Impact Is The Only Section I Read Frequently

[Baldingat188]

Im not sure why but this is the only section I frequently visit. Its defiantly the most depressing , but it can be entertaining as well - in a weird sort of way. this section defiantly can make you feel bad about hair loss , but at the same time some of the post here are so ridiculous that it is comical. maybe the hole its the "misery loves company" thing.

I feel like the "results" sections arent even worth the time to look at because they dont apply to everyone. I haven't yet started medication but I dont think I will respond well to it because my genetics carry severe male pattern baldness. the main section seems to be just people asking if they are balding.

do most of you read the other sections as well?

 

[CopeForLife]

Im not sure why but this is the only section I frequently visit. Its defiantly the most depressing , but it can be entertaining as well - in a weird sort of way. this section defiantly can make you feel bad about hair loss , but at the same time some of the post here are so ridiculous that it is comical. maybe the hole its the "misery loves company" thing.

I feel like the "results" sections arent even worth the time to look at because they dont apply to everyone. I haven't yet started medication but I dont think I will respond well to it because my genetics carry severe male pattern baldness. the main section seems to be just people asking if they are balding.

do most of you read the other sections as well?

hair transplant section

 

[blackg]

I love the characters on the impact forum.
All the other sections put me to sleep.

 

[blackg]

I love all the "unhinged" comments in this section.

I'm not immune to making these kind of comments either.

 

[dunno]

hair transplant section

 

[jd_uk]

I wouldn't make a habit of it - it's full of 'unbalanced' characters shall we say.

You only have to scan through a thread complaining about 'full heads' who have commited suicide to see that. Zero perspectice, zero social skills and clearly a lack of life experience.

 

[shookwun]

I wouldn't make a habit of it - it's full of 'unbalanced' characters shall we say.

You only have to scan through a thread complaining about 'full heads' who have commited suicide to see that. Zero perspectice, zero social skills and clearly a lack of life experience.

 

[KO21]

This is practically the only place i can express how much balding is f*****g me up physically mentally and emotionally, and not feel like I'll be judged, ridiculed or mocked.

 

[jd_uk]

Or maybe too much shitty life experience, which twisted our perspective and destroyed our social skills. Maybe.

Some people get bitter, others rise above it and work on other areas of their lives. There are people out there with far worse afflictions than hair loss who would shake their heads at the ridiculousness of some posts in here.

 

[shookwun]

Life experience was precisely what alerted me to how much baldness was going to f*** up my life.

he's to far gone.

I will give him credit though, he's like the arch knight of hope, and ambassador of blue pill-ism.

 

[jd_uk]

Life experience was precisely what alerted me to how much baldness was going to f*** up my life.

I've seen enough of the stuff on this forum over the years to know that this interpretation of life experience is very one dimensial and limited.

I mean...as if I haven't experienced discrimination or issues with hair loss - I've lost friends over it. Guys I used to be close with who treated me differently because of hair loss, I realised they weren't worth my time. Women who are genuinely turned off by normal male hair loss - they aren't the ones I respect or want to be with. The thing is, I have a very good social life, to the point where I sometimes feel bad for cancelling on people etc...I have friends of all ages, those who are bald/balding and those with perfect hair, I've travelled 30 countries in the last six years and I've dated some really beautiful women when I have shaved down so that there wasn't even a single hair on my head. Strangely for me, the most attractive women i ever dated were those when my balding was pretty obvious. Basically I've seen more than some of the people who post sh*t on here. To be the average person, I would never recommend they spend too much time on this forum if they were losing their hair as it only gives one very unbalanced and sometimes very sad point of view. If you're balding and hate it then fine, there's no harm having a sulk and a moan...i've been there myself and still would prefer to have hair...but for God sake don't go belittling people who were depressed pr commited suicide because they have hair and you don't. Just get yourself out of the damn house and go and do something in the world..learn something new, help someone...just quit the pathetic every day feeling sorry for yourself.

 

[jd_uk]

he's to far gone.

I will give him credit though, he's like the arch knight of hope, and ambassador of blue pill-ism.

Or perhaps just more mature than you. Actually shookwun, you're one of those people who will one minute make a good post and then the next week completely contradict what you said the week before. I presume a struggle with your own emotions. One minute women are everything to you, the next...meh no big deal. One minute you're acting 200% BDD, the next, not too bothered and telling people to chill out about it. My point is that it's hard to take some of what you say seriously.

I'd say I am very much a realist. I'm fully aware of how superficial the world can be. But I also don't close my eyes to the fact that the 'exceptions' to the red pill mantras constantly repeated on this forum are far too common to be considered exceptions. I can't stand moping and able bodied individuals feeling sorry for themselves day in, day out.

 

[jd_uk]

He's a UK guy in his thirties hanging around a blue collar, macho environment with fighters, manual laborers and other salt-of-the-earth characters. Sees one of his NW4 mates one night shagging a drunk redhead with crow's feet and a muffin top. Concludes millions of young NW5s exist, and are living confident lives with hot girlfriends. Jd_uk in a nutshell.

That's a very interesting interpretation given what I just wrote above.

 

[jd_uk]

I've been fortunate in many ways to have been exposed to a wide variety of people and environments. Financially and professionally I have done very well for myself and also lately with women. Unfortunately it hasn't changed my perception of hair loss and its effects on my life one iota. A precondition of my success has been awareness of my surroundings and it is precisely this awareness that makes me so deathly afraid of going bald. Whatever experiences you have had they do not line up with my own at all.

Like I told you in another thread, I was at a party recently with 40 guys in their thirties and not a single one was bald. I am a NW3A and had the most aggressive hair loss of anyone there. Why do you think that is?

So travel, broaden your horizons. Find new social circles. I'll give you one bit of advice for free which people won't like but it is true; as much as people here want to combat baldness there is a high probablity that they won't. That's not to say that they shouldn't try but generally genetics will win over. Even those with hair transplants and drugs; most people here who have balding genetics will be left with the appearance of thinning hair or at least certainly not 'full hair'. Maybe one or two who only had minor localised thinning might be lucky but the vast majority here will either go bald or look balding and have to face up to that sooner or later. You can spend your whole life worrying about it or carry on regardless. If the social circles that you hang in are genuinely so superficial that they would not accept you bald then I personally wouldn't waste my time with such people. You will always deep down be thinking about your hair loss and seeking approval.

As I said, I had a social circle that couldn't handle my hair loss. I could see their dislike, I could see a sense of hatred for me adopting a shaved head etc. I got mocked for it and called names. One even decided to make jokes about me looking like I had cancer etc. What a guy aye? Some of them used to be really good mates and it hurt a lot to see their perceptions change so quickly. By no means am I 'blue pill' about this. I've experienced real pain over it previously. These reactions from them came while on a catch up holiday abroad in Europe. Know what I did? I thought 'f*ck it' I'm better than these guys, I won't waste my time with them and I went off on my own one night. Started being my normal sociable self chatting to randoms..."hey hows it going, where you from? Etc", and ended up teaming up with some American guy who happened to be in the US marines. Me and him had women hanging off us by the end of the night. I ended up going back to my hotel with a German girl and he went back with one of a group of 19-21 year old hot Brazilian girls (I could have also had one of her friends). The American guy was NW6 bald too although he was quite dark so I guess some people here would say it doesn't count.

The guys from my social circle were p*ssed the next day. Think I cared? Only one or two of them I would ever bother with again and since then I've made some great friends back home doing a pretty mixed range of activities.

Also, this idea that I am blue collar... Well I choose not to mix with overly pretentious people but I'm well educated with two degrees and put it this way I didn't get any help paying for the travel I previously mentioned. I have friends whose faces are messed up from fighting and friends who are very much white collar. As long as they are decent people I don't care.

 

[jd_uk]

Another classic cope from you: "just get better friends". Unfortunately, this is a flexibility I do not have. My career success and the majority of my life goals depend on being able to mix with people from a particular social strata and in this particular strata you cannot be bald. Hence my repeatedly asking you this question about why there were no bald men at that party. You finally answered and seem to have reached the same conclusion that I did.

I have travelled extensively and lived abroad for many years, not sure where you're getting the idea that I haven't. Cope4Life is another guy here who has been around a lot and seen the same things as I have; bald guys are mostly bottom feeder sh*t and almost never figure at the higher rungs of the social totem pole.

Are you seriously recommending I switch my entire career and social circle in order to gracefully go bald? Sorry, but I have to say that this is lunacy, it is completely f*****g insane what you are telling me to do here. I have chosen to have transplants and use concealers, which I have seen other people in my immediate vicinity do and which generally works. It won't perfectly replicate a thick pre-Androgenetic Alopecia NW1 appearance but it is good enough for me to go about my life without facing discrimination and reach the goals I have socially and professionally.

I haven't got time to make a big post again tonight but all I can say is that it is your choice. I can only say what I would do. Personally an environment/social circle in which people are so superficial would not mean much to me. Same with a girl who was completely turned off by baldness - personally, she would lose value to me. The most physically beautiful girl I ever met was intelligent, organised TED talks in her city, chaired science forums etc and she found me attractive with a grade 1 buzz all over. Her current boyfriend is obviously balding. That is the type of girl which I would want long term. We all only get one life, why would I waste it on people that can't accept a perfectly natural version of me? Sure...do your hair transplant...use your concealers if it makes you feel better but you should remain aware that hair transplant's can only ever give the illusion of a full head of hair. I've met quite a few people who have had hair transplant's in real life and even the ones who look good in photos aren't so great in real life. Maybe PM me with why your career entails you being in such a superficial environment...perhaps then I will understand better.

Btw ..all this talk of 'cope' as if it is some sort of put down. Successful people 'cope' everyday in life. If you are not strong in one area then you make sure you are strong in others. The ability to adapt is a sign of a genuinely strong person in my opinion.

 

[plisk]

I do like that jd_uk at least tries to keep some of the delusional/schizophrenic nerds here in check, but I have to agree with zircon on the point of "natural" - no one gives a sh*t.

It is indeed true that many here blow it completely out of proportion, there are still many attractive women who will be attracted to you despite balding - i know this for a fact because otherwise i wouldve been on a dry spell for years now - but i cannot encourage the delusion that these women wouldnt be more attracted to you if you werent balding. They of course, would be.

The concept of accepting you as you "naturally" are is completely nebulous, for reasons i should hope you see as obvious.

 

[jd_uk]

People don't give a sh*t about "natural", they give a sh*t about "good". I look like rancid *** bald and no amount of time spent in the gym or clothes shopping will improve me. For most people, a well done transplant with concealers will look good. The very few people who notice will usually be trained Norwood spotters, i.e. other balding men like yourself.

If I were to do a particularly cruel interpretation of your posts, I would say it's obvious why you push this going bald gracefully line as hard as you do: Misery loves company. You cannot have a transplant yourself due to your diffuse hair loss type, and you cannot take finasteride due to side effects. Therefore you put down drugs and surgery, and encourage others to swim with you at the bottom of cave. Well, I will not join you but I acknowledge your perspective. It is wasted on me but it may not be wasted on others.

Be as cruel as you want...it's not going to affect me much. I have had far worse. I've been honest on this forum. Would I like to have the hair I had at 20? Yes. Am I a good candidate for a hair transplant? No. Does hair loss sometimes still bother me? Yes. Otherwise I would probably never check in here again. I don't know..maybe I would just out of old habit. The finasteride though - I've never had side effects. I've never tried it. I very much doubt that I ever will. Altering my hormones for hair is not something that I personally want to do. I can have a good life regardless. If others want to use finasteride or dutasteride then I am happy for them and won't criticise but we all have our own choices to make.

My opinion in this thread and on this forum is that people here are way, way too negative and need to get some perspective.

 

[shookwun]

Getting jacked, changing my style, and adopting a tight mind set never change the outcome of me getting laid. However, I forced myself outside my bubble and met women which aided me towards getting laid more. But when I look back, the numbers realy were no different. it was just easier to get laid when your in school, working part-time jobs because there are so many women in your life. Nowadays I must actively go out, and put in effort to meet women. Before hand, they just came. it was so fluent... you didn't need these stupid applications like Tindr. There were always parties to attend, Waking up in the morning and chicks adding you on FB. it was so easy to get laid. But once you hit the career life, and people start going there own ways, you enter adult life.

my point is nothing made a difference. Going to the gym, helped with my own self-esteem issues, and anxiety which helped loads. Changing my style never made an impact, all though when you are a teenager you tend to hang out, and dress similar to the crowd you roll with.

None of this cognitive sh*t made a difference.

My numbers didn't change. I was to shy, and insecure, loathed in low self-esteem to actively date when I was younger, but when I put the numbers together they are very similar to what I pull today. only difference is you have to push to meet people. I miss being a teenager and early twenty year old, always attending and getting invited to events. Having a huge social group, and always going to parties. Life was easy. Nowadays in this grown up life we have stupid sh*t like Tindr to meet women. f*** I miss those days of going to parties, and hooking up. Fun sh*t, not this gay swipe bullshit. Well I suppose thats the new adult way of meeting people, and it's here to stay.



'get some life experience' el oh el

it's all face, nothing changed. all that changed in my numbers was that my self-esteem improved, and I forced myself to meet women because I dont have the luxury anymore of sitting on my *** at a party, or rolling up to a pot luck and meeting different chicks every weekend. Even as a skinny c***, I had girls showing loads of interest in me.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Everyone's situation is different, jd. Some may indeed have an interpretation of their situation that is excessively gloomy. But their interpretation may also be excessively optimistic (what is often referred to as "delusional" around these parts). You seem to be positing yourself as a realist, which I acknowledge you may be. I think it follows from the argument I'm laying out here that a realist or balanced interpretation of certain life situations can lead an individual to correctly conclude that going bald may effectively close the door on what the individual considers a fulfilling life.

Personally, I'm very confident that I am correctly understanding the effects hair loss have and will have on my life, and that I am doing the right thing in not accepting it. If I saw convincing evidence contradicting my previous understanding I would readjust my views, as I have done on multiple occasions. But so far I have not. Rather, the more I see the more my views are consolidated. At this point I would personally rather die than live bald.

@jd_uk doesn't seem to realize, or at the very least acknolwedge, that he is privileged in numerous ways that help compensate for his hair loss.

- He has enough of a chameleon personality that he can just overturn his social life whenever a social circle rejects him;
- He has the physical frame and endocrine system necessary for robust athleticism;
- Good physical health;
- He's born in a rich country (England), which is a better place for the median person to be born in than say the USA or Italy;
- He has access to money, given that he's seen 30 countries in 6 years. I don't think he meant taking a train across Europe and seeing countries from the window of the train;
- His intelligence is above-average, as is evidenced from his posts which tend to be coherently written with a decent amount of content;

The effects of hair loss vary from person to person. If somebody has fewer advantages, it can be devastating, as they will fall below the minimum requirements needed to be accepted and valued by society.

 

[shookwun]

My numbers never improved either.

I put myself out there at the age of 21 and I could gauge what my 'value' was immediately.

And it never changed. Well, I struggled to get the girl once my hair line disappeared, but that period only lasted a year.

After my hair transplant, it was the same again. Three dates a week with looksmatched girls, half of them leading to sex.

My point is, your value is mostly fixed. Yes you can dress a little better, work out, get more hair, but in the end, your results are not going to change dramatically.

Once you have your basics covered, that you meet the minimal looks threshold required and you are a little entertaining, you're good.

This year, almost all the girls I was with wanted more of me, and this was a great feeling.

That's why I mostly don't worry about my personality anymore. But I have my moments, I can thank my dad for my shitty self-esteem.

What scares me the most is that my looks could take a turn for the worse, because of my hair of course.

I can't help it, I'm just paranoid about it, some days, I'd swear that my donor and my hair transplant are thinning.

But the reality is, it's still the same, with the crown slowly disintegrating of course.

Having low self-esteem, and anxiety will rekt havoc on your ability to meet people.

It's an going issue I face, despite fixing my aesthetics. I realised the problem is much deeper, and stems through years of insecurity.

I get anxiety in places that I other wise shouldn't. It's a real, and going problem I have to deal with.

I don't want to take drugs, but I fear that my anxiety is not the typical 'baldness induced' it's much deeper. I am paranoid, and face scattered thoughts, and feelings for no given reason. It goes far beyond feeling anxious because I don't like my aesthetics. That's a normal issue, this stems much deeper.

I don't even know what to do anymore. It seems to fluctuate.



I took a break from dating since July because I just cant fathom the energy to meet anyone at the moment. Most healthy people dont face this issue I seem to deal with. I have my moments where I suddenly feel good about myself, then actively meet people. I hit all time lows, then disappear of the face of earth.


I hate this issue of low self-esteem. it makes you a negative, and judgmental person.


My looks are not an issue for me. I get anxiety for no reason at all. i