For those who think they will never get a decent looking girlfriend

[pjhair]

I have been on this forum for few months now. I see that too often people make extreme statements regarding a bald guy’s prospect of getting a good looking girlfriend. I am not going to sugarcoat it. Hair loss severely impacts the way we look. It also impacts our chances of success with a women. But is there reason to lose all hope and think one can never find a decent girlfriend/wife? I will say, no. There are plenty of bald or short guys with decent looking women and girlfriends. Don’t take my word for it. Just look around you and see it for yourself. If you dream about being a player type guy who sleeps with a different women every week, then yes, hair loss will make it extremely hard or, barring few exceptions, even impossible. But if all you want is a long term girlfriend, then it’s possible, given you have fixed everything else in your life such as your mental health, career, physique etc. All you need is to get out and meet people in real life. Not just in bar/clubs, but other social settings as well. So next time when you feel hopeless, ask yourself, what do you really want? If you want to be a player, then yes you have reason to be disappointed. But if all you want is a girlfriend/wife, there is still hope.

This forum is so much focused on looks that people seemed to believe that looks are everything. It is simply not true. In some situations looks may be everything, for example if you are trying to pick up a women in bar. But looks are not enough for a lasting happy relationship. It takes a lot more than looks. Yesterday, a classmate of mine posted pics of his family on Facebook. He was NW5 in college. He was of average height and face. He started dating this good looking women back then. It’s been over eight years and they are still happily married. They have a child now. I was NW2 when I started dating my ex-wife. She is a really nice women but still my relationship only lasted 3 years. So there is this NW5 guy who is happily married for over eight years and I, the NW2, couldn’t even get past three. My classmates wife and my ex-wife are on the same level look wise. So what does that tell you? There are far too many variables when it comes to a relationship. Looks are very important, but so are other things. It’s important to pay attention to other important things as well if you want to be happy in a relationship and life. I am concerned that people on this forum are so focused on looks, they will be in for a disappointment if and when they get married. This extreme negativity is only going to hurt you. And please don't tell me, "Oh you are not completely bald so you wouldn't know how tough it is for a bald man to get a women". Of course I don't know what it feels like to be completely bald. But I have eyes and I can see that there are plenty of bald or short guys who are happily married. No matter what you say, you CAN'T change this fact.

 

[pjhair]

Maybe because this IS true? Oh, and if you were as ugly as me, you'd know that all too well. But no, women don't reject me because I'm ugly, skinny, and balding, but only because I lack confidence. Confidence frames your face, doesn't it?

It is not really up for debate. There are bald guys with decent looking women. So it is POSSIBLE for bald people to get women. It is a fact. How you or other bald people feel about it is irrelevant. Just because someone feels 2 + 2 = 5. It doesn't mean it is.

 

[pjhair]

That is not the only example of a bald guy with women. I can post pics from my Facebook of average looking bald guys with women. But I don't want to post someones picture without their permission. I recommend everyone to look around and observe things in real life.

 

[pjhair]

Yeah, and how many bald guys are as "confident" as him?

Really bad argument. Him or guys like him are NOT the only examples of bald guys with women.

 

[g.i joey]

lol pj you're completely right, but some of these people have some serious self esteem issues. I appreciate what you're trying to do and i completely agree 100% but some people are convinced... and i mean, maybe these people were ugly before hairloss and this really tipped them over the edge... you can't speak generally like that on this forum

 

[Agustin Araujo]

pjhair, you made an excellent post, and a totally valid one. I will admit and have admitted before that I've never had a girlfriend. And about getting a decent looking one, I don't know about that happening. I suffer from a disability called Asperger's Syndrome and has impacted my life very negatively. For me, it's been a much bigger problem than going bald at a young age and considering ASD impacts my daily function.

Yes, bald and balding men can be with women, there's absolutely no doubt that hair loss hurts your chances but it's possible. The thing is some individuals are not the most attractive ones around even when they have a full head of hair and hardly/never feel good about themselves. Then hair loss occurs, they feel crippled, and becomes a burden that's too great to overcome. Not many things in life is a one size fits all solution, and overcoming hair loss certainly isn't one of them.

 

[jd_uk]

I have been on this forum for few months now. I see that too often people make extreme statements regarding a bald guy’s prospect of getting a good looking girlfriend. I am not going to sugarcoat it. Hair loss severely impacts the way we look. It also impacts our chances of success with a women. But is there reason to lose all hope and think one can never find a decent girlfriend/wife? I will say, no. There are plenty of bald or short guys with decent looking women and girlfriends. Don’t take my word for it. Just look around you and see it for yourself. If you dream about being a player type guy who sleeps with a different women every week, then yes, hair loss will make it extremely hard or, barring few exceptions, even impossible. But if all you want is a long term girlfriend, then it’s possible, given you have fixed everything else in your life such as your mental health, career, physique etc. All you need is to get out and meet people in real life. Not just in bar/clubs, but other social settings as well. So next time when you feel hopeless, ask yourself, what do you really want? If you want to be a player, then yes you have reason to be disappointed. But if all you want is a girlfriend/wife, there is still hope.

This forum is so much focused on looks that people seemed to believe that looks are everything. It is simply not true. In some situations looks may be everything, for example if you are trying to pick up a women in bar. But looks are not enough for a lasting happy relationship. It takes a lot more than looks. Yesterday, a classmate of mine posted pics of his family on Facebook. He was NW5 in college. He was of average height and face. He started dating this good looking women back then. It’s been over eight years and they are still happily married. They have a child now. I was NW2 when I started dating my ex-wife. She is a really nice women but still my relationship only lasted 3 years. So there is this NW5 guy who is happily married for over eight years and I, the NW2, couldn’t even get past three. My classmates wife and my ex-wife are on the same level look wise. So what does that tell you? There are far too many variables when it comes to a relationship. Looks are very important, but so are other things. It’s important to pay attention to other important things as well if you want to be happy in a relationship and life. I am concerned that people on this forum are so focused on looks, they will be in for a disappointment if and when they get married. This extreme negativity is only going to hurt you. And please don't tell me, "Oh you are not completely bald so you wouldn't know how tough it is for a bald man to get a women". Of course I don't know what it feels like to be completely bald. But I have eyes and I can see that there are plenty of bald or short guys who are happily married. No matter what you say, you CAN'T change this fact.

Good post but ultimately futile on here.

As you've probably seen on this forum, there are a few posters who reject any ounce of positivity and one in particular who seems to have made it his life mission to post on forums with the same post every time with the phrase "it's only looks". There are probably quite a few here that have some form of mental illness and some who actually want to project that unhappiness that they feel onto others. It spoils what should be a fairly supportive place really.

And yes, I walked around my local park the other day and one of the hottest girls I've seen in a long time (wearing a crop top with flat stomach, hot pants etc) was holding hands lovingly with an older guy with a grown out NW5. But I saw many attractive girls with guys less 'good looking' and vice versa. Believe it or not, people value different things and not everyone looks for their partner online or in a nightclub.

 

[Hairon]

Good post but ultimately futile on here.

As you've probably seen on this forum, there are a few posters who reject any ounce of positivity and one in particular who seems to have made it his life mission to post on forums with the same post every time with the phrase "it's only looks". There are probably quite a few here that have some form of mental illness and some who actually want to project that unhappiness that they feel onto others. It spoils what should be a fairly supportive place really.

And yes, I walked around my local park the other day and one of the hottest girls I've seen in a long time (wearing a crop top with flat stomach, hot pants etc) was holding hands lovingly with an older guy with a grown out NW5. But I saw many attractive girls with guys less 'good looking' and vice versa. Believe it or not, people value different things and not everyone looks for their partner online or in a nightclub.

people here will tell you that all those guys you see holding hands with hot girls are getting cheated on by them with studs behind their backs or they are only with them because of money or status.
that will be the only explanation people have here for such couples.

As jd_uk says, this forum is a dark place, don't try to shed some light on it, you will fail every single time, if you don't want to get dragged down a gloomy depressing path simply do not visit this forum.

 

[Agustin Araujo]

Hair loss effects everyone differently. Depending on the person, some will freak out over the most minuscule hairline recession while some like myself just keep on living life despite all the hair follicles on the entire top being under attack in a large pattern. I find this place more therapeutic than it is depressing, I've learned plenty from here. I wasn't very aware of all the different variations of hair loss that exists until I joined the place.

 

[Hairon]

Hair loss effects everyone differently. Depending on the person, some will freak out over the most minuscule hairline recession while some like myself just keep on living life despite all the hair follicles on the entire top being under attack in a large pattern. I find this place more therapeutic than it is depressing, I've learned plenty from here. I wasn't very aware of all the different variations of hair loss that exists until I joined the place.

I don't know what sections of the forum you browse but the "the impact of hair loss" section is a very very dark room with no chance of light.

 

[pjhair]

pjhair, you made an excellent post, and a totally valid one. I will admit and have admitted before that I've never had a girlfriend. And about getting a decent looking one, I don't know about that happening. I suffer from a disability called Asperger's Syndrome and has impacted my life very negatively. For me, it's been a much bigger problem than going bald at a young age and considering ASD impacts my daily function.

Yes, bald and balding men can be with women, there's absolutely no doubt that hair loss hurts your chances but it's possible. The thing is some individuals are not the most attractive ones around even when they have a full head of hair and hardly/never feel good about themselves. Then hair loss occurs, they feel crippled, and becomes a burden that's too great to overcome. Not many things in life is a one size fits all solution, and overcoming hair loss certainly isn't one of them.

I am really sorry to hear about your struggles. I agree with you, not many things in life is a one size fits all solution.

 

[shookwun]

Bald guys can get girlfriends, but the quality is nothing to be proud of. I have a guy in particular who always comes in mind - very handsome face, classical type of masculine look with a big jaw, strong, sharp eyes and over all someone that would turn heads. Tall, and a good physique yet hes dating a plain jane with a pancake ***. Once his hat comes off he becomes average at best with his NW5. This is a former good looking guy that is still reasonable looking.

As a bald guy you will never slay, and pick up. I dont care how confident you think you are...... I frequently bump into balding dudes and advanced baldites, and none of them even go to clubs, and bars anymore. A lot of these guys are trying to LTR the first piece that comes or there way. Or as a mother would say, better put a ring on it before its to late...? Your mothers wernt kidding when they said this.


I always get a lol out of people posting Fredrik Ljungberg. Almost as famous as women saying just look like Bruce willis and its okay!

I am not even trying to be a dick but, as a bald guy its extremely hard to be considered attractive, and handsome. As most would say .. you managed to pull the look off. this doesn't consisute someone as handsome rather ... working with what they got/average.




Do not even try to counter this post if you are a NW3, and under. delluded... as I once was when I started balding. I remember 5 years ago coming on this forum telling people they need to just be more ambitions, confident and work with what they got.


As UCMAN once said. "a women can't run her fingers through your confidence. COnfidence doesn't frame your face'

 

[pjhair]

Good post but ultimately futile on here.

But I saw many attractive girls with guys less 'good looking' and vice versa. Believe it or not, people value different things and not everyone looks for their partner online or in a nightclub.

That is usually my observation as well, whenever I go out.

 

[buckthorn]

I am 5'8" and the way I am rapidly losing hair and the fact that NO treatments work for me, assures me I will have to shave to zero by the end of the year. When I do, I will lock down a hottie and post one final pic on this forum of her sweeeeeeet a*s. haha unk:

 

[Agustin Araujo]

I don't know what sections of the forum you browse but the "the impact of hair loss" section is a very very dark room with no chance of light.

I enjoy browsing the Success Stories and Research section.

Yes you're right, the Impact section certainly isn't the happiest place on this forum. It's a place for venting frustrations.

I am really sorry to hear about your struggles. I agree with you, not many things in life is a one size fits all solution.

No worries pjhair! I'm doing much better now than I was a couple of year ago, including my hair. Hopefully I keep having continued progress!

 

[Hairon]

Bald guys can get girlfriends, but the quality is nothing to be proud of. I have a guy in particular who always comes in mind - very handsome face, classical type of masculine look with a big jaw, strong, sharp eyes and over all someone that would turn heads. Tall, and a good physique yet hes dating a plain jane with a pancake ***. Once his hat comes off he becomes average at best with his NW5. This is a former good looking guy that is still reasonable looking.

As a bald guy you will never slay, and pick up. I dont care how confident you think you are...... I frequently bump into balding dudes and advanced baldites, and none of them even go to clubs, and bars anymore. A lot of these guys are trying to LTR the first piece that comes or there way. Or as a mother would say, better put a ring on it before its to late...? Your mothers wernt kidding when they said this.


I always get a lol out of people posting Fredrik Ljungberg. Almost as famous as women saying just look like Bruce willis and its okay!

I am not even trying to be a dick but, as a bald guy its extremely hard to be considered attractive, and handsome. As most would say .. you managed to pull the look off. this doesn't consisute someone as handsome rather ... working with what they got/average.




Do not even try to counter this post if you are a NW3, and under. delluded... as I once was when I started balding. I remember 5 years ago coming on this forum telling people they need to just be more ambitions, confident and work with what they got.


As UCMAN once said. "a women can't run her fingers through your confidence. COnfidence doesn't frame your face'

well, it's only fair, we wouldn't date or be with a balding/bald women, why would they be with balding/bald men?
and yeah, people can't expect to be with a spouse that is out of their league, that's the way the world works, it works like that both for men and women though, an average woman will never be able to date or be with a hot guy, and even if she does get to be, it will not last for a long time, same goes for men, it's only fair.
people can only date their match.

 

[shookwun]

Make sure you put a ring on it right away. your mother wasn't kidding when she said that.
























In all seriousness. Don't ever get married unless it is concrete in your favor. preferably with a women who is educated & makes good money, and isn't 'mommie'. Because being a mom isn't a an occupation.


It seems I can never find a women who is both educated, and make good money. Pretty ones become waitresses, and the ugly ones work at grocery stores :santa:

 

[pjhair]

Do not even try to counter this post if you are a NW3, and under. delluded... as I once was when I started balding. I remember 5 years ago coming on this forum telling people they need to just be more ambitions, confident and work with what they got.

Your argument is invalid. That fact that you FEEL that bald guys have no shot at getting decent looking women doesn't negate the fact that there ARE bald guys with decent looking women. Your Norwood status is as irrelevant to this argument as is your opinion. Nothing you say can change this fact.

 

[shookwun]

What is your Norwood?

Do you have a girlfriend?

Are you subjectively handsome? (Do women message, and match up with you frequently on dating applications. Do women frquentely call you handsome in real life?) It's not hard to know if you are good looking.


This may be the deciding factor in your relevance. (be honest)

 

[Hairon]

Your argument is invalid. That fact that you FEEL that bald guys have no shot at getting decent looking women doesn't negate the fact that there ARE bald guys with decent looking women. Your Norwood status is as irrelevant to this argument as is your opinion. Nothing you say can change this fact.

you don't understand though, those bald guys with decent looking women are getting cheated on by them as we speak, or they are rich, or they have status, those decent looking women aren't really attracted to them