I feel like I am made of nothing but bad genetics.

[Thickandthin]

Born with terrible flat feet (my arches are convex rather than concave)
By 8 I was in glasses, vision has steadily gotten worse
I'm left handed (not really "bad" per se, but a disadvantage in society)
Had acne in my teens
Very prone to stretch marks, have them on my back, ***, thighs, knees, etc.
Introverted personality with tendency to become depressed, not talented at anything
Constant redness on cheeks due to apparent rosacea
And now the granddaddy of them all, a nice receding hairline (NW2.5ish) at 22 years old.

I could live with everything else just fine, but the hairloss seems to effect me in a pretty profound way.
When my hair is wet and combed back right out of the shower, my receding hairline makes my already huge head look even bigger and more ridiculous. I've had a NW1.5 on one side since 16 or so, while the other side was NW1. Within the last year and a half the NW1.5 side went to a 2.5, and the 1 side went to a 2 with thinning in a 2.5 pattern. I used to spread my hair across my forehead from the NW1 side, but now it's pointless because it's the same as the other side.

Now, with all that said, I'm not terribly depressed by my situation. I've got a few good things going for me......I'm a decent height (6'0"), have a decently attractive face, and I have a "mesomorph" body type meaning I put on muscle very quickly. I also seem to be somewhat attractive to women, and have a pretty cute girlfriend. But at the same time I cannot help but look at all the crappy stuff I've dealt with over my short life and get down about it. If I started going bald at 40, even 30, I'd feel much better about things, but I honestly had about 3 years of not having to worry about my appearance (the time between my acne problem being over and hairloss becoming noticeable) and now I'm right back into that mindset.

I know I'm better off than a lot of people, but all these problems, particularly ones concerning my appearance, have taken a toll on my mental well being. I used to get so down about breakouts, but now they seem trivial considering their temporary nature compared to the slow, inevitable decline of balding. Sometimes when I comb my hair back taut I don't even recognize myself because of the recession. And the worst part is knowing it's only going to continue, and continue, and continue.

I have fincar coming in the mail and when I read the success stories forum I feel so much better about my situation and am filled with hope that it will do the trick and thicken things up and maintain for years to come. But then I start reading in the other forums about how people are having massive shedding, losing ground, not regrowing, etc, and I feel completely defeated and hopeless. I don't want to have to shave my head. I don't want to have to get a hair transplant. I don't want to have to constantly be styling my hair in new ways to disguise my growing forehead. I don't want to watch my looks fade with every passing month and year. I don't want to look at every NW1 I see with envy, awe, anger, and feelings of inadequacy. I don't want to have to take a drug for the rest of my life just to delay the inevitable.........f*** it.

 

[ali777]

I know I'm better off than a lot of people...

Keep reminding yourself of this every morning....

Learn how to be content and your life will improve.

 

[Smooth]

I have fincar coming in the mail and when I read the success stories forum I feel so much better about my situation and am filled with hope that it will do the trick and thicken things up and maintain for years to come. But then I start reading in the other forums about how people are having massive shedding, losing ground, not regrowing, etc, and I feel completely defeated and hopeless. I don't want to have to shave my head. I don't want to have to get a hair transplant. I don't want to have to constantly be styling my hair in new ways to disguise my growing forehead. I don't want to watch my looks fade with every passing month and year. I don't want to look at every NW1 I see with envy, awe, anger, and feelings of inadequacy. I don't want to have to take a drug for the rest of my life just to delay the inevitable.........f*ck it.

I had the exact same feelings 2-3 years back (was about your age too) i tried to fight it with drugs also as you do, but the side effects got me, im alergic to rogaine, and cant take propecia cause it effecs the labido, nonetheless, i dont trust that company once'oever!
You can (and should) try to fight back with drugs (and i wish you the best and hope you will sucsseed); but you have to remeber, this things dont work for most people, so here is my advice for you; cry, moan, scream, kick, corss, break-down, and after you do all this start working on acceptance, imo this IS the best "cure" we have right now, I wish someone would pointed me at same direction when I started lossing my hair (people closest to me used to tell me its all in my head... .. well atleasr they tried, i give them that..). again, dont give up without a fight, I truely wish you a huge deal of success but (!) remeber, at the same time, that at least one person told at the beginning to start workng on acpetance (the sooner you start working on acceptance, the easier it will get, by the time you are nw4 you wouldnt care anymore).
gl.

 

[cruz]

I had the exact same feelings 2-3 years back (was about your age too) i tried to fight it with drugs also as you do, but the side effects got me, im alergic to rogaine, and cant take propecia cause it effecs the labido, nonetheless, i dont trust that company once'oever!
You can (and should) try to fight back with drugs (and i wish you the best and hope you will sucsseed); but you have to remeber, this things dont work for most people, so here is my advice for you; cry, moan, scream, kick, corss, break-down, and after you do all this start working on acceptance, imo this IS the best "cure" we have right now, I wish someone would pointed me at same direction when I started lossing my hair (people closest to me used to tell me its all in my head... .. well atleasr they tried, i give them that..). again, dont give up without a fight, I truely wish you a huge deal of success but (!) remeber, at the same time, that at least one person told at the beginning to start workng on acpetance (the sooner you start working on acceptance, the easier it will get, by the time you are nw4 you wouldnt care anymore).
gl.

I believe this is good advice - working on acceptance. I have been trying to accept my situation for many years now but am still not quite there yet, and to be honest, i'm not sure if i will be 'getting there' anytime soon. I guess i am bit weaker mentally than other guys, but i will keep trying.

To the OP - i can relate to the feeling of having bad genes. I went through some nasty acne breakouts during my teens, which has left me with mild-moderate scarring. The acne is only under control because of a multitude of creams that i have to apply which takes 20 minutes twice a day. Still, i am at least thankful that it is under control because the scarring is permanent and it had got to the point where every cyst would leave a scar.

I know I'm better off than a lot of people...

Keep reminding yourself of this every morning....

Learn how to be content and your life will improve.

This is good advice too. It can become very easy to get bitter and twisted over all this. I try to remind my self of the above as much as possible.

 

[ali777]

I know I'm better off than a lot of people...

Keep reminding yourself of this every morning....

Learn how to be content and your life will improve.

This is good advice too. It can become very easy to get bitter and twisted over all this. I try to remind my self of the above as much as possible.

I believe most of us that visit this site regularly have some sort of issues in life, hairloss just happens to be a trigger or an excuse. Someone confident and content with life wouldn't make such a big deal out of hairloss.

 

[fadgus]

This post really hit home, hahaha. There's two people in my circle of friends who wear glasses and one of them is me. I was the only one who had to wear braces because my teeth were so messed up. And now I'm the only one who's balding. However, I never let any of this stuff bring me down, in fact I think I'm really lucky compared to a lot of people, especially the ones who were born blind/disabled/mute/deaf.

 

[Thickandthin]

This post really hit home, hahaha. There's two people in my circle of friends who wear glasses and one of them is me. I was the only one who had to wear braces because my teeth were so messed up. And now I'm the only one who's balding. However, I never let any of this stuff bring me down, in fact I think I'm really lucky compared to a lot of people, especially the ones who were born blind/disabled/mute/deaf.

LOL - yeah, forgot to mention I was born with horrible teeth and required both a metal piece in the roof of my mouth to fix my cross bite (had it for about a year as a child, extremely painful and constantly getting food stuck in it, also gave me a slight lisp). Then once that was fixed I had braces for 2 1/2 years. Go me. unk:

 

[Hammer87]

I can sort of relate to this, I've not been lucky with my genes, wasn't great looking younger, spots, braces, glasses etc. And just when I was growing out of it all, becoming fairly attractive and getting girls I needed to worry about hairloss. It hasn't stopped me getting girls however.

Thickandthin, looking at your pics I don't think your hair is anywhere near the state you think it it's in. It's quite common that hairloss looks much worse to you than it does to others....

 

[SE-freak]

Bad Genetics? Your bad genetics carried your genes up to this day through the centuries. We are survivors (even the stupid-dumb-unrespectful for life-valueing only $$$ ones) and all have gifts, and not complying with the current socially generated aesthetical trends is the least one should worry about. Acceptance could be giving in, or could mean accepting the best of yourself and work to let that part breathe and surface. The first notion of the word is very dangerous, that is why I value hairloss treatments most. Regardless of treatments results, one has taken active measures, instead of getting himself to like his "new looks", feature a goate as distraction, comb over, wait for his friends to go bald too or believe it doesn't really matter.

Do not blame yout bad genes. An active stance is the best genetical treat.

 

[Thickandthin]

I can sort of relate to this, I've not been lucky with my genes, wasn't great looking younger, spots, braces, glasses etc. And just when I was growing out of it all, becoming fairly attractive and getting girls I needed to worry about hairloss. It hasn't stopped me getting girls however.

Thickandthin, looking at your pics I don't think your hair is anywhere near the state you think it it's in. It's quite common that hairloss looks much worse to you than it does to others....

Those pictures were from April. I've lost a some ground since then....

That's the worst part about hairloss. In April I would have killed to have the hair I had 6 months prior. Now in November I would kill to have the hair I had in April.

 

[Hammer87]

Fair enough.

Just remember your genetics could be a lot worse (I'm not going to start going into all the genetic diseases you could have had as it's not a fair comparison). At the rate you're going you may be noticeably balding at 30 - Which is relatively normal (Certainly not uncommon anyway). There are guys younger than you with half the hair, there will be guys with better hair than you now who will start balding incredibly rapidly in the future, leaving them with less hair than you.

In summary, you could be a lot worse off.

 

[ghg]

Ok, let's compare while we are at it:

-5'7" (171 cm)
-not really talented at anything, just ok in most things
-slight speech impediment
-only 4 fingers on right hand
-broken nose when I was 17
-almost non-existant hair on top now at 25 (only a month 'til I'm 26 though)
-not very attractive looking
-oblong head shape which makes the bald look pretty bad for me
-this I forgot originally: seborrheic dermatitis on face and scalp

But yeah, if I could fix only one thing I'd fix the slight speech impediment. It's the one that holds me back the most since I'm naturally very talkative type. I do realize that there's only one me though and I have friends who seem to like me for what I am so who gives a f***.

 

[s.a.f]

Its todays media thats causing the problem. Look around you are you surrounded by supermodels?
40% of the U.S are clinicly obese.
But turn on the tv or look in a magazine and everyones perfect.

Why are schoolgirls starving themselves now when they were'nt 20/30 yrs ago? Why are they looking to get boob jobs at 18?
Its the same for us not many bald/balding guys in Hollywood and the ones that are are usualy negativly portrayed.

As for me:

Severely short sighted since a young age wore milk bottle thick glasses until 19: (Now fixed with surgery probably the best money I ever spent)
Height 5'9" not tall but but average, have no issues with it.
Hairloss noticible at 19, NW3 at 25 NW6 at 29 (the bane of my life, after 5 hair transplant's I still dont like my hair but now I'm not bald its made a huge difference to me). Crap hair is 100x better than no hair.Otherwise nothing else to worry about, (would'nt mind an couple of extra inches) :hump: but who would'nt? :mrgreen:

 

[barcafan]

The best advice i could give you is to accept what you cant change and expend your energy on what you can change. I've taken this advice myself and im glad i did.

 

[Thickandthin]

The media does have an effect, yes, but when I walk around campus I see loads of NW1s and it makes me angry (I'd say I see 60% NW1, 25% NW2, and 10% NW3 and 5% slick....no horseshoes or anyone showing worse than a NW3). I dealt with two very devastating conditions in my teens (acne on my face and stretch marks on my back of all places) and as a result became very withdrawn, shy, depressed, etc. It almost destroyed me. However, I had laser correction on my back and a short, low dose course of Accutane for the acne (no, I don't believe it caused my hairloss) and suddenly my problems weren't so bad. That was for about 3 years, and I remember thinking during that time that if there any justice in the world, I would be spared the pain of going bald. WRONG.

My brother is also thinning but only has slight thinning in the crown and a stronger hairline, and he's 26. He never had acne or anything else and was born with a very outgoing, dominant personality and has always been more lively than me and quite a bit more successful with women. So I always feel like sh*t in comparison because I know that deep down, genetically I am inferior.

Sometimes I think I have some underlying condition that is causing all of this. I know there is a connection between acne and hairloss, and cortisol and hairloss (with excess cortisol also being a cause of stretch marks). And I see dudes with NW1s who are tall, fit, clear skinned, and outgoing and all I can think is "superior genetics". I really do think there is some connection between it all.....that if one gene is recessive (or even dominant like hairloss but undesirable) then in general there will be lots of other undesirable traits. Perhaps there is something that controls the selection/expression of undesirable traits, and when one is selected many others are as well. And TBH, it seems like most of the balding dudes I see on campus are short, somewhat paunchy, poor complexions and dress poorly. Maybe it's from the low self esteem, or maybe its genetic? Who knows. While granted I see NW1s of all shapes and sizes, which is to be expected because most dudes DON'T START BALDING IN COLLEGE.

Bah.

 

[uncomfortable man]

If it weren't for hairloss, I would be a god. :innocent:

 

[Hammer87]

Ok, let's compare while we are at it:

-5'7" (171 cm)
-not really talented at anything, just ok in most things
-slight speech impediment
-only 4 fingers on right hand
-broken nose when I was 17
-almost non-existant hair on top now at 25 (only a month 'til I'm 26 though)
-not very attractive looking
-oblong head shape which makes the bald look pretty bad for me
-this I forgot originally: seborrheic dermatitis on face and scalp

But yeah, if I could fix only one thing I'd fix the slight speech impediment. It's the one that holds me back the most since I'm naturally very talkative type. I do realize that there's only one me though and I have friends who seem to like me for what I am so who gives a f*ck.

4 Fingers, how'd that happen?

 

[ghg]

I was born with 5 fingers but the thumb was flawed (didn't develop) and had to be surgered off. That's how it happened.

 

[Norsk]

-

 

[ali777]

Does not having any money or not being able to make any money count as a genetic deficiency???

Apart from the lack of drive to make money my genes are good enough (looking at the mirror and :jackit: )...

Actually, if I had money, I probably would have been an arrogant bastard. This bad period in my life must be a lesson from "karma", I appreciate little things in life and I've become very humble.