The Cognitive Taxes Of Hair Loss And General Ugliness

[cocohot]

It can be. It depends on the book, actually. This year, a book I really enjoyed working on is supposed to come out. It is about a writer family from your country, mostly famous because of three sisters I admit, I will be proud when it's out. I loved working on it. My name may even be mentionned! Though most of the time it is not. But that is also someting I enjoy. You are working in the dark. May have change a chapter, or just a comma. Nobody knows Even in the company, you are like a ghost: in and out with a pile of papers on your hands. When I was a child I wanted to be restorer of art or entomologist Lol. But I was not gifted for art. I almost entered a school of Stained-glass windows restoration, but was not as romantic as I thought ) One thing is sure, my thing is to work alone,
preferably with the deads (when we republish a classic for instance) and very meticulously.
Oups... seems like I could have been a hit man too ^^

Ever think of writing your own book?

 

[EvilLocks]

I don't like the idea of having spent so much money, but i had no other choice. All I have left to do now is battle this anxiety.

Money well spent, if you ask me. And to put it on the spot; a hair transplant is an investment in your happiness. And as we all know; happiness is priceless. A house is a great investment too, but is it going to make you happy? Probably not. I'd rather spend my money on my happiness first and foremost, then other important investments.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Money well spent, if you ask me. And to put it on the spot; a hair transplant is an investment in your happiness. And as we all know; happiness is priceless. A house is a great investment too, but is it going to make you happy? Probably not. I'd rather spend my money on my happiness first and foremost, then other important investments.

The point was that people with natural hair can spend that money on a house or buying stocks. They have that significant head start.

Financial security and independence actually does make people happy. It reduces the risk of catastrophe. Also, it provides for self satisfaction. The people my age who have savings are often self-righteous about it: "I made better choices ! everybody should be as responsible as me !"

Shookwun works in natural resources. It's an inherently cyclical industry and even very good people can lose their jobs very suddenly.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I understand you. I genuinely have no hobby because hair loss absorbed part of me. I'd love to have hobbies. Too bad my spare, free time is 90% dedicated to thinking about my hair and plans for the future.

Everyday I think about this disease and I push myself to pursue my career objectives. My field and my studies are the only things that make me happy and stop thinking about hair loss: ironically, they are the only thing that will make me able to afford a hair transplant. If I fail, I will fail double.

I don't read anything not related to academics anymore. I don't write nor draw anymore. I find peace in study and in those close ones that still hang out with me. I look like an aging 35 years old but I'm 14 years younger than that: I will remember these people forever because they stayed and still invited me to hang out or pass some time together.

I like you David, like most people in this forum, because we share our feelings here. And many times we have the same feelings and fears: most (if not all) because of this disease.

If you're young and visibly balding (NW3+ or NW2+ Visibly diffusing) with few romantic experiences I have to tell you that it will probably be a very hard ride. I'm sincere about what I think about this. No experience + balding is hard mode in the dating field. I would even compare it to no experience + old age in the job market.

First you have to look for girls in your social circle and social class. Girls outside the circle look for boyfriends in their own circle OR, if theyre slutty enough, through dating apps and in the club. The job market metaphor is useful again:

Let the firm be the girl and you are trying to get hired. Your looks are your competencies and social skills with girls are your work experience.

Many firms only and exclusively hire highly talented interns recommended by their network: these are the top firms (7-10).

Mid tier firms (6-7) look for both recommendations and interns with an extremely good CV not from the network. If you're from the network you may get hired just by showing some key competencies and work experience. If you're not from the network, your competencies must be coupled with a big chunk of work experience in the field: this is the only way to get hired by mid tier firms, which receive a sh*t ton of applications.

Then there are the low tier firms (1-5). They look for interns everywhere and they hold events (read: they get slutty in the club) and market themselves: they need interns. Still, they receive a sh*t ton of applications nonetheless. They just look for competencies. If you lack competencies you don't get hired.

You must build work experience/social skills with girls slowly and steadily if you lack competencies/looks. Generally the majority of people develop social skills with girls in the teenage years (when pretty much everyone is handsome): the first girlfriends, the first sex experiences, the parties et cetera. Those who don't they develop them later, or they get buttfucked by fate: they get bald (ugly) before building these skills.

What I understand is that you got bald before building these skills, and to build these skills you must be youthful looking and girls are not eager to give their pussy to an awkward balding man. They are eager to give their pussy to a youthful looking/handsome awkward man.

Thus you must take a long, ascending bumpy road to build these skills effectively. Start with girls in your network, then slowly build skills. Maybe one day you'll get the Cure and maybe get the girl of your dreams, without the certainty of failure. First you must build some social skills and this will be hard. I believe in you. Be patient and start today.

It's interesting to hear about your professional situation. I don't know much is due to you, your career, and to Italy.

An acquaintance of mine, with awful social skills, learned astronomy in Italy. He claims that it's a huge mafia there, in order to get a good position, or a good grant, you need to be connected to one of four or five powerful people who will vouch for you, and that these people partition the resources. That sounds truly awful, and I don't trust the source as he's an a**h**, but regardless it does seem more plausible in both a small discipline (astronomy) and a declining country (Italy).

As for my situation it is not the same as that of most people here. I think a lot of people here were studs prior to baldness, and they wanted to maintain that level of dominance. I was not. I am from an underprivileged background, I had poor social skills most of my life, I don't have natural beauty and I did not maximize what I had. All I had was smarts which I channeled into a reasonable academic career, some work ethic and some open-mindedness. My health is average.

My hair was receding very slowly throughout my 20s and I first did not notice, and then did nothing about it because I had other (urgent) priorities and less awareness. I grew to care more about looks and women in my 20s and had marginal success at best. When I saw my hairline start to turn into an "M / widow's peak" a couple years ago I began to panic. I did not want to deal with the disfigurement of baldness in addition to all of my other problems.

10 years ago I was somebody who always got fired from jobs, who had poor people skills, who was fat, and who had hair. Now it's the opposite on all counts. I'm a little tired of fighting.

I want to say thank you for your posts. You're a recent arrival but you've raised the mean IQ of the forum.

 

[EvilLocks]

The point was that people with natural hair can spend that money on a house or buying stocks. They have that significant head start.

Financial security and independence actually does make people happy. It reduces the risk of catastrophe. Also, it provides for self satisfaction. The people my age who have savings are often self-righteous about it: "I made better choices ! everybody should be as responsible as me !"

Shookwun works in natural resources. It's an inherently cyclical industry and even very good people can lose their jobs very suddenly.

Yeah but under the circumstances it's money well spent.

 

[DoctorHouse]

It's interesting to hear about your professional situation. I don't know much is due to you, your career, and to Italy.

An acquaintance of mine, with awful social skills, learned astronomy in Italy. He claims that it's a huge mafia there, in order to get a good position, or a good grant, you need to be connected to one of four or five powerful people who will vouch for you, and that these people partition the resources. That sounds truly awful, and I don't trust the source as he's an a**h**, but regardless it does seem more plausible in both a small discipline (astronomy) and a declining country (Italy).

As for my situation it is not the same as that of most people here. I think a lot of people here were studs prior to baldness, and they wanted to maintain that level of dominance. I was not. I am from an underprivileged background, I had poor social skills most of my life, I don't have natural beauty and I did not maximize what I had. All I had was smarts which I channeled into a reasonable academic career, some work ethic and some open-mindedness. My health is average.

My hair was receding very slowly throughout my 20s and I first did not notice, and then did nothing about it because I had other (urgent) priorities and less awareness. I grew to care more about looks and women in my 20s and had marginal success at best. When I saw my hairline start to turn into an "M / widow's peak" a couple years ago I began to panic. I did not want to deal with the disfigurement of baldness in addition to all of my other problems.

10 years ago I was somebody who always got fired from jobs, who had poor people skills, who was fat, and who had hair. Now it's the opposite on all counts. I'm a little tired of fighting.

I want to say thank you for your posts. You're a recent arrival but you've raised the mean IQ of the forum.

David, you obvious understand your circumstance better than all of us. I am constantly fighting aging. I spend lots of money to look younger than I am. Its gets quite expensive and tiresome really. But its my fault for allowing society to put that pressure on myself. I see men my age let themselves go and they are much happier than I am. They don't compare themselves like I do constantly. I want those thoughts turned off in my brain but I can't turn them off.

You can fight the fight but do it at pace that you feel comfortable. You are still young enough to try. I wish I had that on my side. You are going to have to find those rare women who feel personality trumps looks. They have to exist out there. There has to be women versions of Baldhurts who feel they are not good looking enough to compete yet they are very attractive. Those are the women you may have a chance with. If you make them feel special and no one else does, you will have a chance. Once you lean better social skills and how to read people better(body language and facial cues) your fight might be slightly easier. Just remember we all have to constantly fight for what we want or you will lose out to someone who is more ambitious or just genetically gifted.

 

[shookwun]

Money well spent, if you ask me. And to put it on the spot; a hair transplant is an investment in your happiness. And as we all know; happiness is priceless. A house is a great investment too, but is it going to make you happy? Probably not. I'd rather spend my money on my happiness first and foremost, then other important investments.

I need to Invest in myself first before I can be content and happy with everything else.


In the short run it sucks, but I the long run I will be happy about everything moving forward.


However, transplants are a gamble. I have been on finasteride for over four years, and taken steroids in between. With all his experience I determine myself to be a good candidate with very slow loss.


For those with agressive loss, transplants are typically not advisable given the nature of hair loss. We must take in consideration age also.




I will buy a home next year.

 

[hairblues]

Most of the books readers/correctors/rewriters are writers themselves, indeed.
For now, I see a lot of mediocre books... and I don't feel like adding one to the pile
More seriously, to me writing, but above all, publishing a book is not a light thing, I twill not until I am not sure I have something that matters and it feels like a urge to do so. At the moment, I have notes, preparatory work for what could, maybe, someday, become a book.

you can write about all of us crazy people.

 

[cocohot]

Most of the books readers/correctors/rewriters are writers themselves, indeed.
For now, I see a lot of mediocre books... and I don't feel like adding one to the pile
More seriously, to me writing, but above all, publishing a book is not a light thing, I twill not until I am not sure I have something that matters and it feels like a urge to do so. At the moment, I have notes, preparatory work for what could, maybe, someday, become a book.

You could write a book like the underground man but from a female protagonist's perspective. So many books about pissed off misanthropic men, none about women.

 

[cocohot]

I don't think my book would be a novel... I am pretty bad at imaginating things... more like a journal or about the life of someone. I had this neighbor who died and was alone all his life. He was a friend of my parents but not so close, though they were the last one seing him alive at hospital... I don't know why this man, Abilio, is often in my minds. I think I will write a book called Abilio someday, and give an hommage to this man, no woman ever loved, who was an alcoholic and every body forgot about. They not just forgot about him... it is more than that, they never aknowledge his very existence. Me, I remember his smile, his way of walking, his poor life. I saw him every day until he entered the hospital and never went back from it. I know, happy story, right

But, relly, I should not talk about those things. I expose myself to another comparison with Teller !!!

I think Dante is already writing that book on this forum

You could write a polemic from a fictional misanthropic woman's perspective, that wouldn't require much imagination. A skeleton story as a vehicle for her rants and despair.

 

[Rudiger]

Funny you're mentioning Human by the Human League.

It's one of the my favorite songs.

(It's a song about cheating and how it's OK sometimes).

I think I've discovered my housewife f***-to song.

 

[Bklyn_23]

Funny you're mentioning Human by the Human League.

It's one of the my favorite songs.

(It's a song about cheating and how it's OK sometimes).

That song has one of the best instrumental openings ever imo. Such a beautiful sound. Great song.

 

[Roberto_72]

The first time I visited a hair transplant surgeon he had this poster in the lobby:

"Why buy a scooter when with the same money you can have HAIR again?"

The first thing that came to my mind was that the people with better genes than mine had both the hair and the scooter.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Sometimes I wonder if I wasn't balding would some other insecurity take over - like my weak chin of the bags beneath my eyes. Am I always destined to nit-pick any and all weaknesses that I stumble upon?

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Sometimes I wonder if I wasn't balding would some other insecurity take over - like my weak chin of the bags beneath my eyes. Am I always destined to nit-pick any and all weaknesses that I stumble upon?

I wish I didn't have to waste so much time learning about hair, skin, women, fashion, etc. It's fundamentally uninteresting stuff, peacocking is a zero-sum game that creates no value, I engage in this nonsense only to conform to societal demands.

There are far more interesting subjects to learn about: history, art, culture, science, etc.

I want to reach a point where I look good enough to live a happy life, and I can move on.

 

[Exodus2011]

God knows David

I f*****g miss the days of not caring about looks and just generally being secure

Most I did was comb my hair in the morning and had a soul at ease because my exterior matched my personality (looking young)

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Perhaps there's the early stages of being young and happy - the middle stages where we fight the hair loss and ageing - and then there is the final stage of acceptance.

 

[Exodus2011]

Perhaps there's the early stages of being young and happy - the middle stages where we fight the hair loss and ageing - and then there is the final stage of acceptance.

my early stage ended at 20 (fully bald at 20). 17 in another sense (started balding then)

 

[JohnsonDDG]

my early stage ended at 20 (fully bald at 20). 17 in another sense (started balding then)

So you lost your hair in three years?

That is very aggressive.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

It's curious. I never cared about my looks or girls either. I didn't understand why my mates bothered so much about practicing sports or asking girls out. I didn't really care about any of that. I never even asked a girl out, nor ever thought about doing it. All I cared about was studying, reading and practicing my hobbies. Then people started to make fun of me because of my appearance and my hair loss. Before that, I never gave a f***, I never bothered anyone and I didn't understand why they coudln't live by the "live and let live rule". I started to become sensitive about my appearance only because of the way people treated me. Now I'm literally obsessed with hair loss and can't even look at myself in the mirror.

You sound like a really good guy.

The world needs more Dante's and less Chad's.