The Frequent "official" Origin Of My Recent Failures With Women

[Xander94]

Xander you sound intelligent and well schooled (I'm assuming from what you write)

What kind of profession are you in or seeking to be in ?

Im a software engineer and make good money for european and probably american standards.

It's really incel job. No socializing and certainly not with females.

Bartenders and waitors are probably happier.

 

[hairblues]

Im a software engineer and make good money for european and probably american standards.

It's really incel job. No socializing and certainly not with females.

wow that is great profession--i think if not mistaken PJ has mentioned he is in similar.

Maybe you can eventually move to USA or Canada or somewhere that is more diversity in looks.

I know you mentioned at least your Mother so I know its hard to leave family to live outside country.

 

[Xander94]

wow that is great profession--i think if not mistaken PJ has mentioned he is in similar.

Maybe you can eventually move to USA or Canada or somewhere that is more diversity in looks.

I know you mentioned at least your Mother so I know its hard to leave family to live outside country.

I already left my family back in Greece. Sad thing is I don't even feel my family close to me. I feel only loneliness and chilling sensation. Gym helps but Im afraid finasteride pushed me over.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

I already left my family back in Greece. Sad thing is I don't even feel my family close to me. I feel only loneliness and chilling sensation. Gym helps but Im afraid finasteride pushed me over.

Xander, do what I'm doing and take a break. You're sounding suicidal and that's not good for anybody. Go do something else.

It may be that Scandinavia is a poor spot for you. For whatever it's worth, I get a paucity of matches where I am now, whereas I got dozens of matches very quickly in both Los Angeles and New York. It f*****g sucks. Long-term, you might consider moving.

But I think for the next few months you might do best following my lead (granted I'm biased) on focusing on the non-women aspects of life.

 

[hairblues]

I already left my family back in Greece. Sad thing is I don't even feel my family close to me. I feel only loneliness and chilling sensation. Gym helps but Im afraid finasteride pushed me over.

It causes depression?

 

[hairblues]

Sorry to hear that. My advice to you is to focus on your work and hobbies. A guy just gosthed me after 2 dates! First time ever. Must be my getting old! I am watching Fargo season 3 to forget how cruel life can be. After 2 ep I am over it.

Twin Peaks starts soon--take some solace in that lol.

Been into Better Call Saul lately and The Leftovers (which is like kind of like an acid trip).

 

[blackg]

I don't think a lot of guys are built as weak as they think. Men are not built in the way they were in the past due to job choices lifestyle etc etc . I don't care if your a personal trainer and in the gym all day there is no way you are as strong as a dock worker of the past , you may be more aesthetic but it's a totally different strain of muscle.

My grandfather is 5'6 and was a landscape gardener and never went in the gym in his life but recently I saw a picture of him when he was 40, you rarely see men built like that nowadays. No one would of said he was an over compensating manlet because regardless over height he looked more manly then 9/10 of modern day gym warriors

The best physiques I see from occupation are male hair dressers.
Those guys are built!

 

[SmoothSailing]

Of course they didn't handle it well but if you think masculinity is any thing like it was in the past then I don't know what world your living in. You can keep deflecting all you want but modern society doesn't breed men / leaders

Boys are raised mostly by women. I think this is a huge problem for society.

 

[hairblues]

Don't know why the guy is playing dead with me... He seemed to like me, even call me for 6 hours the other day... I thought m'en were more simple !

Hard truth?
They are simple, I am sorry to say this to you.
When they want you they want you and they are like a dog with a bone...just ask these guys when they like someone.
They would pee on your leg if they could when they really want you. (metaphor--well, sometimes)
He probably liked you but is 'looking' for 'something'...this happens with some people don't take it personal..he may not even know what it is.
Just go to next one--and know that it's okay to have these brief interactions, they are not meaningless--especially you are a writer that is the best stuff. That shitty feeling you have right now--man it's the best for creativity.

 

[hairblues]

Going to dress white and smoke cigarettes after cigarettes.

The best face on TV ..Hands down..not even joking would love to paint that face.
Great character I miss her on that show.

 

[hairblues]

I agree with you and I usually take rejected pretty well ... But going from two super pleasant dates, nights on the phone (WE are talking 6h!!) to not answering a simple text anymore was a first for me. Plus, I just remembered I have hairline. f*** life! What's wrong with the World, Mama/people living like they ain't got no mamas.Lol

Some people attach and detach in a blink of an eye..Unfortunately they are usually very interesting, charismatic people so it 'feels' like you lost something special..but really you didn't.

They just feed off people--like incubus/sucubus lol.

 

[hairblues]

If you think about it, he leftovered me. Time to join the cig secte!

View attachment 52985

I miss cigarettes. f*****g almost 20 years and I still miss them.
nothing like a cigarette and booze.

 

[hairblues]

I see what ya mean ^^ It's not really like I will like I lost something spécial, though I think ghosting people is really bad! My confidence was not so good to begin with.
Anyway.

Well what i think happens is the modern way of communicating is instant so it does something to the pleasure center of the brain 'reward'...so if that person is doing that and they 'ghost'...it probably at least temporarily feels like abandonment or withdrawal..loss..
It's messing temporarily with your brain chemistry. Not really about 'him'...I think maybe.
You got used to him.
I don't know if that made sense the way I wrote it but I think it's the modern communication creates an attached feeling and then a loss feeling. So when it is someone you like it feels even more intense.

 

[blackg]

I agree with you and I usually take rejection pretty well ... But going from two super pleasant dates, nights on the phone (WE are talking 6h!!) to not answering a simple text anymore was a first for me. Plus, I just remembered I have hairloss. f*** life! What's wrong with the World, Mama/people living like they ain't got no mamas.Lol

With respect to hairblues, what she said regarding male behaviour is not totally true across the male spectrum.

In the early stages, at least.. the more I like a woman the more I totally play dead.
It's called playing defence, and I know I am speaking for some other men as well.
The neurotic ones!

Give it some thought.

 

[hairblues]

With respect to hairblues, what she said regarding male behaviour is not totally true across the male spectrum.

In the early stages, at least.. the more I like a woman the more I totally play dead.
It's called playing defence, and I know I am speaking for some other men as well.
The neurotic ones!

Give it some thought.

No offense lol but if you are playing dead with a woman who likes you and you like her then that sounds more like social anxiety.

@Pasbrillantebrunette
My favorite episode of Sex in the City is the "post it note' episode...here is a clip...her boyfriend broke up with her on a post it note. "I cant, I'm sorry, Don't hate me"
Ghosting reminds me of this.

 

[CaptainForehead]

Had the worst day ever today. Extremely depressed my manager made very negative comments on my work, I feel everything is cope. It's f*****g over I wish I was still bluepilled prideful delusional loner. Making an effort to find a woman was the worst mistake ever it made me even more depressed.

Sorry to hear about your bad day Xander. I've had work troubles and I know first hand how demoralizing it can be when your superior makes negative comments.

Which country are you in?

 

[CaptainForehead]

They would pee on your leg if they could when they really want you. (metaphor--well, sometimes)

So that's what hairblues is into.

 

[SmoothSailing]

No offense lol but if you are playing dead with a woman who likes you and you like her then that sounds more like social anxiety.

All these "games" wreck my head. I don't play dead or anything. I just text/ring back whenever I get to it without thought. Otherwise I just over think it and annoy myself. And I don't think into it (or try my best) if she takes ages to respond etc. I just overthink everything so I just don't think about it at all.

This is random but I'm similar in traffic. If I start trying to work out the fastest lane I'll spend the whole time in overdrive trying to figure it out exhausting myself. So I just pick a lane and forget about going faster.

 

[Xander94]

Sorry to hear about your bad day Xander. I've had work troubles and I know first hand how demoralizing it can be when your superior makes negative comments.

Which country are you in?

It's over for me didnt pass the tinder test. 6 months and not even replies.

 

[GornMyson]

Boys are raised mostly by women. I think this is a huge problem for society.

Everyone of us has a father, very few of us have dads and even then a lot of modern dads molly coddle.