Reactivated My Dating Profiles, Trying To Be Enthusiastic Without Being Obsessed

[razzmatazz91]

I had two dates in a row where I kissed a woman and made out at the end. This week I have three dates in three nights, which began tonight.

1) I mentioned the woman who works in medicine a few posts back. We were supposed to meet yesterday, she was going to come to my apartment and we were going to drink wine together, but she had to scrub in on an emergency surgery. I discussed this with somebody today and it was recommended to me that I not get back in touch with her, that I wait for her to get in touch. So I did that, she got in touch today to let me know what happened.

I'm not sure how I feel about her. She seems to like me a lot, and she has a decent body, but I'm not feeling it? I'll see how it goes, either way I'm not seeing her soon, as I'm going out of town this weekend, and next week there's a lot going on.

2) I went on a date tonight with a history PhD student. We talked for a few hours, she's very progressive, political, serious, kind of a female version of me in that sense which is a turnoff, she's very intellectual, ugh. We talked about serious issues so I tried to lighten up the mood to talking instead about movies, dating, travel, etc. I asked her to name the three places that she'd most like to travel to, and we both have Italy and India in our top three. I walked her to her apartment at the end, we made out, she was very enthusiastic and she grabbed me a little bit, she said that she had a great time and that I should call her.

It was a bit surprising, but while making out with her I actually felt a bit of blood rush to my dick. I guess that the new drugs that I'm on are working.

3) I'm meeting another woman tomorrow night. She's about my age, she's hot, she's ethnic, she's smart, she's artsy, and she's into dogs.

4) I'm meeting a different woman on Wednesday. We were going to meet two weeks ago or but she got sick. When she was sick I offered to drop her off some Kleenex and groceries outside her door, the context was that I had just been sick and knew what it was like, she thanks and said that this was sweet. Anyway we're meeting Wednesday, we both like a place that I have not been to in a year. She looks like she has a great rack too, but it's hard to tell for sure because her pictures are blurry.

This weekend I'm going out of town. This is a large-enough supply of woman that I'm refraining from accumulating additional contacts. Of the four women listed above, two are from bumble, one is from tinder, one is from Jswipe. It's a lot to manage, which has reduced the time available for going to yoga or for fasting.

Holy f***. You seem to be doing great, bro.

Why is this guy even on HairLossTalk.com anymore?

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Yeah well he's got some catching up to do. Guys like him and I are legit manchildren.

It's one of the consequences of not growing up a SuperChad like you Johnny Boy. We've all got catching up to do ...

Afro's just hitting his stride by the sound of things. Dude's got a more active dating life than anyone I know right now. Gotta find some girls that are exciting for a while first.

Haha you should only use the term chad for someone who looks like channing tatum or brad pitt.

 

[DoctorHouse]

WTF?!?!

Why don't you want an intelligent woman?

That's the only woman I think you would be happy with and the type of woman who would admire you.

Sometimes someone who is too much like yourself is not always a good thing. I think it's the Goldilocks and the 3 bear scenario. So far he is tasting the porridge to find just the right one. Sounds like she was too intense and serious for him. I think he is looking for a balance with someone who might be more "playful and funny" but yet can still hold her own in a conversation. However, maybe @Afro_Vacancy can tell us exactly what type of woman he sees himself marrying.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I thought Afro was 33

I'm 34.

Does that make me a liar for having once told you that I was 33?

;-)

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

How are you manipulating the algorithm, and what improvements have you made to the text?


You sl*t


What drugs are these?

I recently added

Magnesium chloride, for mood and insulin sensitivity
Zinc picolinate, for immune support, testosterone, acne reduction
adderall, for better attention
caergoline, for better sex drive
cialis, for better erections, and better urinary flow

The last two are the ones that are relevant here. I'm getting stronger, more enjoyable, and more frequent erections now. Cialis works by improving the physiology of erections, whereas cabergoline affects sex drive in the brain (probably). People think that cabergoline works by reducing the "refractory period", which is the period after ejaculation where men are lazy and asexual. It reduces prolactin and binds to the dopamine-2 receptor, in that sense the drug might very well be a pharmaceutical form of nofap.

Adderall turns out to be a good weight loss drug, which I didn't know. My appetite for food is reduced. Yesterday, I had a very hard time finishing my sandwich at lunch time. Usually I'd be able to eat two of those sandwiches and then to still have room for dessert. Apparently this is a widely known side effect. Anorexia is listed as a side effect. It's also a concern when prescribing adderall to children, as it might affect their growth since they eat less.

 

[yetti]

I recently added

Magnesium chloride, for mood and insulin sensitivity
Zinc picolinate, for immune support, testosterone, acne reduction
adderall, for better attention
caergoline, for better sex drive
cialis, for better erections, and better urinary flow

The last two are the ones that are relevant here. I'm getting stronger, more enjoyable, and more frequent erections now. Cialis works by improving the physiology of erections, whereas cabergoline affects sex drive in the brain (probably). People think that cabergoline works by reducing the "refractory period", which is the period after ejaculation where men are lazy and asexual. It reduces prolactin and binds to the dopamine-2 receptor, in that sense the drug might very well be a pharmaceutical form of nofap.

Adderall turns out to be a good weight loss drug, which I didn't know. My appetite for food is reduced. Yesterday, I had a very hard time finishing my sandwich at lunch time. Usually I'd be able to eat two of those sandwiches and then to still have room for dessert. Apparently this is a widely known side effect. Anorexia is listed as a side effect. It's also a concern when prescribing adderall to children, as it might affect their growth since they eat less.

Good article about Adderall, worth a read.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

How are you manipulating the algorithm, and what improvements have you made to the text?

I don't swipe right on every woman. Apparently, if you do that, the algorithm lowers your rank. When they lower your rank, fewer good women see you. So being selective a little pays off. You also get bumped to the top of the queue if you travel sometimes, which I do. Thus, when I go to Washington, DC it's match after match after match.

My profile text is nice, clever, meaningful, and concise:
[Redacted, available in PM by request].

The first line contains both an alliteration and a rhyme thus communicates intelligence. The second line is a good description of who I am. The last line concisely tells women three of the things that they care most about. Note that my height is exaggerated by 1 inch due to the advice of people here.

Yeah but Afro's not ready to settle down yet. That girl has commitment and marriage material written all over her. And Afro just wants to sow his wild oats. Maybe in a few years. For now he needs someone more exciting.

I like that we've now got our very own Hairlosstalk drama/sitcom going.

"The Life of Afro"

why would a politically female version of you be a turn off?

WTF?!?!

Why don't you want an intelligent woman?

That's the only woman I think you would be happy with and the type of woman who would admire you.

Intelligence is good and a must, but intellectuality/seriousness/booksmartness makes me uncomfortable.

I also don't want a woman who is my clone, or who feels like one. I myself am a serious guy, or I come off that way. People tell me to lighten up, to live a little, on a regular basis. That's a little insensitive of them as part of the reason that I'm careful and serious is as a coping mechanism for the fact that I have less margin of maneuver in my life, I can't take as many risks. I remember at a spring break in undergrad, we had 9 days off, I went to the library on each of those 9 days to study, and on the last day (a Sunday) I felt comfortable leaving early, around 7:00pm, to relax a little. That's unusual, but it's a common adaptation in men from working class homes for whom intelligence is their best asset. It's also sometimes referred to as "the immigrant spirit". I don't take many risks because I can't afford to.

I do want someone who is a bit more normal, so to speak, more outgoing. Not too much though, but someone in that general direction. That doesn't mean that I want a stupid woman (of course not), but one with better people skills than I have. I sometimes fear that my future children (should there be children) will be as unpopular in school as I was, and that would break my soul. If I have kids I'll make sure to have them interact with other kids (day care, cousins, summer camp, etc), but also it helps if they have a mother who can socialize with the other mothers and the school teachers. That's invaluable. It's also conceivable that social skills are partly genetic, which amplifies the entire line of argument above, if true.

Separately, @WhitePolarBear had actually written and convincingly argued that it's not ideal to be with a woman who is a clone.

So anyway, last night's date got back in touch with me. She watched the video of myself speaking that I sent her (that was quick) and congratulated me on being clear. She wants to go out for a movie next week when I'm back in town. I said yes.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Good article about Adderall, worth a read.

Thanks I printed the article.

It's worth noting that each of these psychological drugs works by a poorly understood mechanism of action, works differently in different people, and often produce side effects.

A few years ago I was on Strattera. That one was a super-Adderall, it suppressed my appetite even more, and it gave me unbelievable tremendous concentration. However, it also gave me side effects, specifically I could not stop going to the bathroom while on it, and thus I quit the drug. It became impossible to live. A few years have since passed and now strattera is recognized as side effects galore.

I've only been on Adderall for a few months and am on a dose in the lower half of the spectrum, 15 mg/day, in the morning. I discussed ADHD with my therapist and she doesn't think that I have it, she thinks that I have trauma, and that in many people symptoms of trauma can resemble those of ADHD. In that context, the drug can help me but it's not my underlying problem. I've had mixed assessments on ADHD in the past. A psychiatric evaluation stated that I might have ADHD, because my IQ scores were inconsistent. There's an IQ test used to evaluate ADHD made of six parts, and on those six parts my scores differed by ~30 points. The spread is usually used to diagnose, the larger the spread, the greater the argument for ADHD. However, I apparently cheated on one of the tests (lol), which was a simple video game testing reaction speed. They couldn't give me a reliable score for that, and thus could not give a conclusive assessment. I was apparently hitting the trigger too early, "anticipatory failure", lol.

Interestingly she is also skeptical that I have autism. One of her points is that I often show awareness of how other people feel, how they react, their mannerisms, etc, which autistic people don't notice as well. That suggests that my poor social skills are due to a lack of experience (I think?), but then the treatment is the same regardless: get more life experience.

 

[yetti]

Thanks I printed the article.

It's worth noting that each of these psychological drugs works by a poorly understood mechanism of action, works differently in different people, and often produce side effects.

A few years ago I was on Strattera. That one was a super-Adderall, it suppressed my appetite even more, and it gave me unbelievable tremendous concentration. However, it also gave me side effects, specifically I could not stop going to the bathroom while on it, and thus I quit the drug. It became impossible to live. A few years have since passed and now strattera is recognized as side effects galore.

I've only been on Adderall for a few months and am on a dose in the lower half of the spectrum, 15 mg/day, in the morning. I discussed ADHD with my therapist and she doesn't think that I have it, she thinks that I have trauma, and that in many people symptoms of trauma can resemble those of ADHD. In that context, the drug can help me but it's not my underlying problem. I've had mixed assessments on ADHD in the past. A psychiatric evaluation stated that I might have ADHD, because my IQ scores were inconsistent. There's an IQ test used to evaluate ADHD made of six parts, and on those six parts my scores differed by ~30 points. The spread is usually used to diagnose, the larger the spread, the greater the argument for ADHD. However, I apparently cheated on one of the tests (lol), which was a simple video game testing reaction speed. They couldn't give me a reliable score for that, and thus could not give a conclusive assessment. I was apparently hitting the trigger too early, "anticipatory failure", lol.

Interestingly she is also skeptical that I have autism. One of her points is that I often show awareness of how other people feel, how they react, their mannerisms, etc, which autistic people don't notice as well. That suggests that my poor social skills are due to a lack of experience (I think?), but then the treatment is the same regardless: get more life experience.

Cool. It's an excellent article, seems that Adderall is very addictive and over time the positive effect wears off and it becomes a problem. But besides all that I just think its a well written piece.

Bah, ADHD. Honestly I think it doesnt exist, not as something that needs to be medicated. Not for the vast majority of people who are diagnosed with it, anyway. I was a jumpy kid who couldnt concentrate, but before "ADHD" became a thing. I would have been a medicated little kid for sure. Glad I wasnt.

I knew what you meant about the girl when you wrote it. I'm a political debatey guy (as you might remember before the election... ) and also a philosophical debatey guy, and in relationships with similar women we just argued half the time. I ended up marrying a very intelligent woman who can have a good conversation about politics and has opinions but isn't a nut about pushing a position etc. A person based in reality whose grounded presence can bring me back to earth. Very happy marriage. ... Of course this woman you mentioned could be perfect for you, who knows, so not making a comment about that. But yeah...

 

[doubleindemnity]

@Afro_Vacancy I don't know how you do 3+ dates per week and maintain your sanity. I had 3 great dates last week and all of them led nowhere. In one of them, I effectively snatched defeat from the jaws of victory by trying for a makeout at the end with somebody who was ostensibly very conservative. I usually have just 1 date per week and that's manageable. I'm a total wreck after all of that. How do you keep yourself sane?

Also, I think that you should add 2 inches to your height. I add 2 and nobody has ever questioned it on apps where a height entry is required. When you do this, however, you must make sure that every woman that you have on a date has a registered height that is strictly less than your real height. If they're the same as your real height, it will be a dead giveaway in person.

 

[Calchas]

...

Hahaha!!!...Sounds like someone who's looking for a person to take care of older people.
I wonder what age group responds to you.

You're inspiring me to create a dating account,btw.
Good luck with your adventures!

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

@Afro_Vacancy I don't know how you do 3+ dates per week and maintain your sanity. I had 3 great dates last week and all of them led nowhere. In one of them, I effectively snatched defeat from the jaws of victory by trying for a makeout at the end with somebody who was ostensibly very conservative. I usually have just 1 date per week and that's manageable. I'm a total wreck after all of that. How do you keep yourself sane?

Also, I think that you should add 2 inches to your height. I add 2 and nobody has ever questioned it on apps where a height entry is required. When you do this, however, you must make sure that every woman that you have on a date has a registered height that is strictly less than your real height. If they're the same as your real height, it will be a dead giveaway in person.

You need a break from dating man.

 

[IdealForehead]

Haha you should only use the term chad for someone who looks like channing tatum or brad pitt.

Nope. I don't even know anyone in real life who looks like Channing Tatum or Brad Pitt. Guys that good looking are too rare to be relevant. Most guys who coast on easy mode with women look on par with you. You don't have to be top 0.1%. Top 5-20% is enough to give you an easy dating life and have girls want you from start to finish. Ie. Chad.

 

[CaptainForehead]

I recently added

Magnesium chloride, for mood and insulin sensitivity
Zinc picolinate, for immune support, testosterone, acne reduction
adderall, for better attention
caergoline, for better sex drive
cialis, for better erections, and better urinary flow

The last two are the ones that are relevant here. I'm getting stronger, more enjoyable, and more frequent erections now. Cialis works by improving the physiology of erections, whereas cabergoline affects sex drive in the brain (probably). People think that cabergoline works by reducing the "refractory period", which is the period after ejaculation where men are lazy and asexual. It reduces prolactin and binds to the dopamine-2 receptor, in that sense the drug might very well be a pharmaceutical form of nofap.

Adderall turns out to be a good weight loss drug, which I didn't know. My appetite for food is reduced. Yesterday, I had a very hard time finishing my sandwich at lunch time. Usually I'd be able to eat two of those sandwiches and then to still have room for dessert. Apparently this is a widely known side effect. Anorexia is listed as a side effect. It's also a concern when prescribing adderall to children, as it might affect their growth since they eat less.

Damn, last three are all prescription.

 

[Calchas]

Also, I think that you should add 2 inches to your height. I add 2 and nobody has ever questioned it on apps where a height entry is required. When you do this, however, you must make sure that every woman that you have on a date has a registered height that is strictly less than your real height. If they're the same as your real height, it will be a dead giveaway in person.

Height is never an issue,as long as man is the taller.
Look at the height gap in this couple.It's measured in heads, not inches/cm.
[MEDIA=youtube]HkXPSENNxc0[/MEDIA]
Her voice gives me a boner, btw.

 

[cantara]

Nope. I don't even know anyone in real life who looks like Channing Tatum or Brad Pitt. Guys that good looking are too rare to be relevant. Most guys who coast on easy mode with women look on par with you. You don't have to be top 0.1%. Top 5-20% is enough to give you an easy dating life and have girls want you from start to finish. Ie. Chad.

Disagree. I have a good friend who I'd describe as somebody typical for the top 20%, but at the lower end of it. He could date a lot of girls that I'd say are - already taking into account my baldness - in my league (20%-50%), they really go for him, wheras they mostly ignore me (mainly down to my lack of hair, pretty safe to assume). However, he's basically chanceless to get girls from the 20%. Really handsome guys (I'd say top 5%) pull that off - and they exist. Even the top 10% occasionally get a chance with girls 7+, but that's about it.

 

[IdealForehead]

Disagree. I have a good friend who I'd describe as somebody typical for the top 20%, but at the lower end of it. He could date a lot of girls that I'd say are - already taking into account my baldness - in my league (20%-50%), they really go for him, wheras they mostly ignore me (mainly down to my lack of hair, pretty safe to assume). However, he's basically chanceless to get girls from the 20%. Really handsome guys (I'd say top 5%) pull that off - and they exist. Even the top 10% occasionally get a chance with girls 7+, but that's about it.

Well we can all establish our own definitions of what "easy mode" in dating constitutes. Im someone who gets a less than 1/100 match rate and zero date rate on Tinder if i swipe on only thin girls. So to me, any guy in the top 20%, of which i have known many, has it comparably much easier to a ridiculous extent.

Like i said i dont know anyone who looks like Brad Pitt.

 

[cantara]

Well we can all establish our own definitions of what "easy mode" in dating constitutes. Im someone who gets a less than 1/100 match rate on Tinder if i swipe on only thin girls. So to me, anyone in the top 20% of which i have known many guys has it comparably much easier to a ridiculous extent.

Like i said i dont know anyone who looks like Brad Pitt.

Unofrtunately, I know and see guys better looking than him. :/

But yes, basically I notice the same with my close friend: compared to me he has it on easy mode, although I still don't think what's on offer to him does him justice at all. In proportion to what he represents (top 20%) he has a tough dating life actually imo. And only since I started telling him did he start realizing it...

 

[doubleindemnity]

You need a break from dating man.

Fortunately (or not), I'm getting an enforced break due to going on vacation for 2-3 weeks. When I get back, all of my muscles will be gone and it will take another 4 weeks to get them back. I wasn't able to take a photo that both displayed my muscles and garnered a high Photofeeler rating so the muscles were/are all for naught anyway. I won't have them in photos or in person. If the minoxidil somehow doesn't get through, there will be further problems. But, after the vacation it will be full steam ahead until I reach my preallocated time frame.

But seriously those 3 dates all went well and at least one of those women considered me long term material and at least 2 of them liked my muscles, which are, as mentioned, on their way out. I'm pretty sure that while I messed up in one of the dates by attempting a makeout, I also messed up in one of the other dates by not attempting a makeout. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. How can the dating process be this unforgiving? Moreover, how does one come to terms with the feeling after a date that you would be perfectly right for the person who has just rejected you, and would wholly improve their life?

 

[IdealForehead]

Fortunately (or not), I'm getting an enforced break due to going on vacation for 2-3 weeks. When I get back, all of my muscles will be gone and it will take another 4 weeks to get them back. I wasn't able to take a photo that both displayed my muscles and garnered a high Photofeeler rating so the muscles were/are all for naught anyway. I won't have them in photos or in person. If the minoxidil somehow doesn't get through, there will be further problems. But, after the vacation it will be full steam ahead until I reach my preallocated time frame.

But seriously those 3 dates all went well and at least one of those women considered me long term material and at least 2 of them liked my muscles, which are, as mentioned, on their way out. I'm pretty sure that while I messed up in one of the dates by attempting a makeout, I also messed up in one of the other dates by not attempting a makeout. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. How can the dating process be this unforgiving? Moreover, how does one come to terms with the feeling after a date that you would be perfectly right for the person who has just rejected you, and would wholly improve their life?

You realize as a man it doesn't matter what you think, since it's solely a woman's market and regardless of what you think, she has so many more options, she has no reason to particularly care.