The Frequent "official" Origin Of My Recent Failures With Women

[CaptainForehead]

Anyone seen the trailer for the upcoming release of Terminator 2 - 3D?
Schwarzenegger looks magnificent. Dem cheekbones.

 

[CopeForLife]

Her body is bangin' in that pic. What are you talking about?

Regarding wrinkles ... too much sun exposure methinks.

double it

nothing wrong with her body albeit not my taste at all

 

[Xander94]

The depth of your negativity and eloquence would definitely turn on and impress some chicks I have talked to. I bet if you got a transplant you could find a decent lady you like from an app like Okcupid even if you are a 3/10.

Lmao no I've tried online dating for 6 months havent had any success at all. Not even replies. Please don't give false hope. Real life is only option for us.

 

[JeanLucBB]

Lmao no I've tried online dating for 6 months havent had any success at all. Not even replies. Please don't give false hope. Real life is only option for us.

My profile pic is literally a retarded selfie where I look 5/10 and I get responses, I don't get how some people can get none. What norwood are you? Maybe you aren't messaging enough people. You need a shotgun approach.

 

[Xander94]

My profile pic is literally a retarded selfie where I look 5/10 and I get responses, I don't get how some people can get none. What norwood are you?

NW1,5 . You prob have high trust face I think that's my problem I look like a serial killer. My face is very low trust

 

[JeanLucBB]

NW1,5 . You prob have high trust face I think that's my problem I look like a serial killer. My face is very low trust

I feel like my face trust is one of my worst features. Maybe you just have to pretend to be more positive, and serious sounding in your messages to make up for it.

I've had two root offers this week that I've had to ghost on because of my stupid red transplant hairline which hasn't started growing yet. I bet if I used your account I could get at least some average chicks to agree to root.

 

[CopeForLife]

I find it too manly.

yes it is

 

[Xander94]

They're lying. Not really trying to actively date because they're scared and inexperienced.

I've been there, at 18-20, even if I would get replies, I would be scared to call or meet some girls.

I'm no male model too, not muscular, my hair well, everyone knows here, yet even as a slick NW5, I still had date with women that many members here would rate 6,5-7/10.

Some guys here are overly dramatic about how hard online dating is, and they never have first-hand experiences to share.

Yes, it's hard, you have to send hundreds of messages en masse. I just spammed "hey, how are you?" If you get a reply to that generic message, you can be sure that the girl is truly interested, that's the whole point.

Sending elaborate messages, or messages that kind of force the girl to reply will only delays rejection (Cf. PUA's).

So for me, spamming the whole app => getting a dozen of replies from decent-looking (looksmatched) girls => half of them agree on a date => I make out and start a fling with 3 of them => keeping them on rotation => repeat => more women that I can handle => choosing the best of them as a girlfriend.

It's that simple. Just say "hi!", works every time.

Well didnt work for me since I tried for 6 months. Real life game I am confident about succeeding though I just need to go out more.

 

[Xander94]

I don't believe you didn't get any reply. Did you use pictures taken in front of your bathroom mirror?

I have 1 party pic couple of pictures of me training 1 on the beach where my back is shown and 1 face pic.

 

[JeanLucBB]

They're lying. Not really trying to actively date because they're scared and inexperienced.

I've been there, at 18-20, even if I would get replies, I would be scared to call or meet some girls.

I'm no male model too, not muscular, my hair well, everyone knows here, yet even as a slick NW5, I still had date with women that many members here would rate 6,5-7/10.

Some guys here are overly dramatic about how hard online dating is, and they never have first-hand experiences to share.

Yes, it's hard, you have to send hundreds of messages en masse. I just spammed "hey, how are you?" If you get a reply to that generic message, you can be sure that the girl is truly interested, that's the whole point.

Sending elaborate messages, or messages that kind of force the girl to reply will only delays rejection (Cf. PUA's).

So for me, spamming the whole app => getting a dozen of replies from decent-looking (looksmatched) girls => half of them agree on a date => I make out and start a fling with 3 of them => keeping them on rotation => repeat => more women that I can handle => choosing the best of them as a girlfriend.

All of this as a tall ~6/10 skinny guy with a shaved head.

It's that simple. So please, stop with the unrealistic "you need to be 6'3, a male model and to have a perfect NW1 to even have a chance online!"

Not true.

So true about the rotation. Unfortunately I've f*****g ruined all my options by ghosting since I got the transplant after promising so many a dicking. Hopefully I can find an excuse for at least 5 or so of them. It's definitely all about the spam too. Also getting multiple apps and ones where you can message instantly like Badoo, Okcupid, POF and Feabie.

In most big cities Okcupid alone has like 30 girls who list casual sex as one of their intentions and not all of them have high standards.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

NW1,5 . You prob have high trust face I think that's my problem I look like a serial killer. My face is very low trust

You don't look untrustworthy.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

They're lying. Not really trying to actively date because they're scared and inexperienced.

I've been there, at 18-20, even if I would get replies, I would be scared to call or meet some girls.

I'm no male model too, not muscular, my hair well, everyone knows here, yet even as a slick NW5, I still had date with women that many members here would rate 6,5-7/10.

Some guys here are overly dramatic about how hard online dating is, and they never have first-hand experiences to share.

Yes, it's hard, you have to send hundreds of messages en masse. I just spammed "hey, how are you?" If you get a reply to that generic message, you can be sure that the girl is truly interested, that's the whole point.

Sending elaborate messages, or messages that kind of force the girl to reply will only delays rejection (Cf. PUA's).

So for me, spamming the whole app => getting a dozen of replies from decent-looking (looksmatched) girls => half of them agree on a date => I make out and start a fling with 3 of them => keeping them on rotation => repeat => more women that I can handle => choosing the best of them as a girlfriend.

All of this as a tall ~6/10 skinny guy with a shaved head.

It's that simple. So please, stop with the unrealistic "you need to be 6'3, a male model and to have a perfect NW1 to even have a chance online!"

Not true.

You're 6'3, white, and better than 6/10.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

So true about the rotation. Unfortunately I've f*****g ruined all my options by ghosting since I got the transplant after promising so many a dicking. Hopefully I can find an excuse for at least 5 or so of them. It's definitely all about the spam too. Also getting multiple apps and ones where you can message instantly like Badoo, Okcupid, POF and Feabie.

In most big cities Okcupid alone has like 30 girls who list casual sex as one of their intentions and not all of them have high standards.

How are Badoo and feabie?

 

[Dante92]

You don't look untrustworthy.

We already told him he doesn't have any real problem, if not mental. He has to get "purified" by the lookism bullshit that basically polluted his mind. But at this point I begin to wonder if he merely likes to complain and if he isn't a little bit of an attention wh***.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

This online dating article aggravated the sh*t out of me. It's on jswipe but it's not specifically Jewish. I feel like doing a point by point obliteration on the one hand, on the other hand it will make me angry.

http://forward.com/scribe/372514/an-insiders-guide-to-staying-sane-on-jswipe/

An Insider’s Guide To Staying Sane On JSwipe

Just over a year ago, I was a nervous wreck. I was set to move to a new city over 2,000 miles away for my last summer internship before my senior year of college. The number of people I knew there could be counted on a single hand.

Inspired by friends, I made a J Swipe account. It seemed like a great way to meet more people in a new city while going on fun dates.

Within weeks, I wished I consulted a guide online on how to navigate J Swipe. At first, it drove me crazy the amount of mind games I ended up playing —there was a reason I studied business in school and not psychology. To save you confusion and stress, I’ve written a guide that has never appeared on my newsfeed. The anecdotes shared in this guide are both my own experiences as well as my friends’ respective adventurous stories on the app.

11) Update your location distances
Make sure your distance is set for guys you actually could potentially see. Remember that major cities have suburbs, and most public transportation from the city to the suburbs is a pain in the butt to use. It will only get your hopes let down if you really like a guy you’re messaging but realize he is 30 miles away.

10) Don’t overthink your profile
My first profile description resembled more of my public Twitter account than my personal Instagram account. I wanted to impress the guys—after all, as any girl I would think, I was not any “typical girl” on J Swipe. Therefore, I wanted my profile so somehow convey that I was a strong, independent young woman. What I found, though, was that I was matching with the wrong guys. These guys thought they knew me based on this profile description of what I did—not who my character was.

After a few weeks, I did a mini test: I changed my profile to instead resemble something more casual. While my new description was a bit more basic, but at the end of day, I began to match with more guys. Consequently, the conversation became more genuine. I realized that these guys first learned my character before learning about what I did outside of my summer internship and classes during the school year. Messaging first?

I am not sure what the psychology is behind who messages who first. Is it the guy’s job? Is it the girl’s? What does society say? Frankly, it doesn’t matter. If a guy is super interested, he will message you first. And if a guy is shy, then maybe he won’t message you first. Regardless, if you are interested in a guy, play to your confidence and message him. If he is interested, he’ll respond. If not—go message another.

9) They never look like their pictures
They never do. ‘Nuff said. Snapchat is a better way to see what they really look like.

8) Don’t waste your time
There will be guys who write lewd, crude, disrespectful messages to you because they misinterpret something you wrote. These will be the messages that you will never want a parent to see. Block them. Disengage.

7) Don’t get your hopes up
I’ll admit that it’s always exciting when matching with an Israeli. It is extra exciting when he wants to go on a date with you. Whether fortunately or unfortunately, I did not hit it off with the particular Israeli that seemed profile-perfect. He was an entrepreneur, and we had a bunch of mutual AIPAC friends on Facebook. It was clear that he was into me based on my first profile, the one that was more like my show-off Twitter public profile. During the “date,” the guy began to talk to me about drugs. I got high on clean oxygen when hiking; he got high on weed when hiking. To each their own.

6) The ‘And-You’ Factor
The And-You-Factor weeds out the selfish, self-centered guys. Time after time, this rule seems to find the gems. This rule applies after a guy answers your question about himself. After answering, does he ask “and what about you?” It is not your responsibility to feign interest and ask about him the whole time you are together nor is it your responsibility to maintain the conversation. If he is not asking you questions back to keep the conversation going, then I don’t suggest another date.

5) Treatment of the Waiter
You can always tell the true character of a person based on his or her treatment of certain people. For example, how does the guy treat the waiter taking your order or the busboy pouring more water into his glass? Pay attention. Bookend the first date

One of the most awkward dates I had was at the We Work in the financial district of the city. It was a gorgeous space, where they had free beer and inspiring decorations on each floor. Just walking around, I realized what I was missing out on in my own corporate office space a block away.

The mistake I learned on this date was to bookend a date. This means that prior to starting the date, set a limit so that it is not awkward if you want to end the date. Moreover, this is especially important if there is no clear ‘end point’ during the date. An ‘end point’ means a waiter bringing the check or the hour-long lunch break coming to an end. At We Work, there was no such destination since the guy asked me to meet him there to a, impress me, and b, leverage the free beer.

Therefore, when the conversation bore me, and I realized my values did not align with the stranger before me, I felt rude awkwardly looking at my watch. An hour had passed, and I wanted this to be over. But I didn’t know how to leave without being rude. If only I knew to bookend.

4) It’s okay to be a feminist and appreciate chivalry
With an intern salary — whether it is corporate or nonprofit — it can be nice when he pays for dinner or fro-yo or drinks. It also can be nice when he holds the door open for you, smiles, and shrugs saying “ladies first.”

As Emma Watson stated in March of 2015, feminism and chivalry are not mutually exclusive. Feminism is believing in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. Bustle’s Lulu Chang sums it up perfectly: “Feminism does not stand at odds with chivalry, with general human decency, with kindness. … We do not have to lose to gain. We do not have to ask men to shut doors for us so that we can open them ourselves.”

3) Set Limits
I don’t watch much TV. But there is a key takeaway from an episode of “How I Met Your Mother” that has always stuck with me: nothing good ever happens after 2:00 a.m. Our decision-making processes are impaired after a night of heavy pre-gaming before the bars and clubs. The guys who messages you at 2am only wants a booty call, most likely, if he didn’t make plans with you at another time of day. Don’t let alcohol sway your judgement for the worse.

2) Consent is hot
According to the University of Michigan Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Center, “consent is when someone agrees, gives permission, or says ‘yes’ to sexual activity with other persons.” Consent is not just for sex—it can be for anything. No guy is entitled, and you are not expected to do any sexual activity. Thus, if a guy goes down on you without asking for your permission, he is violating consent.

Furthermore, there is no benchmarking when it comes to dating. Whether it be the first, second, or fifth date, you are not obligated to do anything for or with the guy after the date. You call the shots. And the guy who tells you most girls do XYZ after the 123 date is the guy who is most definitely not an NJB.

1) The ones who say they are mensches are not
When swiping through the guys’ profiles in the app, each one will try to impress you with how “Jewish” and funny their profile is. There will be way too many jokes related to “you’re the lox to my bagel.” There also will be way too many guys calling themselves a mensch. Remember what your grandmother taught you: a mensch does not know he is one. One who thinks he is a mensch is not.

The author is a recent college graduate living in Chicago.

Guide to online dating written by a woman.

 

[Xander94]

Guide to online dating written by a woman.

 

[Dante92]

Guide to online dating written by a woman.

It's like good-looking fullheads giving advice to ugly baldcels.

 

[CopeForLife]

They're lying. Not really trying to actively date because they're scared and inexperienced.

I've been there, at 18-20, even if I would get replies, I would be scared to call or meet some girls.

I'm no male model too, not muscular, my hair well, everyone knows here, yet even as a slick NW5, I still had date with women that many members here would rate 6,5-7/10.

Some guys here are overly dramatic about how hard online dating is, and they never have first-hand experiences to share.

Yes, it's hard, you have to send hundreds of messages en masse. I just spammed "hey, how are you?" If you get a reply to that generic message, you can be sure that the girl is truly interested, that's the whole point.

Sending elaborate messages, or messages that kind of force the girl to reply will only delays rejection (Cf. PUA's).

So for me, spamming the whole app => getting a dozen of replies from decent-looking (looksmatched) girls => half of them agree on a date => I make out and start a fling with 3 of them => keeping them on rotation => repeat => more women that I can handle => choosing the best of them as a girlfriend.

All of this as a tall ~6/10 skinny guy with a shaved head.

It's that simple. So please, stop with the unrealistic "you need to be 6'3, a male model and to have a perfect NW1 to even have a chance online!"

Not true.

Said by non-ethnic tall NT (very important) proportionate guy with good facial bones and nose. You had only one disadvantage that is hugely advanced balding and still got mentally challenged back to that years.

You are at least 7/10 in Europe let alone another genetically sh*t tier regions like Asia, Latin America, Slavs etc where you gonna be a God.

People here on HLТ suffer much more in both mental and looks departments. I saw how @Exodus2011 got damaged by hairloss and it's MUCH devastating than even yours case albeit your hairloss were quite even.

That's good advices you've listed but it better to share them on PUA forums not here.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

They only reply and meet to the guy they find the best-looking (who are their type).

It doesn't matter what the guy has written on his profile, if his pictures are taken in his bathroom, if he has pictures with girls, if he's bland and not funny during the conversation, etc.

All the above will be rationalized through the halo effect: "OMG he wrote that he liked pizza, so random, so funny haha!". "He's taking pictures in his bathroom mirror?! OMG he's so humble that he doesn't need elaborate pictures to pretend he's interesting!" "I love how he is to the point when we're talking, no BS!"

Looks + compatibility.

That's all there is to it to get sex.

For a relationship though, you need: to be taller than the girl in heels, a job (money and status), hobbies (being interesting and funny).

Only girls with personality disorders will keep on dating a boring tall good-looking guy that spends his days playing the Xbox and eating cheetos.

And as @CopeForLife has pointed out: be normal (neurotypical).

Apparently this one is not a given for a lot of people when I look around me.

Guide to online dating for girls summarized in 1 sentence: Wait for Chad to message you.

 

[Xander94]

I'm getting overrated here.

I've been rated from 4,5/10 to 8/10.

The truth must be in the middle, roughly 6,25/10.

Ah that Italian girl, good times, I would bring up the fact that I was bald at only 23 (she was 26) and her reaction was:

"But you're cute so it doesn't matter!"

*finishes his beer* "We go to your place?" "OK "

The fact that you had this solid success in your mid/late 20s means you are solid above average 7/10.