Is this the worst time in history to be losing hair?

[qball01]

Lots of good material in here, so pardon me while I play catch up...

http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthrea ... ght=friend[/url]

 

[Nene]

:shock:

 

[Smooth]

this is not cruelty, its a body builders forum...the exaggerations are very much expected from this type of subhumans. + they all say the guy isnt good looking himself... typical small-dick syndrome post.
that post only shows how much superficial people become and thus only enhanced the argument that going bald sucks big time these days.

 

[KeepTheHair]

:shock:

:whistle: shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit



Yeah, cruel world if you don't have perfect looks. What I admire however is that they don't give a sh*t. I wish I could be that way.


But yeah, :shock: .

 

[Boondock]

:shock:

:whistle: shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit



Yeah, cruel world if you don't have perfect looks. What I admire however is that they don't give a sh*t. I wish I could be that way.


But yeah, :shock: .

I agree. That thread shows how big a handicap it really is. This girl might have got lucky and found a reasonably good man, but she must have had hell growing up. She no doubt still gets abuse and stares.

Being that ugly is a real disability, and far worse than most bad things that can happen to you.

 

[uncomfortable man]

that post only shows how much superficial people become and thus only enhanced the argument that going bald sucks big time these days.

Right, but according to Q people are too preoccupied with their own appearance to care let alone comment on other people's physical flaws...like the girl from that post, right? Wrong. I'm confused Q, you try so hard to convince me that what I see, what I hear, what I experience is not real- that I am imagining everything as a paranoid delusion and then offer up proof that people actually do make fun of someone for their appearance in malicious and cruel ways. I suppose that girl is somehow responsible for those other peoples shallow opinions of her and that any flack she gets for the way she looks is entirely in her head?

 

[Nene]

That girl was incredibly ugly but those remarks are pretty f*****g mean. Even people calling the dude ugly, he's a regular looking guy, maybe even above average.

 

[Boondock]

That girl was incredibly ugly but those remarks are pretty f****ing mean. Even people calling the dude ugly, he's a regular looking guy, maybe even above average.

Yeah, to be honest I just found it really depressing. Sure, she's ugly, but it's not like she's done anything wrong or it's her fault. It's like laughing in the face of a guy in a wheelchair or something.

I think they shot down the guy just to boost themselves. If he got some better clothes and sorted his hair out in some of the pics, he'd definitely be above average.

 

[qball01]

that post only shows how much superficial people become and thus only enhanced the argument that going bald sucks big time these days.

Right, but according to Q people are too preoccupied with their own appearance to care let alone comment on other people's physical flaws...like the girl from that post, right? Wrong. I'm confused Q, you try so hard to convince me that what I see, what I hear, what I experience is not real- that I am imagining everything as a paranoid delusion and then offer up proof that people actually do make fun of someone for their appearance in malicious and cruel ways. I suppose that girl is somehow responsible for those other peoples shallow opinions of her and that any flack she gets for the way she looks is entirely in her head?

no, I was providing you an example of what true "aesthetic ugliness" is. And how it is worse for girls than guys. Baldness is by no means an automatic ugliness, especially in your case where its clear that you're a handsome guy. But what YOU have done, is become hypersensitive to all this Hollywood BS and convinced yourself you're the male equivalent of that girl simply because you don't fit the Hollywood prototype of "the perfect male" (newsflash...very few men do). Don't get me wrong...there definitely are unfortunate cases where being ugly will draw the criticism of shallow, superficial people...and I don't doubt you've encountered some idiotic comments about baldness...most people (bald or not) will hear stuff about their appearance from time to time...dumb comments from dumb people. But to have convinced yourself that simply by being bald, you are getting pointed at and laughed at, and judged by "random man in shop, and cashier girl, and mother with babystroller, gas station attendant, etc." is laughable...because THOSE people are just your everyday, ordinary folk as well. And my point about that thread was...be thankful you're not actually what would be considered ugly, because then maybe you would experience some REAL and harsh, unjustified "persecution." Understand that there are cases however, where normal and attractive looking people convince themselves they are "ugly" and their reality becomes one that enforces that belief. THAT is your situation. Dude...I walk through a university campus on a daily basis (with kids who are much younger than you and are therefore likely to be more judgmental and superficial) and I don't notice these harsh, judgmental stares...even when I try to. Do I get some looks time to time? Of course...but human beings naturally look at others to assess potential risks/threats...and perhaps my bald head does draw some curiosity because its so rare...but most of the time I just notice people looking past me, the same way they do everybody else. To most people...I'm just another person because despite being bald, I'm just a normal looking guy. Thats the difference....you've convinced yourself that baldness is this giant deformity, and therefore your mind finds evidence to suggest that. I know I'm not some hideous monster, and therefore I don't think people see me as such.

But maybe I'm wrong...in that case however, one question remains. If people are everyday, constantly staring at you negatively and laughing at you being bald....does that mean its happening to me too? And every other f*****g bald guy on the planet? Because it MUST mean that, or else...why would it happen to you and not everybody else?

 

[Smooth]

Nobody here wants to look like an Hollywood star, we just want the hair back, - simple :dunno:

 

[Obsidian]

But you don't think they would be off on some other board crying about something else?

 

[Fender89]

in fairness never in my life have i been on a help website for any medical and self esteem issue until i joined this forum so...

 

[Obsidian]

So because you didn't, it means others probably don't? Most of us on here I believe have self-esteem and confidence issues that we are not willing to admit so we blame whatever is happening to us on something we can't control, when we should be focusing on something we can control.

 

[Smooth]

But you don't think they would be off on some other board crying about something else?

I dont see anything wrong with that IF the "problem" is real (unlike some BDD sufferers here), bothers them and there's nothing they can do about it .

 

[Obsidian]

But you don't think they would be off on some other board crying about something else?

I dont see anything wrong with that IF the "problem" is real (unlike some BDD sufferers here), bothers them and there's nothing they can do about it .

That just proves though that we will always find some sort of flaw in ourselves and that if you keep trying to measure yourself up to next the guy, you're always gonna fall short *no pun intended for me :whistle: *

 

[Nuli]

Yes i feel for us young guys, right now is a bad time to have hair loss. Just because it seems like we are on the verge of something that could cure it in the next 5-10 years. So i say to myself, well life in my 30s will be good at least, but on the other hand i feel like im wasting my life in the 20s, while maybe i should be working on accepting hair loss and just shaving.

 

[uncomfortable man]

Please Obi, I know you want to sound all profound and everything but DON'T underestimate the joy that recovering a full head of hair would bring to any of us who are suffering from hairloss, please. If you were to wake up tomorrow six feet tall, you would be ecstatic and we would all be happy for you instead of shitting on your joy. Just try and consider that.

 

[Obsidian]

But it's not gonna happen so why dwell on what will never be and instead try to move on with your life and focus on what you can do instead?

 

[qball01]

But it's not gonna happen so why dwell on what will never be and instead try to move on with your life and focus on what you can do instead?

because then he can't hold on to his victim mentality which is what his mind and body is used to by now....this is a concept that has really resonated with me recently. Accepting the possbility that hairloss isn't as big a deal as we think (and that people aren't mocking us constantly on the street because we have hairloss) means that WE are responsible ultimately for what happens to us. It means that no matter what happens in life, WE would have to accept control and that is a big burden to bear...instead, why not be able to blame something that we can't control and alleviate the burden of personal responsibility? The reality is...accepting that hairloss isn't our biggest burden means accepting the possibility for success...which means embracing the unknown. Most of us value comfort and familiarity...so the concept of the unknown is disturbing to us. For someone like U-man, he may not like the negative reality he lives in, but hes familiar with it...his mind and body are used to it by now. Accepting personal responsibility for what happens to us means that our lives are going to potentially change forever...for a lot of people, especially people who have battled depression, BDD, anxiety, etc....they don't want to have to deal with the possibility of immense change. So hanging onto an excuse such as "I'm bald and therefore can't live the life I would want to live if I had hair no matter what, so I shouldn't even try" becomes a very easy coping mechanism because the alternative of "I can still live a great life and do the things I want to...but it will take a tonne of mental perseverance, painstaking self-introspection, and a lot of trial and error" is a hell of a lot harder.

Also Uman...don't dodge my previous question. I want to know....since you think the world is out to mock you because of your baldness everywhere you go.....does that mean that I too am facing constant heckling and persecution everywhere I go? And obviously that would mean that every single bald man faces the same as well correct? And if I deny that I get laughed and smirked at in public constantly...does that mean I'm just crazy and delusional?

 

[barcafan]

i wouldn't say its the worst time, but the media definitely plays a negative role. not just hair but pretty much everything. Moreso in the states i reckon.