Reactivated My Dating Profiles, Trying To Be Enthusiastic Without Being Obsessed

[Calchas]

The sl*ts you put on a pedestal has had miles of dick. Don’t ever forget it.

Yes,but it's not bad to be another 20cm of that length.....It's not what i want,but it's not bad.

 

[IdealForehead]

With you 30 something people who are struggling I'm just wondering...how long have you been trying to find a partner? Over 5 years? I'm wondering how many years of failure I should go through before I can give up and honestly tell myself that I tried as hard as I could to overcome baldness but could not.

It has nothing to do with how many years you try to find a partner. It has to do with how many hair loss treatments you try before you give up on saving your hair.

Why handicap yourself in dating by giving up on your hair before you've truly exhausted the options?

Baldness can be overcome by not going bald, which for 99.9% of guys is entirely doable in a variety of ways if you want it bad enough and don't wait until the very end to start trying.

 

[Dontwannabeabetabob]

The sl*ts you put on a pedestal has had miles of dick. Don’t ever forget it.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Why?
Dumb question, I know.... but dude, 16 dates..... that's 16 more than me!

I was getting bitter toward the end by the vacillating of women and the effort required.

For example, I went on a date with one architect and we spent 3 or 4 hours together. She told me all about her life and her extended family. After the date was over, we walked together, she wanted to show me one of the buildings that she had designed, and she explained the concept of the building to me. Later we made out, she smiled. She then asked me to confirm that I'd get in touch to make more plans. I said yes. Following this date, she showed no interest in meeting again when I got in touch.

I was tired of it, getting bitter, and so I decided to try some other things in the meantime such as volounteering at the animal shelter. The idea was allow my mind to refresh, rather than risk falling further down the quicksand of bitterness.

Why are you getting 0 dates a year? Are you even trying?

With you 30 something people who are struggling I'm just wondering...how long have you been trying to find a partner? Over 5 years? I'm wondering how many years of failure I should go through before I can give up and honestly tell myself that I tried as hard as I could to overcome baldness but could not.

You should not expect other people's experiences to directly apply to you.

However, if you're doing the same thing over and over again and not making improvements then you will need to make modifications -- you can look up Einstein's definition of insanity. You will need to evaluate your game, your presence, your looks, your standards, etc.

Personally I think that I missed the game as it would have been easier to find a future wife at 25. More good women are single at that age. Further, OkCupid and PlentyOfFish were better dating sites for non-Chads, as the layout of the pages emphasized personality. In contrast, looks are further emphasized on modern apps.

Further, modern apps emphasize geography. My best friend met his now-wife on OkCupid back around 2011. He was browsing OkCupid (or maybe she was browsing) and noticed a nice girl some ~700 km away. So he messaged her, they connected, he drove ~10 hours to her place, and they had sex. Now they're married and expecting their first child, a daughter. That would never happen on a modern app as it is impossible to message a woman who lives that far away, as people define a 25 mile or 50 mile radius within the apps themselves.

 

[blackg]

I look more manly with some beard,but i want my hair back

Had to check the urban dictionary for ''stud muffin''.
Is it supposed to be flattering or demeaning?...I can't figure out.

Whenever I have heard this word in my travels it has always been in the positive sense.
Like if a guy you know got lucky last night, you would call him a stud muffin.

 

[blackg]

That guy looks like a douchebbag, but not because of his glasses.

Punchable face, it's more the self-righteous hipster thing that he has going.

You're starting to look like this now, mate.
I think you look more stylish and aware of current issues.

 

[blackg]

The sl*ts you put on a pedestal has had miles of dick. Don’t ever forget it.

You don't know that for sure, muh Bateman.
And stop using the term "sl*t."

 

[rclark]

rate them in their prime

View attachment 83924

Yeah, she really does look OLD AND BROKEN, doesn't she.

I can't believe he can't get someone hotter than that.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

You don't know that for sure, muh Bateman.
And stop using the term "sl*t."

I don’t know whether these sl*ts have taken miles of Chad donger or not, so you’re right in that regard.
In the same way that I don’t know if they’ve got 10 toes, but if I could bet on it then I’d do just that.

 

[blackg]

I don’t know whether these sl*ts have taken miles of Chad donger or not, so you’re right in that regard.
In the same way that I don’t know if they’ve got 10 toes, but if I could bet on it then I’d do just that.

Then I can bet on how many fingers and toes you have.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

Then I can bet on how many fingers and toes you have.

What color is your skin?

 

[CaptainForehead]

Yes,but it's not bad to be another 20cm of that length.....It's not what i want,but it's not bad.

20cm, damn!

 

[razzmatazz91]

Why are you getting 0 dates a year? Are you even trying?

I'm not trying. Not since I shaved my head and was told point-blank how horrible I look by a couple of women I knew when I was in college.
I think I don't need more confirmation that I'm ugly.

Still, it's been a long time, and I think I need to stop being so harsh and cruel to myself.
f*** it, man. I'm going to try again. I don't care if it makes me bitter.

 

[IdealForehead]

I'm not trying. Not since I shaved my head and was told point-blank how horrible I look by a couple of women I knew when I was in college.
I think I don't need more confirmation that I'm ugly.

Still, it's been a long time, and I think I need to stop being so harsh and cruel to myself.
f*** it, man. I'm going to try again. I don't care if it makes me bitter.

The nice thing is there's usually only so low you can go. And once you already expect failure and have accepted a low self-image, rejection feels more normal and stings less.

Normal people will tell you, "you need to believe you're going to succeed or you will create your own failure". But this is only true if you lack insight or self control.

If you write a super bitter or negative profile like those women who rant for paragraphs about all the things they DON'T want, or if you take intentionally terrible pictures because you can't stand the process of trying to take dozens or more until you find a few acceptable ones, or you write really unpleasant first messages, then yes, you will have created your own failure.

Otherwise, if you can mask your self loathing sufficiently to make a good profile with decent pics, and write decent messages, how you feel about yourself will mostly be irrelevant.

Plenty of good looking guys hate themselves but still do well with women. So I don't think this is an issue unless you let it be.

Either way you'll probably feel better (after any initial pain) to know you've tried. Even on things I fail miserably at, I like to know that I have tried. So definitely give it a go. (With low expectations.)

 

[razzmatazz91]

The nice thing is there's usually only so low you can go. And once you already expect failure and have accepted a low self-image, rejection feels more normal and stings less.

Normal people will tell you, "you need to believe you're going to succeed or you will create your own failure". But this is only true if you lack insight or self control.

If you write a super bitter or negative profile like those women who rant for paragraphs about all the things they DON'T want, or if you take intentionally terrible pictures because you can't stand the process of trying to take dozens or more until you find a few acceptable ones, or you write really unpleasant first messages, then yes, you will have created your own failure.

Otherwise, if you can mask your self loathing sufficiently to make a good profile with decent pics, and write decent messages, how you feel about yourself will mostly be irrelevant.

Plenty of good looking guys hate themselves but still do well with women. So I don't think this is an issue unless you let it be.

Either way you'll probably feel better (after any initial pain) to know you've tried. Even on things I fail miserably at, I like to know that I have tried. So definitely give it a go. (With low expectations.)

I do hate myself tbh. And I have struggled with that for over 15 years, as far as I can remember (I'm 26 now).
Still, I'm not trying to create my own failure.

I've never had a dating profile. As a shaved bald man, I don't really have much hope. Maybe I should look into SMP or something...
But I guess going out to meet women is going to be tougher.
I'm on the fence about that..

 

[blackg]

What color is your skin?

Purple.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

The nice thing is there's usually only so low you can go. And once you already expect failure and have accepted a low self-image, rejection feels more normal and stings less.

Normal people will tell you, "you need to believe you're going to succeed or you will create your own failure". But this is only true if you lack insight or self control.

If you write a super bitter or negative profile like those women who rant for paragraphs about all the things they DON'T want, or if you take intentionally terrible pictures because you can't stand the process of trying to take dozens or more until you find a few acceptable ones, or you write really unpleasant first messages, then yes, you will have created your own failure.

Otherwise, if you can mask your self loathing sufficiently to make a good profile with decent pics, and write decent messages, how you feel about yourself will mostly be irrelevant.

Plenty of good looking guys hate themselves but still do well with women. So I don't think this is an issue unless you let it be.

Either way you'll probably feel better (after any initial pain) to know you've tried. Even on things I fail miserably at, I like to know that I have tried. So definitely give it a go. (With low expectations.)

Dude, how did the surgery go?

How do you rate yourself lookswise post surgery?

 

[IdealForehead]

Dude, how did the surgery go?

How do you rate yourself lookswise post surgery?

Really good thanks, although I'm nervous as f*** about the scar healing! That will take months to see the final result from and will determine the degree to which I can expose my hairline, which also will determine my practical boost in attractiveness. Worse case scenario, if the scar is unfavorable, I can get some laser treatments for this or FUE to camouflage it, but it would be best if I don't need to worry about that headache. Most of these scars heal very well, but scar healing is completely individual and beyond even the surgeon's control, assuming they already did their best work to put things together nicely.

With my hair back, my hair is now somewhat like Adrien Grenier's, although not quite as curly (more wavy/flowing). ie:

I actually have a better hairline than he does now. Which is wild. My hairline is probably proportionately somewhere around Brody Jenner's:

I'd say it's pretty "Ideal"!

My surgeon did a very artful job of removing some of the NW2 zone of scalp that may have likely never grown back fully anyway, so I also have full density all over on top now, with the exception of the left corner up to maybe 2 cm into the hairline, which is maybe 70-80% of the rest of my head's density, and hopefully will be restored with my ongoing aggressive treatments. It's only really noticeable to me, and only because the rest is so thick.

Not trying to brag, but you asked! My hair is f*****g gorgeous right now.

I am planning on posting my full experience in a separate thread at some point as it's not a procedure many (any?) here have gone through, so people might find it interesting. But I'm waiting for the dust to settle completely. Mostly, like I said, I'm just waiting for the scar to heal and hopefully heal well.

Assuming my scar heals completely it's at least a 2 point boost. From definitely below average before even with my best forehead cover-up game (3-4 range), to quite easily above average now (6 range, especially for my age given most guys my age have visible hair loss) or certainly at minimum average at any age (5). I will be shocked if it doesn't manifest in increased dating success. The difference is not subtle.

It was absolutely worth it, and it gives me enormous peace to look in the mirror and see a face with much more ideal and proper proportions. My family members are the only people who have seen it so far but they have all been positively blown away, and noted happily how much more attractive it's made me, even if none of them really supported the idea beforehand.

I just measured, and it was approximately a 5 cm reduction. Yeah, my forehead was that big before. I've hated my hair since I was 10 years old. This is the first time I feel like I have a hairline and head of hair truly worth saving and one I can be happy with.

So overall I'm very, very satisfied.

 

[CaptainForehead]

Really good thanks, although I'm nervous as f*** about the scar healing! That will take months to see the final result from and will determine the degree to which I can expose my hairline, which also will determine my practical boost in attractiveness. Worse case scenario, if the scar is unfavorable, I can get some laser treatments for this or FUE to camouflage it, but it would be best if I don't need to worry about that headache. Most of these scars heal very well, but scar healing is completely individual and beyond even the surgeon's control, assuming they already did their best work to put things together nicely.

With my hair back, my hair is now somewhat like Adrien Grenier's, although not quite as curly (more wavy/flowing). ie:

View attachment 84240

I actually have a better hairline than he does now. Which is wild. My hairline is probably proportionately somewhere around Brody Jenner's:

View attachment 84241

I'd say it's pretty "Ideal"!

My surgeon did a very artful job of removing some of the NW2 zone of scalp that may have likely never grown back fully anyway, so I also have full density all over on top now, with the exception of the left corner up to maybe 2 cm into the hairline, which is maybe 70-80% of the rest of my head's density, and hopefully will be restored with my ongoing aggressive treatments. It's only really noticeable to me, and only because the rest is so thick.

Not trying to brag, but you asked! My hair is f*****g gorgeous right now.

I am planning on posting my full experience in a separate thread at some point as it's not a procedure many (any?) here have gone through, so people might find it interesting. But I'm waiting for the dust to settle completely. Mostly, like I said, I'm just waiting for the scar to heal and hopefully heal well.

Assuming my scar heals completely it's at least a 2 point boost. From definitely below average (3-4 range), to quite easily above average (6 range, especially for my age given most guys my age have visible hair loss) or certainly at minimum it brings me up to average (5). I will be shocked if it doesn't manifest in increased dating success. The difference is not subtle.

It was absolutely worth it, and it gives me enormous peace to look in the mirror and see a face with much more ideal and proper proportions. My family members are the only people who have seen it so far but they have all been positively blown away, and noted happily how much more attractive it's made me, even if none of them really supported the idea beforehand.

I just measured, and it was approximately a 5 cm reduction. Yeah, my forehead was that big before. I've hated my hair since I was 10 years old. This is the first time I feel like I have a hairline and head of hair truly worth saving and one I can be happy with.

So overall I'm very, very satisfied.

Really happy for you IdealForehead
It's great to hear about success stories in this otherwise gloomy place.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Really good thanks, although I'm nervous as f*** about the scar healing! That will take months to see the final result from and will determine the degree to which I can expose my hairline, which also will determine my practical boost in attractiveness. Worse case scenario, if the scar is unfavorable, I can get some laser treatments for this or FUE to camouflage it, but it would be best if I don't need to worry about that headache. Most of these scars heal very well, but scar healing is completely individual and beyond even the surgeon's control, assuming they already did their best work to put things together nicely.

With my hair back, my hair is now somewhat like Adrien Grenier's, although not quite as curly (more wavy/flowing). ie:

View attachment 84240

I actually have a better hairline than he does now. Which is wild. My hairline is probably proportionately somewhere around Brody Jenner's:

View attachment 84241

I'd say it's pretty "Ideal"!

My surgeon did a very artful job of removing some of the NW2 zone of scalp that may have likely never grown back fully anyway, so I also have full density all over on top now, with the exception of the left corner up to maybe 2 cm into the hairline, which is maybe 70-80% of the rest of my head's density, and hopefully will be restored with my ongoing aggressive treatments. It's only really noticeable to me, and only because the rest is so thick.

Not trying to brag, but you asked! My hair is f*****g gorgeous right now.

I am planning on posting my full experience in a separate thread at some point as it's not a procedure many (any?) here have gone through, so people might find it interesting. But I'm waiting for the dust to settle completely. Mostly, like I said, I'm just waiting for the scar to heal and hopefully heal well.

Assuming my scar heals completely it's at least a 2 point boost. From definitely below average before even with my best forehead cover-up game (3-4 range), to quite easily above average now (6 range, especially for my age given most guys my age have visible hair loss) or certainly at minimum average at any age (5). I will be shocked if it doesn't manifest in increased dating success. The difference is not subtle.

It was absolutely worth it, and it gives me enormous peace to look in the mirror and see a face with much more ideal and proper proportions. My family members are the only people who have seen it so far but they have all been positively blown away, and noted happily how much more attractive it's made me, even if none of them really supported the idea beforehand.

I just measured, and it was approximately a 5 cm reduction. Yeah, my forehead was that big before. I've hated my hair since I was 10 years old. This is the first time I feel like I have a hairline and head of hair truly worth saving and one I can be happy with.

So overall I'm very, very satisfied.

Living the dream!

Is there a cream you can take to reduce scarring?