Isnt it ironic that people are marrying later and balding earlier?

Oknow

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Confidence still isn't well defined to me. Neither is 'vibe'. Even if it can be well defined, it exists in somebody else's (an observer) consciousness not mine. I see many traditionally diffident guys doing great as long as they look good. @Feelsbadman used to be one before hair loss. Each person likes to feel like they are empowered and deserve their lot in life. "it wasn't my looks, which are god given, but my confidence that I worked on". I think that it's much more nuanced the same as somebody saying "it wasn't my expensive education paid for by my parents , i worked hard to get to where I am".

Cristiano Ronaldo works very hard but same for all Premier league superstars. He's top because he is genetically a perfect football player. Similarly, most kids who failed to go pro probably were lacking in raw skill, not confidence or mindset. So yes I don't buy the confidence theory. The day that confidence outperforms looks, I might start.

The best way to describe ‘vibe’ is how well you get on with someone mentally.

Putting dating aside, have you ever met people, where the moment you start talking to them, you get on like a house on fire. It feels effortless communicating with them and conversations are enjoyable.

That is what they basically mean by good vibe - it’s the mental connection, Women LOVE this with a guy they find attractive. The thing about vibe, it’s usually either there or it isn’t, you can’t fake it.

Take for example this forum, I get on with @DoctorHouse but think @disfiguredyoungman is a total ***. I knew fairly instantly how the interactions with the two people would go just by their communication style and outlook on life.

You need to meet someone where there is that mental connection who finds you attractive, where if one of the two is missing leads to not being successful.

Mental connection without physical attraction is platonic connection.

Physical attraction without mental connection usually leads to nothing too. I was in a situation recently where I met an attractive girl but her personality was so different to mine (similar to @disfiguredyoungman) that I found her unattractive.
 

Oknow

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The best way to describe ‘vibe’ is how well you get on with someone mentally.

Putting dating aside, have you ever met people, where the moment you start talking to them, you get on like a house on fire. It feels effortless communicating with them and conversations are enjoyable.

That is what they basically mean by good vibe - it’s the mental connection, Women LOVE this with a guy they find attractive. The thing about vibe, it’s usually either there or it isn’t, you can’t fake it.

Take for example this forum, I get on with @DoctorHouse but think @disfiguredyoungman is a total ***. I knew fairly instantly how the interactions with the two people would go just by their communication style and outlook on life.

You need to meet someone where there is that mental connection who finds you attractive, where if one of the two is missing leads to not being successful.

Mental connection without physical attraction is platonic connection.

Physical attraction without mental connection usually leads to nothing too. I was in a situation recently where I met an attractive girl but her personality was so different to mine (similar to @disfiguredyoungman) that I found her unattractive.

Part 2:

vibe is also non-communicative body language, people can pick up how you are feeling about yourself by your energy - stressed, happy etc

Women are VERY receptive towards this. They feed off positive energy , it’s like a drug for them - again you can’t hide it.

Which is why as a general rule of thumb you should not go on a date or communicate with them if you are feeling negative.
 

Oknow

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Part 2:

vibe is also non-communicative body language, people can pick up how you are feeling about yourself by your energy - stressed, happy etc

Women are VERY receptive towards this. They feed off positive energy , it’s like a drug for them - again you can’t hide it.

Which is why as a general rule of thumb you should not go on a date or communicate with them if you are feeling negative.
Confidence still isn't well defined to me. Neither is 'vibe'. Even if it can be well defined, it exists in somebody else's (an observer) consciousness not mine. I see many traditionally diffident guys doing great as long as they look good. @Feelsbadman used to be one before hair loss. Each person likes to feel like they are empowered and deserve their lot in life. "it wasn't my looks, which are god given, but my confidence that I worked on". I think that it's much more nuanced the same as somebody saying "it wasn't my expensive education paid for by my parents , i worked hard to get to where I am".

Cristiano Ronaldo works very hard but same for all Premier league superstars. He's top because he is genetically a perfect football player. Similarly, most kids who failed to go pro probably were lacking in raw skill, not confidence or mindset. So yes I don't buy the confidence theory. The day that confidence outperforms looks, I might start.

Part 3

Lot's of guys that are inexperienced with women, and dating, which is sounds like you are often think it's all about being chad like/good looking where personality accounts for sh*t. This is further from the truth.

Women look at the overall package, after you go on lots of dates, you start to understand that personality is a huge factor in their decision making.

If you go on a date, even if she thinks you are good looking, and you are boring as f*** on it from having a dry personality, have weird tendencies that freak her out, I guarantee she will reject you. I have heard women describe guys they have gone on first dates with as being a bit of weirdo which is why it didn't go onto a second date.
 

vondoom

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he should get one to understand that it’s not the magic bullet

he thinks that if you have hair , it’s easy mode , when it’s a lot more work than that
yeah as if life was ever that easy... pathetic...
 

vondoom

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Yeah without confidence you will get passed on tbh tbh, Confidence is harder the less hair you have, but after shaving off it does not seem like that much of a problem anymore. Nevertheless you just can't expevt to work it out without confidence, looks only get you through the door
i dont know how you define confidence, but it is enough when you dont come over like she is the first woman you ever met besides yo mutha^^
 

Oknow

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and then something else^^
there is ways something to blame, it is very easy to find something...

Then start comparing themselves to others, 'oh it's because of x, y, z reason you are successful'

Missing the point, that it is a total numbers game, win some, lose some
 

vondoom

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Then start comparing themselves to others, 'oh it's because of x, y, z reason you are successful'

Missing the point, that it is a total numbers game, win some, lose some
lol yeah “i dont make 200 000 a year, fcos i stand no chance”...
dude, only the top 2% score these days...
under 7'? it never began!
 

Oknow

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lol yeah “i dont make 200 000 a year, fcos i stand no chance”...
dude, only the top 2% score these days...
under 7'? it never began!
Lol
I think the problem is where a lot of these guys are too outcome oriented, and put too much emphasis on women liking them.

I wrote on here in the past, my best dates have been ones where I just rock up without any expectations, for the banter and see where the night takes us.

if a girl likes me great, if not, f*** her
 

vondoom

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Lol
I think the problem is where a lot of these guys are too outcome oriented, and put too much emphasis on women liking them.

I wrote on here in the past, my best dates have been ones where I just rock up without any expectations, for the banter and see where the night takes us.

if a girl likes me great, if not, f*** her
well a lot of people concentrate on nothing else but “getting” a woman...
that is where it really never began...
 

Oknow

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well a lot of people concentrate on nothing else but “getting” a woman...
that is where it really never began...
Interesting point
You know, I’ve always found that when I’m thirsty like @Feelsbadman , doesn’t happen for me.

When I just trust the process, focus on just getting to know someone, living in the moment and genuinely feel that way, that’s when the magic happens.

f*** knows why things works this way.
 

vondoom

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Interesting point
You know, I’ve always found that when I’m thirsty like @Feelsbadman , doesn’t happen for me.

When I just trust the process, focus on just getting to know someone, living in the moment and genuinely feel that way, that’s when the magic happens.

f*** knows why things works this way.
doesnt matter why...
whatever works for you, works...
 

disfiguredyoungman

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Physical attraction without mental connection usually leads to nothing too. I was in a situation recently where I met an attractive girl but her personality was so different to mine (similar to @disfiguredyoungman) that I found her unattractive.
Your obsession with me is getting really gay undertones, pal.
 

KevinEdEddEddy

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Confidence still isn't well defined to me. Neither is 'vibe'. Even if it can be well defined, it exists in somebody else's (an observer) consciousness not mine. I see many traditionally diffident guys doing great as long as they look good. @Feelsbadman used to be one before hair loss. Each person likes to feel like they are empowered and deserve their lot in life. "it wasn't my looks, which are god given, but my confidence that I worked on". I think that it's much more nuanced the same as somebody saying "it wasn't my expensive education paid for by my parents , i worked hard to get to where I am".

Cristiano Ronaldo works very hard but same for all Premier league superstars. He's top because he is genetically a perfect football player. Similarly, most kids who failed to go pro probably were lacking in raw skill, not confidence or mindset. So yes I don't buy the confidence theory. The day that confidence outperforms looks, I might start.
Lmao If you are a trucel nothing will help you, I can't imagine a NW7 obese midget to pull something, it's that without confidence you will never pull sh*t. Even if you are a literal Tyler Maher, if you believe you are disgusting pile of sh*t you will get ghosted and news will spread you are a weirdo. It's true that hairloss limits your possibilities because you are rarely looking better, but even then you need confidence because there are girls who do not mind hairloss or just it is not that of a defect for them. Without looks you do not attract people at all, without confidence you are going nowhere with people you attracted
 

Oknow

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Lmao If you are a trucel nothing will help you, I can't imagine a NW7 obese midget to pull something, it's that without confidence you will never pull sh*t. Even if you are a literal Tyler Maher, if you believe you are disgusting pile of sh*t you will get ghosted and news will spread you are a weirdo. It's true that hairloss limits your possibilities because you are rarely looking better, but even then you need confidence because there are girls who do not mind hairloss or just it is not that of a defect for them. Without looks you do not attract people at all, without confidence you are going nowhere with people you attracted

This is a good post.
I think people need to accept not everybody is equal but I truly believe there is someone for everyone. It just happens the more attractive you are the more opportunities you have.

There is a TV show in the UK called the ‘undateables’ , where ugly people shack up.
 

KevinEdEddEddy

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This is a good post.
I think people need to accept not everybody is equal but I truly believe there is someone for everyone. It just happens the more attractive you are the more opportunities you have.

There is a TV show in the UK called the ‘undateables’ , where ugly people shack up.
Yeah tbh I found a girl who although is not a miss universe and is not ideal, she fell in love with me and I think I fall in love too. Maybe she is not the best I could get but I believe that I can be happy with her
 

doubleindemnity

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Lmao If you are a trucel nothing will help you, I can't imagine a NW7 obese midget to pull something, it's that without confidence you will never pull sh*t. Even if you are a literal Tyler Maher, if you believe you are disgusting pile of sh*t you will get ghosted and news will spread you are a weirdo. It's true that hairloss limits your possibilities because you are rarely looking better, but even then you need confidence because there are girls who do not mind hairloss or just it is not that of a defect for them. Without looks you do not attract people at all, without confidence you are going nowhere with people you attracted
I reiterate that I don't think that confidence is a thing. Looks and proficiency. Good looks leads to more success which leads to more proficiency. You might call that confidence but it's proficiency in the 'courting process'.
 

doubleindemnity

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This is a good post.
I think people need to accept not everybody is equal but I truly believe there is someone for everyone. It just happens the more attractive you are the more opportunities you have.

There is a TV show in the UK called the ‘undateables’ , where ugly people shack up.
I disagree. Consider a bald guy who is successful and in great shape. He's bald so that matches him with overweight people on his level. But he's in shape so overweight are likely to have a different lifestyle and be incompatible! Arguing like this, there's nobody for him not necessarily because he's too unattractive overall but because he won't find anybody compatible at his level of attractiveness. This is basically what @Feelsbadman seems to experience. Baldness screws up everything and the only way out is to treat the hair loss.
 
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