Explain How This sh*t Happened. Subhuman Bald Ethnik Married Model.

[EvilLocks]

I think you need perspective.

You have not suffered more than everybody.

You have to remember that suffering is relative. Personally I would rather lose my hair than end up in a wheel chair or losing my eyesight for instance, but nobody can tell me I have suffered less than these people. In fact I have witnessed people in wheel chairs who seem to live a much happier and more fulfilling life than me. And then there are people like that who are even more depressed than me.
How you deal with a particular problem all comes down to how your brain is wired, I think.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I hope it's not rude to ask, but what made an 8 year old want to take his own life? (you don't have to say it if it's too personal!)
My childhood (0-17) were the happiest times of my life, no real problems, all good memories. I'd say I had a very privileged childhood, with a loving family where nobody had diet yet, many friends and even teenage love. Thinking about these memories brings me both hurt and happiness, but all in all I'm very grateful for the good times.

My childhood varied from being very happy to being very miserable.

The main problems were:

1) A psychotic, dumb, angry, and lazy mother. She screamed for hours on end every day, I was always late for school, doctor's and dentists' appointments were often not handled well, both my sister and I were malnourished at times. She had a few moments of competency, but the average was low. She felt that she needed to scream in order to relieve herself. The screaming never stopped, apparently in our old apartment building the tenants would organize petitions to have us evicted. She was also awful to my father, always criticizing him, and treating him as a wallet and chauffeur and nothing more.

Given the existence of my sister and I, he's had sex with her a minimum of two times, and I have no idea how he did it.

She's still my mom though, I still love her and so she still haunts me. When I call her I feel like the 15-minute calls are endless. She's a pack rat now, and is making sure that having her taken care of in her old age will be as difficult as possible. She's staying in an apartment unsuitable for old people, and not throwing anything out. It's full of broken furniture and rotten food. I might go a month without calling her, then I feel guilty and call her, then the call is miserable and I'm miserable for a few hours.

2) Poverty sucks.

3) The kids at school were pretty awful, as were the teachers. I was in a religious jewish school, but I wasn't religious, so the kids mocked me for not respecting the religion properly, sometimes my friends would abandon me and when they did they would be the worst bullies. It is uniquely awful, to be bullied at school all day long, where even the teachers gang up on you, and then to come home to a mother who screams for an hour or two.

 

[Baldhurts]

Fred, what's next? Are you going to say you had it worse than Adam Pearson because he still has his hair?

 

[sunchyme1]

Fred, what's next? Are you going to say you had it worse than Adam Pearson because he still has his hair?


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i saw him in london victoria station last year. walked right past me. tiny guy too. maybe 5 3 or something.

have to be strong as f*** mentally to deal with that.

 

[SmoothSailing]

It takes a lack of 'perspective' to pretend or believe that balding is invariably worse than a serious illness like cancer, or to a physical mutation like losing an arm, or even to be born under very unfortunate circumstance (even though you haven't "lost anything").

Yes @WhitePolarBear you probably have gone through worse things than 95% of young people you meet, maybe even more. But there are many comparable and much worse experiences people often go through.

I can understand being angry at people for trying to trivialize your problems by comparing it to people with cancer.

I can't understand how you could possibly know that the horrible experience you went through, that almost no one else understands, is definitely worse than all these other experiences that you have never gone though, and thus don't fully understand.

 

[Baldhurts]

i saw him in london victoria station last year. walked right past me. tiny guy too. maybe 5 3 or something.

have to be strong as f*** mentally to deal with that.

Iv watched a couple documentaries on him. I admire him.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

You have to remember that suffering is relative. Personally I would rather lose my hair than end up in a wheel chair or losing my eyesight for instance, but nobody can tell me I have suffered less than these people. In fact I have witnessed people in wheel chairs who seem to live a much happier and more fulfilling life than me. And then there are people like that who are even more depressed than me.
How you deal with a particular problem all comes down to how your brain is wired, I think.

You talk a lot about your hair here, given that it's a hair loss site. But given what I know about you I would not say that hair loss is the cause of your problems. You were suffering from depression two years prior to hair loss, you have severe sleep issues, and you've mentioned an abusive relative.

If it were just the hair, you might be doing a lot better if not necessarily ok. It does look likely that it's dealing with hair loss in addition to all of your other problems that gave you a lot of grief.

Which is fair, as few of us are fortunate enough to have only one problem in isolation and everything else is wonderful.

Most of us can deal with a few problems, but if we already have five problems, the pain of the sixth problem can be unbearable.

 

[sunchyme1]

Iv watched a couple documentaries on him. I admire him.

not sure if i admire him. i mean i should do. but i just feel pity for him. its no life really is it

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

get a grip man. f*** me

your not ugly are you mate?

your one of these guys who is basically kind of average but has the potential to look MUCH BETTER but has no clue how to do it.

weve all given you recommendations that would get you to solid 7 easily.

The recommendations were to spend $30,000 I don't really have on various plastic surgeries, and to go to 8% bodyfat, even though a doctor has told me not to exercise.

Yeah sure that will help, it won't take me to a "7" though, at least not what people here mean when they say "7". According to this forum, Felicity Jones is a 7, no trust me, I would not be looksmatched with Felicity Jones. So I would not be a 7, I'd only be a "7" because you guys are softer when rating men than when rating women.

This creates a distortion and undermines all of the advice given on this forum.

 

[CopeForLife]

every facial deformity sucks

also there is a difference when you had a normal face and disfigured after an accident and when you born with it

 

[SmoothSailing]

My point is, I'm seeing those people who had cancer, and they're doing fine, and they look normal (they have a full head of hair), that's all I need to assess that male pattern baldness is worse.

They're happier than I was when I was bald. Sad fact.

So what about people using the same logic for balding guys?

"I know a balding guy who's doing fine".

We both know there are two reasons this is not indicative of our own experiences.

1. Maybe he seems like he's doing fine but in reality he's going through something rough.

2. Maybe he's an outlier, an unusual case.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I don't see other people end up in a psychiatric clinic, which means they're doing quite fine.

Yes, other people go to psychiatric clinics, that's why they're there, they're there because a lot of people are using them, there's a huge wait list to get into these clinics.

 

[hairblues]

everyones pain is relative to themselves and their own life experience

yes having empathy for others is fantastic

you can both feel sorry for yourself about something AND have empathy for cancer patients

I'm not sure why its being compared?

One is physically traumatizing and terrifying

One is mentally traumatizing and terrifying.

One can lead to death in some instances..but so can hair loss if suicide becomes an option.

I dont get comparing different types of pains

there is enough pain and suffering for everyone.

 

[Exodus2011]

too scared to get a job or to go to school cuz of baldness f*** me. dat guilt and anxiety

i was already paranoid but baldness pushed me into being dysfunctional

its crazy david we had similar childhoods other than you going to religious school and my parents splitting up, yet you are so responsible and im considering getting disability. to top it off im scared of even getting on disability lol. but i need some sort of security

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

too scared to get a job or to go to school cuz of baldness f*** me. dat guilt and anxiety

i was already paranoid but baldness pushed me into being dysfunctional

its crazy david we had similar childhoods other than you going to religious school and my parents splitting up, yet you are so responsible and im considering getting disability. to top it off im scared of even getting on disability lol. but i need some sort of security

Why would you not go on disability?
It need not be permanent, but if it helps you for 6, 12, 18 months, then it's for the best.

 

[Exodus2011]

I don't see other people end up in a psychiatric clinic, which means they're doing quite fine.

Are your unlucky friends in a psychiatric clinic? Have they ever been? No? Then I have suffered more than them.

You have to remember that I've suffered from baldness at the age of 22, gynecomastia, acne, eye floaters, panic attacks, depression and psychosis all at the same time. "You have not suffered more than everybody." Yeah no, I think I have. Good luck finding a person who's been through worse than that.

I think only @EvilLocks is on par with me when it comes to suffering at a young age, I can't decide if it was worse for her because she's a woman.

I'm only referring to that period of my life by the way, I know I'm 'privileged' now, but it's not like I've not worked hard to be where I am today.

agoraphobia and fully bald +preexisting issues for me x.x

and tbh i think its ridiculous to say baldness is worse than deformities and cancer BUT fact is its definitely in the bottom 25% of how bad of an issue it is.

safe to say its worse than at least 3/4 or 75% of problems out there

 

[hairblues]

Also physically!



Exactly.
I think, when your life is at stake, you actually don't have time to be depressed, you are more like fighting if you can.

One way or another, those comparisons are dumb.

Its not physically painful as cancer is what i mean.

we dont throw up all night or have to take morphine for pain.

its physically disfiguring but then so can cancer be.

 

[Exodus2011]

Why would you not go on disability?
It need not be permanent, but if it helps you for 6, 12, 18 months, then it's for the best.

shame. i dont wanna be seen as a parasite, which i already sorta feel like

 

[Baldhurts]

That is why I believe @David_MPN is fantastic!

I'm envious of David. Dude has a f*****g doctorate, is clearly smart as f***. Travels around for work.. seems like a classy guy.

Wish I would of taken my studies more seriously, instead I'm here in one of the worst Alberta economies scraping together my savings just to pay my 400k mortgage.

David is an inspiring guy.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

get a grip man. f*** me

your not ugly are you mate?

your one of these guys who is basically kind of average but has the potential to look MUCH BETTER but has no clue how to do it.

weve all given you recommendations that would get you to solid 7 easily.

He's not a 7.

He's around a 5 and has a nice guy face