My Story

[Myth]

All of this is hard for me to talk about, let alone deal with. I don't know so much about hair loss, because I always assumed it wouldn't happen to me. But here it goes.

I am 24. I've always had high temples, so I suppose I wasn't always noticing my hair line, and just assumed that's how I looked. I've always had long hair. But the thing is about all of this, is that I am a tricophiliac. I've known since I was really little, so hair has always been really important to me. Especially as a definition for my masculinity, I always viewed those rockers from the 60's and 70's as the epitome of "male," because of their hair.

I didn't noticed that my hair was getting worse and worse until 2015, when I accidentally saw the top of my head in the mirror. I could see my scalp there, which was unusual. I have always had really thick and coarse long black hair, and when I went to the barber I always had to get it thinned, I had so much. My god, how I miss those days now.

So this hair loss really eats at the core of my being, because of the delicate issue it presents to my psyche. I CANNOT be a bald guy, and refuse to let it happen. The worst part of this all for me, is that my new fiance is from Norway. A beautiful Norwegian girl, who loves the guys with long hair. I can't tell you the amount of self hatred arises when I think I cannot be that guy for her in the future, and that she might eventually hate me for what a disgusting mess I look like. Or worse, find some guy with better hair.

In October of 2015, I went to a dermatologist and my worse fears were confirmed, that I was beginning to experience male pattern baldness. That confirmation, hearing it, experiencing it, made me shudder and I almost passed out. I've never heard anything so horrible in my life. But, I was prescribed finasteride, with a biotin supplement to support. I'm hoping for the best. If it all fails, then I'm taking the next exit to wig city.

I'd like to know how to upload pictures, since I'm month 3 now. Again I have long hair, so I'll move it around for you all to see my problem areas.

 

[shookwun]

never mind a little temple loss

Getting married at 24, theirs your first soon enough mistake.

 

[Myth]

Thanks

 

[Joan]

I think 24 is young to get married these days too, hair loss or not. And I know some people think Fred is Mr. Negativity, but I do agree that, being so young, she might not feel the same about you if you can no longer sport that long-hair rocker look to which she is deeply attracted. Take a long, hard look at your relationship before you leap. There's a female member here named EvilLocks who is very pretty but got dumped by her boyfriend when she started losing her hair.

 

[SayifDoit]

Don't forget minoxidil.
You don't know how severe it is anyway.

Would help, if you provided a pic.

 

[jksl]

New fiance? So, you had another fiance before?

 

[xetudor]

A beautiful Norwegian girl, who loves the guys with long hair. I can't tell you the amount of self hatred arises when I think I cannot be that guy for her in the future, and that she might eventually hate me for what a disgusting mess I look like. Or worse, find some guy with better hair..

Don't sweat it, it's not like she'll be beautiful forever. Her looks will most likely take a major hit in next 10 years anyway, she's not getting any younger. And if she cheats you, then **** it, she was a **** all along.

And if you can, just avoid marriage, it's at best useless these days and at worst, it can seriously **** you up.

 

[Wolf Pack]

I think 24 is young to get married these days too, hair loss or not. And I know some people think Fred is Mr. Negativity, but I do agree that, being so young, she might not feel the same about you if you can no longer sport that long-hair rocker look to which she is deeply attracted. Take a long, hard look at your relationship before you leap. There's a female member here named EvilLocks who is very pretty but got dumped by her boyfriend when she started losing her hair.

Who could ever think that?

I do agree with Fred and your points here. 24 is young unless you are convinced that it's the right decision. Fred mentioning genetics is a really good point. It's out of our hands whether we bald or not to a large extent.

 

[Norwood]

Marriage is good, but no self-respecting man should ever marry a non-virgin girl. Women never stop loving their first lover.

 

[Joan]

Marriage is good, but no self-respecting man should ever marry a non-virgin girl. Women never stop loving their first lover.

Who said we all loved our "first"? Good luck finding a non-virgin. I'm not knocking your opinion, but I do disagree.

 

[Joan]

Yes, I did mean virgin (thank you).

When Norwood lumped non-virgin and lover in the same sentence, I thought he meant lover as in the first guy you slept with. If you change the wording to "first love", then I'd say that's true, probably more times than not. Here is something to consider, though: As life goes on and we do find true love, we sometimes look back and realize we never loved the ones we thought we did. I thought I loved two other guys, but now I know I've only really ever loved my husband. I hope this makes sense.

(I said some people think you're negative, Fred. I didn't say I agree.)

 

[christina berg]

Hey myth would like to see your photos! i always click on the 3 symbol to the right in the comment bubble (it look like a frame with a tree inside)
Im a dude with long hair my self, and totally understad you...balding is not an option..so i got on finasteride 1,25mg and Ketokonazol shampoo..been on it for 4 months with very good results so far.
have a look: http://www.hairlosstalk.com/interact/showthread.php/96035-MY-SUCCESS-D-sins-((Sep-17-2015))

 

[Joan]

I know, some people think describing the reality as it is means that you're negative. Well, don't we all wish our lives and the world were fair?

You know what my friends or my family would reply to OP? "That's great! How exciting that you're getting married, don't listen to negativity, I mean 80% of marriages fail?! That won't happen to you as you seem like a good guy! And no, she won't leave you because you're balding, you're paranoid, and you're more than your hair!"

99% of people would spout that BS and maybe even believe their own words. Sometimes I wonder if people say those things and then take pleasure in seeing other people fail.

I know what you mean about love, it's still en empty word for me, mostly used by women, and in the end, no one has the same definition.

My definition would be: yes, I really to spend time with that girl, we make each other feel good, we always feel better after we've seen each other.

Funny how that definition wouldn't apply to 90% of my ex-girlfriends. The one I thought I fell in love with (became obsessed is the right word I think), I would hate to spend time with her now.

You don't become friends with every person you meet, and in the end, one has very few best friends that remain over the years.

I think it's the same when it comes to relationships. I'd say I've met (as in went on a date with) 3 or 4 girls maximum that I consider 'special' in my life, out of more than 50.

You describe the negativity that exists in this world. That doesn't mean you, yourself, are negative.

You're correct that many marriages fail. I will encourage my sons to stash away money if they ever get married because they'll be screwed if they have kids and then get a divorce. This may sound negative, but I have seen men forced to move back in with their parents because of child support payments. Feminists sing a different tune when they get divorced and they have children. How come there's no equality there?

Fred, you sound like an old soul in your last paragraphs regarding love. If there was anything positive about losing your hair in your teens, I would say it's given you insight about different things that most guys your age simply cannot grasp. I think if you were still a fullhead, you wouldn't be analyzing people and this life quite so much, if at all. I do hope your hair outlives you.

 

[christina berg]

And about the marriage crap!! you need to listen to Tom Leykis radio show!

 

[M.G]

Those statistics are interesting.

I'm too lazy to search for the statistics, but I assume people who doesn't got/growned up with todays modern western values - they generally stick together for a longer period of time.

Is that actually down to a bigger percentage of them actually being virgins or how much of that is connected to what culture you belong to?

 

[I.D WALKER]

I will encourage my sons to stash away money if they ever get married because they'll be screwed if they have kids and then get a divorce. This may sound negative, but I have seen men forced to move back in with their parents because of child support payments. Feminists sing a different tune when they get divorced and they have children. How come there's no equality there?

Great maternal advice Joan. Actually squirrelling away a security net ought to everyone's priority. I think at least a quarter of your annual average is necessary, but that's probably even too little.

Joan, your pragmatism, common/practical sense, vision and devotion to your sons (kids?) is why I'm particularly impressed by your participation here.

 

[EvilLocks]

Shoutout to my fellow norwegian girl that is your fiance!

 

[Cue Bald]

lol if i had to find a virgin girl at 28....

 

[Myth]

Here is my hair. Unwashed since yesterday morning, no product. I'm fairly adept at masking it now.

 

[nameless]

Myth one thing to consider is that if you don't get married now to the gal you have do you think you could get married to another gal later?

My point is that at least you two already have some love between each other and if you move on then you will sooner or later have to

start completely over with someone else from scratch. Can you fall in love with someone else if you're bumming heavily over

your hair loss? If you want to know what I think I think you should try to make it work.


- - - Updated - - -

Yes, I did mean virgin (thank you).

When Norwood lumped non-virgin and lover in the same sentence, I thought he meant lover as in the first guy you slept with. If you change the wording to "first love", then I'd say that's true, probably more times than not. Here is something to consider, though: As life goes on and we do find true love, we sometimes look back and realize we never loved the ones we thought we did. I thought I loved two other guys, but now I know I've only really ever loved my husband. I hope this makes sense.

(I said some people think you're negative, Fred. I didn't say I agree.)

Makes perfect sense.

- - - Updated - - -

Hey myth would like to see your photos! i always click on the 3 symbol to the right in the comment bubble (it look like a frame with a tree inside)
Im a dude with long hair my self, and totally understad you...balding is not an option..so i got on finasteride 1,25mg and Ketokonazol shampoo..been on it for 4 months with very good results so far.
have a look: http://www.hairlosstalk.com/interact/showthread.php/96035-MY-SUCCESS-D-sins-((Sep-17-2015))

Finally some people who might understand my feelings about big long hair. I have to have it.