Hair blogs got me depressed

[qball01]

dude...I'm 21 years old with bad diffuse thinning and some receeding....I keep my head shaved with a razor or clippers regularly....I PRACTICALLY AM BALD....at least to the real world which doesnt differentiate between NW3's and Norwood 6's....

Your not bald, your not even close, *maybe* nw1.5.
and yes, you have no idea what you are talking about, there is a HUGE diffrent between nw3 and nw6. :jackit:

actually...I have a weird balding pattern...a lot of the thinning is also due to to scarring alopecia but I won't get into that...

fact is, I'm prbly a Norwood 2-3 in terms of the recession and the crown is MUCH thinner than the sides...I cannot grow it out for very long before it starts to look pretty obvious. You can't be serious...you're saying that the difference between me living a good life and one where I'm persecuted comes down to what amounts to some dots of stubble on my head, that are barely visible to begin with? You can't be serious! A 21 year old in my position IS the equivalent of a 30 something year old Norwood 5-6. There is virtually NOBODY out there in my position...everybody has at least some hair and those who shave it, buzz it to a 2 guard with nearly perfect hairlines (I'm assuming you think this is more or less what I look like which isn't true). Nevertheless that still hasn't held me back socially UNLESS I let it.

and for the record...I know there IS a big difference between Norwood 3 and 6 in terms of being able to grow and style hair....but if its shaved down with a razor (not just buzzed once every 10 days with clippers like some people) regularly then NO...there is hardly a difference. Real people do not distinguish...they don't know that Ami James is balder than Chris Daughtry and Kelly Slater but not as bald as Billy Zane or Patrick Stewart...to them BALD IS BALD.

 

[uncomfortable man]

Real people do not distinguish...they don't know that Ami James is balder than Chris Daughtry and Kelly Slater but not as bald as Billy Zane or Patrick Stewart...to them BALD IS BALD.

All they know is that bald is bad. And there is a difference between an nw1 who uses a razor to shave his head and an nw6 who does the same thing. You can still see the shadow where your hairline is and it still frames your face, where the nw6 still has an obvious horseshoe no matter how far down he shaves. It is never the same. This is why I was considering head tattooing to make it look like I have stubble up there and at least have something to frame my f*****g face. Qball, if you were to wake up one morning as an nw5 like me and look in the mirror and see for yourself how not having any hairline to frame your face distorts and deforms your proportions and just how shitty it makes you look in general, then you just might panic and all of your being bald isn't so bad rhetoric will fly right out the window.

 

[qball01]

its not like I'm looking forward to being a Norwood 6...I like being able to leave my hair for a few days rather than needing to shave it daily....but Uman...the whole framing your face thing doesn't hold as much merit in the real world as it does to you and other bald guys. Sure...I have a thin, light shadow but its really not noticeable, ESPECIALLY after I use the razor. Pluss, in any picture taken of me the hairline gets washed out and I look BALD..and guess what..I still look fine! Being the vain man I am I've posted my pictures on Hotornot and get anywhere from a low 9 to a 9.9, depending on the picture...and I also have a very big head...size 7 and 5/8 at least for a hat. Point is...having no hairline is not going to automatically kill your looks!

You really can't argue that the difference between a shadow and no shadow makes a big enough difference to change how somebody is perceived and how they live their life. THAT is BDD. The fact is, if somebody has a nice face, it will remain that way even when its fully shaved down with no hair on top. Look at guys like Ami James, billy Zane (when he doesnt grow out the sides and look Bozoish) Graham Shiels, Kevin Youklis, Gabe Kapler, Matt Holliday, Andre Agassi, Kelly Slater, Carlo Rota, and of course..Bruce. Those are all very bald guys who shave it and IMO look perfectly fine! Better yet..those are all guys who many (of course not EVERY, but MANY) women find very attractive...even attractive women. Seriously..look up those guys and tell me that theres something wrong with them. The "BALD IS BAD' comment is dumb because even though it may not make sense to you or me...those guys are considered attractive by a lot of women. I know a lot of girls who think Ami James is extremely hot and hes prbly more bald than you in the Norwood scale. Please stop making it out to seem that all bald men are considered lesser and unattractive. It ISN'T the truth at all.

 

[cuebald]

I'd say about 5% of NW5's look good.
The rest look laughable.

The fact you get 9+ on "Hotornot" proves that either you're one of those 5%, or you really are just a NW1.5 (I suspect the latter).
Care to post a link?

 

[Ian Curtis]

Uman, you should find a bald therapist, so you won't get offended when he gives you advice, and at the same time you would be helping yourself. I mean it.

 

[qball01]

I'd say about 5% of NW5's look good.
The rest look laughable.

The fact you get 9+ on "Hotornot" proves that either you're one of those 5%, or you really are just a NW1.5 (I suspect the latter).
Care to post a link?

lol...ok if you don't believe me....not the best picture, but got a high rating and any shadow of a hairline has been washed out

http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/3904 ... rrrrrr.jpg

 

[uncomfortable man]

I wouldn't rely on a site like that to measure your physical attractiveness. It's like when I used to post on Yahoo Answers. You will see a bunch of beauty queen responses to a man's question about weather he is still attractive bald (you know, beauty is on the inside/looks don't matter) and then these same women are bashing bald dudes in another thread. People are so full of sh*t...they will tell you want you want to hear and then talk sh*t about you behind your back. Most people judge you by how you look. Most everyone thinks that baldness is some sort of no no...so most people regard and treat a bald man with less respect than an nw1. I can testify to this poor treatment. I've been laughed at, heckled, insulted, rejected, bullied you name it. All because these people think I am inferior to them because I am bald. It IS that simple.

 

[qball01]

...Andre Agassi...

Interesting how he got dumped by the supermodel when his horseshoe kicked in and he had to start head-shaving :dunno:

Anyways, qball01, you would crap your pants if you woke up as a NW5 or 6 one day, looked in the mirror.

Like EVERY guy that this happens to, you will say to yourself "WTF is wrong with me? My God, I look like a bald 60 year old man! I don't feel 60, because I'm only 25 (or however old you are), but I sure do have the hair of a 60 year old man! Damn!"

And that's about the gist of it. When you reach NW5/6 that is what you do and say to yourself in the mirror EVERY F*CKEN DAY!

Then, you stop looking in the mirror altogether; then, you start avoiding social situations; then, you become a loner, and then you can't get any trim, etc...it goes on and on. some guys never recover from this - I am still struggling with it myself.

No matter what, you look in the mirror and there is your bald head, and it NEVER changes unless you do something "drastic" and those types of things, such as hair transplant's and systems have some MAJOR drawbacks.

You have to learn how to live with your hair that way as a bald man, otherwise it will drive you into your grave.

But, I can tell you, acceptance is a VERY HARD PILL to swallow, and it doesn't happen overnight. So, telling somebody, who has had the full force of male pattern baldness dumped on them at a young age, to "cowboy up, man up, etc..." is kinda messed up.

male pattern baldness is not easy to deal with - period. That is why we are all here.

1) Agassi was balding badly WHEN THEY MARRIED....if you honestly believe that the reason they divorced came down to him being bald....then I LAUGH at you my friend. I also love how you outline exactly what happens to EVERY bald guy when they go bald...yup, they all become socially reclusive cave dwellers who can barely stand to see the light of day, haha.

and as for U-man...I don't even know what to say besides the fact your mind is just plain warped. I WISH I could see what you see but out in the real world I have not gotten the conclusion that bald men are treated any differently for the most part...I know plently of them and if some of them are perceived negatively then it sure as hell isn't because of baldness....hell, my friends know why I shave my head...I'm the only one whose even close to looking bald among them and I'm not treated inferior...I stand my ground and command respect...what could be construed as lighthearted/good-naturedl joking by most people is likely considered as "mocking, disrespecting and insulting" by you....

and while I know that a site like that isn't going to completely accurately gauge my attractiveness, it at least lets me know that I'm not viewed as some horribly ugly freak because I look bald....

 

[qball01]

well....

thats how he looked on their wedding day. If you really think baldness was the reason behind their divorce and a combination of many other reasons that often drive celebrity couples to early divorces then....I don't even know what to tell you.

And seriously...look at the link to the picture I posted. I may not be a NW6 but for 21...I'm pretty damn bald. I will NEVER be able to grow my hair out again...I will always have a shaved bald head...to the majority of NORMAL people...I look bald. Point is...I may not be all the way there yet but I'm sure as hell not one of those Norwood 1.5's with a nearly full head of hair preaching to other bald people....I do know what its like (somewhat) to be bald...I go to university and am virtually the only one in my position minus a couple...but I still get by.

 

[iwantperfection]

Its normal for young guys to overreact. The usual comments such as 'ill be bald in a month' type stuff come out. These guys come to learn there is so many more levels to hairloss than just thick hair and baldness. Its an adaption thing. Adapting to hair loss as it happens. Some will lose their hair eventually while others will get by with changing hairstyles through their life. Hairloss is a maturing process. As is the acceptance to deal with it. So yeah these guys are young and cry wolf alot but with how society is these days and how its becoming a fashionista mardi gra i dont blame them.

oh ..and hello again everyone.

 

[uncomfortable man]

but with how society is these days and how its becoming a fashionista mardi gra i dont blame them.

Good observation. Maybe in the future, there will be fashion police. and being bald or fat or ugly WILL be a crime. Youthinasia (?) will be commonplace as well. Welcome back IWP.

 

[Oknow]

I see some of these blogs, and honestly I do not see why they are even worried about their hair loss at all. It's like about 90% of them, are 20 somethings who are NW2's or 3's at the most - with very minimal loss. Very few (to almost none) of them are NW4, 5 or more. It's like they would really sh*t themselves if they had to live as a NW5 even for one day.

Being a Norwood 1.5 at 23, I will tell you what it is. It is the fear of the hairloss escalating to a NW3+ in 5-10 years.

How old are you UM?

 

[Oknow]

This site attracts "all kinds" with insecurities. Most of which stems from not liking what we see in the mirror. We spend too much time wishing we could look like a perfect male model with perfect hair and perfect skin, teeth, and body. Unfortunately, only a few men get those "gifts". However very few of those men with those "gifts" remain humble. The worst part is those "gifts" don't last forever and we lose them as we age. I look back and see my life has been wasted because all of my insecurities. The worst part is most people don't even notice most of those "flaws". I only notice them when I see someone else who has those "gifts" I feel I never received. This site actually cheers me up because I see more depressed and miserable people than I thought ever existed and most of those that chose to post their photos seem to be fairly average or above average looking. I realize I am not as alone as I thought. However, some of these guys are too young to feel the way I feel now and are just wasting the best years of their life worrying about their hair. I feel I may be a "lost cause" but some of you definitely are young enough to "turn your life around" and stop being so depressed over your hair. Hairloss sucks. However, Aging sucks ever more. Aging affects "everything" about you. Hairloss only affects just your "frame of your face". I totally understand CCS and how he feels try to achieve "perfection". However, unless you have the genetics for it, even plastic surgery is not going to make it happen. Genetics are impossible to beat. If we could beat it with drugs, then we would not need this forum. However, this forum is the best place to vent and be depressed. Its ironic how many people can give great advice but never seem to follow it themselves. So as long as we have hairloss, we will always read about depressing blogs. It a cycle that will never end even if there is cure for hair loss.

My god Dr House, that is exactly how my late teens/early 20s fucked up. Same thought patterns as you, Im interested...what do you do for a living?

 

[DoctorHouse]

I give free advice on a hair loss forum....................................................... :whistle:

 

[uncomfortable man]

I give free advice on a hair loss forum....................................................... :whistle:

And a good job at that he does. Future moderator material right there if you ask me. Maybe you could be my shrink House...if you can handle my being resentful of you for having a full head of hair. :woot:

 

[DoctorHouse]

UM, if I can make a difference in your life and make it better for you it would be an honor. You can feel resentful that I have a full head of hair ,but trust me, it does not in any way make my life any better. My struggle with BDD only makes it worse.

 

[HatPrisoner91]

UM, if I can make a difference in your life and make it better for you it would be an honor. You can feel resentful that I have a full head of hair ,but trust me, it does not in any way make my life any better. My struggle with BDD only makes it worse.

But isnt that worse? To have BDD without an actual real issue like having no hair?

 

[uncomfortable man]

Hey, if I lived in a world where almost every man had a horseshoe and full heads of hair were rare and therefore seen as unusual, then I would obviously be living in an opposite universe where women covet my attention and people admire and respect me by the shine off my horseshoe and all of the other luxuries that come with what it means to be considered normal, if not attractive. But that would be for an episode of the Twilight Zone. :shock:

 

[uncomfortable man]

I'm sorry to say this and you know I respect you and I hope you can forgive me but I also have BDD IN ADDITION TO a glaring visable physical flaw. You may not like what you see when you look in the mirror but you don't see a monster, you don't see Golum.

 

[Smooth]

you don't see Golum.

Argh dude.... get the f*** outa here, we've seen your picture already, what are you talking about?!?! your "physical situation" got you mentally ill, becoming obsessed with it, you look 10 times better then most bald guys i know (no homo!) you need to stop with the paranoia, people dont give a f*** about your head ! your not the first bald guy to walk this earth!! it sucks, i know because im going down that path, but other then some b****s here and there that give me a face (f*** them!) there is not much of a diffrence in peoples attitude....
I think you need try talking with a professional, this is going too far... even for you!