Social Skills And Your Looks.

[Hairon]

You don't understand how women's superpowers work Hairon,

Women don't care about the genetics involved in intelligence, emotional acuity, drive, ambition, sense of humour, compassion, likelihood of depression, muscle tone, body fat, et cetera.

All that matters are the genetics of facial bone structure, and maybe smell. That's where the superpowers are focused, because it guarantees the success of the species, if not for women being that smart the human race would be extinct.

We know women care about a man's scent for example, which proves it's all genetics, as scent isn't influenced by diet and lifestyle.

;-)

Actually Fred is right about smell, pheromones is a real thing, scent can be influenced by diet and life style but different people still have different scents, even if they will have the same lifestyle, that is actually genetic as well, and different people will be attracted to different pheromones, different scents.

The thing is it's just a small factor of attraction.

no hot girl will date a 300 pounds guy just because she is attracted to their smell, just like Fred wouldn't date a whale because she smells good, women wouldn't too, yet we just got an example that it happened, several times! so it wasn't attraction.
Women cannot see the jawline of fat men as well, it's hidden by fat.
but of course according to the all knowing Fred, women have their genetic x-vision so they must have seen through his fat and saw a square god-tier jaw. must be.

 

[I.D WALKER]

Pussy.

A women most valued tool, and weapon for control. When done right will regulate most men...

Ah I see now, pussies will forever yield to pussy
and frisky dogs are going to submit to their alpha b****s.

 

[Wolf Pack]

I think social skills does have personality to it. People around me have often told me that I am charming, they can't pinpoint what is it but they like my unique company. I also feel the same about certain people a lot. Is it looks? To a small extent. I think more than that the ability to get close, analyse, understand, question someone in a natural manner is a skill. We cannot see each others faces on here, yet there are people I know I would drink with and am curious/attracted to their personality, others I wouldn't.

 

[blackg]

Scent and genetics definitely play a role. Personally I would like to be better looking, but who wouldn't?

Is that Jim Morrison as your avatar?

 

[Wolf Pack]

"Small extent" my foot. Pretty sure you're quite good-looking. Obviously, we'll never know, as you said.

If you think non verbal and verbal behaviour means **** all I don't know what to say. We are talking social skills here, not sexual attraction.

 

[blackg]

People tell you that you're charming because you're good looking Wolf.

Can't have your cake and eat it too here.

You say looks are extremely important and will make people behave like puppies around you.

Then you say, "Yeah I'm all that but it's actually my charms and my amazing personality doing the trick!"

No, it's your looks, or should I say your beauty. Anything you do would be interpreted positively.

Shy? How cute!

Arrogant? He's so bold, he doesn't care about what others think!

Awkward? So cute!

Complaining about something? "Yeah I know right!"

Try there as an average-looking guy and see the responses you will get from people.

They won't be so positive.

Halo effect.

Unfortunately this is largely true. I have seen the halo effect in many situations.
The better looking the person, the brighter the halo, to state the obvious.

 

[jd_uk]

People tell you that you're charming because you're good looking Wolf.

Can't have your cake and eat it too here.

You say looks are extremely important and will make people behave like puppies around you.

Then you say, "Yeah I'm all that but it's actually my charms and my amazing personality doing the trick!"

No, it's your looks, or should I say your beauty. Anything you do would be interpreted positively.

Shy? How cute!

Arrogant? He's so bold, he doesn't care about what others think!

Awkward? So cute!

Complaining about something? "Yeah I know right!"

Try there as an average-looking guy and see the responses you will get from people.

They won't be so positive.

Halo effect.

You know what would be a great idea is if you started a new thread about looks and attraction. That would be original and get people really interested.

 

[Wolf Pack]

People tell you that you're charming because you're good looking Wolf.

Can't have your cake and eat it too here.

You say looks are extremely important and will make people behave like puppies around you.

Then you say, "Yeah I'm all that but it's actually my charms and my amazing personality doing the trick!"

No, it's your looks, or should I say your beauty. Anything you do would be interpreted positively.

Shy? How cute!

Arrogant? He's so bold, he doesn't care about what others think!

Awkward? So cute!

Complaining about something? "Yeah I know right!"

Try there as an average-looking guy and see the responses you will get from people.

They won't be so positive.

Halo effect.

That's true to an extent like I said before. But it still doesn't explain how people who haven't seen someone's face on a forum can respect their social skills or see them in a positive light. I have that with quite a few people. Social skills may be genetically determined but not by looks, more by personality (verbal and non verbal cues), it can be changed to an extent. To say everything is to do with looks is a way to say I cannot change anything. And you most certainly can. The comments are from girls and guys so it's not about sexual attraction.

 

[blackg]

You haven't done much online dating, have you?

I've experienced this many times: I talk with a girl for weeks, months, and find her absolutely awesome.

Then I meet her and it's a huge disappointment, she's nothing like the person I've talked with online for so much time.

I've stopped doing this for about 2 years now. I know it's pointless.

And interestingly enough, the opposite has been true many times.

I remember talking to this American girl three years ago, and I thought: "Man she seems so boring and blunt in her replies."

Then I saw her, and she was radiating with positive energy and I felt so good in her presence.

So yeah, from my experience, you can't tell much from online.

A lot of people think on this forum think I must be so incisive and serious in real life from the way I write here.

And I completely understand why they would think this. I'm a completely different person in real life.

And you can tell much about someone's real life personality from what he writes on a forum.

Even though I still tell people the same ideas I write on here. The difference is that it's taken as humor.

Thank god. If it wasn't, I would be burned at the stake.

good

 

[jd_uk]

That post was very useful.

When will you guys (hair loss and jd) actually come up with arguments?

At least Hairon is saying something and not using ad hominems.

Learn to debate.

1) you don't debate. You state an opinion, over and over and over.

2) i'm not sure 'debating' the same topic every single day is the way I want to spend my life.

 

[Joan]

I think social skills does have personality to it. People around me have often told me that I am charming, they can't pinpoint what is it but they like my unique company. I also feel the same about certain people a lot. Is it looks? To a small extent. I think more than that the ability to get close, analyse, understand, question someone in a natural manner is a skill. We cannot see each others faces on here, yet there are people I know I would drink with and am curious/attracted to their personality, others I wouldn't.

I feel the same way, Wolf Pack.

 

[Swoop]

Funny huh, how much in life is determined through genetics. Intelligence, personality, looks etc.

 

[cocohot]

My personality is completely different in real life too. I make jokes and have fun, I don't really talk about anything too serious. That's the purpose of this forum to me.

 

[I.D WALKER]

Yes when you're already feeling low, punchlines are not usually much fun for those of on the receiving end of them.
Yet we are forced to absorb each unsolicited blow and we better laugh it off fast.
Less we play into the hands of their preconceived biases and only ingrain the ignorance. Funny stuff.. that ol' irony.

 

[Rudiger]

That post was very useful.

When will you guys (hair loss and jd) actually come up with arguments?

At least Hairon is saying something and not using ad hominems.

Learn to debate.

I do regularly, and you regularly either ignore them, or try change the subject, or try change the subject until I refuse to let you avoid the original argument and THEN you ignore them.

As for being accused by 2 or 3 people, Fred you know it's much more than that. I wonder if your narcissism actually genuinely blocks it out, but it is much more than that.

"Learn to debate". = make insane claims and then back-peddle while changing the subject with smoke and mirrors. For that, I admit you are hands down the master.

 

[I.D WALKER]

It's better to cultivate one's strengths than to constantly try to correct or hide one's weaknesses.

Yes I think most of us get into trouble here.
I still like to believe that when we focus upon our stronger part(s),
the incomplete picture of ourselves will start to fill in and our personal deficits too
may even become surprisingly less irksome.

 

[Rudiger]

Yep, people who have been in high school with my father told me he was very shy, awkward, and that he didn't talk much.

I was exactly the same in high school.

My uncle used to beat my aunt, my cousin now does the same to his girlfriend.

A girl I know has a mother who had 7 kids from 7 different father.

She currently has 4 kids from 3 different father. But she's "only" 27, more to come!

So yeah, intelligence, personality and behavioral patterns are also genetic.

If you have two parents that are introverts (like me), it's almost sure that you will be one yourself.

You will never become an extrovert if you're an introvert and vice-versa.

I've said it before: you have to take advantage of what you've been given.

It's better to cultivate one's strengths than to constantly try to correct or hide one's weaknesses.

Well, these are debatable, I'd like to know what cocohot thinks on this because he insists that there's no link whatsoever to DNA and your children.

But in these examples they are of course linked to environmental causes. A boy grows up seeing his mother being beat up, he thinks that's natural, so he does the same. A girl grows up with her mother getting pregnant from different fathers, she thinks that's normal, and does the same.

Although I am of the belief that DNA does indeed have an affect on your children's behaviour, I'm not sure these very particular social situations and reactions can ever be proven. Is there a gene for aggression or compulsive behaviour? Does that girl have a gene representing promiscuous behaviour? Or possibly a mix of promiscuous, and some other form of social disorder that stops men from staying with her?

As for being shy in high school I mean, that's like what, a half, or a third of children? A lot of people are introverted when finding themselves in confusing times such as puberty, I don't know if we can link that to DNA.

Yes I think most of us get into trouble here.
I still like to believe that when we focus upon our stronger part(s),
the incomplete picture of ourselves will start to fill in and our personal deficits too
may even become surprisingly less irksome.

But in all practicality it's the same thing trying to cultivate strengths instead of hide weaknesses, for example you can't become more extroverted without trying to tackle the reasons you are introverted.

Unless you're really breaking down the reasons you are what you are and what your strengths and weaknesses are, as "introverted" and "extroverted" are pretty broad spectrums.

For example if you are a good conversationalist on a one-to-one basis you may try to build on that into being able to talk to 2 people, and realising one-on-one conversations don't work the same, you need to adapt to slightly more of a group chat and can't just engage and talk by the previous means. Then build up into being comfortable with a group of people etc. when you realise that in a group, conversation is light hearted and rarely touches on anything too meaningful.

 

[I.D WALKER]

Yes I would add that one can hardly grow into their perception of a successful individual
by developing only what he/she (pre) determines as their superior trait(s).One can choose to overlook or repress their lesser redeeming aspect(s)
of character, that is if one perceives them as useless or annoying thorns in their side in the first place.
Or else one can strive to broaden their attitude and shatter their self deception with a deliberate hammer- like will and constructively reshape the "lesser self" on the anvil of hard work and clear(er) conviction.
Transforming it into a practical tool of eg; social or economical utility until ultimately a more complete person
emerges

 

[cocohot]

Well, these are debatable, I'd like to know what cocohot thinks on this because he insists that there's no link whatsoever to DNA and your children.

But in these examples they are of course linked to environmental causes. A boy grows up seeing his mother being beat up, he thinks that's natural, so he does the same. A girl grows up with her mother getting pregnant from different fathers, she thinks that's normal, and does the same.

Although I am of the belief that DNA does indeed have an affect on your children's behaviour, I'm not sure these very particular social situations and reactions can ever be proven. Is there a gene for aggression or compulsive behaviour? Does that girl have a gene representing promiscuous behaviour? Or possibly a mix of promiscuous, and some other form of social disorder that stops men from staying with her?

As for being shy in high school I mean, that's like what, a half, or a third of children? A lot of people are introverted when finding themselves in confusing times such as puberty, I don't know if we can link that to DNA.



But in all practicality it's the same thing trying to cultivate strengths instead of hide weaknesses, for example you can't become more extroverted without trying to tackle the reasons you are introverted.

Unless you're really breaking down the reasons you are what you are and what your strengths and weaknesses are, as "introverted" and "extroverted" are pretty broad spectrums.

For example if you are a good conversationalist on a one-to-one basis you may try to build on that into being able to talk to 2 people, and realising one-on-one conversations don't work the same, you need to adapt to slightly more of a group chat and can't just engage and talk by the previous means. Then build up into being comfortable with a group of people etc. when you realise that in a group, conversation is light hearted and rarely touches on anything too meaningful.

When did I ever say anything like that?

This generation of German men would be throwing Jews into ovens instead of importing millions of immigrants if violence was genetic. I think that kind of violence is analogous to your wife beating example.

I don't know ultimately, it's a very interesting question what is genetically predetermined and what isn't.

 

[Rudiger]

I'm confused, I am pretty much completely sure you posted articles and made arguments on how there is no direct link to genetics and behaviour, it's all environment. That's what I'm saying in that quote.

Your example just further says the same argument. Or perhaps my assertion that you said there's NO LINK whatsoever was a bit too far? And you believe there's some links but it's limited?