This Place Is Somewhat Good But It Has Had A Negative Impact On My Mindset

[Johnt1997]

Elaborate that redpill incident

The girl in question is someone I had been speaking to for a month or two - we'd met about 4/5 times and she was very attracted to me(she made up some bullshit excuse to come to my house before she'd even met in person, messaged me loads and could be quite clingy). The one thing she didn' like about me was my hair but I don' think she knew it was because of balding initially, tbf I did need a haircut as my hair was too long and exaggerated my hairline

When in bed with her she ran her hands through my hair exposing the hairline and I saw the realisation dawning on her - it was a look of disgust mixed with panic(it's not a great look to be on the receiving end of)

Antway, after that she was acting pretty much the same as before and still liked me. She left and I had to go to work. This was 18 months ago so bit sketchy on these details but basically we never text for the week after that.

The next weekend was a bank holiday so we were making plans but eventually she just asked me over to her mums. The thing was she'd asked me to bring drink over for her party that night(she'd only just turned 16 and i was 18) and shed pay me back when she could(it was like £35 lol). I stayed at hers for a couple hours but she was much more distant and then noticed my bald spot on crown and made a comment on it - I blurted out some cope about it still being small but she didn't agree. She then went out to go and get her friends over while I waited, I hung about with them for a while and then left(don' know why she introduced me to her friends, still confuses me to this day)

In the weeks after this, she never initiated contact with me but replied to my messages. I then tried no contact and I've not spoken to her in 2 years since. About a month after trying no contact, I was scrolling through Instagram and she'd put up a photo with another boy, I was done.

From strong interest to cold disinterest in a week. It took me more than 6 months to properly get over the feelings of humiliation but I used it as motivation get a better job, etc. Now I'm in a far better place than I was 2 years ago and looking back it was a turning point in my life. I still see the girl out and about and on social media but doesn't bother me now

sh*t that was long haha

 

[DoctorHouse]

You can't live all your life being a recluse or in a NEET lifestyle. I had acne and I tried it for a year and it made a me a miserable person. I realised that I cannot live my life in this manner,being away from people and having no one to talk to. I'm a very introvert guy but still I couldn't take it. Online games,music,tv etc can only do so much to alleviate your miseries. We are social animals,most of us,and we can't live a good life without being with someone. No matter how bad we are,there's always someone who can resonate with us and make us feel good. I say throw away the red pill and live in ignorance. It's a bliss they said,very well they said.

You remind me of myself when I was your age. You still have no hair loss at this point. But I think your acne affected you alot. It did for me. I know acne is not nearly as bad as balding at a young age but it was still hard to conceal. At least if you are balding you can wear a hat. With acne everyone sees it even if you wear make up and what guy wants to wear make up. I had to wear concealer otherwise I would have never left my house. If I break out I still use concealer and use it on areas I still have discoloration. When I was growing up, it would sound totally gay if you did that. Now they have make up for men. I would say cystic acne and balding would be the worst two things to have at the same time at a young age.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Did it for 4 months . That's what I'm saying. You can't do that for long mate. We really need people around us,we are social beings. You can't be a ghost forever.

I feel I could have.

In an ideal world i'd probably socialize once a week - and ideally with a woman in my bedroom for the night as well.

The rest of the week I get enough socializing in the gym, food shopping, and in online conversations.

If I socialize more than 3 times per week I feel drained.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

The girl in question is someone I had been speaking to for a month or two - we'd met about 4/5 times and she was very attracted to me(she made up some bullshit excuse to come to my house before she'd even met in person, messaged me loads and could be quite clingy). The one thing she didn' like about me was my hair but I don' think she knew it was because of balding initially, tbf I did need a haircut as my hair was too long and exaggerated my hairline

When in bed with her she ran her hands through my hair exposing the hairline and I saw the realisation dawning on her - it was a look of disgust mixed with panic(it's not a great look to be on the receiving end of)

Antway, after that she was acting pretty much the same as before and still liked me. She left and I had to go to work. This was 18 months ago so bit sketchy on these details but basically we never text for the week after that.

The next weekend was a bank holiday so we were making plans but eventually she just asked me over to her mums. The thing was she'd asked me to bring drink over for her party that night(she'd only just turned 16 and i was 18) and shed pay me back when she could(it was like £35 lol). I stayed at hers for a couple hours but she was much more distant and then noticed my bald spot on crown and made a comment on it - I blurted out some cope about it still being small but she didn't agree. She then went out to go and get her friends over while I waited, I hung about with them for a while and then left(don' know why she introduced me to her friends, still confuses me to this day)

In the weeks after this, she never initiated contact with me but replied to my messages. I then tried no contact and I've not spoken to her in 2 years since. About a month after trying no contact, I was scrolling through Instagram and she'd put up a photo with another boy, I was done.

From strong interest to cold disinterest in a week. It took me more than 6 months to properly get over the feelings of humiliation but I used it as motivation get a better job, etc. Now I'm in a far better place than I was 2 years ago and looking back it was a turning point in my life. I still see the girl out and about and on social media but doesn't bother me now

sh*t that was long haha

Its been said before but the abundance mentality is key to avoiding getting hurt by one person.

When you know that there are plenty of singletons waiting to date and meet you then you don't give two shits about if one woman likes you or not.

 

[Johnt1997]

Its been said before but the abundance mentality is key to avoiding getting hurt by one person.

When you know that there are plenty of singletons waiting to date and meet you then you don't give two shits about if one woman likes you or not.

I actually knew this at the time and I was familiar with all these kinds of things but I got sucked in by this girl

 

[Seeker988]

You remind me of myself when I was your age. You still have no hair loss at this point. But I think your acne affected you alot. It did for me. I know acne is not nearly as bad as balding at a young age but it was still hard to conceal. At least if you are balding you can wear a hat. With acne everyone sees it even if you wear make up and what guy wants to wear make up. I had to wear concealer otherwise I would have never left my house. If I break out I still use concealer and use it on areas I still have discoloration. When I was growing up, it would sound totally gay if you did that. Now they have make up for men. I would say cystic acne and balding would be the worst two things to have at the same time at a young age.

The feeling of impending hairloss coupled with the anxiety that I've faced in the past because of acne has killed my social life. But it's still not as bad as the people portray over here. Reading some posts from impact section really made me weep sometimes

 

[DoctorHouse]

The feeling of impending hairloss coupled with the anxiety that I've faced in the past because of acne has killed my social life. But it's still not as bad as the people portray over here. Reading some posts from impact section really made me weep sometimes

Luckily I never thought about my hair too much when I was younger. Acne and all the teasing I got from it along with people saying I had a disease like Leprosy did a huge number on my self esteem. And I was built like you Seeker(ectomorph) so that was another problem for me. I was able to build my muscles up to look decent enough but my legs and calf muscles never had the genetics to get me satisfied. I never would wear shorts. All this led to my BDD but I never knew that was what you would call it. I just hated my looks. And was a huge introvert.

 

[Oknow]

Luckily I never thought about my hair too much when I was younger. Acne and all the teasing I got from it along with people saying I had a disease like Leprosy did a huge number on my self esteem. And I was built like you Seeker(ectomorph) so that was another problem for me. I was able to build my muscles up to look decent enough but my legs and calf muscles never had the genetics to get me satisfied. I never would wear shorts. All this led to my BDD but I never knew that was what you would call it. I just hated my looks. And was a huge introvert.

Similar to you, I used to get bullied over being skinny, I have put on more weight now. People can be cruel.

 

[Seeker988]

Me being an ectomorph freaks me out. My brother is balding but atleast he has a full beard and a decent stocky body to pull it of. The only advantage that I have is that I'm tall. Skinny body,no beard and on top of that facial features of a twink will truly destroy me if I ever have significant hairloss in the future. I keep thinking about this. I wake in the middle of the night to check my pillow for hair,check every hair strand that I shed for its thickness etc. My life has been destroyed by this BDD bullshit. I don't want my faith on this world to waiver,I refuse to believe that world is that biased and bad towards balding guys. If it is,I might as well kill myself if I face significant hairloss.

 

[DoctorHouse]

Similar to you, I used to get bullied over being skinny, I have put on more weight now. People can be cruel.

Yes, at least you had enough sense not to go wacky like Nikolas Cruz.

 

[DoctorHouse]

Me being an ectomorph freaks me out. My brother is balding but atleast he has a full beard and a decent stocky body to pull it of. The only advantage that I have is that I'm tall. Skinny body,no beard and on top of that facial features of a twink will truly destroy me if I ever have significant hairloss in the future. I keep thinking about this. I wake in the middle of the night to check my pillow for hair,check every hair strand that I shed for its thickness etc. My life has been destroyed by this BDD bullshit. I don't want my faith on this world to waiver,I refuse to believe that world is that biased and bad towards balding guys. If it is,I might as well kill myself if I face significant hairloss.

I was tall too. I never had an issue with height. I feel bad for you as I know exactly how you are feeling right now. My brother was not tall but he had a great head of hair( better than mine), great natural build(mesomorph) and was better looking than me. I was so jealous and even my mom said he was better looking than me. Now it's the opposite. I am better looking, have more hair, and he is out of shape. So life can turn the table on you in a good way or bad way.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

The feeling of impending hairloss coupled with the anxiety that I've faced in the past because of acne has killed my social life. But it's still not as bad as the people portray over here. Reading some posts from impact section really made me weep sometimes

Acne knocked my confidence more at the time - especially being a teen when you are most vulnerable - but hair loss has that feeling, unlike acne, that it will never get better.

 

[Seeker988]

Acne knocked my confidence more at the time - especially being a teen when you are most vulnerable - but hair loss has that feeling, unlike acne, that it will never get better.

Acne gets better.1 year,2 years,5 years can't say but it'll get better unless you're really fucked up. Hairloss is destined to disfigure you further and further and further. I would take acne any f*****g day over hairloss. No brainer

 

[Oknow]

Acne knocked my confidence more at the time - especially being a teen when you are most vulnerable - but hair loss has that feeling, unlike acne, that it will never get better.

I sometimes wonder how different I would be if I never had it.

Whilst I have a lot of hair I feel as though I am under pressure to settle down. Deep down, if i didn't have hairloss, I would not be and play around.

I have gone on dates, openly hearing women criticise other guys looks because they had less hair on their head...brutal

 

[Seeker988]

I was tall too. I never had an issue with height. I feel bad for you as I know exactly how you are feeling right now. My brother was not tall but he had a great head of hair( better than mine), great natural build(mesomorph) and was better looking than me. I was so jealous and even my mom said he was better looking than me. Now it's the opposite. I am better looking, have more hair, and he is out of shape. So life can turn the table on you in a good way or bad way.

I never believe in God but this fear of possible hairloss has me praying to god everyday to prevent me from going bald. Maybe it's a way of that idiot god to make me bow down to him and make me realise that god exists

 

[JohnsonDDG]

I sometimes wonder how different I would be if I never had it.

Whilst I have a lot of hair I feel as though I am under pressure to settle down. Deep down, if i didn't have hairloss, I would not be and play around.

I have gone on dates, openly hearing women criticise other guys looks because they had less hair on their head...brutal

Yeah, I've heard it said by at least 5 women I've dated.

- One shouted at a bald villain on tv; and then said 'I hate baldies.'

- One of them just turned around once and said, 'never go fully bald'.

- Another one I was dating for months and I showed her a picture of when I shaved my head bald (it looked decent and a few people on here said they even liked it) and yet when I asked her if she would have swiped right on me with no hair: she just shrugged and said 'probably not.'

It hurts most when they don't know you have hair loss (strong concealing game) as they are revealing their true feelings.

Its just a hard pill to swallow

 

[Seeker988]

Yeah, I've heard it said by at least 5 women I've dated.

- One shouted at a bald villain on tv; and then said 'I hate baldies.'

- One of them just turned around once and said, 'never go fully bald'.

- Another one I was dating for months and I showed her a picture of when I shaved my head bald (it looked decent and a few people on here said they even liked it) and yet when I asked her if she would have swiped right on me with no hair: she just shrugged and said 'probably not.'

It hurts most when they don't know you have hair loss (strong concealing game) as they are revealing their true feelings.

Its just a hard pill to swallow

Drastic things call for drastic measures. Of course it would take a brutal bluepill intaker to not realize that his worth in the casual sex department is fucked when inflicted by male pattern baldness. But is that all you want?? Is casual sex the only thing that'll make you realise your true worth and make you happy? One shouldn't be stupid enough to think that he will attract the same female attraction that he used to before hairloss. But sometimes the users over here feel as if f*****g random girls is the only thing that matters. You'll be fucked in the casual sex department for sure,but you'll eventually find someone. How f*****g rude are the people of the west. How dare they comment on a random bypassers looks and features??? It's not the same in the east though. They'll ignore you

 

[ZZmop]

Its been said before but the abundance mentality is key to avoiding getting hurt by one person.

When you know that there are plenty of singletons waiting to date and meet you then you don't give two shits about if one woman likes you or not.

Think I remember you saying you don’t take finasteride. Did you try it and have sides or do you just never want to take it for fear of them?

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Think I remember you saying you don’t take finasteride. Did you try it and have sides or do you just never want to take it for fear of them?

I actually took it for a year with minoxidil but it I continued to lose hair at the normal rate.

My hair loss has progressed at a snails rate over the last 10 years - I've gone from nw1 to nw3 diffusing.

I'm lucky compared to some on here but unlucky compared to the average 31 year old.

My only real hope is a hair transplant (or just accepting it).

 

[kj6723]

Impact section is nowehere close to what it was before though. More soft.

I think threads from 2016 are the best. We lost quite a few members like DBW, FredTheDutch.

The golden era

Maybe if DBW made another comeback we would be returned to former glory....sadly I think we may never see him again

DBW = impact GOAT