Memoirs Of A Landwhale. Blah Blah Blah

[hairblues]

I would never do that.

OK so my girlfriend is a rape victim now.
".

NO... i mean the situation that happened with my friend not 'you'...

A stranger came and put his dick in her...not her BF or lover a complete stranger while she was unconsocus at her friends house.

dont put your dick in an unconscious strangers...NOT you and your GF thats blatantly obvious.

 

[hairblues]

Probably not 87 of these girls. They might not discuss it one or two or three months into a relationship.

most likely not ever going to say a word about it to a lover or BF...I probably would not.

 

[pjhair]

My girlfriend had sex when passed-out drunk and she told the guy to stop several times, he didn't, came inside her, and she was forced to take a morning-after pill.

Yet she doesn't consider herself a victim of rape, she's aware that what happened was partially her fault. She hasn't started a feminist blog where she cries about how much of a victim she was.

If the guy had sex with her despite her saying no, it was rape. Her opinion on the matter is irrelevant. She never consented to have sex. The dude was a scumbag and should be behind bars.

 

[SmoothSailing]

I know! But what's going to happen is going to happen anyway.

True. But when trying to work out ways to stop this happening in the future you have to conclude who's actions to tackle. Do we make it law that you can't wear that t shirt in those neighborhoods? Or do we try and enforce the law that says you can't beat someone to death for wearing a tshirt?

Obviously the latter. It doesn't make you any less stupid for doing it in the first place, but it's important not to blame you, as stupidity shouldn't be punishable like this.

 

[Dench57]

Because the victim might be scared for her life? It's common knowledge that you don't use force back against an attacker that is stronger than you or has a weapon, might make the situation much worse.

When I was 16 I was walking home one night, early hours of the morning and still dark. Some Polish thug, shaved head, muscular, twice my size and probably twice my age punches me hard in the face as I'm walking past, out of nowhere. In a dark alley late at night. Did I bother fighting back? Did I f***. I was scared he would pull a knife on me. Had no idea what he was capable of. Not like a normal street fight out in town or something. I grappled/tried to defend myself but I didn't bother striking back because there was only going to be one winner. If a woman is being raped by a man twice her physical power, and there's nobody within earshot to help, I imagine most just want to close their eyes and get it over with as quickly as possible.

 

[Dench57]

Thank god for her, she's not in a relationship with a feminist neckbeard who would try to convince her that she was raped.

She was raped. Didn't you say she was unconscious?

 

[hairblues]

As I've said, the responsibility is shared.

You can't put 100% of the blame on the perpetrator.

And you can't put 100% of the blame on the victim.

If I go to the hot neighborhoods of my city wearing a shirt that says "I hate Arabs", it is partially my fault if I get beaten to death, provided I know a little about human nature.

okay from a LEGAl standing this is irrelevant

LEGALLY in a court of law the fact should be based solely on if a man forced a woman to have sex with him.

here is rape for USA
it has to be proven beyond a reasonable doubt that the accused subjected another person to sexual penetration and overcame the victim by force, threat of force, coercion, or deception.

Mitigating circumstances of when, where who what why etc only matter as it pertains to above.

Your talking about personal liability not legal law.

 

[Dench57]

Yeah that's rape buddy

 

[SmoothSailing]

Her anecdote really got me thinking about how rampant this victim mentality was.

Different people take things differently. I mean if one of my guy mates had oral performed on him when he was sleeping, by a hot girl, it would be rape. But I don't think I'd try and convince him to feel like sh*t if he was just laughing about it. Doesn't mean it's right, nor does it mean someone else isn't entitled to react differently.

It's like if someone's car was stolen but they didn't care. The robbery was wrong but I don't think anyone going to try and convince the guy to cry about it.

 

[pjhair]

She doesn't see that way and is still living in La La land.

And I love that about her.

Thank god for her, she's not in a relationship with a feminist neckbeard who would try to convince her that she was raped.

Yes, the fact that it was rape crossed my mind, or I wouldn't be mentioning it here.

What now? Do you think I should convince her to become depressed, traumatized, neurotic, to start a feminist blog about her being a survivor?

Her anecdote really got me thinking about how rampant this victim mentality was.

I don't want your girl friend to be depressed or traumatized and you shouldn't be reminding her that she was raped.Better leave that incident in the past and move on. But that doesn't change the fact that she was indeed raped. Also, I have many disagreements with western feminists too and find them overzealous and downright idiotic on issues such as Islam. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't label rape as rape. Every time there is a lack of consent for sex, it should be correctly called rape. People who commit it should be behind bars.

I consider false accusation of rape as a real problem as I have seen lives destroyed because of it. But it doesn't mean real rape doesn't happen. It does and should be taken very seriously.

 

[pjhair]

That's not the right comparison.

I was comparing this situation with a girl finding herself passed-out drunk in bed with a horny guy.

It's partially her fault.

But still, if a girl wears a 'slutty' skirt in a bad neighborhood, she should know that actions have consequences.
Whether it's right or wrong (it is wrong of course!), that's not the point here.

Rape is never a victims fault. It is always, always fault of the person who commits it. Just because a women is walking around in revealing clothes or even naked, it doesn't give a man right to rape her.

 

[CopeForLife]

If I recall, a video of the girl having sex with 5-6 guys (including the guy who made the video itself) at a house party, while she was tipsy but not drunk enough not to realize what she was doing. She asked the guys (all good-looking athletes) to bang her. Truly a sl*t.

I need to see it

 

[hairblues]

I do, and she thinks that herself, and she is not wrong.

I know a few policemen, and if she woke up the next morning and headed down to the police station (after having gone to the pharmacy for her morning-after pill) and told them what happened, they would laugh at her face.

Because no matter what happened, it's her word against his, it can't be proven anyway, case dismissed.

That's harsh but that's how it is. They won't convict a guy based on her word alone.

Thank god.

If you're advocating for that, you're just asking for more false rape accusations.

Maybe they are not all false as you put it

maybe they are unprovable.

i mean there is a ratio there of actual rapes not being provable.

JUST based on that, you cant have a stance that 'no rapes' or 'not many rapes' especially in USA.

there are rapes in society that are in fact rape and go unproven unreported etc.

its NOT to say some are not false accusations there are always false accusations about everything that get people into trouble (Salem Witch Trials i doubt there was real magic happening)

 

[hairblues]

@WhitePolarBear

Its actually okay to just not know for sure...one way or the other.

You can have uncertainty case by case.

You just have to allow the possibility that it did happen or at the very least that is her experience.

if it was legal rape or not i dont know.

legal rape is very hard to prove at least in USA courts.

 

[hairblues]

I don't think women really understand how it is to be a horny guy with a half-naked girl next to you in bed.

My girlfriend was all over that guy all night before she was in bed with him, the reason she didn't want to have sex was because she felt sick, not because she was not sexually attracted to that guy.

I'm not justifying it. Again, I believe it is wrong. But human nature is human nature and girls should be aware of it.

This is what strong father figures were for, so that their daughters would never find themselves in that situation.

Did I say it was wrong already?

You are not wrong women should be careful

BUT i have some issue with this...

ITs actually if you think about it the same thing the far left feminist do and the muslims do that you dislike

its saying men are uncontrollable in some situations. They lack self control

I disagree with this.

I have known many men in my life MANY and have been in many sexual experiences that IF what you say is true i would have been raped many many times.

its kind of unfair to men to say this.

 

[hairblues]

You did, very late in the debate, yes.
I am actually not the kind who has black and white vision about anything (I hope so), but the fact you were saying rape was "rare" and girls stories don't make any sense, etc. with a bit of arrogance... I felt obligated to push the debate this time!

it was actually a great debate. Considering many of our debates here are superficial stuff.

 

[Dench57]

I don't think women really understand how it is to be a horny guy with a half-naked girl next to you in bed. A girl that was all over you that evening and all of a sudden is like "Nah don't want to anymore!".

Guys?

yeah pretty annoying

still pretty sure i wouldn't rape her

 

[hairblues]

I've been in those situations myself many times, being a half-beta male that isn't handsome enough to the point that women will submit to my urges at any time.

Believe me, when you've spent a whole day with a girl, a whole evening where she passionately made out with you, grabbed your crotch a few times, told you that she wanted you so bad, only to be told in her bed, so close to actual sex: "Sorry, I'm not in the mood anymore."

This is hard to get yourself together, insanely hard. Any guy will try to push it forward, which is what I did, and most of the time, the girl caved in... .... You're going to tell me I'm a rapist now I guess?

But seriously though, in the situation described above, there is little room for rational thought and 'doing the right thing' in that moment.

No, you are not a rapist.

there is a line between seducing a woman and actual rape.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

yeah pretty annoying

still pretty sure i wouldn't rape her

Yes, I would be annoyed and I might cut her out from my life.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Women can be difficult to navigate sometimes.

A while back, I complimented a female friend on her weight loss, she was infuriated with me, as I implied that she was fat before.
I met up with two female friends a while back, different friends and unrelated social circle, they told me they were mad at me because I hadn't complimented them on their weight loss.