I Had An Epiphany. Confidence Does Matter, A Lot!

[samantha3333]

And you most likely fucked that guys head up by just walking out on him. Think of the further damage you're doing.

Yeah I realised that guy must've felt bad to some extent. He was very attractive but i do feel uncomfortable being approached in public

 

[samantha3333]

I think to generalise, hot girls who have a problem holding any sort of eye contact or admitting interest in a guy, are subconsciously more picky than they realise. This may be you, as I've seen it with plenty of girls when you really get to the crux of their issues.

However if you were in an abusive relationship you may be somewhat scarred, this may not be permanent but I've also seen this, girls have an incredibly hard time trusting any man, hot or not, they see the potential for any person to be abusive. It's hard to shake that, but maybe the club dating stranger scene is not the place for you to be thinking of finding someone.

And where to find someone then? Well, ideally within a circle of friends, so that may take patience to find an appropriate guy. But if my suspicions that it's down to an abusive relationship are correct, then you need to find someone who knows they need to be patient with you in all ways, because that trust won't come easily.

But as you know, it's certainly not normal that if you want to find a guy, you keep brushing them off. I'm sure you must feel attracted to some of these guys, but either on some level you feel you're too good for them (and I'm not criticising here, we can't help our base instincts) or you feel you can't trust them, every guy is "not right" for some reason you can't put your finger on.

Were you always like this, before the abusive relationship?

My standards are not high at all. I just have specific standards (just above average height and look are ok. Preferably in the same / similar industry and have similar hobbies because sickeningly that is how my last relationship was and I can't imagine dating other types of guys.

I have been always shy around guys but it's been more sereve. Ironically I'm actually more comfortable with how I look but i just always have the imagine of how inadequate i look in the eyes of these good looking guys. In a way, I envy them.

 

[kj6723]

(just above average height

Ok, can I ask a question here just for the chicks, since us dudes here have overtalked this concept plenty. Am I basically fucked at 5'6" even if I have everything else basically together aesthetically?

Honestly never overthought my height too much before coming on this forum

 

[samantha3333]

Ok, can I ask a question here just for the chicks, since us dudes here have overtalked this concept plenty. Am I basically fucked at 5'6" even if I have everything else basically together aesthetically?

Honestly never overthought my height too much before coming on this forum

No, I know a lot of chicks who prefer guys that aren't that tall. Friend is 5'8 and dating a 5'7 dude

 

[Rudiger]

Ok, can I ask a question here just for the chicks, since us dudes here have overtalked this concept plenty. Am I basically fucked at 5'6" even if I have everything else basically together aesthetically?

Honestly never overthought my height too much before coming on this forum

Nope you just need to find a short chick, which there are plenty of. To be honest even a lot of 5'6 girls won't consider a guy their own height, but there's still so many hot women that are 5'0 to 5'4, that's where you need to aim realistically.

Of course there's still the hypergamy queens who are 5'1 and feel it's somehow justified to exclusively go for guys that are 6'5, as if it makes any f*****g sense.

How much is it in cm?

Really? But it's 167cm. Google is your friend.

 

[SmoothSailing]

How much is it in cm?

168cm.

 

[samantha3333]

I am gonna try an explanation here... you tell me what you think. Don't you feel like the attention you are getting is not legit? Because that is what happens to me all because of hair loss. If a guy says I am pretty or gives me any attention, I just back of if it is too real because I feel like it's not "real", it is not the "truth", what you see is a girl with toppik but in reality I am this woman with a lack of hair...
Sometimes, if I get a compliment, I am frustrated and just don't answer anything; people take that for condescencion (which I can also be), but really it is just sadness and the constant impression being some kind of fraud...

I don't think like that. I just thought "guys always say that" "guys always stare". In my own time, I can feel like the hottest thing In the world. When I'm out and about, I just feel insecure, inadequate. I guess I'm just only comfortable in my own shell.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Ok, can I ask a question here just for the chicks, since us dudes here have overtalked this concept plenty. Am I basically fucked at 5'6" even if I have everything else basically together aesthetically?

Honestly never overthought my height too much before coming on this forum

Why don't you go to your cities high street or mall and note all the short men who still have GFs.

(Written from a 6'0 guy)

 

[Rudiger]

Why don't you go to your cities high street or mall and note all the short men who still have GFs.

(Written from a 6'0 guy)

Uh, huh?

 

[SmoothSailing]

Ok, can I ask a question here just for the chicks, since us dudes here have overtalked this concept plenty. Am I basically fucked at 5'6" even if I have everything else basically together aesthetically?

Honestly never overthought my height too much before coming on this forum

It's a lot harder for you because many girls will rule you out. But this doesn't mean you can't get cute/hot girls if you're attractive. You just have to find short girls who aren't mad about height. I know a 5'7 guy who is very attractive and goes on tinder dates with cute girls every week. I've even seen him picking up girls at clubs. Although I feel short in clubs at 5'9.

 

[samantha3333]

Nope you just need to find a short chick, which there are plenty of. To be honest even a lot of 5'6 girls won't consider a guy their own height, but there's still so many hot women that are 5'0 to 5'4, that's where you need to aim realistically.

Of course there's still the hypergamy queens who are 5'1 and feel it's somehow justified to exclusively go for guys that are 6'5, as if it makes any f*****g sense.



Really? But it's 167cm. Google is your friend.

But please bear in mind, average height in U.K. (And can apply to other countries) of adult women is 5'3 whereas adult male 5'10. So it's really not a big ask if a 5'3 girl wants to date a 5'10 guy or even 6'. I'm 5'2 myself but I prefer 5'10 to 6'. And I've always dated 5'10+. I feel no shame. I actually hate it when people think just because I'm short I should go for short guys. They completely overlook the fact that average women ARE short.

 

[CopeForLife]

I just had an inner dialogue with an imagined young female who cracked an imagined joke about baldness.

I tried to explain myself (her), to allegedly non-sufferer, what is like to have a diffused MBP (classic Androgenetic Alopecia is a day walk I can say from experience in comparing) but I failed...

Eventually, I concluded it's just impossible to share a mental pain during this process. Impossible to share a hard decision you need to make – take a finasteride – a drug that can destroy you as a male – a f*****g irony. Why the f*** on the Earth will sacrifice a libido to a follicles, huh? Let alone this drug likely will not regrow your hair or will not work at all.

Just hair brah shave confidence

 

[g.i joey]

Ok, can I ask a question here just for the chicks, since us dudes here have overtalked this concept plenty. Am I basically fucked at 5'6" even if I have everything else basically together aesthetically?

Honestly never overthought my height too much before coming on this forum

I dont think you're fucked at all. i have a friend whos 5'5 and gets called short very often (low confidence, bad posture, etc, alot of beta attributes) and then i have a freind whos like between 5'6 and 5'7, smashes very often, super aesthetic, high confidence. Its really how you carry yourself, but you cant start going all napoleon complex on people.

But there are some ground rules, dont go for girls that are more than an inch or 2 taller than you. Most girls want a guy whos just a tiny bit taller than them when they have their heels on. source: 2 girls i dated told me this.

 

[samantha3333]

I just had an inner dialogue with an imagined young female who cracked an imagined joke about baldness.

Just hair brah shave confidence

This is irresponsibility. Not confidence. If you hate being bald, ;don't be bald.

 

[SmoothSailing]

But please bear in mind, average height in U.K. (And can apply to other countries) of adult women is 5'3 whereas adult male 5'10. So it's really not a big ask if a 5'3 girl wants to date a 5'10 guy or even 6'. I'm 5'2 myself but I prefer 5'10 to 6'. And I've always dated 5'10+. I feel no shame. I actually hate it when people think just because I'm short I should go for short guys. They completely overlook the fact that average women ARE short.

So, I believe, all 4 girls on this forum would rule me out simply because of my height (5'9). Kind of sucks.

 

[Rudiger]

But please bear in mind, average height in U.K. (And can apply to other countries) of adult women is 5'3 whereas adult male 5'10. So it's really not a big ask if a 5'3 girl wants to date a 5'10 guy or even 6'. I'm 5'2 myself but I prefer 5'10 to 6'. And I've always dated 5'10+. I feel no shame. I actually hate it when people think just because I'm short I should go for short guys. They completely overlook the fact that average women ARE short.

It's a fair point but I mean, for f*** sake, why would anyone need such a specific tick list? Would you really be put off by a guy who's "only" 4 inches taller than you?

I mean we're all free to do what we want so work away, but I find it ridiculous to limit your options like that. I'm probably way more picky than most guys (when it comes to finding an actual relationship at least) but I couldn't give a sh*t about height, 5'0 to 5'8 all good) hair colour, race, etc. just someone attractive. I don't want to limit my possibilities by getting a tick list in my head.

I can understand a girl who ends up being with a taller guy, that's fine if that's how things work out, but by "hypergamy queens" I mean those women who limit themselves to "tall" guys meaning 6'1 and under need not apply, even if the girl is in fact short- that is ludicrous.

 

[CopeForLife]

So, I believe, all 4 girls on this forum would rule me out simply because of my height (5'9). Kind of sucks.

Once in life I met a guy who was I don't know 5'2...

He was 9/10 but shrinked...

Low bf, narrow hips and wide shoulders (relatively). Beard, face, hair. Thick and dark.

Looked amazing and alpha as f***.

But it is like 1/10000 of manlets, sorry.

 

[samantha3333]

It's a fair point but I mean, for f*** sake, why would anyone need such a specific tick list? Would you really be put off by a guy who's "only" 4 inches taller than you?

I mean we're all free to do what we want so work away, but I find it ridiculous to limit your options like that. I'm probably way more picky than most guys (when it comes to finding an actual relationship at least) but I couldn't give a sh*t about height, 5'0 to 5'8 all good) hair colour, race, etc. just someone attractive. I don't want to limit my possibilities by getting a tick list in my head.

I can understand a girl who ends up being with a taller guy, that's fine is that's how things work out, but by "hypergamy queens" I mean those women who limit themselves to "tall" guys meaning 6'1 and under need not apply, even if the girl is in fact short- that is ludicrous.

i have never met a 5 girl who only dates 6'+ but I'm a girl that loves a guy a foot taller but I wouldn't limit myself. Still I wouldn't go for guys under average height. Believe me I've tried. I'm just not attracted to them. And limiting myself to guys of average height really isn't limiting my dating pool. In fact I got hit on by tall guys more. Tall guys love short girls too so it's really not just the girls who're making things imbalanced here (I.e. Taking all the tall guys and leave no one to the tall girls).

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

It's a fair point but I mean, for f*** sake, why would anyone need such a specific tick list? Would you really be put off by a guy who's "only" 4 inches taller than you?

I mean we're all free to do what we want so work away, but I find it ridiculous to limit your options like that. I'm probably way more picky than most guys (when it comes to finding an actual relationship at least) but I couldn't give a sh*t about height, 5'0 to 5'8 all good) hair colour, race, etc. just someone attractive. I don't want to limit my possibilities by getting a tick list in my head.

I can understand a girl who ends up being with a taller guy, that's fine if that's how things work out, but by "hypergamy queens" I mean those women who limit themselves to "tall" guys meaning 6'1 and under need not apply, even if the girl is in fact short- that is ludicrous.

To be honest, 5'0 is stretching it for me.

Aren't you going to get neck problems from kissing them?

Can you have sex standing up?

 

[JohnsonDDG]

So, I believe, all 4 girls on this forum would rule me out simply because of my height (5'9). Kind of sucks.

Tom Hardy is 5'9.

Its not about the height.