Disfigured Man Discovers Looks-matching: Big Think

[Rudiger]

Imagine this scenario: A girl you're extremely attracted to sits next to you at a bar and says hello. The conversation isn't really flowing and she get's shy and turns red. But, she is obviously into you. Would you care about the fact that she is shy? Of course you wouldn't.

So now red pill theory thinks that males and females are of the same mindset?! Riiiight. That only contradicts about 95% of the rest of it, but when it suits- "You think the exact same as women do!".

Males are clearly the instigator, for many reasons, but to boil it down as simply as possible, we'll gladly sleep with as many as possible, we'll even lower our normal standards to sleep with more. Women try to be more picky because they tend to want security as well as an attractive hot screw (difficult balancing act indeed).

Unless a woman is dripping horny for someone she can gladly not put herself out there, women can go ages without sex and it may leave them frustrated here and there but it still won't make them desperate. Males cannot do the same thing, and we are constantly ready to forgive a woman for shyness or awkwardness, this is not the same thing.

 

[blackg]

You guys are over analyzing the way females choose their partners. It's like rich people looking at modern art, you think you are able to see the "artists" feelings and life experiences trough an old shoe in the middle of a white room. In reality it's just an old shoe.

No it is not just an old shoe.
The point of art, in this case an old shoe in a white room, is... what does that decrepit old shoe mean to the observer??

 

[Dench57]

You guys are over analyzing the way females choose their partners. It's like rich people looking at modern art, you think you are able to see the "artists" feelings and life experiences trough an old shoe in the middle of a white room. In reality it's just an old shoe.

Imagine this scenario: A girl you're extremely attracted to sits next to you at a bar and says hello. The conversation isn't really flowing and she get's shy and turns red. But, she is obviously into you. Would you care about the fact that she is shy? Of course you wouldn't.

LOOKS
O
O
K
S

People on here keep talking about men and women in dating/attraction like they're exactly the same, as if what women want in a man, men also want in a woman. Women generally don't want weak, awkward beta males. They want to be lead, "soft domination" as @zircon puts it. What man wants his girlfriend to be in charge? Men just don't want the woman to have a dick bigger than him. Looks are obviously paramount, and the better looking she finds you, the more of your sh*t traits she will let slide.

 

[blackg]

Y'know what I think the truth is? Your hostility comes from a naive past of being one of the idiots who believed in PUA, only then to discover it's a scam.

I bet you put a lot of time and/or even money into it, and came out with nothing.

Now we have to listen to extreme views from someone who is useless at even basic chat with women, and can only do well when it's on a plate and everything is pre-determined - to me you've already practically admitted this.

The first part could be true but the last part is a bit harsh.
Keep it civil, please.

 

[Dench57]

So now red pill theory thinks that males and females are of the same mindset?! Riiiight. That only contradicts about 95% of the rest of it, but when it suits- "You think the exact same as women do!".

Males are clearly the instigator, for many reasons, but to boil it down as simply as possible, we'll gladly sleep with as many as possible, we'll even lower our normal standards to sleep with more. Women try to be more picky because they tend to want security as well as an attractive hot screw (difficult balancing act indeed).

Unless a woman is dripping horny for someone she can gladly not put herself out there, women can go ages without sex and it may leave them frustrated here and there but it still won't make them desperate. Males cannot do the same thing, and we are constantly ready to forgive a woman for shyness or awkwardness, this is not the same thing.

f*****g beat me to it

 

[blackg]

People on here keep talking about men and women in the dating scene like they're exactly the same, as if what women want in a man, men also want in a woman. Women generally don't want weak, awkward beta males. They want to be lead, "soft domination" as @zircon puts it. Men just don't want the woman to have a dick bigger than him. Looks are obviously paramount, and the better looking she finds you, the more of your sh*t traits she will let slide.

You made a smart post here.

 

[Dench57]

You made a smart post here.

Thanks blackg, I'm honored to have received your stamp of approval. I gave it a lot of thought before posting.

 

[blackg]

They care about what friends/colleagues/strangers/people who don't even care about may think of them for dating a guy instead of another. What would they think? Reputation comes first.

More sweeping generalisations. Not worthy.

 

[Rudiger]

The first part could be true but the last part is a bit harsh.
Keep it civil, please.

The guy is not being civil, he did the exact same thing the other day when he stopped replying to our debate, and snidely @'ed my name in another post shortly after as his little victory.

Passive aggressive pussy move.

 

[blackg]

The guy is not being civil, he did the exact same thing the other day when he stopped replying to our debate, and snidely @'ed my name in another post shortly after as his little victory.

Passive aggressive pussy move.

Okay. I wouldn't take it too seriously though, mate.

 

[Dante92]

People on here keep talking about men and women in dating/attraction like they're exactly the same, as if what women want in a man, men also want in a woman. Women generally don't want weak, awkward beta males. They want to be lead, "soft domination" as @zircon puts it.

"Soft" is one way of putting it. I 100% agree, deep down they love being dominated and used, and surprisingly, they whine when they get discarded like some broken toy. Some female users here know what I'm talking about.

I'm ugly and beta, and obviously women reject me, it's only natural.

 

[Rudiger]

Okay. I wouldn't take it too seriously though, mate.

I'm clearly making long posts and taking it seriously, so when someone sarcastically throws out your points as being PUA sh*t, they're going to get a hostile reaction.

Fred's pretty transparent. He used to be a firm believer that f*****g vitamins can cure hair loss (so I believe he's gullible enough to spend a lot of time, even money, on PUA), I wouldn't be surprised if he believed head massages would do it.

So watch someone mention the idea that environment or diet can influence your hair loss, and watch him absolutely lose his sh*t. Even if it's a very slight mention, he goes ballistic. Why does that hurt him so much in particular? Because he possibly invested his thoughts heavily into it, and presumably felt like an idiot upon the realisation it's bullshit.

If there's one thing about the guy, and it's a consistent theme throughout a LOT of his posts, it's that inferiority complex, often posting about the stupid people around him with no common sense doing stupid things, renting houses, impractical degrees, meanwhile he has it all figured out. The strawman quotes he makes up about people with the little exclamation at the end (nobody ever says any of these things).

So doing something stupid like believing a multi-vitamin will grow hair, or (if my theory is true) you can spend a lot of time on PUA and successfully chat up women in public, this turning out to be bullshit and the fact he bought into it, is very painful for someone like him.

He seeks out those who now believes in such things, even if they don't (like me) he'll twist it so that it seems like they are, and he wants to hammer home how he doesn't believe in that sh*t like the rest of us idiots (allegedly) do.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

You guys are over analyzing the way females choose their partners. It's like rich people looking at modern art, you think you are able to see the "artists" feelings and life experiences trough an old shoe in the middle of a white room. In reality it's just an old shoe.

Imagine this scenario: A girl you're extremely attracted to sits next to you at a bar and says hello. The conversation isn't really flowing and she get's shy and turns red. But, she is obviously into you. Would you care about the fact that she is shy? Of course you wouldn't.

LOOKS
O
O
K
S

Semi agree, because I've also dated average looking women instead of good looking women because the average looking women were better to be around beyond just sex.

I think this is where fred and I disagree because I think he believes that we will always go for the most attractive. Whereas I know from personal experience that someone who is interesting to be around and is average will make a better GF then a vapid beauty.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

People on here keep talking about men and women in dating/attraction like they're exactly the same, as if what women want in a man, men also want in a woman. Women generally don't want weak, awkward beta males. They want to be lead, "soft domination" as @zircon puts it. What man wants his girlfriend to be in charge? Men just don't want the woman to have a dick bigger than him. Looks are obviously paramount, and the better looking she finds you, the more of your sh*t traits she will let slide.

If you read my post you would see that I was talking about in a bar. Not a date. So, in my scenario it would be a ONS. If you're talking dates and searching for a partner for a LTR, you would maybe be able to fake your personality and be "soft dominating" or whatever term @zircon coined for the duration of the date. But, you wouldn't be able to fake your personality forever, so in the end it doesn't matter anyways.

LOOKS
O
O
K
S

 

[Rudiger]

If you read my post you would see that I was talking about in a bar. Not a date. So, in my scenario it would be a ONS. If you're talking dates and searching for a partner for a LTR, you would maybe be able to fake your personality and be "soft dominating" or whatever term @zircon coined for the duration of the date. But, you wouldn't be able to fake your personality forever, so in the end it doesn't matter anyways.

I don't really know what this soft dominating thing is but you don't really need to fake it "forever", if whatever works for getting someone interested in you, you can be different afterwards. She'll be forgiving even if it's different but still likeable, nobody is holding you up to a mental tick-sheet and wondering why you aren't ticking the same boxes as before.

 

[Patrick_Bateman]

I don't really know what this soft dominating thing is but you don't really need to fake it "forever", if whatever works for getting someone interested in you, you can be different afterwards. She'll be forgiving even if it's different but still likeable, nobody is holding you up to a mental tick-sheet and wondering why you aren't ticking the same boxes as before.

Ok, that's it for me guys.

 

[Haironn]

he is 6.4 on Hot Or NOT...no one caught this?

is it me or is he saying at end with speed dating that good looking people are more shallow then less attractive people or is he saying that less attractive people lower standards?

he is saying both to be honest lol.
good looking people are more shallow than less attractive people - natural and makes sense, like he said, someone who is at the top in the looks department wouldn't be with someone who isn't at the top either, why pick lower if you can pick higher?

and people who are less attractive lower their standards in the looks department and focus on other things, simply because they have no choice.

 

[Dench57]

If you read my post you would see that I was talking about in a bar. Not a date. So, in my scenario it would be a ONS. If you're talking dates and searching for a partner for a LTR, you would maybe be able to fake your personality and be "soft dominating" or whatever term @zircon coined for the duration of the date. But, you wouldn't be able to fake your personality forever, so in the end it doesn't matter anyways.

LOOKS
O
O
K
S

I was just speaking generally about this whole "reverse the genders" argument. Men don't want the same qualities in a woman.

I think we should all take a break by re-watching what is widely considered Mel Gibson's magnum opus: What Women Want. Arguably the best film of our generation.

 

[Dench57]

I'm clearly making long posts

That's not like you

 

[Rudiger]

By the way, I am who I am because I believed that BS, because I made mistakes and I learned from them. So using it as a way to discredit me... That's a bit cheap.

But you only acknowledge these things when pressed, always leaving out the fact you once believed in them. So at the time you were desperate, silly, whatever, but you don't own up to now unless absolutely pressed, you'll make every point on how stupid other people are while leaving out the empathy you should have for them, as you were once right in their shoes. It's really just about showing how smart you are you no longer believe in it.

I can only keep saying the same stuff over and over, hope it sticks in your head some day, but as much as you want me to believe in PUA, to show how smart you are and how stupid I am, I simply don't believe there's PUA tips and tricks that will make anyone a golden slayer. I believe the simple act of talking to women will improve how comfortable you are with making jokes and being who you are, and if you're appropriately good looking enough, that can turn you from "maybe f***" to "would f***".

Like I said before, women probably have a ton of theoretical "would fucks", too many that if they followed through with them all, they'd be banging 20 guys a year, instead of in a life time. They see guys who are points ahead of them on the attractive scale, 6/10's often chatted to by 7 or 8 guys, maybe even the odd Chad. Why aren't they banging them all? Surely if a guys 2 points ahead on the scale he should be a "would f***"? Well, it's not the case, something else is happening, you can be right that luck is a factor, but a guy who really grinds in there will manage to get rid of these elements of luck if he can keep her interested.

In her mind it's easier to just take her time and see what happens, that "would f***" could be waiting quite a while for his f*** if he hasn't got any determination to get it done.