I can't believe it

doublebatman

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IF and that is a big IF he is getting treated like he says, then yes I can see his frustration. Although I would agree that bald people get disrespected, the stuff he describes is pretty extreme. I don't lock myself up in my house at all so I am exposed to society on daily basis and I just don't see what he describes at all, and believe me I am very observant. I just don't see constant abuse of bald guys, especially bald guys that are 40. Being bald at 40 really isn't that unusual. Maybe if he was in high school or college I could see this happening and pretty often, but he is not. I am not saying that he hasn't been **** on over the years, I am sure he has, but many of his posts put emphasis on how he is reading how people are looking at him and thoughts and **** like that. Yes they could be turned off by baldness. I know how baldness is looked down upon, but they could also be turned off by lack of style, being short, facial hair, or just being plain unattractive.

If people really **** on bald people on a daily basis like this fights would be breaking out every day which does not happen.

Joan when was the last time you have seen a bald guy being abused like the way he describes? In your post you bolded "EVERY DAY" so tell me when was the last time you have actually seen something like he has described? Let me answer that for you...NEVER. So don't even try to validate somebody's point without even witnessing it yourself. Again, I am not saying that it doesn't happen every now and then, because it does, but it highly doubt it is a daily event and it if is like others have said he needs to move. AGAIN 40yo bald guy. Is this really that shocking?

Good post.

The pattern I tend to see here is that experiences tend to be generalised too much.
I personally don't buy into all the BS that every single woman on the planet hates bald men and is only after a six figure salary and 9 inch penis due to some survey, crap article or stupid YouTube video fished from the bowels of the internet.
(Yes yes... I know I'm uglier without hair and my dating is more restricted etc.. but to say no woman will ever desire a bald man is absolute bollocks)

I agree though, there probably are people who have awful experiences of balding due to their specific environment.. and I feel for them, but I could read the same story with balding replaced with acne, ginger hair, height, facial disfigurements, personality disorders... The list goes on...

These crappy experiences aren't exclusive to balding men.. sometimes all it takes is being slightly different... It depends on where you are and who/what you are dealing with

Personally, I've found the process of going bald easier to deal with than severe acne at high school. Age, company, support networks, life experience, family etc... All things that will influence your experience and how you react/cope.
There's too many factors to list.
 

Wolf Pack

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IF and that is a big IF he is getting treated like he says, then yes I can see his frustration. Although I would agree that bald people get disrespected, the stuff he describes is pretty extreme. I don't lock myself up in my house at all so I am exposed to society on daily basis and I just don't see what he describes at all, and believe me I am very observant. I just don't see constant abuse of bald guys, especially bald guys that are 40. Being bald at 40 really isn't that unusual. Maybe if he was in high school or college I could see this happening and pretty often, but he is not. I am not saying that he hasn't been **** on over the years, I am sure he has, but many of his posts put emphasis on how he is reading how people are looking at him and thoughts and **** like that. Yes they could be turned off by baldness. I know how baldness is looked down upon, but they could also be turned off by lack of style, being short, facial hair, or just being plain unattractive.

If people really **** on bald people on a daily basis like this fights would be breaking out every day which does not happen.

Joan when was the last time you have seen a bald guy being abused like the way he describes? In your post you bolded "EVERY DAY" so tell me when was the last time you have actually seen something like he has described? Let me answer that for you...NEVER. So don't even try to validate somebody's point without even witnessing it yourself. Again, I am not saying that it doesn't happen every now and then, because it does, but it highly doubt it is a daily event and it if is like others have said he needs to move. AGAIN 40yo bald guy. Is this really that shocking?

Damnnn, still I can't rep you. Yesterday I wanted to write the same thing to Joan, that how do you know what UC says really happens and it isn't part of his anxiety and imagination? It just seems too far fetched. Then I thought screw writing it as there really is no point.

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Some women won't mind, but they're the exception, not the rule.

I'm sick of some people using these examples of how they know a guy who knows a girl that married a cueball.

This doesn't mean anything and even these guys make it look like an exceptional story without even realising it.

I'll question uncomfortable man when I will be able to go outside, spot 100 couples and see 50 women with bald guys and 50 women with NW1 guys.

Unfortunately, this is not reality, when I'm with my best friend, 1 time out of 100 couples, I will say to my friend: "Look man! Hope!"

But UC doesn't just talk about the dating scene I think, he said all his co workers look down on him (male, female, different ages) because he is bald. Outside of dating, I don't think supermarket workers or any job for that matter, will be like "hey look at that loser bald 40 year old, lets abuse him." He has deeper issues and problems with social interaction irrespective of baldness and that has probably led to a frosty relationship socially. The quicker he addresses real issues, while working on a transplant too, the quicker he will improve. If he keeps burying his head in the sand it will get him no where.

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I will def say UC has it worse so Im not taking that from him by any means.
I wouldnt say My situation is "awful" ... I mean I Have both limbs and no noticable tumors growing on my face but the situations I would say are "frustrating".... frustrating is a good word. I think UC painted himself into a corner, he needs to get out of working in a supermarket at 40+, unless hes a manager or something. Why not go into a trade? I know it seems late but really its DIFFERENT world in trades.

Do you work in trade? So you mean like a broker? Do you need a relevant degree for this? I do think he should do some sort of course for higher training in an area of his choice.

Frustration? For me it's currently an annoyance but I could see it getting worse if he hairs fall away.
 

doublebatman

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Some women won't mind, but they're the exception, not the rule.

I'm sick of some people using these examples of how they know a guy who knows a girl that married a cueball.

This doesn't mean anything and even these guys make it look like an exceptional story without even realising it.

I'll question uncomfortable man when I will be able to go outside, spot 100 couples and see 50 women with bald guys and 50 women with NW1 guys.

Unfortunately, this is not reality, when I'm with my best friend, 1 time out of 100 couples, I will say to my friend: "Look man! Hope!"

It works both ways I guess.

In reality of an average 100 couples (age 18-55) you'd probably see most with hair between norwood 1 and 3.. But that's more to do with the fact that many people don't bald further than that. If you look at couples in their late 50s/60s you'd probably find that loads of them are visibly balding (nw4+)

If 50% of men went bald at 18 the 50/50 split would be much closer
 

Notcoolanymore

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Hair loss is a joke to many people that are not dealing with it. I remember during the first stages, I would get comments about my receding hair line. Now that my hair is much worse and I have a huge area on my crown that is thin, I know for a fact that people will make comments and talk ****. It's just the way some people are, they can be IDIOTS. Especially if you are good in every other way, they need to find a way to bring you down. With that being said if you are dealing with constant abuse every day and people are making a mockery out of you on a regular basis, then there is most likely something else going on. I guess anything is possible, but I have just never seen it happen. Personally if it was me and I was being treated that way I would move and get a fresh start. I am speaking from experience since I did move to a different state when I was 23. Best decision I ever made.

Of course I am talking about the average bald guy. Not some kid in high school or even college dealing with hair loss.
 

winnyblues

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Thats why you need to surround yourself with good people. My friends never say anything about my hair. And if some random says something well ****it they dont know you so shouldnt care what they think
 

uncomfortable man

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As usual, people misinterperet what I say. First off, I feel like slitting their throat and actually doing it are two different things. Secondly, im not shi77ing on bald people and calling them undesireables, im calling out the ones who are shi77ing on me for being bald. There is no denying that there is a social stigma against baldness. If baldness was as accepted as you seem to think it is, then you wouldnt be on sites like this taking medications and planning hair transplants, would you? Third, as i've said before, people arent throwing tomatoes at me but rather insulting looks. Just because it is more subtle, doesnt mean it isnt there and i've already admitted to being sensitive to this shi7. Someone else may or may not handle my situation better if in my shoes, but to assume that this is all just a big delusion is a mistake. like not cool said, people can be idiots and i'm an easy target and seem to attract them... combined with my inability "to just not care", makes it difficult to live. Dont understand?**The few here who have experienced real baldness do understand since they have been through their own humiliating experiences ... and have been traimed as such to see straight through peoples bull****. So sorry if not having hair opens my eyes to ugly truths that others are too privaliged to see. Doubt me all you want though, if that fatefull day ever happens to you, then you too will notice the change In how people percieve and treat you, with less respect. As i've described before, being bald is like having a scarlett letter, it is a very clear signal that carries strong connotations of being a looser... as evidenced in that recent uk ad, and countless others like it. It is a bad rep that is hard to shake, because no matter what you do people will always be critical of you because of this one superficial feature. And no its not like having acne... you dont see movie villains and loosers be consistently portrayed as as having bad acne.
 

doublebatman

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There is no denying that there is a social stigma against baldness. If baldness was as accepted as you seem to think it is, then you wouldnt be on sites like this taking medications and planning hair transplants, would you?

Actually yes I would... Much like I had acne or other conditions that supposedly aren't stigmatised I would still want to improve my appearance and confidence. I want to look the best that I can and if involves working out, taking medications or even going for a hair transplant then so be it.
 

Exodus2011

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Yes, our plague can be summed up to this in the end:

"Bald = he must be a loser"

I've always been kind of a "loser", even before hair loss.

I was the shy guy who was awkward socially with people and especially women.

One of the first thought that came to my mind when I was told I was balding at the age of 19:

"Great, not only am I a loser now, but people will get a clear signal that I'm one before I even open my mouth."
i can relate to this so much.

being a loser, and then going bald on top of it was and still is ****ing horrible.

it kinda makes me feel like there is some sort of troll god that is there to just to keep me down.
 

uncomfortable man

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Actually yes I would... Much like I had acne or other conditions that supposedly aren't stigmatised I would still want to improve my appearance and confidence. I want to look the best that I can and if involves working out, taking medications or even going for a hair transplant then so be it.
Maybe consciously you are doing it for yourself. Subcosnsciously you are trying to look your best for others both to garnish acceptance and at the same time avoid ridicule. I dont believe anyone who says they dont care what others think. Human beings are hardwired to be social creatures. No, man is an island.
 

VeprSuper

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Maybe consciously you are doing it for yourself. Subcosnsciously you are trying to look your best for others both to garnish acceptance and at the same time avoid ridicule. I dont believe anyone who says they dont care what others think. Human beings are hardwired to be social creatures. No, man is an island.
Well said and true.
 

bilboswaggins

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i can relate to this so much.

being a loser, and then going bald on top of it was and still is ****ing horrible.

it kinda makes me feel like there is some sort of troll god that is there to just to keep me down.

same for me I was also kind of a loser in high school. well maybe not a total loser... I had friends etc but was antisocial and didn't make an effort to talk with girls.
Uni was like a fresh start I met heaps of ppl and then male pattern baldness kicked it. Like wtf??? Just when things going well, it's like the universe says "Yeahhhhh.......NO."
 

doublebatman

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Maybe consciously you are doing it for yourself. Subcosnsciously you are trying to look your best for others both to garnish acceptance and at the same time avoid ridicule. I dont believe anyone who says they dont care what others think. Human beings are hardwired to be social creatures. No, man is an island.

Maybe.

Having gone from a 'full head' to more or less bald in a few years I just don't see the level of what you describe. I don't see the looks of disgust or disapproval, I don't notice people treating me any differently... I don't feel like a second class citizen or any less of a human being since balding.

Sure, women aren't as attracted to me, but that's because balding and aging has made me objectively uglier. If I was a girl I would find younger me much more attractive.
 
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Its the facial hair(same as me). Being bald is the catalyst of course, but when you are bald, having facial hair is not seen as a style, positive change of appearance, following the latest fad etc(when you have hair), its seen as making oneself even more uglier, compensating, upside down head etc etc etc
Here in the Uk, most bald men are clean shaven....
 

zdm632

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Its the facial hair(same as me). Being bald is the catalyst of course, but when you are bald, having facial hair is not seen as a style, positive change of appearance, following the latest fad etc(when you have hair), its seen as making oneself even more uglier, compensating, upside down head etc etc etc
Here in the Uk, most bald men are clean shaven....

No, it's not a general thing, some baldies look way better with properlt groomed facial hair(short and nice contour, not let it grow too much), others simply look their best with a shaven face, etc.
For example,in my case, facial hair makes me look more mature. With a razor shave, i look too young and "innocent", and i don't like that.

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Maybe consciously you are doing it for yourself. Subcosnsciously you are trying to look your best for others both to garnish acceptance and at the same time avoid ridicule. I dont believe anyone who says they dont care what others think. Human beings are hardwired to be social creatures. No, man is an island.

Yes, of course you must CARE what others think, otherwise you could go in the street in pijamas or naked, etc.
But, it is not good to obsess too much on what other think, to the point that it consumes you 24/24.
In the end, we cannot be loved/liked by ALL the people it would be completely stupid to desire such a thing.
And, with baldness, come on,it is something that we have little to no control over it, only stupid/evil people would ridicule baldness.
If they do it, leave them.
Anyway, all the problems and the pain can go if someone accepts baldness. And it's not nonsense, according to statistics, 30-50% of bald men have accepted their hair situation and could care less if someone would make some remark about it or try to mock them.
Yes, it's hard to accept it when young(20-30), but as you step into 35-40-45 it should be the norm.
 

uncomfortable man

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Why are people suffering from "mere" male pattern baldness the subject of being made fun of? Because male pattern baldness is perceived as personal weakness and bad genetics, while an accident that burns the hair off isn't. People just suck.

regards
Kater Kahlohr

Regards indeed kahlohr. There arent to many people who see baldness objectively. Everyone loves to read into baldness... maybe he doesnt take care of himself. Maybe he is malnourished. Maybe he is perv, etc.
 

RoyD

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Yes, of course you must CARE what others think, otherwise you could go in the street in pijamas or naked, etc.
But, it is not good to obsess too much on what other think, to the point that it consumes you 24/24.
In the end, we cannot be loved/liked by ALL the people it would be completely stupid to desire such a thing.
And, with baldness, come on,it is something that we have little to no control over it, only stupid/evil people would ridicule baldness.
If they do it, leave them.
Anyway, all the problems and the pain can go if someone accepts baldness. And it's not nonsense, according to statistics, 30-50% of bald men have accepted their hair situation and could care less if someone would make some remark about it or try to mock them.
Yes, it's hard to accept it when young(20-30), but as you step into 35-40-45 it should be the norm.

There was this one guy in my college who was an ugly mofo, wore pajamas to college and looked like he didn't have a bath for a week ... Had a lot of girls around him though. NW1 of course :)
 
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