If All You Know Comes From Psl And Manosphere Blogs...

[Rudiger]

XANDERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

XANDER

f*** you get ignored something fierce around here.

 

[DoctorHouse]

It's more complex than that in my experience. Some guys don't photograph well or they're not unique enough to attract attention. The sheer volume of people available on a dating app for a big city means that the ones with the most luck are those who "stick out" in some way.

I once lived with a conventionally cute, good-looking guy, around a 7-8. He got laid a lot by going to parties and bartending, hooking up with girls he had met once or twice before, or was around socially. He had an extended social circle and they were all casually doing each other in this way, for a week, a month or two at a time.

On tinder however it was ghost town for him. Few matches, flaky dates, no luck at all. I absolutely dominated him.

I agree about the not photographing well. When I did online dating, most of the first reactions I got without solicitation was that I look so much better in person. Of course, that made it harder for me to want to post photos. People who photograph well have a great advantage on online dating sites. I mostly got hits on online dating from older women.

 

[Xander94]

If you use the method @JohnsonDDG and I used (spamming the f*** out of dating apps) and get 0 returns, you're not going to do any better in real life.

Value always gets noticed in one way or another. If 1000 girls online think your looks don't make the cut, the girls in real life are going to think the same

So I did that for 1 year 0 results means Im out right ?

 

[Xander94]

No match, no reply, no discussion at all?

Few matches like 3 per month. I had like 3 conversations then unmatched

 

[Xander94]

Oh god, from what you write on here, I can only imagine what you're telling them.

3 matches per month that arent replying/

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

What's your first message?

I think that he doesn't speak the local language where he lives.

 

[Xander94]

What's your first message?

some funny gif

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

It's more complex than that in my experience. Some guys don't photograph well or they're not unique enough to attract attention. The sheer volume of people available on a dating app for a big city means that the ones with the most luck are those who "stick out" in some way.

I once lived with a conventionally cute, good-looking guy, around a 7-8. He got laid a lot by going to parties and bartending, hooking up with girls he had met once or twice before, or was around socially. He had an extended social circle and they were all casually doing each other in this way, for a week, a month or two at a time.

On tinder however it was ghost town for him. Few matches, flaky dates, no luck at all. I absolutely dominated him.

For reasons I'm unsure about I get more matches in really big cities. I can go to new York LA or Washington and get several dozen matches in an hour, and they do talk back when I try talking to them.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

some funny gif

Try,

"Hey Emma, how are you?"

In the local language.

You can occasionally send a personal message for kicks.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

If you use the method @JohnsonDDG and I used (spamming the f*** out of dating apps) and get 0 returns, you're not going to do any better in real life.

.

Haha this is exactly what I used to do get laid. Everyday I spent about two hours on dating sites, either swiping or chatting to women. I'd go on dates with women I wasn't even that fussed about just so I could get more experience with the opposite sex. In a way it really paid off because when I look back I had a ton of crazy experiences and lots of happy memories.[/

 

[Dante92]

What's your first message?

Something like "RIP LDAR b**ch"

 

[pjhair]

It's more complex than that in my experience. Some guys don't photograph well or they're not unique enough to attract attention. The sheer volume of people available on a dating app for a big city means that the ones with the most luck are those who "stick out" in some way.

I once lived with a conventionally cute, good-looking guy, around a 7-8. He got laid a lot by going to parties and bartending, hooking up with girls he had met once or twice before, or was around socially. He had an extended social circle and they were all casually doing each other in this way, for a week, a month or two at a time.

On tinder however it was ghost town for him. Few matches, flaky dates, no luck at all. I absolutely dominated him.

I totally agree with this. Trying to gauge an individuals real life successes in dating from his online success is not always accurate. There are far too many variables to consider. I sometimes worry that young people with no dating experience will give up before even trying after their failure on Tinder.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

I totally agree with this. Trying to gauge an individuals real life successes in dating from his online success is not always accurate. There are far too many variables to consider. I sometimes worry that young people with no dating experience will give up before even trying after their failure on Tinder.

Yep, I've got a friend who is a genuine 8 and he actually has women approach him in bars and in shops - its a sight to behold. And yet when he tried online dating he couldn't do it because he wouldn't put any effort into messaging and he struggled to close dates for whatever reason. The guy gets laid pretty often but its pretty much from people he works with or people he meets on a night out.

Me on the other hand - I've never been approached in a bar or on the street and I've never hooked up with anyone from work. But when I go onto online dating then I soak up the women (albeit average looking ones) without any problems.

Anyway, the point is that for whatever reason some people do better online and some do better in bars - so all you can do is try your best at both and see what is most cost/effort effective in relation to your results.

 

[pjhair]

Yep, I've got a friend who is a genuine 8 and he actually has women approach him in bars and in shops - its a sight to behold. And yet when he tried online dating he couldn't do it because he wouldn't put any effort into messaging and he struggled to close dates for whatever reason. The guy gets laid pretty often but its pretty much from people he works with or people he meets on a night out.

Me on the other hand - I've never been approached in a bar or on the street and I've never hooked up with anyone from work. But when I go onto online dating then I soak up the women (albeit average looking ones) without any problems.

Anyway, the point is that for whatever reason some people do better online and some do better in bars - so all you can do is try your best at both and see what is most cost/effort effective in relation to your results.

My own experience is somewhat similar to your friend . Online dating has been a failure for me whereas I have dated some really good looking women who I met in college/work or through my friends. During everyday interactions we sometimes do feel attraction towards people who we would have normally rejected on Tinder. Happened to me a few days ago. I felt attracted towards a women I would never have thought is my type. Online dating is just a picture game without a person attached to it. Factors like physical presence, touch (even non-sexual ones like hand shake), body language, smell, voice, eye contact etc are removed. These factors combined with meeting a certain look threshold can and do turn a no to yes.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

My own experience is somewhat similar to your friend . Online dating has been a failure for me whereas I have dated some really good looking women who I met in college/work or through my friends. During everyday interactions we sometimes do feel attraction towards people who we would have normally rejected on Tinder. Happened to me a few days ago. I felt attracted towards a women I would never have thought is my type. Online dating is just a picture game without a person attached to it. Factors like physical presence, touch (even non-sexual ones like hand shake), body language, smell, voice, eye contact etc are removed. These factors combined with meeting a certain look threshold can and do turn a no to yes.

I know why I suck in real life:

1. Because I struggle to sense cues to tell me if they fancy me

2. Because I'm scared of rejection from people I see in real life.

The benefits for online dating to me are:

1. I'm good at putting the hours in to talking to people online and having conversations over messages.

2. Because I know if they agree to meet me then they like me and its not really a risk to make a move because I already know they think I'm attractive.

 

[Xander94]

Try,

"Hey Emma, how are you?"

In the local language.

You can occasionally send a personal message for kicks.

Tried that didnt work

 

[pjhair]

I know why I suck in real life:

1. Because I struggle to sense cues to tell me if they fancy me

2. Because I'm scared of rejection from people I see in real life.

You are not alone. A lot of us men suffer from these two weaknesses . It's so hard to understand what women really want. They don't always communicate very clearly.

 

[hairblues]

I know why I suck in real life:

1. Because I struggle to sense cues to tell me if they fancy me

2. Because I'm scared of rejection from people I see in real life.

The benefits for online dating to me are:

1. I'm good at putting the hours in to talking to people online and having conversations over messages.

2. Because I know if they agree to meet me then they like me and its not really a risk to make a move because I already know they think I'm attractive.

If you want to change it you have to embrace the idea that being rejected is not a big deal.

It might actually be a good exercise for you if this is something you struggle with.

its approval..you want guaranteed approval...that can bleed into many areas of your life beyond men/women..so it might be worth trying to embrace the idea of rejection.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

If you want to change it you have to embrace the idea that being rejected is not a big deal.

It might actually be a good exercise for you if this is something you struggle with.

its approval..you want guaranteed approval...that can bleed into many areas of your life beyond men/women..so it might be worth trying to embrace the idea of rejection.

Do you embrace rejection? Honestly, when did you last ask a man out?

I once asked a woman out from work when I was 16 and she just flat out said no without an excuse or apology and it pretty much crushed me. I know some men are cocky or don't have feelings, but I do :/

 

[tomcat]

Do you embrace rejection? Honestly, when did you last ask a man out?

I once asked a woman out from work when I was 16 and she just flat out said no without an excuse or apology and it pretty much crushed me. I know some men are cocky or don't have feelings, but I do :/

first rejection in my life was f*****g hard i remember got back home and thinking about that embracing moment in shower like 20 minutes