The Frequent "official" Origin Of My Recent Failures With Women

[Patrick_Bateman]

I don't believe in the 'women are attracted to assholes' view. As David says its largely irrelevant. But being a pushover, or nonassertive is something I've had to, and continue to, work on because I believe it's important for attraction. Being more dominant.


I've also been complimented on a few dates for being chill (since fixing my social anxiety I'm chill as f*** on the actual date, anxious before and after). I think this does nothing for attraction but increases her enjoyment\relaxation and thus increases chances of a next date.

I also think that being funny helps in this way, as well as helping with attraction.

Red pill note: these things can only help you get looksmatched girls, looks trump all.

Girls want to date good looking guys, good looking guys are often assholes because they can get away with it. Self proclaimed "nice guys" mistake being an a**h** as the sole factor for getting women, when in reality the only thing that matters is being good looking. Being an a**h** is just a side effect of being good looking.

 

[Joan]

I think I'm genuinely kind and caring, and certainly nicer than Trump.

I think so too, David, along with a class act.

 

[hairblues]

Girls want to date good looking guys, good looking guys are often assholes because they can get away with it. Self proclaimed "nice guys" mistake being an a**h** as the sole factor for getting women, when in reality the only thing that matters is being good looking. Being an a**h** is just a side effect of being good looking.

Yeah but most people learn to 'see' past hotness to the 'a**h**-ry' ...I think.
I think it can actually work against people who are hot at times. Even in same sex friendships or getting to know new people. "he look like a jerk" "she looks like a b**ch" then sometimes you get to know them and they turn out to be nice.

 

[CaptainForehead]

I don't believe in the 'women are attracted to assholes' view. As David says its largely irrelevant.

Judging by the response of women to TV characters, I have to say, I think being an a**h** does make you go up in the eyes of women. I saw the S2 panel discussion on iZombie, and there the women were clamoring for Blaine to become the romantic interest of Liv. The dude while not ugly, cannot be said to be handsome. Same with Spike. (David will get these references).

 

[hairblues]

Judging by the response of women to TV characters, I have to say, I think being an a**h** does make you go up in the eyes of women. I saw the S2 panel discussion on iZombie, and there the women were clamoring for Blaine to become the romantic interest of Liv. The dude while not ugly, cannot be said to be handsome. Same with Spike. (David will get these references).

that's fiction and Hollywood manipulation it's the idea that a character is redeemable--to be honest it makes a great 'hero' journey though if you are writing..the more messed up a character is or the more problems they have to over come the more you have to work with--where if someone is 'perfect' you won't have much to make them learn or obstacles to overcome--there is no evolution. Every story the person is somehow changed from beginning to end...the more dynamic yet convincing the change the better the story and the more involved the reader/watcher is, emotionally invested...so young girls are going to see the anti-hero as the most evolved character over time. they are probably subtly hinting early on that the bad guy has a heart--and will add more and more...Spike from Buffy was a good example of this.

I think most people should know that is just fiction by early 20s (hopefully). some women are naracasicsts (maybe not the right word maybe misplaced hopeful romantic? Idk) so they do think they can get a man to change for 'her' over time..She will be 'different'. I don't know if men are like this though. I think men see the flaws and if she is hot are like 'well shes hot so let me put up with this for a while'.

Thats why I have said on here in past IF a woman 'wants' a man for money--its better she goes with that guy otherwise she will make some poor working guy suffer the rest of his life he is not giving her what she wants. You cant really ever change the core of people.

 

[CaptainForehead]

You might like them and it will give you a more rounded view of 'feminism' and how varied it is.

Camila Paglia is like the anti-feminist, feminist. Its basically points out that some feminism schools of thoughts and actions boarders on being a victim.
Actual real authentic idea of feminism in my mind or interpretation is NOT to be a victim.
Their is another woman you might like I cant think of her name, she is English. She did a debate with Milo actually and she has a similar out look as well although more traditional in some areas.
to me the message is don't be a 'victim', there are a lot of legitimate victims..it becomes 'crying wolf' a lot of modern campus feminists and liberals do this (probably going on with other side as well I don't know--but I sense it's a 20 something generation thing more than a specific ideology).
If you are outraged by everything it's diluting the real sh*t. If tons of women report men telling them they are pretty as a 'sex harassment' it fucks up the women who are legitimately being sexually harassed and in danger.
I was in college and I had a very short top on and a guy who I did not know from a hole in the wall called me a sl*t as I walked by him in cafeteria..I turned around and put him on blast--"I heard you dickhead" ...he acted like 'so what' but two weeks later he came up to me quietly and apologized he said he does not know why he said it. We are actually still friends to this day ironically lol..he was just frustrated I think and he thought I was hot but it annoyed him for whatever reason and he expressed it in the WRONG way.
But I never would have thought--let me report him to the administration for sexual harassment and get him booted out of school.
Not comparing all sexual harassment, some is legitimate or repeated daily and then some is dangerous and harmful.
But I think you understand what I mean. You have to weigh a situation and be able to speak up for yourself.

I will check her out
http://www.newcriterion.com/articles.cfm/The-future-of-feminism-8669
She also fights back against this anti-male backlash in a speech at the Munk Debate in Toronto by astutely attacking the question “Are Men Obsolete”? Her opening statement, “If men are obsolete, then women will soon be extinct,” shows her willingness to depart from the feminist dogma that says women can do it all and that men are dolts who are unnecessary.

 

[CaptainForehead]

I think most people should know that is just fiction by early 20s (hopefully). some women are naracasicsts (maybe not the right word maybe misplaced hopeful romantic? Idk) so they do think they can get a man to change for 'her' over time..She will be 'different'.

It's not about fiction or getting the man to change. An exchange took place in the aforementioned panel. Rob Thomas said he would not be able to get over the fact that Blaine murdered children for brains. Diane, the other co-creator said people (ie women) don't care.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Girls want to date good looking guys, good looking guys are often assholes because they can get away with it. Self proclaimed "nice guys" mistake being an a**h** as the sole factor for getting women, when in reality the only thing that matters is being good looking. Being an a**h** is just a side effect of being good looking.

Truth.

Judging by the response of women to TV characters, I have to say, I think being an a**h** does make you go up in the eyes of women. I saw the S2 panel discussion on iZombie, and there the women were clamoring for Blaine to become the romantic interest of Liv. The dude while not ugly, cannot be said to be handsome. Same with Spike. (David will get these references).

In terms of looks

Riley > Angel > Spike > > Wesley > Giles > The Mayor > Xander > Adam > The Master > The Trio > Oz, the first three or four are good looking in my opinion, good f*****g luck getting a woman to acknowledge your existence if this guy is in the room:

and,
Major > Blaine > Ravi > Malcolm, I think Blaine is above average, though if someone posted his pic on this forum, this forum which overrates men and underrates women, I bet he'd get a 8/10. The makeup he wears on the show isn't real, so to long-term viewers it won't detract from his looks, they'll just see his bone structure, etc.

That said, however hot he is, he is in a lower league than Ally Michalka (plays Peyton) by a substantial margin, as are 99% of the men in the world. She's in the top handful of women in the world that I'd love to f***.

I don't understand why people are shipping Liv and Blaine, seriously? lol. I think Blaine works with Peyton because they're not a good match. She's a "good" girl who does everything right, the girl we knew in high school who was always on time, and had 98% on all her exams, edited the yearbook, and is now an adult. Blaine is a huge a**h** and wings it on charisma, unscrupulousness, and ability to manipulate people. He can corrupt her. It's scary. Oh my

Liv and Blaine I don't get. Major was boring because he was too good, fans don't like characters who are "too good", as was the case with Riley in Buffy. Riley became interesting when he developed a vampire feeding addiction. Major became interesting when he became a zombie. Prior to that the only thing interesting about him was that his dog's name was Minor.

Which did give me an idea, if I get a dog I'm naming him Goliath.

Returning back to your actual f*****g point (lol), I think you've made a valid one. Women don't like vanilla. But that's in the context of a TV show, does it apply in real life?

ETA: Posters here may take comfort from the fact that a rapidly balding man like David Anders is apparently a sex symbol to some iZombie fans.

 

[rclark]

I guess it depends on the context. I'd accept a dislike if I was being facetious or intentionally ignorant for the point of satire, oddly those never happen, it's only for simple disagreements and being petty.

I don't think I've ever used the dislike button, I feel it chips away at one's soul.

Yet you insult people and fight with people on the board all the time.

To be honest, a dislike doesn't bother me at all. And I would rather have that then to read
someone's stupid opinion of why they disliked a post.

 

[hairblues]

It's not about fiction or getting the man to change. An exchange took place in the aforementioned panel. Rob Thomas said he would not be able to get over the fact that Blaine murdered children for brains. Diane, the other co-creator said people (ie women) don't care.

I know but I think she means as viewers.
They are talking as show creators for the viewers.

But i am saying the psychology behind it...men route for bad men that show goodness as well.
How many people love Jessie from Breaking Bad? a lot of people because he may do bad sh*t but he cares about little kids and women.
What about Walter himself? How much do people forgive his horrific deeds because he has glimpses of humanity you route for him in spite of being the ultimate bad guy.

 

[rclark]

I have so many and I think all of them are fred and dante if not mistaken.

but I always take that as a sign I must have said something 'right'

Maybe FredTheDutchman? Who is actually Fred, and a clone with e Petri dish and sheep?

Haven't seen that guy in a while.


Think Fred might have come back, he's now Freda.. LOL.

 

[rclark]

I know but I think she means as viewers.
They are talking as show creators for the viewers.

But i am saying the psychology behind it...men route for bad men that show goodness as well.
How many people love Jessie from Breaking Bad? a lot of people because he may do bad sh*t but he cares about little kids and women.
What about Walter himself? How much do people forgive his horrific deeds because he has glimpses of humanity you route for him in spite of being the ultimate bad guy.

@buckthorn loves him. That's one person. Not sure if he makes meth in the basement or not.

But I do know this! He uses the word b**ch constantly around here! It's offensive!

 

[SmoothSailing]

I know but I think she means as viewers.
They are talking as show creators for the viewers.

But i am saying the psychology behind it...men route for bad men that show goodness as well.
How many people love Jessie from Breaking Bad? a lot of people because he may do bad sh*t but he cares about little kids and women.
What about Walter himself? How much do people forgive his horrific deeds because he has glimpses of humanity you route for him in spite of being the ultimate bad guy.

Jesse: good guy, I like.

Walter: piece of sh*t, I hate.

Being an a**h** is not equal to crime. Many criminals are likely decent lads. I hate assholes. I can of course enjoy them as characters, maybe even route for them (Archer!), but I never like being around assholes.

 

[hairblues]

I will check her out
http://www.newcriterion.com/articles.cfm/The-future-of-feminism-8669
She also fights back against this anti-male backlash in a speech at the Munk Debate in Toronto by astutely attacking the question “Are Men Obsolete”? Her opening statement, “If men are obsolete, then women will soon be extinct,” shows her willingness to depart from the feminist dogma that says women can do it all and that men are dolts who are unnecessary.

Men are definitely not obsolete. Men are fantastic.

I agree partially with that critics writings but she is editorializing way too much toward the end it seems to prove her own points..It's great if you can google articles from Paglia herself if she interests you.

Jesse: good guy, I like.

Walter: piece of sh*t, I hate.

Being an a**h** is not equal to crime. Many criminals are likely decent lads. I hate assholes. I can of course enjoy them as characters, maybe even route for them (Archer!), but I never like being around assholes.

I agree with you--in real life assholes suck to be around.
Fiction is fiction.

 

[hairblues]

Maybe FredTheDutchman? Who is actually Fred, and a clone with e Petri dish and sheep?

Haven't seen that guy in a while.


Think Fred might have come back, he's now Freda.. LOL.

I always thought Fred Dutch and Db was same person. They posted in a very similar style and FTD came after DB had left for while then when Db came back FTD went away.

 

[rclark]

I always thought Fred Dutch and Db was same person. They posted in a very similar style and FTD came after DB had left for while then when Db came back FTD went away.

They are the same person! Of course.

Maybe I should take a picture of myself, and draw black lines around it, nobody would know. I would call myself, Rich the Martian!



Sometimes I think BreakingBald is buckthorn. But, then again, we never know!

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Re: Breaking Bad, Buffy

1) Walter White's popularity was due to a lot of men being able to project on him as a power fantasy. The fact he looks like an everyman is part of it, he's also an everyman at the start of the show. He states in the first or second episode that his income is 43,000/year, that's just about the median income for an American man. Deliberate writing choice. He's also average height and build.

Yet, he's actually extremely intelligent, only he underachieved, partly due to making poor decisions. That's how a lot of American men see themselves, I see it more now that I'm in my 30s. A lot of people had dreams in their 20s, and many of them settled into mediocrity as their dreams grew narrower and narrower every year due to their lack of achievement, lack of success, lack of luck, lack of drive, poor decisions, poor health, et cetera until finally hey have no dreams left at all other than the desire to die and escape their misery.

Walter White had all of that. He was a school teacher, but he knew a friend whom if he had stayed in business with him, he'd be a millionaire, that's true of a lot of people. White has an idiot son. That's not his fault, that's just the sort of bad luck that happens to some people that can derail life. He has erectile dysfunction. He has cancer. Everything is going badly for him. Life was just going to be on autopilot for him until it ended, he had no will left. He had nothing to live for, his dreams were gone.

And for a few years, due to his own decision making and talent and finally some luck, he acquired purpose and opportunity and he began to make money and be a player. He went from being invisible, to having other people acknowledge his existence, and even venerating him as a leader. He rose the ranks. His talent was unleashed and appreciated and rewarded by the world.

It's a true power fantasy, it speaks to the crushed dreams of underachieving American men, but at least a well-written, well-acted, and well-directed fantasy, and therefore compares favourably to Marvel's Civil War.

I didn't quite get why people hated Skyler though.

2) It's often said that there are no rules to good writing. It is also often said that the most important rule for a good film is that there be a good character arc*. The best films have great character arc's such as the Godfather, Amour, or very recently, Logan.

Spike had an absolutely splendid arc in Buffy, and I think that likely contributed to his personality. When he emerged in season 2 he was a static, sociopathic, cool villain. He had killed two slayers before. He had his girlfriend Drusilla and he didn't take sh*t from nobody, it's why he killed the chosen one. When he killed the chosen one it was shocking, because all the vampires worshipped him, so it might Spike seem especially badass.

He continues with this, taking over Halloween, almost killing Buffy, he tried to corrupt Angel, and so on that's who he is and ... he slowly evolves. In the season finale he says he likes manchester united and doesn't want the world to end. A season or so later, he has a dream of Buffy which makes him realize he has a crush on her --- that's happened to many of us. He tries to get into her good graces but can't because of his nature. There's a chip put in his brain which can be seen as a metaphor for anti-depressants or coping mechanisms, it works for some time but causes side effects so he has to stop. Eventually he rapes Buffy so he realizes he needs a major change, he fights to get his soul, and then he suffers for some time as he recalls the errors of his ways.

Major character arc right there.

*2014's Nightcrawler, starring Jake Gylenhall, is an example of a good movie without a character arc. However, it has a narrative arc.

 

[blackg]

I can of course enjoy them as characters, maybe even route for them (Archer!), but I never like being around assholes.

Isn't the expression "root" for them?

 

[CaptainForehead]

In terms of looks

Riley > Angel > Spike > > Wesley > Giles > The Mayor > Xander > Adam > The Master > The Trio > Oz, t


Major > Blaine > Ravi > Malcolm,

Disagree with your ratings.

Angel > Westley > Riley > Giles > Spike

Outside of the Buffyverse, can you really see James Marsters as a romantic lead? While Denisof would be an absolute slayer.

And
Ravi > Major > Blaine

If you can overlook the fact that Ravi is not white, he has quite masculine features. Plus he is tall. Dem eyebrows. Deeper voice. On an iZombie panel where he was next to Major, Major looked like a child. Ravi has a Zachary Levy thing going on (hope you've liked Chuck). I just hate that they've made Ravi into a wuss on the show. Like Kunal's character on BBT. Brown man discrimination.

 

[CaptainForehead]

A lot of people had dreams in their 20s, and many of them settled into mediocrity as their dreams grew narrower and narrower every year due to their lack of achievement, lack of success, lack of luck, lack of drive, poor decisions, poor health, et cetera until finally hey have no dreams left at all other than the desire to die and escape their misery.

Goddamn, that is depressing, and motivational at the same time.

Also, yes, I love Walter because of the power fantasy. Loved LOVED the finale shootout scene.

BTW, did Walter have erectile dysfunction?