everything went bad for vikings. Looking forward to have the conference final between vikings and panthers.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

It is good you are kind. Be proud of it. Peoples with morals and values are the most interesting and the best companions for everything.

Except f*****g.

 

[IdealForehead]

Except f*****g.

Just be handsome bro. One of my best friends in undergrad was also one of the kindest guys I knew. Volunteered weekly with retarded people. Spent a few weeks volunteering in Tanzania. He's a small town rural doctor now with a wife and two kids. Very wholesome guy. One of the best I've known.

Every time we'd go out at least one girl would hit on him endlessly at any bar or club.

He'd always find it embarrassing and try to gently blow them off. He used to say he doesn't believe in casual sex. He said it was pointless and had too much potential to be mean to the girl. When he got married he told me once he had sex with 6 or 7 girls in his whole life. This is a guy who could have fucked dozens to hundreds of he wanted.

Standard 5'11" 7/10 white guy.

Being nice has nothing to do with it. Girls will want you whether you are nice or not if you have the other features they actually care about.

I think the only reason that "not nice" guys can sometimes cheat their genetics is their lack of ethics allows them to do things most of us would find reprehensible. Eg. All the sex abuse claims in the media. Personally I don't want sex under those conditions and I don't think most of us would either. Or drug dealing and using girls' addictions against them for sex, etc.

 

[davesmith420]

IMO as long as you're good looking and don't come off as being on the Spectrum, being "too nice" won't matter.

 

[davesmith420]

Also, the messages in the OP are cringey as f***. Those cucks don't know how to take rejection. "Attacking" the girl just because she isn't interested is the last thing you should do; then the messages will just be screenshotted and posted on social media with the girl saying "Look at this loser! So C R E E P Y!!!"

 

[Rudiger]

You can have both but when you're handed that amount of power and options, it's hard to remain a good person.

I was just talking with my tall good-looking colleague and he's just pounding his way through women like you wouldn't believe.

And many of those girls end up lashing out at him because he just won't settle (and he's 33). So he's just breaking heart after heart.

He always has the same justifications: "I'm always clear about intentions, I always tell them upfront that it's not going to be serious, so I'm not at fault! They're the ones making up a fairy tale in their minds."

I love that guy (no homer) and it's not just because of his halo™, but at a point, he should realize that it doesn't matter if he's honest, he's going to break their hearts anyway, because I (now) believe that there's no such thing as casual sex, especially for girls, and especially when it's with Chad.

I'm no Chad but I've broken many hearts, and it's no fun for both parties, my colleague just doesn't understand why the girls end up lashing out at him, they think they all have a problem and that he's not at fault.

I guess it's easier to be moral when you have little to no options, Nietzche used to say that it's how the weak justify their failures. But conversely, if you have options, I think it's your duty to be responsible and use that "power" to sustain a long-term relationship with a girl that you find special.

This way you'll make yourself happier in the long-term, you'll make the girl you've chosen happy and most importantly, you'll stop potentially ruining all those girls for other guys who'd like to do the same. Better for you, better for her, better for everyone else.

I guess some people confuse "won't settle" with "can't settle". Maybe not for this guy but surely the vast majority of us want to fall in love and feel that security, some guys are just messed up and only see the negative possibilities of every situation, including romantic relationships.

 

[Exodus2011]

You can have both but when you're handed that amount of power and options, it's hard to remain a good person.

I was just talking with my tall good-looking colleague and he's just pounding his way through women like you wouldn't believe.

And many of those girls end up lashing out at him because he just won't settle (and he's 33). So he's just breaking heart after heart.

He always has the same justifications: "I'm always clear about intentions, I always tell them upfront that it's not going to be serious, so I'm not at fault! They're the ones making up a fairy tale in their minds."

I love that guy (no homer) and it's not just because of his halo™, but at a point, he should realize that it doesn't matter if he's honest, he's going to break their hearts anyway, because I (now) believe that there's no such thing as casual sex, especially for girls, and especially when it's with Chad.

I'm no Chad but I've broken many hearts, and it's no fun for both parties, my colleague just doesn't understand why the girls end up lashing out at him, they think they all have a problem and that he's not at fault.

I guess it's easier to be moral when you have little to no options, Nietzche used to say that it's how the weak justify their failures. But conversely, if you have options, I think it's your duty to be responsible and use that "power" to sustain a long-term relationship with a girl that you find special.

This way you'll make yourself happier in the long-term, you'll make the girl you've chosen happy and most importantly, you'll stop potentially ruining all those girls for other guys who'd like to do the same. Better for you, better for her, better for everyone else.

lol seriously i've had this problem in my chad god fantasies. i would legit feel pretty dang guilty about how insecure i would make everyone, if i would use those powers for good or for evil. sh*t, even being humble about it would make people possibly insecure and envious and jealous, they would see me as superior AND moral.

 

[Exodus2011]

Also, the messages in the OP are cringey as f***. Those cucks don't know how to take rejection. "Attacking" the girl just because she isn't interested is the last thing you should do; then the messages will just be screenshotted and posted on social media with the girl saying "Look at this loser! So C R E E P Y!!!"

OH MY GOD. THIS PERSON CARES ABOUT SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS AND ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE. SO EVIL OMG

 

[Janko]

Except f*****g.

It depends on what you are looking for. If you are looking for the one night stand girl, they will reject you, because they find a nice behavior as a sign of commitment. If for relationship, than show me a girl, that wouldn´t want a guy with some dignity and morals. Girls like nice guys. But not those "nice" guys. It is hard to find the exact line between being nice and too nice, but once you find it the world is yours.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

That's what my colleague wants, to have his cake and eat it too.

You can tell he kind of expects people to feel sorry for him because his love life is a mess.

It's a bit like those female CEO's who still claim that they are oppressed victims.

Sorry guys, you can't have both .

He can have his cake and eat it too. If he has a cake then why can't he eat it?

 

[Rudiger]

Bateman alert

 

[sachalamp]

You can have both but when you're handed that amount of power and options, it's hard to remain a good person.

I was just talking with my tall good-looking colleague and he's just pounding his way through women like you wouldn't believe.

And many of those girls end up lashing out at him because he just won't settle (and he's 33). So he's just breaking heart after heart.

He always has the same justifications: "I'm always clear about intentions, I always tell them upfront that it's not going to be serious, so I'm not at fault! They're the ones making up a fairy tale in their minds."

I love that guy (no homer) and it's not just because of his halo™, but at a point, he should realize that it doesn't matter if he's honest, he's going to break their hearts anyway, because I (now) believe that there's no such thing as casual sex, especially for girls, and especially when it's with Chad.

I'm no Chad but I've broken many hearts, and it's no fun for both parties, my colleague just doesn't understand why the girls end up lashing out at him, they think they all have a problem and that he's not at fault.

I guess it's easier to be moral when you have little to no options, Nietzche used to say that it's how the weak justify their failures. But conversely, if you have options, I think it's your duty to be responsible and use that "power" to sustain a long-term relationship with a girl that you find special.

This way you'll make yourself happier in the long-term, you'll make the girl you've chosen happy and most importantly, you'll stop potentially ruining all those girls for other guys who'd like to do the same. Better for you, better for her, better for everyone else.

Then don't engage with him anymore, f*** him. You're right he is breaking hearts whether he is rationalizing he's being honest or not. That's like those idiots who hook up with a person who is in a relationship and say they have no fault in it, just the one who cheats does. Which is such a bullshit it's not even funny. And he's f*****g 33 yo, not some 19 yo horndog.

Casual sex like that is very unhealthy, especially for women. This whole hookup culture is making a mess out of western society.

Tell him he's being a moron and unless he changes that, let him know you're done with him. And if he is bragging around, call him on his bullshit every time.

I'd ditch any friend/acquaintance i have if i found out he/she is acting like that or cheating. I have my own standards to whom I talk to or not.

 

[sachalamp]

That's the big lie a lot of us have been fed, that there is such thing as casual sex/relationships.

Don't get me wrong, I've been quite the horndog myself, dehumanizing women in the process, just pursuing my selfish desires while pretending that I was a "free man" who would never fall in love with those selfish hypergamous women (thanks to that Red Pill ideology).

Many people still make up theories about how we should be detached from one's partner, how we can overcome our feelings of jealousy and our will to belong to each other.

That's all horseshit of course, it doesn't work for anyone and suffering always arises for one or both parties involved at a point. It's like communism, it just doesn't fit human nature and there's no way to sweep our natural feelings under the rug.

The only way to have a healthy relationship is to make sure that both parties are all in. That's what we figured out in the West and many cultures a long time ago, by instituting marriage and making that union sacred.

You remove that sacred bond and it all goes to sh*t, and many people become jaded, cynical serial daters who then think that their way of life is a testament that love does not exist. Until you're all in, you won't understand what relationships are all about.

Relationships are about sacrifice, people hate that word these days because they want everything and its opposite all the time. Many men and women want to be in a relationship, but they also want the freedom that comes with not being in a relationship. I'm sorry sweethearts, but you can't have both.

About my colleague, I tell him what I think but I'll never become a moralistic bore, he has to figure this out for himself. He knows he's not happy, he knows he doesn't feel fulfilled, he often says that maybe he's just too demanding and he should stop looking for a girl that doesn't exist. There's no need to have such drastic reactions towards people who have a different way of life.

I was like that myself and am quite ashamed by it now at 30. Not on your colleague's league of a douchebag but still in that direction.

You're pretty on point about the rest of your post.

As for the last part, it's not about being a moralistic bore, it's about having standards for yourself. I'd not be satisfied of conversing or being around people like that because it would put a dent on my own standards and I certainly don't have to be nice to or friends with everybody under any circumstances.

If he/she is acknowledging at least he's being a douchebag, then I would reconsider talking for a while, reminding him/her that it won't be forever and i will cut ties again if he/she doesn't stop whatever he/she is doing.

Biggest issue here is that he doesn't even seem to be near the point of admitting he's doing any wrong, let alone actively changing it, all he's talking about is his own discomfort. That for me would be more than enough to call him out and cut ties.

 

[sachalamp]

I think that's way too extreme, I think you need to be tolerate of other people's ideas and beliefs, as long as they are not beheading other people.

Honestly, fck other people's beliefs, especially the ones that are objectively abhorrent, like this guy's here or muslims or whatever. I won't for example tolerate muslims up to the point of them beheading people, they have million shitty, horrid and toxic attitudes and beliefs up to the beheading thing. A belief that doesn't stand criticism is not a worthy belief.

I've been way too kind and nice up until recently and all i did was being a cuck. I don't owe them anything and i'd rather not step on my own standards for their sake. I can replace that guy with another that doesn't make my skin crawl.

That doesn't mean i won't be greeting or responding to the greeting of the person i cut ties with, basic decency, but it stops at that.