Gym shooter hadn't had sex in 20 years

[Oknow]

I would consider him balding, not bald.

Well he is in the advanced stages of balding, and balding severly is not attractive either way.

 

[Oknow]

A positive attitude won't guarantee success, neither does good looks alone SO, you might not get as far as the stud even if you adopt a positive attitude, but you will certainly get farther than you would have if you harbor negative beliefs...or something like that. How does that tickle you?

Time and time again from reading your posts you continiously compare yourself to studs. What is the point?

Why dont you just accept that you are not that guy, like loads of guys arent "that guy". Instead of comparing yourself to others, why don't you just work on emphasising your BEST traits that you have now. This is why I don't get some of your viewpoints.

You should be proud that you are "Uncomfortable Man" rather then some Ken Barbie doll who has life on a silver platter. I mean you may think they have it easy, yeah materialistically they may do, but beyond their looks they have no f****ing substance a lot of them because they won't have to work as hard for success. And with that in mind, it is hardly surprising that most powerful, influential people in the world - from great scientists, businessmen to polticians are normally ugly, balding/bald men. Heck' even many hair transplant surgeons like Rassman are bald! And before you go into "oh I am bald, I can't be a success" arguement, history has shown time and time again that IT can be done, just open up any textbook, loads of pioneers were BALD men.

Difference between them and you, is that they wanted to be a success, and instead of their looks they rely on their brain and intellect to define who they are as a person.

If you can show people that you have real gritty substance, you will command respect from men and women alike, even if at first they will have their misconceptions about you based on the way you look.

i admire what youve said, its point-on, and a normal person who doesnt appraise their inner worth by outer hair would agree with your great write-up.

sadly, if you tell ucman the sky is blue though, he will argue with you. he's uber-stubborn in his disposition, you nor anyone can reach this person, thats why i got a*** with him. hes hellbent on thinking what he wants.

As the old saying goes....Change has to come from within, thats why I stopped replying on the other other thread, it was a lost cause. Though frustrating to read the same recycled viewpoints over and over again.

The sad thing is, despite his endless whining, UCMan knows EXACTLY how to turn his life around. He just hasn't got the inner strength to do it at the moment. I'm confident however he will in time take that step, just not now.

 

[Hope4hairRedux]

A positive attitude won't guarantee success, neither does good looks alone SO, you might not get as far as the stud even if you adopt a positive attitude, but you will certainly get farther than you would have if you harbor negative beliefs...or something like that. How does that tickle you?

Time and time again from reading your posts you continiously compare yourself to studs. What is the point?

Why dont you just accept that you are not that guy, like loads of guys arent "that guy". Instead of comparing yourself to others, why don't you just work on emphasising your BEST traits that you have now. This is why I don't get some of your viewpoints.

You should be proud that you are "Uncomfortable Man" rather then some Ken Barbie doll who has life on a silver platter. I mean you may think they have it easy, yeah materialistically they may do, but beyond their looks they have no f****ing substance a lot of them because they won't have to work as hard for success. And with that in mind, it is hardly surprising that most powerful, influential people in the world - from great scientists, businessmen to polticians are normally ugly, balding/bald men. Heck' even many hair transplant surgeons like Rassman are bald! And before you go into "oh I am bald, I can't be a success" arguement, history has shown time and time again that IT can be done, just open up any textbook, loads of pioneers were BALD men.

Difference between them and you, is that they wanted to be a success, and instead of their looks they rely on their brain and intellect to define who they are as a person.

If you can show people that you have real gritty substance, you will command respect from men and women alike, even if at first they will have their misconceptions about you based on the way you look.

Not all of us want to become the most powerful influential people. Im not saying I want to be a stud either, but the fact is I wanted to go through life being at least moderately attactive. I hate saying this but its part of my story, but I used to be known as a pretty boy. Yeah that term is kind of gay but thats pretty much how I was known by people in my local area. I used to get comments all the time. And getting girls was a lot better. Perhaps a large part of that was my self confidence, but I swear girls just appeared to pop up easier then they did before. I still had to do a bit of work, but the whole thing felt a lot more fun. There is something about feeling and looking good, you go out and you feel that you could approach any woman, and you feel attractive. But since my male pattern baldness has developed, my attractiveness has already lowered. I no longer feel confident about my looks or have good self esteem. The hard thing is, having that lifestyle, feeling attractive and fresh, having a lot of attention from girls, and then having all that lifestyle disappear. Just because of minor recession. It serously does have that effect. Our heads/faces are like paintings or mathmatical equations, and even minor changes can spoil the equation and essence of your looks. Getting used to all that attention and then have it practically disappear is hard to take. Girls were my hobby.

Im just making the point that all humans want to be attractive, given the choice, who do you rather be? A guy that gets with loads of bueatiful women in his life, or some bald scientist? Who do you reckon was happier?

There is nothing wrong with wanting to feel at least moderatly attractive. The social heirarchy in this world is based on this. Thats the thing about male pattern baldness, it seroiusly detracts from your looks. You can barely hope to be even moderatley attractive with this curse. I think your hypothesis about bald guys getting to high places in life because they had 'gritty substance' is BS im afraid. How many more important people have had hair? Its just statistically likely that some bald men will go far in their field.

 

[Oknow]

Time and time again from reading your posts you continiously compare yourself to studs. What is the point?

Why dont you just accept that you are not that guy, like loads of guys arent "that guy". Instead of comparing yourself to others, why don't you just work on emphasising your BEST traits that you have now. This is why I don't get some of your viewpoints.

You should be proud that you are "Uncomfortable Man" rather then some Ken Barbie doll who has life on a silver platter. I mean you may think they have it easy, yeah materialistically they may do, but beyond their looks they have no f****ing substance a lot of them because they won't have to work as hard for success. And with that in mind, it is hardly surprising that most powerful, influential people in the world - from great scientists, businessmen to polticians are normally ugly, balding/bald men. Heck' even many hair transplant surgeons like Rassman are bald! And before you go into "oh I am bald, I can't be a success" arguement, history has shown time and time again that IT can be done, just open up any textbook, loads of pioneers were BALD men.

Difference between them and you, is that they wanted to be a success, and instead of their looks they rely on their brain and intellect to define who they are as a person.

If you can show people that you have real gritty substance, you will command respect from men and women alike, even if at first they will have their misconceptions about you based on the way you look.

Not all of us want to become the most powerful influential people.

Looks fade, power does too, but you have a better chance of leaving a legacy behind (and get plenty of *** whilst at it). I know which one I would prefer.

Im not saying I want to be a stud either, but the fact is I wanted to go through life being at least moderately attactive. I hate saying this but its part of my story, but I used to be known as a pretty boy. Yeah that term is kind of gay but thats pretty much how I was known by people in my local area. I used to get comments all the time. And getting girls was a lot better. Perhaps a large part of that was my self confidence, but I swear girls just appeared to pop up easier then they did before. I still had to do a bit of work, but the whole thing felt a lot more fun. There is something about feeling and looking good, you go out and you feel that you could approach any woman, and you feel attractive. But since my male pattern baldness has developed, my attractiveness has already lowered. I no longer feel confident about my looks or have good self esteem. The hard thing is, having that lifestyle, feeling attractive and fresh, having a lot of attention from girls, and then having all that lifestyle disappear. Just because of minor recession. It serously does have that effect. Our heads/faces are like paintings or mathmatical equations, and even minor changes can spoil the equation and essence of your looks. Getting used to all that attention and then have it practically disappear is hard to take. Girls were my hobby.

If you had an exciting lifestyle, was well off. I seriously don't think girls will care about your minor recession. Your problem was you put all of your eggs in one basket, and relied on your looks 100% so all the minor recession did was put your life in perspective. I don't know you personally, but it sounds like you dont have that much going for you outside of it.

Yes, one can argue that there is some degree of overcompensating here, but so what?

Im just making the point that all humans want to be attractive, given the choice, who do you rather be? A guy that gets with loads of bueatiful women in his life, or some bald scientist? Who do you reckon was happier?

There is nothing wrong with wanting to feel at least moderatly attractive. The social heirarchy in this world is based on this. Thats the thing about male pattern baldness, it seroiusly detracts from your looks. You can barely hope to be even moderatley attractive with this curse. I think your hypothesis about bald guys getting to high places in life because they had 'gritty substance' is BS im afraid. How many more important people have had hair? Its just statistically likely that some bald men will go far in their field.

No you are right, feeling good about yourself is a great thing. And yes from having my own physical problems I can relate which is why I am posting on a hairloss site to begin with - due to the fear of losing it.

But you cannot deny that there are many bald people that have made it. America even had a quite bald president in the form of Eisenhower - Britain with Churchill. There are others, just google it you will see so many baldies making a success out of their lives.

 

[qball01]

Yeah, I rely on that beard stubble to define other features. I've had someone say to me once that my head looks upside down. That is when I flipped him off upside down, but I look TOO naked when I shave my face down to the skin. I said something positive not too long ago that is in the same vein as what you are saying. I'll have to dig it up. A positive attitude won't guarantee success, neither does good looks alone SO, you might not get as far as the stud even if you adopt a positive attitude, but you will certainly get farther than you would have if you harbor negative beliefs...or something like that. How does that tickle you?

lol...but what are you doing with that "theory?" You're analyzing it but are you applying it? The point is to try your f*****g hardest not to even think about what some stud with hair is doing...but what you're doing compared to your past self. Honestly man...while I'm obviously intent on avoiding the same fate as you and of course part of me dislikes being bald and losing more hair....but if I didn't know for a fact that the majority of normal people with hairloss deal with it and live life should be enough to convince you or me or anybody. Hairloss is happening at a younger age today so there are a lot more people who go bald in their twenties and have to deal with it...it sucks, but do you know what sucks more?....letting it make your life suck and then blaming something that is common in many men and widely accepted in today's society (at least a LOT more than it was 20 years ago) on why things haven't turned out well....anybody successful will tell you thats a loser attitude...when bad sh*t happens, there are the type of people who acknowledge it and try their BEST to overcome it...then there are those who blame everything on the bad circumstance and eventually grow comfortable with the familiarity of pain....have you ever considered the theory that maybe you're scared of success? Would you really know what to do if it started happening?

Just the fact that Neil Straus exists should help convince you the power of what I'm talking about...especially considering hes bald too and SHORT. He never got girls when he had hair...and then he forced himself to learn how to interact with them. He put himself through a lot of trial and error and faced rejection A LOT until he became successful. Thats what ANYBODY goes through in life...and thats what it WOULD take for you to get better...could you handle it? Rude people and comments would be a very unfortunate part of it from time to time but the end result depends entirely on you man....thats the beauty of adulthood...while a lot of things are out of your control (like baldness)...you're ultimately responsible for your own success.

 

[Hope4hairRedux]

If you had an exciting lifestyle, was well off. I seriously don't think girls will care about your minor recession. Your problem was you put all of your eggs in one basket, and relied on your looks 100% so all the minor recession did was put your life in perspective. I don't know you personally, but it sounds like you dont have that much going for you outside of it.

I dont understand what you have written there.

You dont think girls will care about my minor recession? good for you. First of its not minor. I have seen your hair loss and I have lost way more. Also it just so happens that my look is being more dramatically changed by hair loss then perhaps others do. Its not like every good looking guy that goes bald will still look good looking, it depends on their head shape and numerous factors.

The only person that really can judge me is me. I want to look in the mirror and feel attractive, what others think of it is less important. I knew I looked good a few years ago, you just know when you do, and I just know that its not the same now. I dont need validation from other people to tell me how I look; I know that for myself.

No, you dont know me personally, you can never really judge someone either from a collection of words on the internet either. I dont really know you, but you sound like a patronising guy that comes on here preaching all this psuedo-psychology bullshit. Do yourself a favour and shut the f*** up with all your sh*t for once, and just try and become a bit more realistic, stop kidding yourself.

No you are right, feeling good about yourself is a great thing. And yes from having my own physical problems I can relate which is why I am posting on a hairloss site to begin with - due to the fear of losing it.

But you cannot deny that there are many bald people that have made it. America even had a quite bald president in the form of Eisenhower - Britain with Churchill. There are others, just google it you will see so many baldies making a success out of their lives.

Im not denying bald people 'havnt made it', but I dont personally care about their acheivements, good for them. I want to feel happy, and I cant feel happy when I feel ugly and balding, understand ? Did you know that Winston Churchill suffered from depression thoughout his life and that he was an alcoholic? Yes he was respected, but did he lead an enjoyable life?

Just wait a few more years then you might become a bit more humbled and realize what hair loss really does to you.

 

[s.a.f]

it is hardly surprising that most powerful, influential people in the world - from great scientists, businessmen to polticians are normally ugly, balding/bald men.

Looks fade, power does too, but you have a better chance of leaving a legacy behind (and get plenty of *** whilst at it). I know which one I would prefer.

But you cannot deny that there are many bald people that have made it. America even had a quite bald president in the form of Eisenhower - Britain with Churchill.

I would say that the % of bald successful men is no greater than average.

Looks dont really fade a guy in his 20's who is attractive to women in their 20's and 30's will still be considered attractive to women of his generation when he's older. Look at Robert Redford, Warren Beaty ect obviously they cant compete for the 20 yr olds but they're still desribed as handsome even in their 70's.
A ugly guy who is'nt attractive to women in his 20's still wont get them in his 40's, 50's, 60's ...

And how many Bald presidents have their been in the the last 30 or so years. Tragicly although Churchill is regarded as Britains greatest Prime Minister I somehow doubt that these days 'the people' would vote for a fat bald guy.

 

[s.a.f]

i admire what youve said, its point-on, and a normal person who doesnt appraise their inner worth by outer hair would agree with your great write-up.

sadly, if you tell ucman the sky is blue though, he will argue with you. he's uber-stubborn in his disposition, you nor anyone can reach this person, thats why i got a*** with him. hes hellbent on thinking what he wants.

I think someone has hacked into Rheinblick03's account. :shock:

Surely he meant to put:

Fo shizzle my nizzle, that cracker *** honky mo fo Uc man needs to keep his wack sh*t on the D lo. Word! ya dig?

 

[Oknow]

If you had an exciting lifestyle, was well off. I seriously don't think girls will care about your minor recession. Your problem was you put all of your eggs in one basket, and relied on your looks 100% so all the minor recession did was put your life in perspective. I don't know you personally, but it sounds like you dont have that much going for you outside of it.

I dont understand what you have written there.

You dont think girls will care about my minor recession? good for you. First of its not minor. I have seen your hair loss and I have lost way more. Also it just so happens that my look is being more dramatically changed by hair loss then perhaps others do. Its not like every good looking guy that goes bald will still look good looking, it depends on their head shape and numerous factors.

The only person that really can judge me is me. I want to look in the mirror and feel attractive, what others think of it is less important. I knew I looked good a few years ago, you just know when you do, and I just know that its not the same now. I dont need validation from other people to tell me how I look; I know that for myself.

No, you dont know me personally, you can never really judge someone either from a collection of words on the internet either. I dont really know you, but you sound like a patronising guy that comes on here preaching all this psuedo-psychology bullshit. Do yourself a favour and shut the f*ck up with all your sh*t for once, and just try and become a bit more realistic, stop kidding yourself.

Mate just listen read/your posts, you place too much empasis on one individual component (namely your hair). By the sounds of it you are not even a NW6, and from that standpoint its an even bigger joke. So until that happens you should be living every day as your last and having a blast out there. UCMan will kill for your locks.

No you are right, feeling good about yourself is a great thing. And yes from having my own physical problems I can relate which is why I am posting on a hairloss site to begin with - due to the fear of losing it.

But you cannot deny that there are many bald people that have made it. America even had a quite bald president in the form of Eisenhower - Britain with Churchill. There are others, just google it you will see so many baldies making a success out of their lives.

Im not denying bald people 'havnt made it', but I dont personally care about their acheivements, good for them. I want to feel happy, and I cant feel happy when I feel ugly and balding, understand ? Did you know that Winston Churchill suffered from depression thoughout his life and that he was an alcoholic? Yes he was respected, but did he lead an enjoyable life?

Just wait a few more years then you might become a bit more humbled and realize what hair loss really does to you.

I never said Hairloss did not suck Hair4Redux, of course it does, but the best you can do in a bad situation is to work on other attributes that you can control, you have obviously chosen to see the negatives rather then the positives when it comes to hair loss. Anyway, seriously, what do I care. If you choose to develop a limiting belief based on your hair - only for it to worsen as you lose more hair then so be it. Cos the reality is, that is what is going to happen to you at this rate, but I hope personally for your sake that it stabalises. At least right now you probably have enough hair to style. (again looking at this from a positive perspective)

I have lost hair, and yes it bothers me, but I am not handling it in the same way as you - Ive taken a different in approach and a lot more happier with myself as a result. Sure if I hit NW6 I could be just as depressed as UCman, but until that happens I am going to enjoy my life, rather then take something that I have for granted. You should be doing the same.

 

[Oknow]

it is hardly surprising that most powerful, influential people in the world - from great scientists, businessmen to polticians are normally ugly, balding/bald men.

Looks fade, power does too, but you have a better chance of leaving a legacy behind (and get plenty of *** whilst at it). I know which one I would prefer.

But you cannot deny that there are many bald people that have made it. America even had a quite bald president in the form of Eisenhower - Britain with Churchill.

I would say that the % of bald successful men is no greater than average.

Looks dont really fade a guy in his 20's who is attractive to women in their 20's and 30's will still be considered attractive to women of his generation when he's older. Look at Robert Redford, Warren Beaty ect obviously they cant compete for the 20 yr olds but they're still desribed as handsome even in their 70's.
A ugly guy who is'nt attractive to women in his 20's still wont get them in his 40's, 50's, 60's ...

And how many Bald presidents have their been in the the last 30 or so years. Tragicly although Churchill is regarded as Britains greatest Prime Minister I somehow doubt that these days 'the people' would vote for a fat bald guy.

I don't deny that going bald/balding affects one looks. But for many of these guys they place so much emphasis on it that they make it sound like the ultimate deal breaker. It is like their whole life evolves around women!

Life is not all about women, that is essentially the point I was trying to make. Yes they may be less desirable to women due to balding/going bald, but that shouldn't stop them from trying to make a success out of themselves.

SAF, yes there are not many, you are right president/prime-minsiters that are bald. But are you honestly going to tell me that if guys like Lenin, Churchill, and Eisenhower carried the mindset that UCMan and Hair4redux are carrying that they will even get themself into that position anyway.

We both know they just wouldn't, they would fall under the first hurdle by worrying about their hair too much...and besides there are plenty of successful politicians out there that are bald but are not PMs, such as McCain, Iain Duncan Smith, William Hague to name a few.

 

[qball01]

The only person that really can judge me is me. I want to look in the mirror and feel attractive, what others think of it is less important. I knew I looked good a few years ago, you just know when you do, and I just know that its not the same now. I dont need validation from other people to tell me how I look; I know that for myself.

absolute bullshit...your own mind is capable of playing tricks on you like you wouldn't believe. How do you know you don't have body dysmorphic disorder, which it definitely sounds like you're developing at least a mild case of?...if thats the case you could look completely normal to the outside world and think you look like a freak...what you say is BULLSHIT. Your recession is prbly not noticeable to the majority of people and hasn't made much of a difference to how you look...but you're freaking out and blowing tings out of proportion.

 

[Oknow]

The only person that really can judge me is me. I want to look in the mirror and feel attractive, what others think of it is less important. I knew I looked good a few years ago, you just know when you do, and I just know that its not the same now. I dont need validation from other people to tell me how I look; I know that for myself.

absolute bullshit...your own mind is capable of playing tricks on you like you wouldn't believe. How do you know you don't have body dysmorphic disorder, which it definitely sounds like you're developing at least a mild case of?...if thats the case you could look completely normal to the outside world and think you look like a freak...what you say is BULLSHIT. Your recession is prbly not noticeable to the majority of people and hasn't made much of a difference to how you look...but you're freaking out and blowing tings out of proportion.

BTW Qball you quoted me. hahahaha

This is exactly what I am trying to hammer home with this guy. Sadly, the BDD is going to get worse and worse as he loses more and more hair. And for the record I really wish that it stabalises in the same way as it has done with me. (touch wood so far it has)

Hair4Redux, if you don't want to listen to me, go and listen to a guy that shaves his hair off completely (qball01).

Rather than giving me a death wish; that I become bald!

 

[Hope4hairRedux]

absolute bullshit...your own mind is capable of playing tricks on you like you wouldn't believe. How do you know you don't have body dysmorphic disorder, which it definitely sounds like you're developing at least a mild case of?...if thats the case you could look completely normal to the outside world and think you look like a freak...what you say is BULLSHIT. Your recession is prbly not noticeable to the majority of people and hasn't made much of a difference to how you look...but you're freaking out and blowing tings out of proportion.

BTW Qball you quoted me. hahahaha

This is exactly what I am trying to hammer home with this guy. Sadly, the BDD is going to get worse and worse as he loses more and more hair. And for the record I really wish that it stabalises in the same way as it has done with me. (touch wood so far it has)

Hair4Redux, if you don't want to listen to me, go and listen to a guy that shaves his hair off completely (qball01).

Rather than giving me a death wish; that I become bald!

Im sick of tired of 'BDD' terms being thrown around the whole time. Am I slightly obsessive about my hair loss? Yes, to an extent I am.

But to an extent, my worry and depression over hair loss is understandable. If it wasnt, then no one would care about their hair loss. But the truth is, is that lots do. They do, because the have a fair idea that there is a good chance that 10, 20 years down the line, they are fucked when it comes to attractiveness. If you have hair most of your adult life, then you basically retain your attractiveness although you get older, especially if you focus on staying fit and healthy. Obvoiusly a 40-50 year old nw1 isnt going to get as much pussy as he would have done age 20, but still, in his nearer demographic ie 30+ he will still do well. I see many bald men around the place, I live in a massive city. I have seen loads. About 20% of bald men look ok. The other 40% dont look good full stop. And the other 40%? Well..They just look hideous. We all generally know what looks good and what doesnt. And its my mere observation of balding or bald men that depresses me.

Im sick and tired of this whole 'anyone that isnt ultra positive about their hair loss situation obvoiusly has BDD' Bullshit. Seriously. I may not be nw6. But that doesnt matter. There are quite a few guys whose attractiveness can be affected even be more minor loss. I am one of those people. My sides are more like nw3 but my front is so far ok luckily, although i suspect it is thinning very slowly and steadily. I dont claim to be any less superficial then the society and world around me when it comes to looks. But pretty much all humans are. A positive attitude wont get you everywhere. If your bald and ugly and go up to a women with a 'postive attitude' its not going to change much.

Oknow I reckon you are just trying to cover up your fears with all this over the top positive thinking; it simply doesnt come across as realistic. Your worst days are ahead of you. Right now is nothing. Deep down you know that male pattern baldness cripples you. It doesnt take a limb, but it takes away your attractivness ( I will just concede that this isnt always the case..But if you want to test this theory, go into your local village, town, city, and just rate every bald man you see for a day. Depressing sh*t to say the least.)

 

[Administrator]

This is the top story here in the states. George Sodini, 49, killed 3 and wounded 9 in an aerobics class shooting in Pennsylvania on Tuesday night. It was a random shooting targeting women.

His journals go on and on about his miserable life of isolation and that he has not had sex in 20 years. Some of these rantings sound eerily similar to the stuff that's been posted here recently....

I think this goes to show what long term negativity and isolation can do to you.

Here are some entries (link to full PDF below)

"No girlfriend since 1984. Who knows why. I am not ugly or too weird. No sex since July 1990 either (I was 29). Over eighteen years ago. And did it maybe only 50-75 times in my life. Getting to think that a woman now would just, uh, get in the way of things. Isolated. I know nothing will change, no matter how hard I try or what goals I set."

"I dress good , am clean-shaven, bathe, touch of cologne - yet 30 million women rejected me - over an 18 to 25-year period. That is how I see it. Thirty million is my rough guesstimate of how many desirable single women there are. A man needs a woman for confidence. He gets a boost on the job, career, with other men, and everywhere else when he knows inside he has someone to spend the night with and who is alo a friend. This type of life I see is a closed world with me specifically and totally excluded. Every other guy does this successfully to a degree. Flying solo for many years is a destroyer."

"I know I will never enjoy life. This is an over 30 year trend. Some people are happy, some are miserable. It is difficult to love almost continuously feeling an undercurrent of fear, worry, discontentment and helplessness. I can talk and joke around and sound happy but under it all is something different that seems unchangable and a permanent part of my being. I need to realize the details of what I never accomplished in life and to be convinced the future is merely a continuation of the past - WHICH IT ALWAYS has been."

You can download the whole journal here - http://i.cdn.turner.com/cnn/2009/images ... sodini.pdf

Here is the latest on the guy - http://www.thepittsburghchannel.com/new ... etail.html

NW1s will be shot by a mad man on these forums.

Please refrain from quoting the entire post. Especially if you're only going to write one sentence. Thanks!

Admin

 

[DoctorHouse]

Reading the responses you give each other is like watching the "blind leading the blind". Its funny how a group of men who fear rejection due to a change in their looks which happens to coincide with BDD are trying to convince each other how to live their lives. Looking back at my posts, all I was doing is trying to defer people from making the same mistakes I have made. Yet in these cases, its seems like a bunch of kids reading an "instruction booklet" on life and telling each other which is the best way to do it when ironically they have not a clue themselves. No offense to any of you as I respect your attempts to help each other but its like "beating a dead horse".

 

[Hope4hairRedux]

Reading the responses you give each other is like watching the "blind leading the blind". Its funny how a group of men who fear rejection due to a change in their looks which happens to coincide with BDD are trying to convince each other how to live their lives. Looking back at my posts, all I was doing is trying to defer people from making the same mistakes I have made. Yet in these cases, its seems like a bunch of kids reading an "instruction booklet" on life and telling each other which is the best way to do it when ironically they have not a clue themselves. No offense to any of you as I respect your attempts to help each other but its like "beating a dead horse".

Here the wise old hair loss master gives his two pennies..

Out of interest you seem to seperate all the young guys who have 'BDD' and yourself. So what is your relation to your hair or lack of it? You have managed to rack up 1260 posts on a hairloss forum so I dont think your really in that much of a better place then any of us really.

Soon you will be telling people who have had their faces burnt in a fire that they have 'BDD'. Just becuase someone may be obsessive about something doesnt mean there isnt a problem. Theres no smoke without fire.

 

[Oknow]

Im sick of tired of 'BDD' terms being thrown around the whole time. Am I slightly obsessive about my hair loss? Yes, to an extent I am.

You do have BDD though as it is affecting your life big time. Admit it.

But to an extent, my worry and depression over hair loss is understandable. If it wasnt, then no one would care about their hair loss. But the truth is, is that lots do. They do, because the have a fair idea that there is a good chance that 10, 20 years down the line, they are f***ed when it comes to attractiveness. If you
have hair most of your adult life, then you basically retain your attractiveness although you get older, especially if you focus on staying fit and healthy.

Although, everybody handles hair loss differently.

Obvoiusly a 40-50 year old nw1 isnt going to get as much pussy as he would have done age 20, but still, in his nearer demographic ie 30+ he will still do well. I see many bald men around the place, I live in a massive city. I have seen loads. About 20% of bald men look ok. The other 40% dont look good full stop. And the other 40%? Well..They just look hideous. We all generally know what looks good and what doesnt. And its my mere observation of balding or bald men that depresses me.

Im sick and tired of this whole 'anyone that isnt ultra positive about their hair loss situation obvoiusly has BDD' Bullshit. Seriously. I may not be nw6. But that doesnt matter. There are quite a few guys whose attractiveness can be affected even be more minor loss. I am one of those people. My sides are more like nw3 but my front is so far ok luckily, although i suspect it is thinning very slowly and steadily. I dont claim to be any less superficial then the society and world around me when it comes to looks. But pretty much all humans are. A positive attitude wont get you everywhere. If your bald and ugly and go up to a women with a 'postive attitude' its not going to change much.

This is not impossible. Just harder.

Oknow I reckon you are just trying to cover up your fears with all this over the top positive thinking; it simply doesnt come across as realistic. Your worst days are ahead of you. Right now is nothing. Deep down you know that male pattern baldness cripples you. It doesnt take a limb, but it takes away your attractivness ( I will just concede that this isnt always the case..But if you want to test this theory, go into your local village, town, city, and just rate every bald man you see for a day. Depressing sh*t to say the least.)

Ok a few things:

1) You don't know how bad your hairloss is going to progress. I believe Dr House has retained his NW1 for a very long time now. After observation of my own personal hairline, it has been the same for 6 months for example and I am a NW1 going onto 24.

So worrying about hair loss is pretty much like fearing "death".

2) Even if it does get worse, it may stabalise at a decent Norwood. This can make you look distinguished.

So many guys with non perfect hairlines are rocking great hair, Beckham, Christiano Ronaldo to name a few. Also then there is Jude Law for example!

3) It sounds like you are my age early twenties, in ten years you do not know how much hair transplant might advance or if hair multiplication might come out.

4) I have stated time after time, yes losing immense amounts of hair will bother me psychologically. But by that stage, I will be forced to somehow adapt otherwise I will end up very depressed, miserable man. This is of course easily said then done, but if I have no choice I will be forced to do this.

5) Currently you have the option of meds, if they work than great.

6) Even if you receed a little by age, it is all relative with age. So it becomes more acceptable. I dont see many 50 year olds sporting NW0s for example.

7) Women age too!!!

The problem you have is that you are obssessively fearing about something that may or may not happen. When as I said previously you should be living life to the max, especially since you have a hair! It is a no issue for you atm.

 

[Oknow]

Reading the responses you give each other is like watching the "blind leading the blind". Its funny how a group of men who fear rejection due to a change in their looks which happens to coincide with BDD are trying to convince each other how to live their lives. Looking back at my posts, all I was doing is trying to defer people from making the same mistakes I have made. Yet in these cases, its seems like a bunch of kids reading an "instruction booklet" on life and telling each other which is the best way to do it when ironically they have not a clue themselves. No offense to any of you as I respect your attempts to help each other but its like "beating a dead horse".

Here the wise old hair loss master gives his two pennies..

Out of interest you seem to seperate all the young guys who have 'BDD' and yourself. So what is your relation to your hair or lack of it? You have managed to rack up 1260 posts on a hairloss forum so I dont think your really in that much of a better place then any of us really.

Soon you will be telling people who have had their faces burnt in a fire that they have 'BDD'. Just becuase someone may be obsessive about something doesnt mean there isnt a problem. Theres no smoke without fire.

If you read between the lines, he has admitted that he has BDD:

"Looking back at my posts, all I was doing is trying to defer people from making the same mistakes I have made.".

 

[DoctorHouse]

Hope4hairredux, I am glad at least one of you(Oknow) understood my post. I have definitely wasted so much time on here with all those posts and I am big enough to admit it. I regret how much time I have spent on here giving advice to total strangers who could really care less what I have to say. I guess this forum represents a world of no rejection. Everyone has their share of problems and they are not afraid to express it. In the "real world" outside this forum, people are not so open. They give you the impression that their life is better than yours yet its all for show. They have baggage as well but keep in locked in the closet. Here on this forum everyone opens up their baggage for everyone to view. This place can be quite entertaining reading countless babble of the same issues over and over again with just different posters or even the same ones. You seen to think your world is closing in on you because your balding. I think the world is closing in on my because I am aging. Of course, balding goes with aging. I could care less who has the worst situation. I am not here to have a contest. I just am here because I just feel I finally belong somewhere where I can lay all the cards on the table and not to have to play any games. I also come on here hoping someone finally found a treatment that will finally give me some of my density back I lost. Why do you come here?

 

[s.a.f]

I don't deny that going bald/balding affects one looks. But for many of these guys they place so much emphasis on it that they make it sound like the ultimate deal breaker. It is like their whole life evolves around women!

Life is not all about women, that is essentially the point I was trying to make. Yes they may be less desirable to women due to balding/going bald, but that shouldn't stop them from trying to make a success out of themselves.

SAF, yes there are not many, you are right president/prime-minsiters that are bald. But are you honestly going to tell me that if guys like Lenin, Churchill, and Eisenhower carried the mindset that UCMan and Hair4redux are carrying that they will even get themself into that position anyway.

We both know they just wouldn't, they would fall under the first hurdle by worrying about their hair too much...and besides there are plenty of successful politicians out there that are bald but are not PMs, such as McCain, Iain Duncan Smith, William Hague to name a few.

My not wanting to be bald had nothing to do (well possibly a little bit) with women. Its all about the way that you percieve yourself. If you look in the mirror and dont like what you see (or in my case dont even recognise yourself anymore), then that will have a deep effect on how you feel 24/7.

Lets face it if we all woke up tommorrow weighing 250lbs how many of us would freak out? How many of us would immeadiatly start a diet/exercise regime? How many of us would be unhappy and feel unconfident? How many of us would feel like going out socialising ect?

And MCain may be bald but he's 72 and still grows what he's got to try and comb it over.
As for Hague and I.D.S successful? Not with the general public.
I can remember my own dad who's a NW6 seeing I.D.S become leader of the conservatives and the first thing he said was "no one is going to vote for that bald bastard" and he was right Hague and I.D.S failed miserably neither came anywhere near to being elected, whilst whats the betting that Cameron who looks more like a young Tony Blair will probably the next PM.

Its a vicous circle I saw myself go from looking like a babyfaced 20 yr old who could'nt get served in pubs to looking like an old man all in a few years. It was psychologicly traumatic. Sure nobody else really gave a sh*t but do you give a sh*t if you see a 300lb kid or a guy with no hand? Obviously not but you can bet they sure do.