You're at the worst stage right now, i remember feeling like complete sh*t when i was at it myself. But the good news is that eventually your brain will get tired and you won't give a single sh*t anymore. You will feel apathetic, but it's better than feeling like complete sh*t. You will just accept it and give up
You need to power through it though. You're vulnerable now due to your mental state, but just don't do any stupid decisions that you will regret later like f*****g trannies or becoming a tranny yourself