If All You Know Comes From Psl And Manosphere Blogs...

[Dench57]

I have not tried to pick up a woman in a bar in over ten years. I don't even know what bar I would go to.

a titty bar

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

That almost never happens in Belgium, not culturally acceptable here.

But I know it is considered normal in the UK.

Or in the US, my friends and I were always baffled at those girls sitting by themselves at the bar in TV shows like How I Met Your Mother.

If a girl is sitting alone in a bar in Belgium, it's highly likely she's a prostitute.

Come on man the TV show isn't f*****g real.

They're selling an idealistic fantasy that only idiots might believe.

For example, it's standard on those TV shows for beautiful women to have nobody available. They might go for the first nice guy that comes along.

Sorry, no.

Just FYI, human nature is the same across both sides of the Atlantic, and maybe even the Pacific too.

 

[Medina]

She has decided if you were worth her time before you even open your mouth.

Damn, with the number of girls who randomly chat with me, I must be a Chad.

The truth is, for people with experience, women like to be social, I go to events where girls will hit you up because they're uncomfortable to just be standing there. It feels so awkward to them, so they take the first guy, and that could even be @Dante92 , and they start a conversation.

Lol at thinking that necessarily means she's sexually interested in you. All I see here is a lack of experience and misplaced erotomania.

If a woman finds you sexually attractive, she's going to giggle at what you say, unless you're a complete autistic moron who asks her the color of her panties, and @Rudiger doesn't strike me as that kind of guy at all.

I know what you mean about women laughing at jokes that aren't funny, but if the jokes come across as awkward, unwarranted or fail to convey basic social skills... You WILL be rejected.

And btw @Rudiger we've all been through embarrassing sh*t and if people say otherwise they are lying.

 

[Dench57]

I've seen this in a lot of TV shows and American movies, and you're telling me it's a lie?

Don't tell me I can't even trust The Wire anymore .

lol i fuckin loved this moment. I need to watch that show again, so much sh*t you miss the first time round, layers upon layers

 

[hairblues]

She has decided if you were worth her time before you even open your mouth.
ll.

Worth her time does not equal already decided if she wants to f*** you or does not want to f*** you..Just means 'maybe' lets see what he is about. How optimistic of a maybe this depends on appeal of looks/appearance of course to her taste and standards.

 

[hairblues]

I know what you mean about women laughing at jokes that aren't funny, but if the jokes come across as awkward, unwarranted or fail to convey basic social skills... You WILL be rejected.

And btw @Rudiger we've all been through embarrassing sh*t and if people say otherwise they are lying.

yeah but some people are just nervous laughers when uncomfortable.
Ever go to a funeral or a wake with someone or a wedding and they giggle at the most awkward time?
It's a problem some people have.
MY grandmother was like this..its not really 'laughing' I don't know what it is. Nerves i guess.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

So women don't go alone at the bar to sip a cocktail while waiting for men to buy her a drink is not real.

I've seen this in a lot of TV shows and American movies, and you're telling me it's a lie?

Don't tell me I can't even trust The Wire anymore .

It might happen occasionally, but for the most part when I go out I see people in groups.

But maybe I'm mistaken. I don't have a lot of experience.

I do think that beautiful women are too easily available on TV though. They're just single and waiting for a decent guy to come along.

You know what we have not seen on TV or film? A beautiful woman with hundreds of men to choose from. I've never seen that. Why not?

 

[Medina]

You would have been rejected by the girl in question no matter what you would have said and done.

To get laid, you're not passing a f*****g exam, she feels that she wants you to f*** her, or she doesn't.

It doesn't make sense and again, I can't believe I still have to point this out, if you want to know absurd this sounds:

Reverse the genders!

Would you turn down a girl you want to have sex with because she makes a couple of unfunny jokes and she's behaving weird?

We all know the answer to that question. Are you going to tell me that it's different for girls? Is this where we're still at?

If you want to have sex wit someone, it's not a rational decision. It occurs in the most primal, reptilian part of your brain.

If a girl wants you and everything falls into place, she will have sex with you no matter how awkward and unfunny you are.

And please no strawman, no "what if I tell her that I like to skin kittens for a hobby?!"

You are so wrong it's almost funny

So no guy in the entire world has ever fucked it up with a girl who showed interest in him?
And no girl has ever in the world changed her mind about a guy?

Give me a break dude

 

[Dench57]

You are so wrong it's almost funny

So no guy in the entire world has ever fucked it up with a girl who showed interest in him?
And no girl has ever in the world changed her mind about a guy?

Give me a break dude

god damn it dude

FredPill™ essay incoming

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

WhitePolarBear vs Medina,

 

[hairblues]

That's the difference with Belgium, a woman just doesn't go to a bar on her own.

She (and everyone else) would think it's weird.

Occasionally is already a lot more than never.

I am not sure how you are meaning it...

BUT yes you will see men or women by themselves at some restaurants or bars lounges etc.

I bartended in college and I worked at a real old fashioned, pub style 'bar' (Guinness, black and Tan or scotch neat anyone) at one point near a court house in Brooklyn...it was very common for people to come in by themselves and have a drink or order lunch at the bar. Both men and women. It was also very common to see hook ups happen randomly after a few were tossed back. You get regulars who are feeling secure to come in a lone because they know the bartender or the waiter/waitress. I have been on opposite end going to certain spots I know the people who work there so it's not awkward to go alone..Also NY it is very common to go eat, have coffee, (I'm not a big alcohol drinker so not me..) or go have a cocktail by yourself.

It's 'locational' to be honest. If something is downstairs from where you live or next to where you work--it's comfortable to go do this.

It's not going to be like "Looking for Mr Goodbar" (I'm dating myself now lol) unless you are in like a trashy area and she is a semi-alcoholic divorced mother of 4.

In some 'hoods and some specific places it is common for some women to get dolled up and go by themselves to try and meet men. This is not my MO to be honest as I think this is like a predator kind of thing and it's having an agenda to meet a 'specific' type of man. (money money money).
The opposite is now true as well, young men will go try and pick up UES mature ladies who like to do lunch.

 

[Rudiger]

If she was really interested in you, and sexually attracted to you, she would have laughed at your lame jokes and forgiven your shyness.

Actually she did- for several minutes. While touching my arm constantly and leaning in a lot to talk. Of course when these signals stopped is when I decided to cut my losses.

Did you think she intentionally walked away from her friends, approached me,initiated and led chat, but she was all stony face and didn't act remotely friendly? In that case I'd just think she was out of her mind. She had a big smile from the start and laughed at things that weren't even jokes, until she realised I was being quite boring. Not even autist-boring, just, stranger chit-chat boring.

Sorry I didn't mention this initially and it led to you making an incorrect assumption.

 

[CaptainForehead]

, I just love the sound of my own voice

You b**ch!!!

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

So it is real. I knew these depictions in all those TV shows and movies couldn't all be BS.

I sometimes go eat at the restaurant by myself, but I never tell anyone, because I know what the reaction would be: "Weird!".

 

[CaptainForehead]

View attachment 55854

I'd rather eat alone. Food something I still enjoy. I like to focus on food while I'm eating and not trying to focus on a conversation. No music, no tv. Just food.

 

[hairblues]

So it is real. I knew these depictions in all those TV shows and movies couldn't all be BS.

I sometimes go eat at the restaurant by myself, but I never tell anyone, because I know what the reaction would be: "Weird!".

No its very common in manhattan and parts of brooklyn.

Its actually kind of nice to be honest.

I go to some social things by myself and just meet people and have random conversations.

I used to go to a small theater often near where I live by myself to see these artsy kind of shows and just randomly have conversations with people..books stores (they are disappearing) also its normal to strike up conversations, art shows, galleries museums.

BUT when I lived in Miami it was different. Not as much people by themselves...I think down in South Beach now its probably a bit more like this to be able to go places as a regular by yourself--not sure though only gone there now as a vacationer..(when I lived in Miami 's.beach' was like a slum with just a few nightclubs--when i go back over the years its changed a lot obviously).
Other parts of Miami are kind of 'spread out' it's almost suburban in my opinion as opposed to a 'city' like NYC.
You drive everywhere for example if you are not living in certain areas. You definitely need a car living in Miami.

We have this cool thing in NY called 'Drink and drawers' where you bring your own booze--you pay like $10-$30 bucks depending where, bring your sketch pad and pencils and draw nude figure models all night..They are 9 out of 10 times lovely looking women posing.
I consider this the 'hipster' version of a 'tit bar'

 

[Dench57]

I'd rather eat alone. Food something I still enjoy. I like to focus on food while I'm eating and not trying to focus on a conversation. No music, no tv. Just food.

I'm like this in restaurants when I go out to eat in a group. You won't hear a peep from me when the food arrives, while other people continue to talk I'm usually stuffing my face until it's gone.

Food > conversation

 

[Rudiger]

This is my Fredpill analysis about all this:

If a woman loses sexual interest in you just because you're a bit boring, she was never that interested in you in the first place.

You know how they say "be careful what you wish for"? To me, this is one of those cases.

Even if you kept her interested at that particular moment, your bond with her would have remained extremely fragile.

This is a "I'm changing my mind at the last minute!" bound to happen.

You could arrive at her place, make out in the bed, and out of nowhere, she could be like "I'm sorry, I don't know about this. We should stop."

Worse, she could have become your girlfriend, and the second you're not super interesting or living up to the standards that she had set in that first interaction, she'd leave you or start resenting you.

And this is always going to happen in any long-term relationship, you can't be on top of your game (!!) at all times. There will be moments where you're tired, a bit cranky, saying some boring BS, and it's OK... If your girlfriend is very attracted to you.

Which she was from the beginning, even if you weren't on top of your game the night you met her.

My girlfriend still laughs about the fact that I was all red and acting a bit shy when I kissed her (this is not how I remember it ), and look where we are today, one year together.

I know this sounds like a cope, but that girl (supposedly) losing interest because you were boring and awkward was a blessing in disguise.

If a girl approaches a guy and starts openly flirting in front of everyone, she is very attracted to you. You've given examples before of girls chatting to you in a friendly way, I don't see the relevance here. You assumed it was just friendly chit chat because she was bored, you then find out it clearly wasn't, and now somehow still insist she wasn't attracted anyway.

I guess after several minutes maybe she looked at my face she's been 5 inches from and thought "actually? nah..." and that just coincided with the boring chat?

Also in reverse, this situation is what I've given for the sake of variables- a rare situation when a girl instigated things, and it went wrong. Normally either that goes right, easily, or in most cases and this is what I want to talk about- it only goes right from me pursuing and doing my best, which sometimes can take considerable time.

So to flip things, I've had girls who had zero interest, and I wrote about this recently as well, but I had some form of "in" like texting, knowing them through friends, from work, and over a certain amount of time (as little as a week, as long as months) decided maybe to give me a chance. From there you can get every type of interest up to being harassed and practically stalked, the tables turn.

The physical attraction was always somewhat there, and a mental connection made the difference, because for any decent girl she can pick out a ton of guys she can f***, that's why they have to look for something more than that.

It's like it doesn't make any sense, if these way more common examples always knew what I looked like, and didn't instantly jump at the chance to hop on my dick, what happened? I know for certain I could have never texted or attempted to talk to these girls again, and they never would have cared.

Playing hard to get? Hahaha. Yeah they were ignoring me and playing the long game, hoping they get another text from me before old age strikes. From flat out ignoring a guy, to not giving him the chance to breathe, that's quite a u-turn, and would involve some serious looksmaxxing in that short intervening period.

I don't disagree with a lot of the "Fredpill" ideology, and never have, for a lot of it you are spot on. Basic things like looks being highly important, girls (especially young girls) following their "heart" based on physical compatibility, over all this applies to a shitload of situations, but in trying to apply this to absolutely everything, you end up reaching. For me your post I quoted above is definitely "reaching".

It's a good effort and all but it isn't applicable whatsoever, you basically just said a girl who approaches a guy in a bar and attempts to flirt with him (probably under 5% of gender interactions) was never interested in him physically anyway. The rest was all a good effort at making sense of things from here, but the fundamental basis of the argument instantly crumbled.

I mean I don't get it, she wouldn't have put up with me because she was never physically attracted anyway? Just, physically attracted enough to go out of her way approach me and do all of the work?

OK.

For most women that is practically unthinkable, they'd have to really want a guy to appear as desperate as that, and for most if they like a guy they'll simply make enough eye contact as they know this is usually enough to get approached.

On any level it makes no sense, say your hypothetical had happened, I got back to her house, nearly got there and she decided to stop. How did she go from being attracted, inviting a guy back, and then u-turning?

She changed her mind? Well, what caused that? My face wouldn't have changed in an hour.

 

[Dante92]

I'm like this in restaurants when I go out to eat in a group. You won't hear a peep from me when the food arrives, while other people continue to talk I'm usually stuffing my face until it's gone.

Food > conversation

View attachment 55858

Same here. The reason is very simple.

View attachment 55854

Since I always eat by myself (and I hate to eat in company), this is my philosophy.

 

[CaptainForehead]

Same here. The reason is very simple.

View attachment 55861




Since I always eat by myself (and I hate to eat in company), this is my philosophy.

View attachment 55862

You like food and you're skinny?!
You b**ch!!!!