Do you pretend to not care?

[MI92]

Yeah I agree, just feel like staying in shape now. Plus I'll never really be "big" at 5'5"/5'6" anyway, I feel like steroids have messed up my hormones, I'm still recovering. Only my shoulders really looked juiced when I was on, shirtless I looked natural still. Look pretty much the same now as I did before starting them. For some reason my face still retains some puffiness and bloat despite being off steroids now and my lowrst body weight in 3 years along with low bodyfat. Before steroids even at 10-15lbs over my current weight my face was less puffy. so definitely seems to be a hormonal issue (always lethargic, bad digestion etc.) could all be related although I'm not sure.

 

[Wolf Pack]

You can pack on a lot of size if you have a smaller frame and height, with the right genetics of course too. But it can have the opposite effect. Make you look more like a built up pit bull, not a nice look IMO. But a lot guys get really big not for looks or girls, but because they enjoy it. Fair play to them.

Yes steroids can be dangerous unless you plan meticulously and do a lot of research.

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My natural state is girlish. Thin wrists, flabby body, very weak, round face.

I have to lift to get some resemblance to being a man.


It took me YEARS to bench 135 lbs (60kgs).

At least you're trying and are improving, all you can do. I don't lift heavy, mainly to maintain but also I don't want to risk injury as I enjoy playing sport. You don't want to stress out your musculoskeletal system too much.

Round face can look more acceptable bald though. Not saying necessarily attractive, but acceptable.

I look masculine in a Greek kind of way so even though my head shape is not bad, we really would lose points being bald due to the type of masculine features we have. I may be wrong but that's my thinking although I have never buzzed/shaved.

 

[CaptainForehead]

I don't lift heavy, mainly to maintain but also I don't want to risk injury as I enjoy playing sport. You don't want to stress out your musculoskeletal system too much.

Too late for for me - I permanently injured my back a few years back. Due to genetic resistance to gaining stength, I have had to go balls out to get stronger(not be weak). Many injuries along the way. But I was not aware back injuries are permanent. Hello permanent pain.

It just sucks to struggle in every facet of my life just to be barely average. Perhaps this is why facial aesthetics are important. If someone is bald by 21, has a girly voice, soft face, weak eyebrows, perhaps these all are screaming "shiity genes, don't reproduce with him".

It kills me that barely high school educated grocery store cashiers have a better life than me because of their genes.

 

[Wolf Pack]

Too late for for me - I permanently injured my back a few years back. Due to genetic resistance to gaining stength, I have had to go balls out to get stronger(not be weak). Many injuries along the way. But I was not aware back injuries are permanent. Hello permanent pain.

It just sucks to struggle in every facet of my life just to be barely average. Perhaps this is why facial aesthetics are important. If someone is bald by 21, has a girly voice, soft face, weak eyebrows, perhaps these all are screaming "shiity genes, don't reproduce with him".

It kills me that barely high school educated grocery store cashiers have a better life than me because of their genes.

From what you describe, you have a very tough situation. But don't read too much into "don't reproduce with him" not a good mentality to have. As much as people discuss all kinds of detailed stuff on this website, remember everyone can get someone. That's a fact. You see all kinds of couples. It's about acceptance, enjoying what you can. Worry for things that you can change.

You can do tons of body weight exercises to failure if you can't lift weights. Take up a hobby and excel in it. Try something new. You can improve the way you project yourself with clothes, grooming, subtle tattoos, a transplant of some sort or system. Never give up on life otherwise what's the point living?

Yes facial structure is very important for many things but it's not the be all and end all and not an automatic route to happiness. Don't be hard on yourself is all I am saying. Have you tried meeting new girls even online?

 

[MI92]

Yeah I agree with Wolfpack, if weight training/powerlifting/bodybuilding is not a major thing in your life, no point in lifting heavy all the time. Light to moderate for "maintenance" especially if you're doing other sports.

@Forehead
Sounds regrettable man, sorry to hear. Back injuries can me real nasty. All the best.

 

[shookwun]

lifting heavy is for idiots. By the way lifting heavy is relative between person too person. Lifting adequate weight enough to induce a progressive over load, time under tension, and actually activating is all that's needed for growth. This is what I would call lifting 'heavy'. Once the overload is achieved all that is needed to to pump the muscle, and stretch the fascia.

This throwing weight is the funniest crap I see in the gym all the time. These same people look like garbage all year, but they have these so called numbers right? Not rele. How you can properly gauge the weight when the ROM is always different and their's no actual progress. The so called strength gains tend to fluctuate as they say from what they eat apparently but in fact they could never lift said weight properly to begin with. Then they will go on about not wanting to cut because they will loose gains LOL. How can you loose something you never gained to begin with. When they do cut weight, it's all fat and then reality is in their eyes of how small they ACTUALLY ARE.


Bodybuilding is all drugs. The sooner you can accept this the faster your mind will be at ease. Strength gains naturally are typically maxed out within a couple years of training, and drugs are needed to actually get bigger, and stronger. That fat, and water bloof isn't gains! Actuall muscle tissue takes years to develop, and even on steroids takes a long time to gain.


Don't get me wrong, a great body can be built naturally. But it will be nothing like someone on gear who knows what they're doing. Most naturals will look stringy when they're lean, but can get to low body fat. Depending on bone structure it can look good or bad. That or becoming the infamous perma bulker, the water logged trash that walks around thinking they are big, with big power lifts but infact are quite small. This group tends to be the over weight fat kids or mesos who don't have a hard time putting on weight that put on a bit of muscle and bloof and are suddenly massive in their own eyes.


Oh and cycles are the most retarded thing ever. Imagine shutting down your whole hormone system, then kick starting it. repeating the process. Their is only ON, and not OFF if you want to gain muscle and look like you lift. When you're ready to come off then it' time to start taking the ancillery drugs, but this cycling is even worse on the body then staying on. It'll take months to fix the damage. In fact staying on TRT levels for those over 35 is better then being a natural with low tesosterone.

 

[MI92]

^I went on with the intention to blast and cruise, not cycling. Then some time later decided to come off as it turned out it wasn't for me. I'm 23 now, so I hopefully should recover to a reasonable extent, will take a while. Been off since April/May. Don't intend to go on again (bar TRT possibly in the future). If I hit the jackpot then I would ideally run low dose GH year round for health and cosmetic purpose.

Agree with everything you said. Lifting heavy with crap form, not only do you risk injury but you are not properly stimulating muscle fibers for ideal hypertrophy. I was obsessed with "getting big" and had that squat-or-die attitude and looking like I lift in clothing is everything. Looking small would have my ego take a massive hit. But I'm a lot happier now, I've overcome my body dysmorphia thankfully (though I started losing my hair around this time lol). Yeah I may look small and DYEL in a shirt, but I won't be embarrassed taking off my top at the beach and I feel and look a lot healthier, my blood work I assume is better too.

 

[RoyD]

remember everyone can get someone.

haha not true. I can't get any.

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Coming to body building I barely ever skip a day ever since I noticed that I was actually going bald! Have to say there have been times where I've thought I'll just quit and do something like study a little more or play football which I enjoy more. But baldness has been my biggest motivation. I'm not that good looking to begin with and my hair has just made it worse for me. If I try losing weight I just look skinny and weak. If I try putting on weight I get a big belly. My genes are just ****ed up that way. That's why body building is my only hope of looking decent or even remotely attractive.

Being short, bald AND fat will just have me doomed. Nothing I can do about the first two but hell I have to do whatever it takes to avoid the third.

 

[Exodus2011]

how tall are you royd?

5'6 and 125 here

 

[Wolf Pack]

haha not true. I can't get any

Unless you're a dwarf, severe mental disability, elephant man or so fat you can't get out of bed, you should be able to get someone.

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lifting heavy is for idiots. By the way lifting heavy is relative between person too person. Lifting adequate weight enough to induce a progressive over load, time under tension, and actually activating is all that's needed for growth. This is what I would call lifting 'heavy'. Once the overload is achieved all that is needed to to pump the muscle, and stretch the fascia.

This throwing weight is the funniest crap I see in the gym all the time. These same people look like garbage all year, but they have these so called numbers right? Not rele. How you can properly gauge the weight when the ROM is always different and their's no actual progress. The so called strength gains tend to fluctuate as they say from what they eat apparently but in fact they could never lift said weight properly to begin with. Then they will go on about not wanting to cut because they will loose gains LOL. How can you loose something you never gained to begin with. When they do cut weight, it's all fat and then reality is in their eyes of how small they ACTUALLY ARE.


Bodybuilding is all drugs. The sooner you can accept this the faster your mind will be at ease. Strength gains naturally are typically maxed out within a couple years of training, and drugs are needed to actually get bigger, and stronger. That fat, and water bloof isn't gains! Actuall muscle tissue takes years to develop, and even on steroids takes a long time to gain.


Don't get me wrong, a great body can be built naturally. But it will be nothing like someone on gear who knows what they're doing. Most naturals will look stringy when they're lean, but can get to low body fat. Depending on bone structure it can look good or bad. That or becoming the infamous perma bulker, the water logged trash that walks around thinking they are big, with big power lifts but infact are quite small. This group tends to be the over weight fat kids or mesos who don't have a hard time putting on weight that put on a bit of muscle and bloof and are suddenly massive in their own eyes.


Oh and cycles are the most retarded thing ever. Imagine shutting down your whole hormone system, then kick starting it. repeating the process. Their is only ON, and not OFF if you want to gain muscle and look like you lift. When you're ready to come off then it' time to start taking the ancillery drugs, but this cycling is even worse on the body then staying on. It'll take months to fix the damage. In fact staying on TRT levels for those over 35 is better then being a natural with low tesosterone.

So much truth here. Hypertrophy training is all about using the full ROM, TUT and getting that pump. You know that means blood flow has increased at the local level.

 

[xetudor]

RoyD, unless you get steroids, you won't look big with clothes ones. You would be healthier and have a pleasant body with your shirt off but it won't change the way you look when walking down the street (considering low fat percent before lifting). I'm not saying you should get juiced or stop going to the gym but you should keep that in mind.

Women love a six pack and some would even want to touch it when they see it but how many times do you get that chance? Maybe being in India helps as it's always hot there.

 

[uncomfortable man]

You have to pretend not to care. You are socially contracted and obligated to hold up a wall of denial and ignore our feelings so that the privilaged full jeads dont have any moments of discomfort. Heaven forbid. And cut out all this workout talk. If I want to hear that shiz I would go to a bodybuilding forum.

 

[CaptainForehead]

remember everyone can get someone. That's a fact. You see all kinds of couples. It's about acceptance, enjoying what you can. Worry for things that you can change.

True, but I have to like the other person back. I'm not restricting myself to models, but the girl has to be somewhat attractive.

You can do tons of body weight exercises to failure if you can't lift weights. Take up a hobby and excel in it. Try something new. You can improve the way you project yourself with clothes, grooming, subtle tattoos, a transplant of some sort or system. Never give up on life otherwise what's the point living?

I still lift weights, and have a couple of other endeavors going on, so I haven't given up. It just sucks that guys who put in 20% of the effort I do have it easier than I do.

Don't be hard on yourself is all I am saying. Have you tried meeting new girls even online?

It's difficult not to be hard on oneself given that the world is hard on me. I haven't tried meeting girls online recently.

Thanks for caring though, and for trying to lift me up.

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And cut out all this workout talk. If I want to hear that shiz I would go to a bodybuilding forum.

Impact of hairloss. Working out becomes a necessity for many of us.

 

[paulsharon]

constantly

i always pretend not to care

 

[Dench57]

I agree with Hellouser. I tried talking to my family about it, and it made it worse. They just laughed it off, and told me not to worry about it (thats pretty much all they can say).. no one can understand unless that person is going through it as well (which can be said about any situation).
As far as bodybuilding, I personally think more girls dig it when a guy is lean. Yeah you still have muscles, but not like those huge *** guys. I dont think it is worth it to go down that road, unless you are really passionate about bodybuilding.

I tried talking to my parents about it recently, because I'm still a NW2 they think I'm paranoid or something. My dad is a NW3-3.5, but I guess because he got happily married in his 20s, it just didn't affect his life as much. I find it really interesting how some people can just accept it, even though they look so much worse, whereas I just cannot and will never accept it. Maybe that makes me weird, it probably says a lot about my self-confidence and insecurities, and how much of my identity is based on something so "superficial" as hair.

I've never spoken about it to anyone outside these forums before, mostly because all my friends are perfect NW0's and they just cannot understand the physical and mental anguish.

I find it hard to motivate myself to go to the gym anymore. I personally think it's a lot of effort, committing to a cleaner diet and hitting the gym 4-5 times a week. I'll be honest and say the main reason I went to the gym was for aesthetic reasons - to feel more confident in myself and ultimately to look better for girls. But when you've got aggressive hairloss...it seems to so futile. With the effort it takes...every inch I painstakingly add to my arms or chest, I lose off my hairline. And you can be damn sure which inch matters 10x more. I know it's obviously better to be ripped and balding than skinny and balding....but both suck!

 

[blackg]

Yep..pretending is all we got. Ya know, I hate, and I mean really fucqin hate windy days. I used to walk around with my head down (hiding my disgusting forehead and freakish recession, now with very noticeable thinning) when walking in the wind.

But now, with the help from this forum, I at least try to hold my head up and make it appear I'm confident and comfortable with myself.
Pretend, pretend, pretend. That's all it is, but it's a lot easier to do when I can read these forums.
Even read them when I'm out walking.

On occasion I will chuck a cap on...but I feel like such a ****in fraud!!

I get so angry sometimes.I find myself looking at all the Norwood-0's (the O is for oblivious) blissfully walking around with their heads held up, even in ****y wind, or they run their fingers through their hair just to give it some extra bounce, then there off.
Obliviously walking on their merry little journey.... and all I can think about is "Right, what can I smash up and where can I do it, without being arrested! "

 

[Dench57]

I get so angry sometimes.I find myself looking at all the Norwood-0's (the O is for oblivious) blissfully walking around with their heads held up, even in ****y wind, or they run their fingers through their hair just to give it some extra bounce, then there off.
Obliviously walking on their merry little journey.... and all I can think about is "Right, what can I smash up and where can I do it, without being arrested! "

Haha I do this all the time, looking at NW0's and getting angry. They have no ****ing idea how lucky they were. I certainly didn't before this **** happened to me.

A year ago that was me, the guy running his hand through his full head of hair. Now my hair physically hurts when it's windy because the scalp pain is so bad.

 

[Exodus2011]

i know how you guys feel. it honestly seems like norwood 1s are another species now lolz.

such a simple thing lol, looking normal.

 

[FlopTurnRiver]

Delusion is better than depression.

 

[RoyD]

Exodus: Well I'm 5'7" and weigh 76 kgs. Pre gyming I was like 67 kgs maybe.
Wolfpack: In that case yes I can get laid with someone who is a dwarf, severe mental disability, elephant woman or so fat you can't get out of bed.
xetudor: I go to the gym to stay fit, not to get big! I don't even take any supplements. I just want to look fit and you can do that even clothes on. Besides, at 5'7" I'd look funny if I put on a lot of muscle.