Dating Advice For An Ugly Friend Of Mine

[Afro_Vacancy]

100% agree that external factors lead to depression in the majority of cases.

Two main times I've been depressed
- when I broke up with my girlfriend and I had nothing to do with my time all of sudden so I began to feel very lonely
- when I was unemployed for 4 months and had to live with my mum

If I had to spend four months with my mom ...

*Shudders*

 

[Exodus2011]

Yeah, its just swiping a finger - its not like he's doing it in real life where girls can laugh at him.

Anyway, I'm going to relay the advice you guys have given me whenever this issue comes up again and hopefully we can help him.

a real life person choosing to reject a chance to contact him . . . . its not just a swipe

that kind of literalness demeans everything. football is shoving each other over plastic, and literally crying and fighting over it, wars are imaginary lines in sand , etc

im saying this cuz i know the feeling. i dont even want to try online. its obviously still real people. not as bad as real life of course but you cant deny its impact

 

[Baldingat188]

I agree on the external factors causing depression. I'm losing my hair at 18 of course it's gonna feel like sh*t. In fact it's ruining my life and it's become an obbesion where I can't go 5 minutes without looking at my hair which in turn makes me depressed.

There is no "accepting" hairloss IMO. Maybe it's cause I've spent to much time on this website but that phrase pisses me off. Who the Hell can accept looking significantly worse at the beginning of your youth?

 

[shookwun]

I've seen your credentials, you're probably on the same level as me: above average, which is the minimum required to get by on Tinder. And by getting by, I mean that it becomes a productive endeavor where you have a reasonable amount of success.

I wouldn't even advise an average guy to try his luck on Tinder. Based on my own experience and what I've seen around me, it would just be a waste of time.

Tellersquil also had a reasonable amount of success on Tinder and he was around 6/10 looks-wise and tall if I remember well.

@shookwun has it even easier than the above average guy with his jacked body.

If you want to know how it is to be an average guy on dating apps, see how @David_MPN is doing.

But that guy you posted in this thread? Waste of time in his state.

If you're above average in looks, online dating is definitely a valuable resource and it would be kind of stupid to dismiss it.

I found my happiness on Tinder twice and trying to date in real life was not even required for me.

It's the cold truth

No hate on David's part, he's come along way. Experience is experience

All though 9 dates and 1 make out is well....not a good sign.

Similar to yourself I made out with almoay every single chick I met up with at minimum.



This Johnson guy cracks me up. Either is blind on his attractiveness or lives in a city where women out number men.


I work with a lot of guys who are none these apps year round with almost no success. They tell me first hand yet guess who's slaying that I know like no tomorrow - tall, handsome full head.

No surprise

 

[JohnsonDDG]

It's the cold truth

No hate on David's part, he's come along way. Experience is experience

All though 9 dates and 1 make out is well....not a good sign.

Similar to yourself I made out with almoay every single chick I met up with at minimum.



This Johnson guy cracks me up. Either is blind on his attractiveness or lives in a city where women out number men.


I work with a lot of guys who are none these apps year round with almost no success. They tell me first hand yet guess who's slaying that I know like no tomorrow - tall, handsome full head.

No surprise

Like I said - I just didn't know what to say and I thought that going online might be easier than trying to meet people in real life - so at the time I thought I was giving good advice.

I'm going to try and give him more pragmatic advice next time but its hard because he's trying to quit booze and I don't want to tell him to loose weight and fix his teeth.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Like I said - I just didn't know what to say and I thought that going online might be easier than trying to meet people in real life - so at the time I thought I was giving good advice.

I'm going to try and give him more pragmatic advice next time but its hard because he's trying to quit booze and I don't want to tell him to loose weight and fix his teeth.

Very few people can handle bad news.

There might be no good way to tell him the facts.

Maybe start by letting him know it might be a long recovery, 12-24 months for example.

 

[Dench57]

girls dig nerds!!!

 

[CopeForLife]

It's the cold truth

No hate on David's part, he's come along way. Experience is experience

All though 9 dates and 1 make out is well....not a good sign.

Similar to yourself I made out with almoay every single chick I met up with at minimum.



This Johnson guy cracks me up. Either is blind on his attractiveness or lives in a city where women out number men.


I work with a lot of guys who are none these apps year round with almost no success. They tell me first hand yet guess who's slaying that I know like no tomorrow - tall, handsome full head.

No surprise

Emm, make out = slayed? David slayed that chick from the date???

It's sad when you hear an average black guy tell you:

"Before you, I had never met a guy that could get a girl from Tinder! I didn't think it was possible!"

He really thought my ex-girlfriend was the only girl I could get and that I was very lucky.

I didn't have the heart to tell him my numbers.

He's also the kind of guy who will go to the club while it's obvious that he has no chance.

The guy saw me make out with chicks on the dancefloor a couple of times, the guy was raving about it weeks, months after it happened, thought I had mad skillz: "This guy, he the man!"

He also almost had a seizure when he saw that I didn't try to pursue the girls I had made out with.

wait how about BBC and western girl thrusting for it??

 

[CopeForLife]

girls dig nerds!!!

nerd with stubble > bald beast

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

That guy's picture there just jolted me.

He has a terrific look if and only if the criteria is to play a child molester character on Law & Order SVU.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Your actual point however is overwhelmingly convincing.

On good-looking people, glasses are an option, and can even look cute and fun.

On the rest of us, there is little tolerance for personality and expression, and little room for error.

 

[CopeForLife]

holy sh*t, glasses is everything

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

This just in super attractive people wearing glasses are still regarded attractive more news at 11.

 

[CopeForLife]

It was just a joke. Glasses vs. not glasses for good-looking guys makes you automatically think about Clark Kent vs. Superman.

As you know, I've spent 2900€ to get rid of glasses forever.

My friends couldn't stop laughing when I had my glasses on for some reason.

Let's not even mention the shaved head + glasses: "OMG Moby!"

Glasses are accepted these days but it was not always the case.

Many people who had glasses before the 2000's told me that they were heavily mocked for it.

In the end, it remains a flaw, an evidence of your genetic weakness, and yes it makes you slightly less attractive.

Of course good-looking guys can get away with it. They also get away with oversized clothes, bad hair cuts, bad grooming, nothing surprising.

No A-list actor is ever wearing glasses on screen (unless the role absolutely requires it like Spider-man or Harry Potter) or even in real life.

It can happen but it's rare. There's a reason for that.

I stand by my point about this: people who still wear glasses in 2017 are not even trying.

I was the only guy in a class (I changed 4 school tho because of relocations, so it was ~110 people) who wore glasses. I was (still) stuttering a lot.

And premature baldness on top.

x100

 

[CopeForLife]

The issue is more the combination of glasses + baldness than glasses in itself. Also, some people just don't pick cool glasses !

I got LASIK. 500$.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I used to watch Parker Lewis Can't Lose when I was a kid.

When my nearsightedness kicked in, the first thought that came to my mind was:

"f***, I'm going to become that nerd from Parker Lewis!"

So easy to fix though, unlike baldness .

I was rejected by a lasik clinic a while back.

I'll try again soon. I resolved to do this a few days ago as a friend had a very positive experience with a top lasik surgeon nearby.

 

[Dench57]

I got LASIK. 500$.

$0.50 pints and $500 Lasik

i need to pay your country a visit

 

[CopeForLife]

Everyone I know who has had PRK/Lasik done is very happy with their results.

You should definitely go for it.



Not for women I think, glasses is one of my top keywords, if you know what I mean.

The only side I (and all of my friends) got is areola around lighters at night.

 

[Dench57]

A lot of these self improvements need to be taken with a pinch of salt for those who are in the average range - that was the point I was trying to make originally. The returns may be a marginal improvement if that except the psychological impact.

They're very easy changes to make though. Low hanging fruit. I'm sure he would be aware he's not turning into a slayer overnight. But he can turn from ugly into just about average which is enough to transcend inceldom and settle down with a homely 5/10. Quality of life goes up tenfold and all he basically needs to do is

Haircut
Better glasses
Lose some weight

hardest is fixing teeth and even that's not particularly hard