The Frequent "official" Origin Of My Recent Failures With Women

[CaptainForehead]

my Father was hot stuff

Bit creepy there hairblues.

 

[hairblues]

Be careful hairblues ... feminists will cut you if they find out you said that there are biological differences between how men and women's brains work.

Feminism is a huge tent of thought, there is a lot of feminists who believe and write about what I just wrote.
The modern day campus feminists are not speaking for everyone.

 

[blackg]

Feminism is a huge tent of thought...

I will admit that some feminist give me a huge tent.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

I will admit that some feminist give me a huge tent.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I guess it depends on the context. I'd accept a dislike if I was being facetious or intentionally ignorant for the point of satire, oddly those never happen, it's only for simple disagreements and being petty.

I don't think I've ever used the dislike button, I feel it chips away at one's soul.

I don't think I've ever deliberately used the function. I might have once or twice due to clicking the wrong button by accident.

When I saw it added to the forum I figured it could weed out the weak minded. Those who use the dislike function are indicating mental weakness.

That was my suspicion at first, and it's been confirmed as people either use it for aggression or use it in the Brotzu thread.

 

[Xander94]

I don't think I've ever deliberately used the function. I might have once or twice due to clicking the wrong button by accident.

When I saw it added to the forum I figured it could weed out the weak minded. Those who use the dislike function are indicating mental weakness.

That was my suspicion at first, and it's been confirmed as people either use it for aggression or use it in the Brotzu thread.

 

[DoctorHouse]

I don't think I've ever deliberately used the function. I might have once or twice due to clicking the wrong button by accident.

When I saw it added to the forum I figured it could weed out the weak minded. Those who use the dislike function are indicating mental weakness.

That was my suspicion at first, and it's been confirmed as people either use it for aggression or use it in the Brotzu thread.

I have never used the dislike button(that I can remember) but in the cases I got dislikes they both were for just questions I asked. I think some people abuse the privilege but it just represents real life experiences. Not everyone is going to like you no matter how nice you are to them.

 

[hairblues]

I have never used the dislike button(that I can remember) but in the cases I got dislikes they both were for just questions I asked. I think some people abuse the privilege but it just represents real life experiences. Not everyone is going to like you no matter how nice you are to them.

Why be 'nice' to people who don't like you? Being polite is not the same as being 'nice'.
That is more about the need to be liked than what person may actually think of the other person--thats how i see it at least..It can come off to the other person to be very disingeous--and you may garner more resentment.
If it is obvious someone does not like you--just leave them be.

 

[hairblues]

LOL what is this??

 

[hairblues]

I would not call @Dante92 or @WhitePolarBear mentally weak...I mean I might call them many things--but mentally weak is not one of them and I have like 99% of my dislikes from them--it's like 'meh'.
I may just be immune at this point they don't bug me.

I will say this when one of the two of them actually 'like' one of my posts (on the rare occasion)--i actually appreciate those 'likes' because they seem very authentic, honest in spite of how they may see me 'generally' speaking and I respect that.

 

[DoctorHouse]

Why be 'nice' to people who don't like you? Being polite is not the same as being 'nice'.
That is more about the need to be liked than what person may actually think of the other person--thats how i see it at least..It can come off to the other person to be very disingeous--and you may garner more resentment.
If it is obvious someone does not like you--just leave them be.

I am just saying sometimes when you do something nice with a positive intention(being polite), not everyone will receive it as a positive intention. I was thinking more in reference to my career so I guess it can vary in different social interactions. Basically, I tend to avoid negative people so I really try my best to leave those people be but sometimes they like power or control and they come after you even if you try to leave them alone. Regardless, I will continue to just "like" the posts that I can relate to and if I don't just let it stand for other people to "like". Most of the behavior that goes on here is totally understandable as I was alot like many of the posters when I was their age. I can always remember how "looks" was the most important thing on my mind. And although I was no male model, I always wanted my significant other to be gorgeous. I realized I was always searching out of my league that no wonder I had a hard time finding that special one but when I did unfortunately I had nothing in common with them.

 

[SmoothSailing]

If I like something I'll like it, if I particularly don't like something I'll dislike it. Am I using it wrong?

Dislike doesn't mean spam, or I dislike you, or don't post that, it means I particularly dislike what you wrote. Normally only use it when someone uses shitty tactics to argue points.

As you said David, anger is an important emotion, so are criticisms.

 

[hairblues]

What my experience with women has taught me is that it is very difficult to find someone you're compatible with.

And being compatible certainly doesn't mean having all the same interest, the same personality-type, working in the same field, and what not.

It just means that spending time with that person makes you happy, and often it cannot even be explained rationally.

You just "get" each other, the conversation flows, the other person can know exactly what you have in mind by a simple facial expression.

Even if the people who don't have much experience with women will understand what I mean because they probably have this with their closest friends.

You meet that kind of person and then you know you have great foundations to build a healthy relationship.

And as I've said, those persons will be rarer than you think. Think about your best friends too, how many people will you meet in your life with who you will have such a great connection.

It's sad how so many people think that they can get a DIY partner: "He/she has to be like this, this tall, has to have ambition, must like cats, oh and he plays an instrument, he must like to cook etc."

They have it backwards. They forget that they'll always be dealing with another human being and no matter how hard they try, they'll never find the exact model they're looking for in a catalogue.

I think what you said is very valid and very true in your 20s..

I think depending what you do professionally and your education this can change over time though....and not just with your partner but even the friends you keep.

I have grown out of sooooooo many friends I had in my 20s...your life changes, your perspective changes what is important to you changes...

I am not saying this will happen to you, it may not (probably not from what you revealed about you GF and yourself) ...but sometimes compatibility in life style and beliefs becomes very important. I think that is why a lot of people divorce.

 

[hairblues]

I am just saying sometimes when you do something nice with a positive intention(being polite), not everyone will receive it as a positive intention. I was thinking more in reference to my career so I guess it can vary in different social interactions. Basically, I tend to avoid negative people so I really try my best to leave those people be but sometimes they like power or control and they come after you even if you try to leave them alone. Regardless, I will continue to just "like" the posts that I can relate to and if I don't just let it stand for other people to "like". Most of the behavior that goes on here is totally understandable as I was alot like many of the posters when I was their age. I can always remember how "looks" was the most important thing on my mind. And although I was no male model, I always wanted my significant other to be gorgeous. I realized I was always searching out of my league that no wonder I had a hard time finding that special one but when I did unfortunately I had nothing in common with them.

I was reluctant to quote this because you are so nice and I don't want to put you on spot at all but I found this intriguing and I genuinely wanted to ask you to expand on it if you could.

I always got the impression (perhaps wrongly) that you validate a lot of the men on here on their view of women and themselves but when i read the above it sounds more like you are wanting them not to repeat your own dating mistakes (which reads as if you went for women's looks being better than your own if not mistaken).

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I have never used the dislike button(that I can remember) but in the cases I got dislikes they both were for just questions I asked. I think some people abuse the privilege but it just represents real life experiences. Not everyone is going to like you no matter how nice you are to them.

It is like real life, but there's a reason I don't use it. I try and explain what I mean, or I don't bother saying it.

I'm not surprised that you don't use the dislike function. All of the posters that I consider the most mature tend not to use it.

Anyways, time to move on to more interesting topics.

 

[blackg]

What my experience with women has taught me is that it is very difficult to find someone you're compatible with.

And being compatible certainly doesn't mean having all the same interest, the same personality-type, working in the same field, and what not.

It just means that spending time with that person makes you happy, and often it cannot even be explained rationally.

You just "get" each other, the conversation flows, the other person can know exactly what you have in mind by a simple facial expression.

Even if the people who don't have much experience with women will understand what I mean because they probably have this with their closest friends.

You meet that kind of person and then you know you have great foundations to build a healthy relationship.

And as I've said, those persons will be rarer than you think. Think about your best friends too, how many people will you meet in your life with who you will have such a great connection.

It's sad how so many people think that they can get a DIY partner: "He/she has to be like this, this tall, has to have ambition, must like cats, oh and he plays an instrument, he must like to cook etc."

They have it backwards. They forget that they'll always be dealing with another human being and no matter how hard they try, they'll never find the exact model they're looking for in a catalogue.

Well said, Freddo.
It's really not all about ticking boxes.

Some times you really do just click with a certain person.
Noone, bar universal karma, can explain why this happens.

 

[hairblues]

Well said, Freddo.
It's really not all about ticking boxes.

Some times you really do just click with a certain person.
Noone, bar universal karma, can explain why this happens.

pheromones.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

How to squander the gift of great hair, a 4.65/10 leads by example:

 

[hairblues]

Be careful hairblues ... feminists will cut you if they find out you said that there are biological differences between how men and women's brains work.

I'm curious did you ever read or listen to Camile Paglia?--She was very impressive to me in my college years. I don't agree across board but I generally agree and like her views..i agree with a lot that christina hoff summers says-- not everything I think some her numbers are strongly debatable (and not very interesting to me) but a lot of her general sentiments and ideas.
We are definitely not all defined by the modern day campus scene--same with liberalism.

 

[CaptainForehead]

I'm curious did you ever read or listen to Camile Paglia?--She was very impressive to me in my college years. I don't agree across board but I generally agree and like her views..i agree with a lot that christina hoff summers says-- not everything I think some her numbers are strongly debatable (and not very interesting to me) but a lot of her general sentiments and ideas.
We are definitely not all defined by the modern day campus scene--same with liberalism.

No, never heard of those two.

I realize that not all of you are defined by the modern day campus scene, but those people have something akin to a religious fervor and have a tendency to attack anyone who doesn't conform to their views.