Anyone Else Feel Like They Will Never Be Happy Again?

[Exodus2011]

idk i just can't get myself to be truly happy these days knowing i'm a significantly inferior version of my past self. its extremely depressing. like it doesnt even matter if you still look okay with baldness, you will still always be a downgrade, a "shadow of your former self" like it has been worded here before.

not that im depressed (i think? probably would need to confirm with a professional) but i'm never above like a 4-5 in happiness. i'm usually a 5, just okay. oftentimes a 4 though just thinking in the back of my head about being an inferior "me", theres no f*****g way to forget it. its ALWAYS there. thats the ultimate sh*t pill about baldness. you'll always be a has been past your prime and you will never be what you once were, in an obvious important way

i never have energy either. i can drink an energy drink and like 2 coffees and i have about as much energy as i did as a sober full head. having energy is mental. i just don't see the point in being some happy positive energetic guy as a bald man. nor do i feel like one.

 

[blackg]

I appreciate a lot of what you're saying, exo. The energy sapping nature of truly hating who you are is often ignored.

 

[Dante92]

"Being happy"? I don't even know what this even means. My life has always been a meaningless grey fog made of compromise and days which were more or less depressing. Happiness is the privilege of the good-looking and the rich.

 

[Aldrich]

Stop wanting things. Only then will you be 'happy', which is better described as 'harmonious'. You're 'happy' when you eat your favorite candy. It's an extremely simplistic feeling that shouldn't be applied to life in any meaningful way. What you want is the absence of suffering, or harmony. You can only get it when you remove desire.

This applies to everyone, in all situations, hair or not.

 

[Exodus2011]

Stop wanting things. Only then will you be 'happy', which is better described as 'harmonious'. You're 'happy' when you eat your favorite candy. It's an extremely simplistic feeling that shouldn't be applied to life in any meaningful way. What you want is the absence of suffering, or harmony. You can only get it when you remove desire.

This applies to everyone, in all situations, hair or not.

thats the problem. knowing i'll always be an inferior version of myself keeps me from feeling harmony.

 

[hairblues]

thats the problem. knowing i'll always be an inferior version of myself keeps me from feeling harmony.

exhaustion can be a sign of depression maybe you should go speak to someone also get a physical just to make sure you don't have anything like anemia or something else making you tired. Be careful of medications though I think people are over-medicated with mental drugs. Not advising against it just make sure that is what you need or want before taking.

I wish you could find a passion you can throw yourself into fully..you spoken about liking to write I wish you could find a writing group of your peers, even some beta readers who read your stuff gives you notes feedback etc--either your age and gender OR people with similar genre interest.

If you have creative or artistic tendencies you can actually get lost in them...I have had relationships break up over them lol. You can get obsessive about these things---MOST people i would warn of this because you can forgo a lot of other areas of your life due to being obsessive over a creative passion but in your case since you don't wish too or feel you can't date--then losing yourself in a passion can be good for you.
If you can find a practical way to aim it into a profession or schooling it is even better.
And find people with similar interests to at least go get coffee and talk with once in a while.

I know a fine artist who drifted into advertising--he still obsessively paints in his spare time which led to the demise of his marriage but he does not care. It's compulsive. So his case its been damaging but if you are not dating or trying to have a relationship its probably freeing.

 

[rclark]

Feel this way twenty four hours.

Ugly as f***, and I know that even if my hair does get better, my face will not.

 

[blackg]

I wish you could find a writing group of your peers, even some beta readers who read your stuff...

Haha.. "beta readers." As opposed to alpha readers?

 

[Virginityrocks]

Stop wanting things. Only then will you be 'happy', which is better described as 'harmonious'. You're 'happy' when you eat your favorite candy. It's an extremely simplistic feeling that shouldn't be applied to life in any meaningful way. What you want is the absence of suffering, or harmony. You can only get it when you remove desire.

This applies to everyone, in all situations, hair or not.

Incorrect. Suffering is and will always be a part of life, and for all living things. It is an inextricable part of being alive. Happiness is a state of mind, not an emotion. Succumbing to your desires, like sex, power, and love are a medication that treat the symptoms of your depression, not the disease that is eating you alive. And like anesthesia they numb you to the pain that grows ever larger. Happiness can only be achieved through introspection and processing the true underlying cause of your external distress, often rooted in loneliness, an unsatisfying relationship with family, or traumatic childhood experience.

True happiness can only be achieved when you take full license over your own body and mind, and not allow the values you've unconsciously surrendered to to control your direction in life. To not allow the culture and values of others to take precedence over your own. To enjoy life and to make its own meaning, and to reject all external notions of conformity to the established thought. Happiness is freedom.

 

[blackg]

Incorrect. Suffering is and will always be a part of life, and for all living things. It is an inextricable part of being alive. Happiness is a state of mind, not an emotion. Succumbing to your desires, like sex, power, and love are a medication that treat the symptoms of your depression, not the disease that is eating you alive. And like anesthesia they numb you to the pain that grows ever larger. Happiness can only be achieved through introspection and processing the true underlying cause of your external distress, often rooted in loneliness, an unsatisfying relationship with family, or traumatic childhood experience.

True happiness can only be achieved when you take full license over your own body and mind, and not allow the values you've unconsciously surrendered to to control your direction in life. To not allow the culture and values of others to take precedence over your own. To enjoy life and to make its own meaning, and to reject all external notions of conformity to the established thought. Happiness is freedom.

I agree.

 

[CaptainForehead]

idk i just can't get myself to be truly happy these days knowing i'm a significantly inferior version of my past self. its extremely depressing. like it doesnt even matter if you still look okay with baldness, you will still always be a downgrade, a "shadow of your former self" like it has been worded here before.

Only in terms of aesthetics. While aesthetics is important, it isn't the only thing which defines the worth of a man.

Take into consideration other aspects. Grow in other dimensions.

i never have energy either. i can drink an energy drink and like 2 coffees and i have about as much energy as i did as a sober full head. having energy is mental. i just don't see the point in being some happy positive energetic guy as a bald man. nor do i feel like one.

Side effect of weed?


Another tip is to fake it. Act like you have more energy.

One of your major problems is that you don't have goals. You don't "see the point".

The point is to maximize your potential in life.

 

[rclark]

Incorrect. Suffering is and will always be a part of life, and for all living things. It is an inextricable part of being alive. Happiness is a state of mind, not an emotion. Succumbing to your desires, like sex, power, and love are a medication that treat the symptoms of your depression, not the disease that is eating you alive. And like anesthesia they numb you to the pain that grows ever larger. Happiness can only be achieved through introspection and processing the true underlying cause of your external distress, often rooted in loneliness, an unsatisfying relationship with family, or traumatic childhood experience.

True happiness can only be achieved when you take full license over your own body and mind, and not allow the values you've unconsciously surrendered to to control your direction in life. To not allow the culture and values of others to take precedence over your own. To enjoy life and to make its own meaning, and to reject all external notions of conformity to the established thought. Happiness is freedom.

Sex is great, even masturbation. If we don't succumb to it, it's possible our plumbing will "go down the drain", just like our aged
middle leg will.

It's probably just like our brains, use it or lose it!

In fact, I was joining a Mormon group in Utah, called if virginity might knock, but POLYGAMY ROCKS!

When I realized they were my cousins, time to find more virgins... I thought to myself.

Remember, my half of century wisdom, I bestow on you, @Virginityrocks :

IF YOU DON'T PLAY WITH THE HOSE, THE NOZZLE NEVER GROWS (rclark/ May fourteenth of 2017)​

 

[hairblues]

Haha.. "beta readers." As opposed to alpha readers?

LOL it's real thing. There is such thing as an alpha reader as well but I think that comes from years of cultivating someone.

There is this thing I never did it but I have friends who do it called Nano writers I will try to find the link...I know professional writers who do it just to keep sharp but also a lot of amateur and aspiring etc.

http://nanowrimo.org I am not sure how it works but I know there is a month they all try and do it, okay just looked and it is in November. But maybe @Exodus2011 can use it to find other writers in meantime that he connects with and give himself a structure for writing.

 

[Follisket]

It's honestly so bad I can't imagine even suddenly regrowing my hair could fix it. It's like the mere experience of balding and knowing it's possible to feel like this would haunt me forever.

That's the real horror of it: at some point you can't imagine yourself sane and happy anymore, you can't even visualize yourself with a normal hair line.

I'm getting by on alcohol, sleeping pills and anxiety medication, and regularly drink myself to sleep. These days, the thought of possibly not waking up is the only thing that calms me down before bed.

 

[TylerDurdenn]

Agreed, really looking forward to get all my hair back, I will travel the world, hook up with a new girl on Tinder every night, jizz on her, sleep in her bed and eat her food.

 

[Xander94]

Only thing that makes me cope is gymcelling and keeping my hair. Stay strong dude better days will come.

 

[Virginityrocks]

I'm getting by on alcohol, sleeping pills and anxiety medication, and regularly drink myself to sleep. These days, the thought of possibly not waking up is the only thing that calms me down before bed.

Treating the symptoms will not stop the disease! You need to accept who are and stop being ashamed of yourself. There is nothing wrong with you! Honestly, I think a lot of the men on these boards do not understand the definition of "acceptance". When I say "acceptance", I do not mean accept that you are a "sub-human" or "genetically inferior" as many people on this board love to throw around. I mean accept that your situation is uncontrollable, and accept that your "problem" with hairloss is actually an excuse, an illusion the mind is playing on itself, to hide from you the many other, more meaningful reasons why women may find you unattractive — Things you do have control over! — mostly your complete lack of self-esteem or self-confidence, or your persistent close-mindedness to the reality that women are not one dimensional shallow creatures, but complex and multifaceted that, just like men, have fantasies and fetishes that decide their choice of partner much more closely than whether or not they have strands of keratin growing out of a piece of skin on the top of your head. You're a human being. If women can't see your value, show it to them! Impress them! Learn to play an instrument! Find hobbies you're passionate in and explore them with the curiosity of a child! Be a wonderful father! Make social connections! Be in politics! Prove your value!

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

Treating the symptoms will not stop the disease! You need to accept who are and stop being ashamed of yourself. There is nothing wrong with you! Honestly, I think a lot of the men on these boards do not understand the definition of "acceptance". When I say "acceptance", I do not mean accept that you are a "sub-human" or "genetically inferior" as many people on this board love to throw around. I mean accept that your situation is uncontrollable, and accept that your "problem" with hairloss is actually an excuse, an illusion the mind is playing on itself, to hide from you the many other, more meaningful reasons why women may find you unattractive — mostly your complete lack of self-esteem or self-confidence, or your persistent close-mindedness to the reality that women are not one dimensional shallow creatures, but complex and multifaceted that, just like men, have fantasies and fetishes that decide their choice of partner much more closely than whether or not they have strands of keratin growing out of a piece of skin on the top of your head.

When you work out, you're only treating the symptom. You are supposed to be fat and weak. Some women are into that, you know.

 

[Saurabhaj]

idk i just can't get myself to be truly happy these days knowing i'm a significantly inferior version of my past self. its extremely depressing. like it doesnt even matter if you still look okay with baldness, you will still always be a downgrade, a "shadow of your former self" like it has been worded here before.

not that im depressed (i think? probably would need to confirm with a professional) but i'm never above like a 4-5 in happiness. i'm usually a 5, just okay. oftentimes a 4 though just thinking in the back of my head about being an inferior "me", theres no f*****g way to forget it. its ALWAYS there. thats the ultimate sh*t pill about baldness. you'll always be a has been past your prime and you will never be what you once were, in an obvious important way

i never have energy either. i can drink an energy drink and like 2 coffees and i have about as much energy as i did as a sober full head. having energy is mental. i just don't see the point in being some happy positive energetic guy as a bald man. nor do i feel like one.

Today I saw one programme on T.V about baldness and hair transplant.

At the ending,40 year old NW0 anchor said in my language that roughly translates to "lets join to make India Bald Free".

Still it was not enough to make me sad.
I have decided to improve in other aspects than concentrating on things that are not in my hand.


I don't know what is the exact English word but sometimes some guys react in opposite direction.

On one side,if someone says,it's just hair,come on bro,move on! and we say they don't understand baldness.
On the other hand,when someone jokes on baldness,we feel bad for baldness comment.
We are not open to accept that baldness sucks in public.
I have read multiple posts about like i don't care for baldness.

I want to mention two things that made me rethink about my baldness woes:

My close relative said to me:
In this fast pace world,no one has time for thinking about the other person.
All have to deal with their own life troubles and your hair loss trouble is nothing in front of their own personal trouble.

And other was posted by one female friend in her About me of Facebook profile that roughly translates:
"We are so engrossed in to looking beautiful by doing makeup but
those who care about us don't care about how we look,
and those who don't care about us,our looks won't matter to them
This is 100% reality.


Sorry for bad grammar as its really difficult to translate regional language phrases for me.
.

 

[TylerDurdenn]

Today I saw one programme on T.V about baldness and hair transplant.

At the ending,40 year old NW0 anchor said in my language that roughly translates to "lets join to make India Bald Free".

Still it was not enough to make me sad.
I have decided to improve in other aspects than concentrating on things that are not in my hand.


I don't know what is the exact English word but sometimes some guys react in opposite direction.

On one side,if someone says,it's just hair,come on bro,move on! and we say they don't understand baldness.
On the other hand,when someone jokes on baldness,we feel bad for baldness comment.
We are not open to accept that baldness sucks in public.
I have read multiple posts about like i don't care for baldness.

I want to mention two things that made me rethink about my baldness woes:

My close relative said to me:
In this fast pace world,no one has time for thinking about the other person.
All have to deal with their own life troubles and your hair loss trouble is nothing in front of their own personal trouble.

And other was posted by one female friend in her About me of Facebook profile that roughly translates:
"We are so engrossed in to looking beautiful by doing makeup but
those who care about us don't care about how we look,
and those who don't care about us,our looks won't matter to them
This is 100% reality.


Sorry for bad grammar as its really difficult to translate regional language phrases for me.
.

Yes indeed, people care mostly about themselfes, this is nothing new. But accepting balding because no one cares is, mehhh, if I allready had established a family with the my dream girl I wouldnt care if i went bald when I was 25 or 65(Almost wouldnt care tho). But when ur young and are nowhere near this kind of life, and then balding kicks in and destroys ur life, I would never give this kind of advise of "just letting go". Reality is that attractive girls dont want a baldie, so u have to lower ur standards. Only reason u dont want to loose ur hair is because it destroys ur chances with the opposite sex.