Dating is not meant to be easy, even for guys that get matches..

[doubleindemnity]

How about people in this thread stop blaming the others and blame themselves? You can't control others' actions but you can always be better yourself, and learn from this screw up, to the extent that it is a screw up. Labeling the person who blocked you as unstable or excessively egotistical is the old sour grapes thing because if this had not happened, you would have happily gone on the date. Focus on what you did wrong and don't label the other person as rude or selfish or anything until you have done everything perfectly yourself. What happened to the man of today who is relentlessly seeking to better himself and not looking for a single excuse?

 

[Norwoody]

I think most things are a both-sided issue to varying degrees. But at the end of the day, yeah, just focus on controlling what you can and not worrying so much or complaining about what you can’t.

 

[disfiguredyoungman]

Marcus Aurelius knew this.

 

[spring15]

Majority of guys on here are in shape, intelligent, successful and bald...but they can't get a date to save their life. Are you sure about that?

I doubt that. I think some is the other way round. Majority of guys here out of shape, intelligent - sure , minimum wage/low wage jobs & yes bald

I could be wrong though

 

[Wolf Pack]

I doubt that. I think some is the other way round. Majority of guys here out of shape, intelligent - sure , minimum wage/low wage jobs & yes bald

I could be wrong though

Pretty sure he has autism too or some other mental hiccup, the way he has written that same sentence repeatedly and a few others are a dead giveaway of rigid inflexible thinking.

 

[Feelsbadman]

workout daily, low body fat with muscle
eat healthy
don't have much money but at the start of my career and will improve ,
no health issues
good family
no drugs/tattoos/alcaholic

Haven't had a girlfriend for years
all my matches on dating apps are with obese women or single mums 30+
0 attention from women

balding is a death sentence

 

[Oknow]

workout daily, low body fat with muscle
eat healthy
don't have much money but at the start of my career and will improve ,
no health issues
good family
no drugs/tattoos/alcaholic

Haven't had a girlfriend for years
all my matches on dating apps are with obese women or single mums 30+
0 attention from women

balding is a death sentence

I’ve been talking to a single mum for a few months and she is much better personality wise than many of the women without kids I’ve met

 

[Feelsbadman]

I’ve been talking to a single mum for a few months and she is much better personality wise than many of the women without kids I’ve met

are you a Rookie?
This is because she is experienced and is like a human sniper trying to line up a beta chump to look after and her kid

 

[Oknow]

are you a Rookie?
This is because she is experienced and is like a human sniper trying to line up a beta chump to look after and her kid

maybe

but we just click

 

[doubleindemnity]

Pretty sure he has autism too or some other mental hiccup, the way he has written that same sentence repeatedly and a few others are a dead giveaway of rigid inflexible thinking.

Nope. I've been tested. A few traits of ASD but I don't have it. That line has been repeated but it's because it is true! I don't have ASD and I have no excuses except for hair loss for being a loser.

 

[Oknow]

Nope. I've been tested. A few traits of ASD but I don't have it. That line has been repeated but it's because it is true! I don't have ASD and I have no excuses except for hair loss for being a loser.

Seen so many bald guys with partners out and about

My own brother after going bald and following a divorce has a new partner

in contrast, I have a lot more hair and single

I’m sure it’s harder, but it’s not impossible, where your half glass empty attitude is not helping you

 

[Oknow]

How about people in this thread stop blaming the others and blame themselves? You can't control others' actions but you can always be better yourself, and learn from this screw up, to the extent that it is a screw up. Labeling the person who blocked you as unstable or excessively egotistical is the old sour grapes thing because if this had not happened, you would have happily gone on the date. Focus on what you did wrong and don't label the other person as rude or selfish or anything until you have done everything perfectly yourself. What happened to the man of today who is relentlessly seeking to better himself and not looking for a single excuse?

but we didn’t go on the date because of the above reasons. She was self-centered and projected her insecurities onto me.

 

[Wolf Pack]

Nope. I've been tested. A few traits of ASD but I don't have it. That line has been repeated but it's because it is true! I don't have ASD and I have no excuses except for hair loss for being a loser.

There you said it, few traits of ASD but diagnosis itself is not like checking for an MI or asthma - it's open to interpretation despite guidelines. You really should see someone again and get the appropriate help as you'll make this issue bigger than it is. It's not the fact that the line has been repeated but the inflexible way you write it time after time, it's a hard point to get across but it's easy to pick it up as a problem over a natural flowing conversation. Losing your hair doesn't make you a loser, it's an illness like any. I don't doubt the fact you are in shape (you showed it), you seem smart and I believe you work in finance? This is all good but you need to find the path to inner peace...I totally can imagine how loneliness must without a lover, I wish you luck, but in your case positivity would go a long way just generally in life. You're going to have to move on one way or another over torture as you once said, whether that is having a family or focussing on other healing hobbies and time with friends, relatives.

I really don't think you should be on the forum even if it's exactly for people like you real baldness - even you were thinking of leaving. Now that would be sad in some ways for people who know you but I think you'd feel better honestly and moving on. If there is a cure you'll hear about it anyway.

 

[doubleindemnity]

but we didn’t go on the date because of the above reasons. She was self-centered and projected her insecurities onto me.

This 'self-centered and projected her insecurities onto me' is cope in my opinion. You could have done better but didn't. Another way to look at it is that she sent that message because she's not fully comfortable meeting a guy from online dating and wanted to feel more comfortable. It's possible right? Assume the best of others and the worst of yourself.

There you said it, few traits of ASD but diagnosis itself is not like checking for an MI or asthma - it's open to interpretation despite guidelines. You really should see someone again and get the appropriate help as you'll make this issue bigger than it is. It's not the fact that the line has been repeated but the inflexible way you write it time after time, it's a hard point to get across but it's easy to pick it up as a problem over a natural flowing conversation. Losing your hair doesn't make you a loser, it's an illness like any. I don't doubt the fact you are in shape (you showed it), you seem smart and I believe you work in finance? This is all good but you need to find the path to inner peace...I totally can imagine how loneliness must without a lover, I wish you luck, but in your case positivity would go a long way just generally in life. You're going to have to move on one way or another over torture as you once said, whether that is having a family or focussing on other healing hobbies and time with friends, relatives.

I really don't think you should be on the forum even if it's exactly for people like you real baldness - even you were thinking of leaving. Now that would be sad in some ways for people who know you but I think you'd feel better honestly and moving on. If there is a cure you'll hear about it anyway.

Can you really imagine how loneliness without a lover can be? To me, positivity is not possible in this situation and if it were, would be totally inappropriate and wrong. Almost like being positive and joking at a funeral. I left the forum for around 2 weeks and nothing changed in my life, sadly. I came back and posted infrequently for 2 weeks and still the same. Now I am back full time I guess. I am a loser and my time is not very valuable, so it is not a big deal for me to waste it here. I probably will get assessed for ASD again but it's unlikely that I have it.

 

[Oknow]

This 'self-centered and projected her insecurities onto me' is cope in my opinion. You could have done better but didn't. Another way to look at it is that she sent that message because she's not fully comfortable meeting a guy from online dating and wanted to feel more comfortable. It's possible right? Assume the best of others and the worst of yourself.



Can you really imagine how loneliness without a lover can be? To me, positivity is not possible in this situation and if it were, would be totally inappropriate and wrong. Almost like being positive and joking at a funeral. I left the forum for around 2 weeks and nothing changed in my life, sadly. I came back and posted infrequently for 2 weeks and still the same. Now I am back full time I guess. I am a loser and my time is not very valuable, so it is not a big deal for me to waste it here. I probably will get assessed for ASD again but it's unlikely that I have it.

yet there are bald men out there with healthy dating lives.

 

[justinbieberscombover]

There you said it, few traits of ASD but diagnosis itself is not like checking for an MI or asthma - it's open to interpretation despite guidelines. You really should see someone again and get the appropriate help as you'll make this issue bigger than it is. It's not the fact that the line has been repeated but the inflexible way you write it time after time, it's a hard point to get across but it's easy to pick it up as a problem over a natural flowing conversation. Losing your hair doesn't make you a loser, it's an illness like any. I don't doubt the fact you are in shape (you showed it), you seem smart and I believe you work in finance? This is all good but you need to find the path to inner peace...I totally can imagine how loneliness must without a lover, I wish you luck, but in your case positivity would go a long way just generally in life. You're going to have to move on one way or another over torture as you once said, whether that is having a family or focussing on other healing hobbies and time with friends, relatives.

I really don't think you should be on the forum even if it's exactly for people like you real baldness - even you were thinking of leaving. Now that would be sad in some ways for people who know you but I think you'd feel better honestly and moving on. If there is a cure you'll hear about it anyway.

Not having a partner for a long time sucks. Makes you feel dead inside. It's not all about sex but doing things like going to concerts, traveling, feels empty without a lover to share those special moments with.

 

[doubleindemnity]

yet there are bald men out there with healthy dating lives.

Very exceptional cases. I haven't seen it and I have only heard about it online. I think that far more have, unlike myself and @Feelsbadman completely given up and don't give it another thought. "Go on dates? That's not something that I do." That idea gets internalized.

 

[justinbieberscombover]

yet there are bald men out there with healthy dating lives.

Once you drop out of life's natural flow socially it's incredibly difficult to bounce back sadly

I did it through hard work, patience, determination.. life goes on so I had no choice but to keep trying.

It's tough but totally possible

 

[Oknow]

Very exceptional cases. I haven't seen it and I have only heard about it online. I think that far more have, unlike myself and @Feelsbadman completely given up and don't give it another thought. "Go on dates? That's not something that I do." That idea gets internalized.

not trying is not going to get you anywhere

if my brother who is bald Indian can get a new partner, then I see no reason why you can’t either

 

[Oknow]

Not having a partner for a long time sucks. Makes you feel dead inside. It's not all about sex but doing things like going to concerts, traveling, feels empty without a lover to share those special moments with.

kinda get used to it afterawhile

totally forgotten what it is like to be in a relationship