" Sorry, I'm Not Into Bald Guys. You Should Try Approaching A Bald Woman."

[cocohot]

That's a poem.

Doesn't mean it's possible.

There is getting along and getting along.

What I mean is: I don't feel good around certain people, and never will.

Sour grapes over what? Getting along with these people would bring me zero benefits.

You can only do so much. If you don't belong somewhere, you should be able to notice it.

That's the essence of social skills: intuition and being able to act accordingly.

Trying too hard to get along with people who wouldn't like you for who you are? Sad.

Again, look around you: no one gets along with everyone on a deep level.

The bolded is 100% the fox and the grapes. You would love if everyone liked you.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

You can only be yourself unfortunately, don't you know this already?

Adapting to others is never going to work, tried that before many times, always failed.

It's not people skills, I really think people get along or not based on a predetermined compatibility.

I believe we're animals at the core, I know it sounds cliche but, how else are you going to explain the situations I've mentioned?

I don't think I have Asperger at all, I'm just very sensitive, which immediately allows me to know if I'm hitting it off with someone or not.

You can't fool me in that department. Unfortunately, it will also make me want to avoid negative emotions as much as I can.

I see being highly-sensitive as both a blessing and a curse. The people I get along with, I get along with them extremely well.

My relationships with women usually work very well too.

What you've seen as mining engineering, I've seen it many times, lower-class, less intelligent people throwing jokes and insults at each other, and looking at you like you're a complete weirdo because you can't behave like that.

I can smell the fakeness all over the place. These people never have strong and meaningful relationships. They lack self-awareness and rarely reflect on what they're doing. I want nothing to do with that kind of people.

There's no use trying to integrate their world, you know they will never appreciate you no matter what you do or say, right?

It's not an ability, it's just impossible to do. I mean, look around you, people always stick to their own "kind".

Adaptiveness is itself a skill. My sister is a great salesman, she changes her accent, vocabulary, subject of conversation, poise, etc depending on who she's trying to close a sale with. She does it well, as demonstrated by her results. There's a lot that goes into that, not just having your own range but being able to read people quickly, effectively, and accurately.

I'm pretty sure you have Asperger's. I get that from your penchant for politically incorrect commentary. You cannot go against the grain so often and so regularly and so vigorously unless you have Aspergers or perhaps some other psychological deviation from the mean -- I'm deliberately not calling it a disorder. The majority of people out there are driven to agree with the popular consensus on all issues without question and without even realising that they're not questioning things. Aside from your lack of sheepness, you're also obsessive.

Plenty of intellectuals or white-collar workers are "fake" by the way. They either don't question things, or they merely question the things that are socially acceptable to question. Meanwhile there was plenty of genuineness among the manual labourers, I got to know a few. Sometimes we'd talk and they'd tell me their dreams, to build a house for their family, etc. You can talk to @buckthorn about this as he works in construction/real estate and knows a lot of these people, no blue-collars are not all "fake". Meanwhile, there's plenty of insults among white-collar people, it just takes a different form, a lot of passive aggressiveness, undermining people's contributions, et cetera.

Whether or not people appreciate you largely comes down to what you have to offer.

A few years ago we had a colloquial lecture on what makes a good power point presentation. We got advice like bringing up questions, not cluttering the screen, preparing, sticking to time, et cetera. All of that matters. They concluded with mentioning that the single most important thing, that trumps everything else, is whether or not you have anything to say -- the quality of your results. If you've measured something new, differently, or discovered something different, that's the most important thing.

Meanwhile, as I've noticed, people with a lot of "slick" who have nothing to say are the most annoying.

But once you have something to say, put in a bit more effort to polish.

 

[cocohot]

That's not possible.

Most people are aware of this.

Now what?

I notice a pattern here.

It's like your: "what's the point getting women, having kids, you'll get old and she'll get old anyway!"

And?

That's unavoidable.

It is possible if you have a good sense of humour and don't have limited interests.

And that's how I feel sometimes, baldness was a catalyst for depression, when I'm in that mood I can't see the good in anything.

Why are you suddenly being so aggressive to everyone? Calling people genetically inferior losers who should give up on life? Taunting David MPN for ED? Even trying to attack me for my depression which I'm completely open about, what's going on with you? You're never like this.

Not mention you have terrible genes yourself. Or that you have manic depression etc. Hypocritical.

 

[cocohot]

Never done any of these things.

Weird attempt as gaslighting.

Read my post above, seen a lot of psychiatrists, psychologists and other mental health professionals, and I was never diagnosed with anything.

So why do you insist like that? You keeping on saying these things is not going to make them real.

Yes, I would have crooked teeth and a bald head without orthodontics and my hair transplant.

So that means I have terrible genes? Come on now.

You did all these things and I'll post the quotes below to prove it:

Your skin, hair, teeth and eyes are bad naturally. Without surgical intervention you would look very bad.


Saying a guy should give up on life because he has bad genes:

If it is hard for you to get laid, and you need to spend years in the gym and countless rejections to get there, it means you should not be allowed to get laid.

Translation: women don't want your genes. Accept it and move on. And please stop embarrassing yourself by trying to act "alpha" at bars.

attacking david mpn:

I would gladly share what I do during my extra free time, but I'll spare you the incel rage.

Nice pictures by the way, but sex while travelling is really the cherry on top.

Who knows, if you gymcel a few years more, it will be possible for you too.

And you attacked me for expressing depressed thoughts above.


Why are you so aggressive lately?

 

[cocohot]

You said yourself you are a manic depressive like your father, have you changed your mind?

 

[cocohot]

Yes, I said that to David and I apologized.

And what does it have to do with his ED?

I didn't know he had that.

It was about "hitting the gym to get women".

Did you even read my posts? I've never actually worn glasses, I had them to go to the movies or for university.

And my skin is quite fine, I just had some again as a teen and on and off in my early 20's.

My hair and teeth yeah, and it got partially fixed. For both, my lower teeth are still a bit messed up but you barely see it.

It was still a vicious attack on David even if you didn't know he had ED. You still told that guy to give up because he had bad genes.

When you brought what I'd said about the futility of life, did you want to discuss it or were you attacking me? Did I trigger depression in you when I said that?

Without surgery you would have glasses, acne, breasts, crooked teeth and an NW5 bald head. How can you taunt others for bad genes?

Self-diagnosed.

For my father too, he regularly sees a psychiatrist and he was not diagnosed with anything.

No one in my family has been.

I mean yeah, I had major depression, but it was clearly circumstantial.

I'm not naturally depressed for no reason.

I don't believe anyone at all has depression for no reason.

 

[cocohot]

Again, I've never worn glasses in my daily life, I've barely had any acne and my breasts were caused by medication.

You have to be trolling now.

I don't tell anyone to give up on life, just to be realistic.

Wolf told David how he could improved himself and he did. I've seen that he looks better from the pictures he posted.

My only problem as you may have noticed is this "just lift and get muscles and everything will be alright with women!" ideology. That's it.

Lol, triggering depression in me. It's quite impossible for me to be depressed right now.

You literally told him to give up. He is making himself more attractive with hard work and effort in the gym, you did it with surgery. Both approaches are successful if they make you look much better. You can post pictures of ugly men on steroids, and I could post a picture of someone with bad plastic surgery, doesn't prove anything. Why does it make you so angry that you attack people really personally and call them genetically inferior and tell them to give up and stop embarrassing themselves approaching women?

And btw, don't you think most of your internet dating success is because you get through the height filter women use when they search and are one of a tiny pool of men your height on dating apps?

If I didn't trigger depression in you by saying that, why did you bring up what I'd said? It seemed unrelated to anything we were discussing.

 

[cocohot]

4 of the girls I'm currently dating come from Tinder.

There is no height filter on Tinder.

I bring it up because it's so bizarre, complaining about things no one can do anything about, like ageing.

It was not unrelated. You said "you would love it if you were loved by everyone".

Being loved by everyone is just as impossible as not getting old.

Well I can't do anything about going bald either, but it makes my professional, sexual and social life worse so it makes me depressed. The prospect of being middle aged is exactly the same isn't it? Why wouldn't I find the idea of being a bald 45 year old depressing when you look at how empty the life of a 45 year old man is.

There's a great movie about how terrible a middle aged man's life is called American Beauty starring Kevin Spacey.

 

[Aldrich]

Not really, we all know we will get old, it's sad for sure, but you can make the best of your youth.

I talk about this with my grandparents and yes, they'll say it sucks and that they wish they were still young.

But they're not depressed, they've had their fair share of fun in their youth, they've had my mother, a family.

Can you get it through your skull that not everyone has the same goal in life? Marriage is a f*****g scam and the nuclear family is pointless. None of those two things bring happiness. A wife is just an expensive escort without guaranteed sex. Your grandfather won't say to your face, but he is the saddest man in your entire family. His one regret in life is your grandmother.

 

[blackg]

Your grandfather won't say to your face, but he is the saddest man in your entire family. His one regret in life is your grandmother.

Damn, that's a bit harsh.

 

[cocohot]

Eh... Can I say you could have a hair transplant? Some hair? A frame for your face?

No? You're another of these NW7's with thin donor? OK, it seems everyone is these days.

And I thought they made up for 10% of balding people.

Not really, we all know we will get old, it's sad for sure, but you can make the best of your youth.

I talk about this with my grandparents and yes, they'll say it sucks and that they wish they were still young.

But they're not depressed, they've had their fair share of fun in their youth, they've had my mother, a family.

And they're happy, despite being in their 80's.

I've seen American Beauty when I was 16, I've always told myself I would never become that guy.

Not all 45 year old men have empty lives and are depressed.

Well, my father is for example. But let's stop and look at him for a second.

He's letting himself go, currently 105 kg for 1m80, he spends his days browsing Facebook at home, and he's negative about everything.

He's miserable because he chooses to be.

I was really happy before I went bald, that's no consolation to me now I'm bald.

My concern is scarring, I scar very easily and my FUE scars would look bad and not fade well if I had a transplant.

Does your dad choose to be miserable or is it just that he can only have sex with your middle aged mother and is too old to do fun things? It doesn't really matter if he lets himself go because he's too old and therefore ugly to enjoy life regardless. People that age stop caring because it doesn't really matter anymore.

How can you stop yourself being like Kevin Spacey in American Beauty? His character did nothing wrong, his wife was just nagging him and denying him sex and his daughter hated him. He was trapped. What could you do to stop that happening?

Normal people are not movie stars like George Clooney and for your average man everything comes crashing to a halt somewhere between 35 and 45.

 

[cocohot]

I know my father could look great if he put some effort into it.

He could still look good for his age, but he just does not give a f***.

Yet he still wears his hair piece for some reason. It doesn't make much sense.

My father is a photographer and he actually gets messages from women everyday on Facebook.

They tell him they love his work and that they'd like to meet him.

He laughs about it and would never actually agree to meet these women.

He often brags about being faithful to my mother. So yeah, my father isn't like me in that aspect.

So in summary: he could look good, he could meet women, he could live an interesting life...

He just chooses not to.

They'd find out about his wig though. Ever think that might be a factor?

 

[cocohot]

No, the main factor is that he's really shy, so it's always been easier for him to just remain faithful to my mother.

He had relationships before my mother, and apparently they've never found out about his hair piece.

This has been confirmed by my family. One of the girls that he dated for 1 year and a half was a hairdresser.

That's why I think it's important to remind the members here that people outside the world of hair loss often have no clue.

So no, they would not necessarily find out about his wig. Just like the girls I'm dating don't find out about my hair transplant.

Well if they pulled his hair while he fucked them then they'd find out. I would think he's just happy with his (presumably faithful) wife. A different generation, where they could marry a non feminist woman who hadn't been pumped by 200 men before settling for you. I can see why you'd never want to cheat.

 

[cocohot]

You think you can remove a hair piece just like that? You would not be able to tell, even by touching, it's not obvious.

Yeah my mother had known few guys before him.

But still, she dated a prisoner in her teens, and then had a 6 year relationship before she met my father at the age of 23.

I don't think she's ever cheated on my father too, she also has these high ideals and morals about relationships.

She's not very happy with how I treat women, even though I'm barely cheating on anyone right now.

Two of the girls I'm dating know that I haven't decided if it was serious. Just one of them decided that she was my girlfriend, just like that.

Yeah I thought you could remove it just like that because you are always posting about how terrible they are.

And only two men before your father at 23 lol, nowadays it would be more like 80.

Have you told your "girlfriend" you're not committed?

 

[nameless]

They'd find out about his wig though. Ever think that might be a factor?

I think this is absolutely a factor. If I was reduced to a hairpiece I would definitely be on my best behavior with my wife if I was married because she would have me over a barrel.

 

[kj6723]

So no, they would not necessarily find out about his wig. Just like the girls I'm dating don't find out about my hair transplant.

I'm in a bit of a pickle myself regarding my upcoming transplant and a female.

There's a female who's expressed interest in me I'm thinking about pursuing, but she's the daughter of a family friend, so I can't just hook up with her and move on. It's pretty much be in a relationship with her or nothing. But starting up something serious concerns me given that I have a transplant scheduled in January. I'm not sure how I'd hide that....disappear for like a week without telling her where I'm going or what I'm doing, and come back with my head looking weird as sh*t, wearing a hat 100% of the time for the next few months...

smh

 

[Rudiger]

My advice is DO NOT LISTEN TO THIS MAN:

Disappear for a week or two, and she won't notice anything.

I mean jesus christ, any person can see a hair transplant a mile off for several weeks, I don't know if you realise this but couples who are intimate tend to get very close to each other, so when she's right up against his head or waking up beside him, flicking on the light, you don't think she'll notice a f*****g hair transplant?

Fred is right about one thing- do not tell them if you can, it's a very bad idea and they won't ever truly understand.

However, I can't see a way out of it with this, if you want to go out with her then build up that trusting relationship until hair transplant time, then tell her and hope for the best.

The only other option is to hold out until after the hair transplant and then pursue her, however a lot of women don't tend to stay single for that long, so it's a risk.

 

[kj6723]

I really don't see a way out of this without disclosing some measure of my insecurity to her. I'll likely just forego the idea of serious relationships until my scalp has healed up.

If she wasn't a family friend, I'd just hit her up and do my best to keep it casual, but unfortunately that's not an option without likely creating all sorts of inter-family chaos and drama.

 

[shookwun]

order of attraction

Face + physique

Face

Physique

YOU (BALD)



Hope this helps.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I really don't see a way out of this without disclosing some measure of my insecurity to her. I'll likely just forego the idea of serious relationships until my scalp has healed up.

If she wasn't a family friend, I'd just hit her up and do my best to keep it casual, but unfortunately that's not an option without likely creating all sorts of inter-family chaos and drama.

It's really annoying BS that men are not allowed to compensate.

Would you, or most guys you know, leave a woman or lose respect for a woman because she had one or two plastic surgeries such as a nose job, breast implants, etc?

No.

It's also completely arbitrary what's ok and what isn't. We don't bat an eye if someone has laser eye surgery or gets braces. For most people that doesn't even count as cosmetic surgery.

Hair transplant?

"vanity ! wasteful ! be more confident !"